378: Turn Your Hard Times Into Greatness

So to be good at something, practice in the moments that are hard. And he said, without those hard moments, you don't get to practice. That's literally like saying you want to be like a great swimmer, but you know you're not going to get in the pool.

Welcome to the Earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author.

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Someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves. Get ready to earn, own and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me?

Here we go, foreign. Welcome back to the earn your happy podcast. And it's time for another quickie, because there's always time to fit in inspiration. And I am flying so high today, which is the best feeling because we don't always get to be here. Right? So when we're here, I should pretty much just sit down and record whenever I'm in the space. But on the other hand, I give some really good stuff when I feel like crap, because that's my truth as well. So did I just say that I give myself or I give you guys great stuff? Was that like a comp? Did I just compliment myself? I'll take it. All right, so I'm not going to deflect that. Thank you, me. All right, so what a great way to start this podcast by being a total weirdo. All right, so last night we had Chris's for the love of money mastermind, and it's his elite level mastermind. And it is always one of my favorite nights. It's opening night and we have a celebrity guest or just an amazing guest entrepreneur or somebody doing incredible things out in the world. And last night we had Jay Shetty answer questions and talk at our dinner. And if you guys don't know who Jay Shetty is, just go look him up. He is doing incredible videos and putting content out in the world at a completely viral high vibe level. He believes that everybody should have access to this wisdom that he has gotten to develop over the years. And he actually became a monk. He lived in a monastery for four years. So just so much of the wisdom that comes out of that was something that I got to absorb. Last night. And he's so much fun and he's so present and he's so loving with everybody. Single person that he encounters and some of the things that he said last night I want to share with you today so you get to be sort of in the room with us. So that mastermind is like mind blowing because people show up ready, they show up willing. They show up with their, you know, their everything, their high vibes, their low vibes, wherever they're at. And we really share so that we can all know where we're at and what this business journey is like. Just what this journey is to fulfilling our purpose and that it's all of it. It's. It's all of it. So Jay really got us back into our hearts last night, which is so important because it's so easy to get into the strategy of business. It's so easy to forget your. Why. It's so easy to forget what you're doing and like how you know not everything is going to feel awesome. And that. That's important to know that just getting back into that loving heart center space, which right now, if you're not in it, it is. It is not easy to get back there. But in part of the journey is sometimes that you're out of it, right? So we don't know when we're out until sometimes we get back in and go, oh, dang, I didn't even realize I was out. So just wherever you're at. One of the things he said last night was don't judge the moment because a bad moment could. Could bring what is your next best moment. So is the bad moment really bad if it brings the best lesson that you've ever had in your life? So one of the things that resonated with everyone so much is don't judge the moment like or bad because sometimes the best thing that is happening to you right now could actually lead you to something that isn't great. So don't be afraid. Just know that every single moment is bringing you somewhere important. So don't judge the moment. We put such an emotional charge on every single moment that if you can just say, yeah, this moment is not. Doesn't come with the best initial reaction or feelings, right? This moment doesn't come with the best emotions. But this moment is what is creating such a beautiful moment potentially. So just not ever judging whatever moment you're in. And there are two things that he said last night. I mean, he said like 25,000 things, but I'm gonna give you the two that really stuck out to me. He said, to be good at something, you have to practice in the moments that are hard. To be good at something, you have to practice in the moments that are hard? And he really went on to talking about, we can listen to all the books and podcasts in the world on being a better person, on being more patient, on being more compassionate, on connection, on, we can read all the books in the world about business, but the only way to become good at those things is when it's really, really hard. So are you able to practice patience in those moments where you are having a temper tantrum and you're having an inner temper tantrum or a massive fit in your life because things aren't going the way that you want? Or are you able to practice compassion even when that person that you thought was your best friend or someone in your life or someone at work is being horrendous to you? Can you practice compassion knowing that whatever led them to this moment, they're not necessarily having the tools or they're not in their body or they're not understanding and that you get to be the person who gets to practice your reactions? So can you be the person who practices when it's hard? It's like, we all want this business. We've read all the books. We joined the masterminds. But when business is hard, are you gonna really go to town and dig in and do the thing that you need to do today to have that business tomorrow? Because I'll tell you that our businesses were not built in the good times, right? That's the easy stuff. Like, when you get those wins that you're like, wow, that was awesome. Like, that does not happen very often. Or are you building a business off of when it's hard because that's the only time your business is really gonna get built, right? Is when it's like, what is not working. So to be good at something, practice in the moments that are hard. And he said, without those hard moments, you don't get to practice. That's literally like saying you want to be, like a great swimmer, but you know, you're not gonna get in the pool. Like, I wanna be an incredible swimmer, but I'm not gonna get in the pool and I'm not gonna swim past the point of where I'm exhausted and I wanna quit. So you're never going to be able to be a great swimmer if you don't push past the times that are hard, Right? You're never going to get to that level that you want to get to in the gym, if you don't practice when it's hard, if you don't push past that rep that makes you feel exhausted. You have to get past that point in order to be good or great at something. So then multiply that by if you want to be great or if you want to be a master. So even in relationships, right? So if you want to have a great relationship, the only way you're gonna do that is to learn how to get through the tough stuff, how to navigate it, how to communicate, how you're gonna show up, how to take a step back, how to remove yourself from the situation so that you can not react, but you can later respond in a way that really amplifies that relationship or connects you deeper or helps you understand that person or helps you create a space where you guys can connect to deeper, where you can talk to each other in a way that's not coming from a wounded place, that's not coming from a hurt place. So you're trying to hurt them, right? Let that feeling dissipate. The other thing that he said is so many of us want to be present, right? We look at our lives, and he said, you know, okay, so when that happens, or when I'm at that event or when I'm at that dinner with that person or when I'm on stage, I want to be really present there. Well, we don't get to be present there if we're not present now, if we're not present in the moments that we don't want to be present in, we. We don't get to be present in the moments where we want to be present. So I noticed this so much in my life, you guys, because I am such an. I'm much more of an introverted person. And I noticed that sometimes if I have a lot of things where I have to be extroverted or a lot of events or a lot of dinners or a lot of different things that I'm going to. I'm like, okay, if I can just get through this, I'll get to go to that, you know, vacation, or I have those three or four days planned in Hawaii where I'm going to just totally be present and drop in. But for now, I'm gonna just, like, I'm gonna get this done. I'm gonna power through, you know, and maybe I go to that event, and I'm like, this is so uncomfortable. I'm really anxious. I'm talking to all these people that I don't know, and I Feel like I have to keep these conversations going and show up as a certain person. So I'm like, oh, my God, please help me. Is there any champagne here? Like, let me just start drinking some champagne so I can just get out of my body and not be present and just get this done. And I'm just being really honest. I know you guys have different times of this in your life as well. And I just had this massive epiphany last night and of if I'm not present in those moments that are uncomfortable, I don't get to be present when I'm with my husband or I go on vacation or I'm with my family, or when I'm meditating or when I'm on that nature walk. Like, and it's the truth. Like, I try to be as present as possible, but because I'm not practicing it everywhere and I'm trying to skip over certain things or get out of my body or get out of my discomfort, like, I'm finding I'm not as present in the moments that I want to be present in. I'm thinking of the future, I'm anxious, I can be present for a little bit, but then I pause, pop out right away. So I'm going to not skip over those things, no matter what that means. Like, I'm going to sit in the discomfort of, wow, I'm meeting all these new people again instead of saying, why do I have to, oh, why can't I just feel comfortable? Why can't I just feel quiet? Why can't I just feel that way? Why can't I just choose to let it be okay for me to show up however I want and let myself be quiet, Let that person think that maybe I'm not super nice because I'm not maintaining or I'm not, like, you know, being the focus of this conversation and trying to make them feel as comfortable as possible. Can you tell I'm a recovering people pleaser and that's something that I do all the time. But what happens is I leave exhausted. So how can I be more present? Maybe I don't have to show up and entertain people. Maybe I don't have to show up and make everyone comfortable and at ease. Maybe I can just be so that I can be more present and I don't skip over these huge chunks of my life anymore. Hopefully this is resonating with some of you. I know some of you are complete extroverts, but are you skipping over parts of your life where you are not present? So if I Wanna be present later, I have to be present now. And I thought that was one of the greatest quotes from him. If you want to be present later, you have to be present now. So, you guys, I am so grateful for all of you and I'm completely present on this podcast right now. And I'm just completely dropped in and really thinking about all the people that I get to talk to. And I'm in deep, deep gratitude. And that's one more thing that he talked about. So before I close this out, I just wanna say gratitude is not just saying you're grateful. It's literally immersing your body with. What did it feel like in a time where you were grateful? Like really allowing yourself to feel so grateful for all the people in your life, every little thing in your life, and getting so drenched in gratitude for even three to five minutes of your day, it's almost impossible to feel. It is impossible to feel any other feeling that feels less than, you know, being grateful, that feels less than love when you are in deep, deep gratitude. So don't get me wrong, there are days where it takes me a long time to get there and maybe the whole day I don't get there, but if it is your intention, you will arrive there. And it's like goosebumps, tears in your eyes. It's this amazing feeling of wow. We are so fortunate in this country. We are so fortunate to know that if we own our story, if we take ownership of why our life is not the way that we want, that we have the opportunity to create a life that we love. Right? We have the opportunity. And it's not until we take massive ownership for where we are that we can even create that.

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So I'm sending you guys so much love today. So grateful for you. Thank you for all of the stories. Thank you for all of the shares on social media. You guys are the only way this podcast is getting out so it means the world to me when you do that, when you text a friend, when you leave a review. Because I want to keep on doing this and I want to be able to pour more of my time and more of my heart and get even more people onto the podcast. So if this has served you in any way, go leave a review, go leave a rating and go text it or share it with a friend. And that's how the podcast gets out. So I'm sending you so much love today and until next time, earn your happy. Bye everyone.

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