423: Your dream won’t happen until you do this

If you normally feel like you can hear your intuition and hear messages from God or your prayers feel very connected and they haven't been lately, you might need a little more space, which means you're going to have to say no, which means you're going to have to disappoint human beings. But sometimes when we disappoint human beings, we're making our maker super proud because we actually get to hear the real message that's coming through.

Welcome to the earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love.

Junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author. Each week I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you.

Bust through your fears, connect to your soul and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves. Get ready to earn, own and earn unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me?

Here we go. Welcome back to the earn your happy podcast. And it's time for another quickie because there's always time to fit in inspiration. And you guys are proving that. I see you driving, I see you going to the gym, I see you at the grocery store. That one's really fun. Cause I like to picture you like grocery shopping and just laughing out loud, looking like a crazy person. Cause that's my favorite. Or at work when you're not supposed to be listening to something else. That's always a fun one too. So before we get started on today's topic, I wanna remind you guys to go to eventluv.com if you know in your gut that you are supposed to be a teacher, a speaker, a leader, a facilitator. If you are meant to have an event or ret, or a mastermind, or getting your message out into the world. But there's something stopping you. Whether it's not knowing what to do, not feeling confident enough, not knowing who to ask. You guys, this is literally boot camp for future leaders, teachers and speakers. This is going to give you everything that you need to know. How to market yourself, how to market your event, how to speak with confidence, even the most nervous person. You guys, we're going to confront everything in this room this week long certification education program where when you are done, you will graduate and you will have all of the skills and the tools and the workbook in order to facilitate an amazing transformational experience, multiple transformational experiences, and understand what you need to look out for, what you need to do and what you need to have and do in order to create transformational experiences for. For people and run a successful event. So on today's podcast, go figure. It's about making decisions. Because whether it's this decision or another decision, I really, really want to get clear on what decisions do. And I was just talking about this in my Q and A that is also coming out this week. And this was the quote that I mentioned on the Q and A. And it deserves another shout out because I love it so much, you guys. I actually have decide, the word decide written in pen on my arm right now. And I really didn't think that all the way through because I'm doing a massive filming day for I'm actually doing two massive filming days. Hopefully this word will come off of my arm. If not, you'll see me on some videos with pen and. Or the word decide in pen written in huge letters down my arm. And here is the quote by Tony Robbins. It says, a real decision is measured by the fact that you've taken a new action. If there's no action, you haven't truly decided. And a lot of people say, well, I can't see the full staircase. I don't know what to do. I don't know what my next steps should be. You guys, they won't be revealed until the universe actually knows. Whatever you believe is the universe, God, energy, source, whatever, those things won't be revealed to you until you have put some skin in the game. It's just how it works. And you can try to trick the universe, you can try to trick God, you can try to trick yourself by saying you've decided. But until you've really decided, and as Tony Robbins says, again, burn the boats, you're not truly committed and you won't take the island. So that quote is, you can't take the island until you burn the boats, meaning you're going to take your rowboat back to safety unless you cut off all other ways of getting back home, because you'll retreat, right? So what's an actual decision? It's full speed ahead, no matter what, and you need to put skin in the game. And something else that I heard today, uh, Brendon Bouchard said it on a podcast today. He said, people don't pay attention until they pay, Right? People don't pay attention until they pay. And this has been so true for me, whatever that means. If that Means paying for a course. If that means paying for the event that I talked about, if that means paying a coach, if that means paying for a domain name, if that means paying for a trademark, if that means whatever that means, right. Are you going to go to college if you don't ever pay your tuition? No. You're like, oh, well, damn, there goes another year. Whoops, didn't pay that one. You pay it. So you show up, whatever that means. I'm talking skin in the game. Or if that's proclaiming it to the world. You have to put skin in the game to even get the next steps revealed to you and to motivate yourself to even take action. It's proof that you'll show up or that idea or that thing is going to go to somebody else. It's just how. How it works. So, you know, when Brendon Bouchard was talking on that podcast today that I was listening to, it was a Lewis Hard, Lewis Howes, Brendan Bouchard podcast. And he was talking about how he said, you know, I'll know if you're serious about your life, if you've made a decision by looking at your calendar. And I really thought about my calendar and I thought, holy, I'm really serious about my life. Because right now, my calendar has such a beautiful balance of not. Wouldn't say a balance at all. I would say it is loaded with things I want to do because I've been fierce about making sure that I have room for all of my new projects. So it is loaded with all of my new projects from start to finish. It is loaded with podcasts with amazing people. And I also have a day off and I have a day with my friends. So I was so proud of myself because last year, looking back, I had a calendar full of things I didn't necessarily want to do. They weren't terrible things. There were things aligned with my dreams, but I was more reacting to life than actually taking time to think if it was something that would move the needle forward or if it was something I thought that I should do, or if it was something I was doing because I didn't want to hurt people's feelings and keep saying no. And now, you guys, I just know that life is way too short and you gotta. You have to say no in order to make room for the yes. Because your yes is actually creating yeses for other people. Let me share why. Because, you guys, by me saying yes to these different projects and just leaving room in my calendar, like, I kept saying no just to make room. Then all of a sudden, I made enough room, something amazing came through. And then another amazing thing came through. And then I was like, wow, I gotta get even more fierce so that these amazing things can take root and I can add water to them and do all of the activities that it takes for these things to grow. And so now I have this space for these things that I want to do. And now I got to create something. And the reason that that's so important and that's going to create yeses for other people is because now I've created an event where people can actually come to get their. And now I'm creating a company with a culture where I'm going to create a place where people have been dreaming about working and collaborating together. And I cannot wait for that. So you guys, what are you thinking that you're saying yes to by being nice and you're blocking out? Like, I couldn't see these things coming through. I didn't know. It felt really bleak. Like I was like, am I really saying no to all these things? And like, leaving the space open is this selfish? Oh my God, I have a day right here. But I'm not saying yes to this other thing I could be doing. Leave the space. If you, you can't hear your soul, if those words are not coming through, if you, if you normally feel like you can hear your intuition and hear messages from God or your prayers feel very connected and they haven't been lately, you might need a little more space, which means you're gonna have to say no, which means you're gonna have to disappoint human beings. But sometimes when we disappoint human beings, we're making our maker super proud because we actually get to hear the real message that's coming through. Instead of being a yes woman or a yes man and just being at the whim of everybody else. Life was not meant to be easy. Life is not meant to be made up of people pleasing. If you're doing life right, you will disappoint people. And you can do it in a loving way. And it means that when you disappoint them, it's now their journey to let that go. It's now their journey to learn from you and look at how you have boundaries and your life is working out. It's now their journey to let go or forgive or figure out what else to do or let it be their own problem to solve. Sometimes we don't get get to always give these nice, squeaky clean, awesome lessons where you're the amazing coach and you've changed their life. Sometimes the best lessons we can ever give people are the tough ones. The ones where we say, you know what? Honor that contract. The ones where we say, I'm not letting you out of that contract. The ones where we say, I'm sorry, I'm not showing up for you like that anymore. The ones where we say, you know what? I'm not going to be there for you to dump all of this on, you know, whatever that is. If you really want to show up for people, you show up in the good times and you be that coach that changes their life and you be the person who shows them what they need to do, how they need to know their worth, how they need to charge their worth, and how they need to say no. And that's okay. That's okay. That's all good. That is life, you guys. That is life.

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So sending you so much love today. I mean my heart is bursting for you guys. I feel so beautifully close to this community. I'm going to be starting a Facebook page. If it's not already started, you might want to go and check it out. Earn your happy on Facebook. Because what I want to do is start a conversation around each podcast because what better people for you guys to connect with than the earn your happy community where you can start a conversation about the podcast or how it hit you or where you're at. Of all like minded people who are tapping into these podcasts, how rad is that? How did not start this before? I don't know, but it's here now. So go check it out you guys. And I will probably be over there and in your ear and everywhere. So I'm grateful for you. You are the people who make this podcast what it is. And if you haven't yet, if you've gotten any value whatsoever from this totally free podcast that's three times a week, it would mean the world to me if you would rate and review and share share with a friend. Share whatever episode moves you share on your stories, share in. It's truly what makes it possible for people to continue doing so much free work. You guys, I put in like 10 hours to this in this podcast for three and a half years for free every single week, if not more. So I would love, love, love if you guys get value to just go and do those things. Subscribe, rate, review and share whenever you are moved. And I hope that that just taught you to ask for what you need. Because people don't always know, right? They don't always know that that's something that really makes a big impact on your podcast and that can really help. So you guys love ya. And I am about to go do some crazy projects tomorrow, so hold me in your thoughts. And until next time, earn your happy. Bye Bye.

Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy podcast.

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If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think.

Would love it, that would be absolutely.

Amazing and we would be forever grateful.

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Bye bye.