384: Emotional rollercoasters are welcome here

My heart feels like it's telling me it's not sure if it can handle what comes next with something even bigger. And as I say that out loud, I know that I can. But I'm in the place of indecision. So I haven't burned the boats yet. And it's the most painful place to be.

Welcome to the Earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author.

Each week I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you.

Bust through your fears, connect to your soul, and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves, get ready to earn, own, and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me?

Here we go. Welcome back to the earn your happy podcast. And it's time for another quickie because there's always time to fit an inspiration. And I have to share with you that lately I have literally been. I even hate this phrase. I hate it, but I'm in it. So I have been riding the struggle bus of emotion. I just cried before I got on this microphone and I cried last night and I literally don't. I couldn't even. My life is fantastic. But there are a few things that I'm just deeply feeling. And when I say a few things, I mean a lot of things. I think that we go through different phases in our life when we are feeling really powerful and really strong and really clear. And right now, I'm not feeling super clear. I'm not feeling super strong. And I think that's. I don't think I know that that's okay. But what we forget is to share from here because we feel like we don't have any value to offer, that we always have to be on the other side of the emotion. And like, I know so many people are going to say, hey, I'm here.

For you and I'm reaching out.

And I love that. That means so much to me. But I'm also. I'm so, like, learning to be okay with understanding that life is this and it's this is. This can be every day. Like, it's circular. And please, I don't want to, like, block people from reaching out and asking me if I'm okay, because that means the world to me, too. I'm Fantastic. And also not. I'm also feeling a lot. I'm looking at the world and I'm questioning myself and I'm questioning everything. And I want a closer relationship with my creator, and I want a close relationship, closer relationship with the people in my life. And I think that these times are the times that make you reevaluate what's most important. And I can't even tell you this was brought on by anything, because it wasn't. It's just brought on by a season in my life. And I'm so extraordinarily happy because things are being revealed to me of what truly is super important to me, especially after just achieving some huge milestones in my life and realizing that those are so freaking important. Because you evolve into the human being that, you know, this version of you that you would have never gotten to see. But also, they're not the end all, be all. They're not the point. The point is the journey it's going to take you on. So that huge goal that you have, it's not the goal at all. It never, ever is. If it is, it's like, oh, my God, you just worked five years of your life for one day. Hell, no. It's the journey of the evolution of you. It's the journey of the evolution of your soul and how you are pulling it through some of the darkest times or some of the brightest times. And, you know, truly the acceptance of every emotion. How I talk about on a lot of these quickies, how it's, you know, emotions are visitors. They are here to offer you something. And I just. I want to accept and deeply love people even when they are not at their best. And that's the journey that I'm on, is also accepting and deeply loving myself even when I'm not at my best or even when I'm not striving for something. But I also love the striving side of me. So as you can see, I'm in a complete, inner beautiful battle of understanding that every day is up and down. Like, because one thing happens during a day that's not positive does not make the whole day negative. I was just on a podcast with somebody, Dr. Morgan Francis, yesterday, amazing podcast is coming out with her. And she was talking about how, you know, if every single day, some. If something, you know, didn't go her way or if. If she let something really bother her, like her. One of her kids was being bullied in school, and she's like, you know, if every single day I let these negative experiences like title the day, or if a good, you know, something great has to happen for a day to be good, you're never going to have a good day because, you know, for every. Every light that exists, there's darkness as well. Because life has to be a balance of contrast. So it's kind of like just because something bad happens does not make the day bad. It's a happening, right? It's just something that happened. So I'm. I'm in deep, deep, deep contemplation and acceptance of this. And I think that's, like, it's so interesting, right, because I've had really challenging things in my life happen a lot. I've had some horribly torturous things happen, and it's like, I've been able to overcome those. And I think that I'm just in acceptance that when you're in your purpose, your purpose doesn't feel good every day. And it's not supposed to. It's not supposed to, like, every day. Then I was on another podcast, so clearly I got a lot of gifts. I'm in the middle of this, you guys, so thank you for just listening. Hopefully you can find yourself in some of this. And I'm not just feeling dead air. Or maybe I am. You can turn it off if you're not here. But I was on another podcast, and I asked my closing question, which, if you guys don't listen to the other podcast, my closing question is always, you have 30 seconds with a stranger. In passing, no more than 30 seconds, you ask them, how do you make yourself happy? What is your answer? Or, how do I make myself happy? Or they ask you, how do I make myself happy? What's your answer? And I was on the podcast with Jordan Dooley yesterday, and she said, you know, don't search for happiness. Like, don't search for happiness every day. Like, search, make it. Make it a fulfilling day. But if you're looking for happiness every day, not every day is gonna come with happiness. Like, you don't get visited by happiness every day.

You.

You can make a fulfilling day. You can do things that made you better or made your relationships better. And really just trying to make every day, you know, better or something fulfilling or something that makes you feel accomplished or. Or happy about how you're moving, the direction that you're moving in. But if you're searching for, like, good luck, because you're always going to feel like you're missing. And it just was such an aha moment. Of. Of course I know that. But at the same time, Do I really understand it? So now I'm trying to understand that, you know, if I'm trying to always get to a feeling, it's not. It's not always going to happen because every day has to come with so many feelings. So I think it's so funny because as I was going through my notes looking for something to talk about today, I opened up to a poem that I wrote at the beginning of the year. And sometimes I write these poems and I write them down and I'm like, wow, well, that kind of sucks, or whatever. I just put that away and I read it and I don't even read it, like it's stream of consciousness. And I promise you, sometimes I'm like, who even wrote this? So I opened it up and I was like, what is this? And I realized that I wrote this poem from a higher version of myself for myself today. And whether that's the truth or not, I'm making it a story that makes me feel better about right now. So it says, let's see if I can get through says, just to be clear, I'm now declaring how I'll interact with fear no emotion is too deep to feel Every thought questioned to be real each exhale an opportunity to heal Comparison no longer able to steal no thought can take me under Every experience weaved with wonder I see the extraordinary in the mundane I have transformed by way of my pain Obstacles are future Wisdom in disguise Relationships transform the lenses in my eyes A change in perspective will set me free and compassion is how I will truly see I embrace all parts of me Tight and jiggly Smooth and wrinkly Kind and prickly Mistake and masterpiece exists perfectly inside of me Failure guides my way Stress reminds me to play Sadness leans into fun Judgment reminds me I've forgotten we're one Loneliness is my alarm to reach out to someone liking me for me no more apologies Letting go of the past Accepting nothing lasts with forgiveness and grace from above I have unshakable faith in the solution of love Sincerely, 2019 me 2026.

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So thank you Past me. And I'm going to thank future me for also pulling myself through all of this. And it's not even God, sometimes I'm like, what is your deal? It's not even a big deal, but your emotions need to be felt and they're very real. So sometimes just talking and saying how you feel. I talked this morning to Evans on my podcast and I talk to my husband and I talk to friends and I have a call on Sunday with even more girlfriends to talk through this. And it's more just expressing and getting it out and letting the emotion move through. And I'm going on so many walks right now and just really pondering what my purpose is right now and knowing that I also have to create it and knowing that I'm also in the middle of a massive decision of starting a company that I want to start. And I'm watching how I'm talking myself out of it. And this is so not like me. I can feel myself afraid of the next level. And yes, if you're sitting there like upper limiting sister, yes, that's exactly what I'm doing. But my heart feels like it's telling me it's not sure if it can handle what comes next with something even bigger. And as I say that out loud, I know that I can. But I'm in the place of indecision, so I haven't burned the boats yet. And it's the most painful place to be. So that's where a lot of this is coming from. Anyhow, I hope that you can see what the middle looks like and that I'll just randomly burst into tears in my closet. So welcome to what the next decision is. And truly, my life is blessed and I love my life and I'm beyond grateful and I'm beyond hopeful, but this is the middle. And it's also so rich in lessons. Like, if I was not here, I could not actually understand people. So while you're in it, it just sucks ass. But, you know, it's also awesome because it's so cool to like, understand and feel. And you know when you have those days when you pop out on the other side and you're just like, life is freaking awesome. And I already feel that way today. So thanks for listening to the randomness, the in betweenness. And I'm just excited to be on this journey with you and hopefully this resonated. And if you're in this spot, we are so coming out together, and we're coming out on top, per usual. It's just who we are, you guys. It's literally just who we are. It's who we're created to be. So don't ever deny yourself of knowing who you really are and what you're made of, because you're made of the stuff of the heavens and the stars. It's all the same stuff. I'm sending you so much love and thank you. Just thank you, like, in deepest, deepest gratitude. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I'm, like, so obsessed with all of you because we're all in this together. So have the best day and I'll talk to you guys soon. Bye.

Bye.

Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought, an honest comment. Tell us what you think, tell us what you want to hear more of. It would really help us out on our journey to help helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again, guys.

Bye. Bye.