540. Growing multi-million dollar dreams (w/ Dry Bar founder) - with Alli Webb

And the more that we're admitting these things that are challenging for us and, you know, keeping us down, you know, the more we all grow.

Welcome to the Earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author. Each week I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves. Get ready to earn, own and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go. Hey everyone. Welcome back to the show. I am like so incredibly stoked, pumped, jazzed, excited, all of the adjectives, you guys, for today's podcast. And before we do that, I just want to let you know that I launched my light pink Instagram page. If you guys don't know what the heck that is. I am starting a female centric alcohol company that is by women, for women, giving back to women. And I have started the community over at Drink light Pink on Instagram. It is going to be launching in the fall. We will probably be starting online and in some select locations. But you guys, I'd love to start building out the community. If you love this podcast, one of the things you could do to support me is to go over there, follow that page, check it out, bring awareness, comment on the photo, share what you love, let me know what you want to see on that page and on that community. Cause it's actually going to become a platform to shout out women, to share different things that amazing women are doing, who we're giving back to, all the things. So go over there right now and give it a follow, if you don't mind. That would mean the world to me, literally. If you've ever wanted to support me, that'd be a huge way to do it. Yep. I'm asking and hopefully this teaches you to unapologetically ask. Okay, here we go. Today's podcast is a guest that I have been wanting to interview. I don't know since like the beginning of even the thought of a podcast entered my mind. This woman is somebody who has impacted probably your life. You, you, like, can't even imagine how following your dreams can create a ripple effect and just completely change so many women's lives. So if you've ever Seen my hair looking good on stage, it's probably because I went to a dry bar. So Ellie Webb is today's guest. If you did not put that together yet. She is a New York Times bestselling author. She's the co founder of Dry Bar and squeeze. After spending 15 years as a professional hairstylist, she left the professional hair industry in 2005 to start a family. But after being a stay at home mom for five years, she decided to find a way to continue pursuing the creative side of hair styling at a new mom pace. She began offering affordable in home blowout services to her mommy friends which then quickly expanded into a mobile operation by 2009. So in 2010 she opened the first dry bar in Brentwood, California. Which is so cool you guys. I drive by it all the time. It's right next to my house. 10 years later and over 150 plus locations across the US her dry bar has exploded into a nationally recognized and highly sought after brand. She diversified the dry bar brand creating a line of products and tools sold at popular retailers such as Nordstrom, Sephora, Ulta. Recently selling this product division to Helen of Troy for $255 million. She's been named the 100 most creative people in business by Fast Company. She's been featured in Fortune magazines, 40 under 40. She's Marie Claire's most fascinating women covered in Ink magazines How I did this issue and recently Inc Magazines recognized her as one of the 100 women building America's most innovative and ambitious businesses. How freaking cool is that? In 2018, she began filling the digital airwaves with Raising the Bar, which is a podcast that she co hosts with her partner Adrienne Kaler, who was just recently on this podcast. So you guys gotta tune into that show as well. The weekly show provides a glimpse into the inner worlds of entrepreneurs. She's appeared on season 10 of ABC's Emmy nominated hit show Shark Tank. Also another favorite. You guys, she was a guest shark in 2019 and she recently opened the doors to her next business venture, Squeeze, which is an innovative massage concept that lets you book and pay online. The latest extension of her expanding empire where she operates as an active angel investor, advisor and co founder. Squeeze. His first location is set in the Los Angeles neighborhood of Studio City. And you guys, this is just a crazy chain reaction because Adrian, her partner was recently on the show. He's freaking amazing. And then Brit Driscoll, who is the owner of co founder of Squeeze is coming on the show. So you guys are kind of like Getting this whole, like, intertwined family feel going on here. So with that said, you know the story, we jump right in. So she doesn't go too far back in a lot of the story, but we're gonna jump right in to the conversation. So, you guys, I'm telling you, I was like, floating after this one. If you are someone with a big dream, you tune in because it's tangible, and she's going to show you that you can make it happen, too. Let's go. Ali, thank you so much for coming on the podcast. I'm so excited to have you on the show.

Same. Thanks for having me. I know we've been trying to get scheduled for, like, as long as I can remember.

Well, you've been a manifestation for, like, you know, five, six years. I don't know, like, when I first started this podcast. So this really big moment here for me today. Yes.

That's so nice to hear.

Truly. I'm just obsessed with female entrepreneurs and especially ones with golden doodles and. No, but for real, especially ones who are just very. You have always been that woman who has just been really authentic and honest about the journey. And I've always looked for that in just different mentors and people that I look up to because I want to know what it looks like and what it feels like. So I had read, you know, in. In your bio that I just got done sharing about you a little bit about your journey so that we don't have to necessarily dive totally into the Backstory. You were 15 years as a stylist, then you decided to be a stay at home mom for five years, and then you jumped back into work at your own pace, turning it mobile and then opening Drybar in 2010. So I think one of my biggest questions right there is what made you, like, really know that this was a good idea? Because we talk all the time on this podcast about different ideas that we get. But what made you actually decide this was the one and to follow through with it?

Well, I mean, you know, my parents were entrepreneurs, and I've just always had that kind of entrepreneurial blood. And I think it's a blessing and a curse. I have, like, I have a new idea for a business what feels like every 10 minutes.

Yeah.

So kind of been like that for a long time for me. And, you know, and I did have other businesses and, you know, from, like, more officially when my brother Michael Landa, who's my business partner, we had started a couple. We had opened a couple Nicole Miller boutiques. And I thought I Wanted to be in fashion. And that was something I did. I had a dog walking business for a couple, like a. Well, not very long, a couple of months. And I lived in San Francisco. That wasn't the greatest thing, but I was obsessed with dogs like you, and so I wanted to do that. And so on cue, there's my dog. So, you know, I think with, with Drybar, it happened very, very organically. I mean, you know, like you summed up kind of the story of how it happened. But you know, really the, the reason it all happened is because I have naturally curly hair. And I, my whole life that was a little girl was like kind of obsessed with my own hair in a negative way because my hair was so curly and I didn't. And I grew up in South Florida, so it was always like humidity was always plaguing me and I just was frustrated with it. So it just started this kind of early obsession with hair and fast forward to trying to figure out my life and, and then finally taking the plunge and going to beauty school against my parents better judgment and feeling like it wasn't like it was a little frowned upon and all of that. But I finally was like, screw it. It's really what I want to do. It's to learn how to blow out my own hair. And then began my career in doing hair. And I've now been a professional hairstylist for, I don't know, 20 something years. But the particular idea of dry bar came when I had been doing hair in salons and doing my thing for a while and got married. Now divorced, but was married and had two kids and was a stay at home mom and thought that was going to be it for me and was so stoked that I was able to just be a stay at home mom. I thought that was like the coolest thing ever. Then after five years of being a stay at home mom, I got the itch to do something for myself again. And that's when I started my mobile business, which then it became pretty like crystal clear to me that there was a really big hole in the market and there was nobody who was focusing on just blowouts at an affordable price. And in my mobile business, I was only charging 40 bucks to go to women's home, which as you know, is ridiculously cheap and nobody charges that little. But for me, it was more just about getting out of the house, talking to and connecting with adults again. I had like spent, you know, years just being at home with my kids and going to the park every day, and I just Felt like I was losing, literally like losing my mind and wanted to do something for myself. And during this, you know, mobile business, it just really started to dawn on me that, like, I can only. I can only do a handful of women a day between juggling my kids and just being one person. So I started thinking about expanding the mobile business and bringing on more stylists to help me meet the demand that I was getting, because I was building very, very quickly. And I realized that's not what I want to do because I couldn't control the experience. And that's when the idea for DryBar really started crystallizing and thinking, why isn't there a place where women can go for an affordable blowout in a beautiful space without breaking the bank? And then mix that in with the fact that I grew up in a very mom and pop environment. My parents had clothing stores in South Florida, and they were schlocky and not anywhere near the high end dry bar, but they were gold mines. My parents were geniuses the way they ran their businesses. And that's where I learned innate customer service and how to treat people. The customer's always right. And all of those lessons that I didn't even know that I learned when I learned them that were just ingrained in me. And so, you know, and also my frustration with like the salon world, I mean, there's, there's great, there's some salons that are amazing and great, but then there's a lot of salons in my experience that were very, you know, you felt like you didn't feel good enough walking in and you felt like you were judged and it was so snooty. And there are still quite a few like that. And, and I didn't want that environment. So it was like me taking everything that I had, you know, cultivated in my whole life, you know, up until this point of like, how I wanted, how I wanted a shop, a business to feel, you know, my specialty, which was obviously like doing hair and blowouts and, you know, and figuring out a way to like, make this all work. And I was lucky enough to have my brother who's like just, just kind of one of those guys who just gets business in a way that a lot of people don't, just kind of brilliant in that area. And my ex husband, who's a creative genius who did all the branding and, you know, for dry bar, all the collateral. So, you know, in a lot of ways we got lucky that the stars aligned for us. And, you know, I went to both of them and they're both these bald men and said, hey, I want to start a mobile. I want to start a, you know, turn my mobile birthday business into a brick and mortar. What do you guys think? And they, you know, pretty immediately were like, yeah, like this will be the next nail salon, you know, and there should be one on every corner. And so it began.

They just wanted to be around all the hair. That's, you know.

Well, what's funny is, you know, my brother at the time was married and obviously came and I are married, but it was like the amount of women in their lives now it's pretty funny.

That is literally just like my husband. I swear he's like surrounded by women at all times. Just between our business and the type of people that it attracts a lot. So yeah, I don't know if he knew what he, what these guys were all getting into with that. So.

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Okay, so as far as the idea, because I know that. So you just said that they were excited about the idea, so you have them on your side. But this was a fairly new idea. Like there were not places that were specifically blow dry bars. So how did you, number one, how do you think that you get people to buy into an idea? Are they buying you? Are they buying your enthusiasm? Are they buying data? What did you do?

Well, I mean, in the beginning there was nothing else like dry bar. The concept of blow dry bars were not a thing. You know, we're 10 years old and there was nothing, nothing like it. You know, there was hair salons that were doing blowouts. They were charging an arm and a leg for them. And then there was like the discount chains. You know, if you're based in la, it's like the Fantastic Sands or in New York, like the Jean Louis David and then like everything in between. And those places were relatively cheap. But the experience wasn't great. You know, you're sitting next to like a kid getting a haircut. Like, the lighting is bad, the pricing is variable. So it just. There wasn't a good experience, just didn't exist. And there wasn't a good experience. So I felt like, you know, like I couldn't believe that this wasn't a thing that, you know, that has existed. And I feel like it was like this behavior that our grandmothers and grandmothers, grandmothers, generation had done and, you know, just somehow went away, which I understand why it did, but that behavior went away. It just wasn't the thing that stylist wanted to do. They wanted to focus that hour on where they'd make, you know, a lot of money. And I felt like if we can do enough blowouts in, you know, in a day, that this business could be a viable business. And by the way, that number was like 30 to 40 blowouts a day was what we were aiming for. You know, and now that would be like terrible. I mean, we. Well, now we're doing nothing because of COVID But, you know, generally our shops are, you know, averaging anywhere from 80 to 150 blowouts a day. So, you know, that's kind of how the model worked. And that was like, you know, what we knew, what we knew we need to do for it to work. But I don't know if I specifically answered your question. I think I got lost. What did you specifically ask me?

When you're getting to. Which that was all great, but when you're getting to get other people who. You said the idea wasn't around yet, like getting other people to buy into the idea, like perhaps when you were, you first had to get other people on board for this, maybe for, I don't know when your first raise was or what that looked like. But how did you go in the room? What did you focus on?

Well, I think that there was, I was, I was. I mean, there's, there's stages to this. And in the early days when we were first figuring this out, my brother had. My brother worked for Yahoo. He ran marketing at Yahoo when Yahoo was like a baby company. So he had made the money and he was going to, you know, he, he believed in this idea and he was going to give me the first 250,000 to get this off the ground, which didn't end up being enough. And in exchange for sweat equity, which was a term I'd never heard of. And for anybody listening who doesn't know what sweat equity is, basically when somebody, a partner puts up the money and you are kind of putting in the day to day work. And that was our arrangement, which felt really good to me because I was like, oh, yeah, no, this is what I want to do. I want to be in the shop every day, I want to run it. And he wasn't going to be in the shop every day, but he was going to help me, you know, kind of from behind the scenes. So he was really easy to convince. And yeah, I mean, the mobile business that I had cultivated and all of these, like, amazing women in LA who become my friends, become, you know, my clients. I started talking to them about it and they all thought it was like, a genius idea. And frankly, like, I wasn't available as much as they wanted me to be. You know, it was like the women that I was doing that I. That I was doing blowouts on weekly, wanted me to come weekly or even twice a week. And then they would tell all their friends and their friends would tell their friends. So I got. I was saying no way more than I was saying yes. So when I started talking to some of them about this idea, they were like, oh, my God, yes. Like, why doesn't this already exist? You know, and then that. That really did help give me the confidence, coupled with the fact that my brother and Cam, my ex, thought that, you know, this was also a great idea. So there was a lot of, like, forward momentum in those early days of, you know, people really believing in the concept. I mean, there were certainly, you know, naysayers and men who were like, what the hell is this? Like, why do we need it? And even my brother, frankly, his first. His first response was, you know, Sarah, his wife, who's also involved in the business, she has naturally straight hair, like the hair that just throws out of her head straight, which, you know, was always a conundrum to me. And he's like, sarah doesn't need to get her hair blown out. And I was like, I like, hello, I'm your sister that you, like, lived your whole life with. And my hair is this, like, crazy Jufro, like, not. Not every girl has hair that just dries straight. You know, it's funny, like, convincing him of that even. But. So there was. There was people who were like, ah, you know, this. How does. How do you make this work? You'd have to do so many blowouts a day. And at that point, we were thinking pretty small, like, oh, well, I certainly can make one shop work in la. I already have this, like, customer base built in. You know, these women will come to. Come to me instead of me going to them. Like, you know, for me it was like, this will work. And so that was like, the initial part of it. And then, you know, fast forward to, like, opening and just being, you know, so busy and just. Just like crazy chaos in the best way, you know, to realizing, like, oh, shit, we're really onto something. We've kind of captured lightning in a bottle here. Now we need to go open more. And that's When I, you know, told my brother that he, my brother was running a real estate marketing company at the time with his best friend and partner. And I was like, you have to do this with me 100% because we got to open more stores and we are turning people down left and right. And then, you know, and then a lot of clients started coming forward and wanting to invest because they could see that like this is going to be something that we were going to really need to expand. And we did expand really quickly. And you know, I would say the first like couple million we raised was from friends and family who were watching this phenomenon. And you know, the press was like going crazy for it because it was a new concept. And you know, the shops look and feel really beautiful. It looks like a bar. It's a non traditional setting where you're not sitting in front of a mirror, which is very much by sign so that you're not. As women, we tend to pick ourselves apart. And I learned from my mobile business that by doing women's hair like in their living room or kitchen, they weren't staring at themselves in the mirror, picking themselves apart for 45 minutes. So I wanted to bring that experience to the shops. And so it was just everything. I mean, it's so all lined up that I think people really believed in it and there were certainly people who did. And I'll never forget a conversation I had 10 years ago when I was walking Brentwood, which is our first location in Brentwood, la. I was at the shop just like during construction. And it was also in 2010, which was like the middle of a recession and people were not out shopping. And it's, we were in right on San Josente in Brentwood Gardens. And I remember going there and the shopping center being dead and Michael and I walking the shopping center and being like, oh, holy shit, there's nobody here. You know, and the idea of being on San Vicente and Brentwood Gardens, where, where it's located, it's a thoroughfare. You know, if you live in Brentwood or Beverly Hills, like there's a good chance you have to go through that San Vicente kind of thoroughfare to get to the 405 and whatever. And so I, that, that was my, my idea was that this would, this would work because we have, you know, also have visibility and you know, the shops all glass in the front so you can be in. But going to that shopping center and looking around and not seeing any women was, oh, every business that has been in this particular spot has failed. And I Was like a little haunted by all that and feeling like, oh, crap like this, maybe making it work, you know, but luckily it did. And women came in, drove.

Yes. I, I didn't actually know that I could have good hair until I went to a dry bar and I was like, wait a minute, this is. I like lived in the Midwest and moved out here, I think eight years ago now, went to a dry bar and I was like, what just happened? Like, it was one of those things you need that you didn't even know you needed or. Yeah, it was, it was quite crazy. So I can see how.

Well, and I love that you said that because that was, that's so true. And I, I really thought. I wish I could tell you otherwise, but I really thought this business was going to be primarily focused on women like me who had naturally curly hair, couldn't deal with it, and they never figured out how to blow out their own hair, which is if you have naturally curly hair, you struggle with it. I mean, sometimes I leave my hair curly too, and I love curly hair, but there's just something about when your hair is blown out straight to your point that you feel really put together and it's like a power suit. And so I feel like what was interesting to me, one of the biggest learnings is that there was this huge subset of women, and it sounds like perhaps you were in that subset who'd never had a blowout, didn't know what a blowout was, wasn't on their radar, just didn't exist. And that was a massive subset of women that I was not even counting on that ended up really utilizing and loving the service. So the amount of, like, we were just so blown away by the response the business because it was just so much bigger and of an opportunity than we ever imagined it would be.

What would you say is the biggest difference in the ally who opened it? Like the very first, when you walk through the door, the first time that you were opening business and the alley now, what do you think is the biggest shift in the way that you think.

Oh, man, that's such a good question. I don't think there's anything about me that the same. Gosh, I mean, everything, everything in my life is so 100% different. What a good question. Yeah, I mean, you know, I was, it was, yeah, I'm 45. I was 35 years old. I had, you know, stay at home mom at the time. My kids were 4 and 6. I think they're 12, they're, they're almost 13 and 15 now, you know, I'm divorced now, you know, I live in, you know, well, now I live with Adrian, but I was living by myself and, and, and, you know, so all of those things, like the tangibles, like those, those things are all very different. And then for me, you know, more emotionally and like, mentally, I'm. I. I grew. So I grew up in this business. I got like an MBA in this business. Like, I. The person I am, I learned so much. I mean, I, you know, from like, running and scaling and people and all the things and made a hundred, you know, hundreds of thousands of mistakes and learned from. From all of them. So, you know, and then. And then, you know, just tons of business things I learned and then, you know, the person I am ultimately changed. You know, a lot to do with, like, once we brought in a professional CEO and I had to get comfortable with an executive team being in charge and other people making decisions and it not being completely all mine anymore. And that was a really, like, tough, tough, like, growing pain for me. And that changed me a lot. And I think I got a little bitter during that time and frustrated and, you know, it was kind of like this. I think I fell into a little bit of like, the all or nothing, like, well, you know, because we became a little bit not as nimble as we were. And that was really frustrating to me. And it's like, well, if I can't make these changes and fuck it, like, I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna pay attention. And like, that didn't work. And so then I had to, like, reconnect to the business. And a lot of that, like, kind of up and down was happening for me and like, probably in the like, five, six year mark. And then, you know, and I'm. I'm glossing over so much of this, but in giving you broad strokes, but, you know, then a year and a half ago, you know, I got divorced. And then that was like a whole. Obviously, emotionally. That was really a lot, you know, for me. And. And it really changed the person that I am and a lot of things that I wasn't dealing with, you know, through my marriage and myself. And it really turned out to be like the biggest growth year of my life, you know, also alongside of, like, the hardest time of my life where I just felt like I was gonna die and I was so, you know, face down for so many months and just so depressed and so lost and, you know, that was a really rough time. However, I'm just beyond grateful that I went through it because it has made me who I am today, which I think is arguably the best version yet of myself. So when I think back to the person, the girl who opened and started that dry bar 10 years ago, I'm just a completely different person now. And. But you know, I wouldn't change any of it. I mean, I was, I was like just so beyond driven and excited and hungry, you know, at that point in my life. And I don't think I dry bar would have succeeded any other way.

There are so many challenges to business that I don't want starting to be.

One of them for you.

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Oh my God, I love that. And my, my husband and I always say like you're only going to go as far as you're willing to grow in entrepreneurship because it's like the business will stop where you stop, like growing. Because it's kind of like you, you have so many conflicts between people and decisions and all of these things that if you keep sweeping it under the rug, you kind of just, you're going to hit like this massive wall that's going to make you look at everything in your entire life. So what do you, what do you do now for, like, conflict resolution in your business with people or in your relationships. Like, what are some key things that you've kind of learned in your life that have helped you move through different conflicts?

Well, I think. I mean, I think the divorce, like, really softened me because I think I had been on this, like, what felt like a bullet for so many years and just felt like I had to, you know, be a part a certain way or act a certain way or lead a certain way. And, you know, and I was. And I was figuring it out, you know, and I. Yeah, I think that. Yeah, you know, I'm just such a different version of myself now. And I learned, you know, so many lessons about, you know, I feel like, you know, through, like, when we brought in our professional CEO that I mentioned, John Hefner, you know, he was really great at, like, giving me perspective and helping me see things differently. And. And it was hard because my brother was my business partner and the CEO for a while, and he's my brother. And so I took things that he said to heart a lot. But then I also, like, you're my stupid brother. You don't know anything, which I don't feel. But there was moments like that, and, you know, an outsider came in. You know, John really helped me see things in a different way. And I think that I, you know, over the years, softened. Softened a bit and was able to, you know, take a step back and. And start to take feedback and start to not be so defensive and start to believe that, like, the other, like, really smart people that we hired or actually know what they're doing, and I'm not the only one that understands this business. And so, you know, all of those lessons are starting to, like, come in, as we know, and even, like, Castanea, our private equity guys that came in, and, you know, it was like I was. I started to become a little bit more open to feedback and to seeing things from a different perspective. And I remember things that my brother would say to me when we were starting to bring in or allow the team to make decisions and me not to be at the helm of every decision, and me feeling like, well, they were going to mess it up or they were going to do it wrong or not the way I wanted to do it. And Michael's response was like, yeah, they might, and then they'll learn from that, and then they won't do it again. And I was like, oh, in my mind, I was like, if they do it wrong or if it doesn't happen the way I Wanted to, like, the whole business is going to somehow implode and we're going to be done, and that's it. You know, I was so wound so tight that I couldn't see that, you know, and I couldn't see that there was, you know, there was an opportunity to grow the business much, much larger than what I could just do or my brother could just do. So I think that was part of, you know, how. How I changed, you know, and then going through the divorce and. And just becoming a softer person. And, you know, I think I. I never. I used to get, like, really, you know, the best example that comes to mind was, like, how I get really frustrated with my kids and. And I, you know, I would yell at them and I would be upset and frustrated at them and. And going through what I went through, the divorce and, like, reading all the books I read and learning, like, to deal with, like, some of the internal stuff that I was having really helped every aspect of my life, you know. And then, of course, when I met Adrian, who, you know, I know, you know, who's been my boyfriend for a while now, and he's an executive coach, and, you know, I learned so much from him about, like, language and talking to people and being. Becoming more curious and, you know, and I think there was a lot of me that was very self involved, a very self serving that I had to shift. And, you know, and I think also a lot of what got me out of, like, the deep depression was, like, learning to be grateful in a different way, in a whole new way. And I think that really helped shift my perspective on things and my relationships with my kids and my relationship with people. It still flares up, right? Like, I still feel those, like, fire in my belly when I don't like, the way things are being done at Dry Bar, but I'm better at dealing with them now and, like, taking a step back and softening up, which was something I wasn't really good at for a lot of years.

It's so funny. Sometimes the driver can turn into, like, our worst, you know, our kryptonite later. I definitely have experienced that before where I'm like, but this is driving me. And then you're like, no, this is killing me.

Yeah, it's like our strengths are our weaknesses, right? Totally. And I think that's, like, something Michael and I have said for so many years. It's like, I know very well what makes me great is also, like, what makes me really hard to work with, you know, sometimes. So, yeah, it's like, finding that balance in that and being able to harness the good and the good versus, like, the craziness.

I was just gonna go into asking you, what do you think that is? Like, what now? When it's. When it shows up as a strength, what is that secret sauce that you bring to the table?

Well, I think the strength is that I'm. I'm. I'm like. I'm just like, my mind never stops thinking of ideas, and I think that's, like. It is a strength and a curse. You know, it's like, I'm constantly like, well, why don't we do this and we can do this and this could work. And, like, I'm going. My mind is constantly, go, go, go. I'm always, you know, I joke with, like, my friends and with Adrian, like, if you wind me up and give me. And give me something that you want me to come up with, an idea, I will come up with a lot of ideas for you. You know, it's like, that's how I think of myself. Is this, like, wind up, you know, of, like, you know, if I am faced with a challenge or a problem or a situation, like, I will come up with tons of things that's just not always welcome, you know, so that's. That's where I think the strength and weakness is, is that, like, you know, if you give me an inch, I will take a mile and come up with all these things. You know, you may not like them all, and, you know, I just can go. I get very passionate about my ideas and what I think and what I think will work and get very, like, you know, one track mind on those things. So I think that's how it kind of shows up. You know, the strength is that I, you know, and I'm. The idea is just kind of always come and I want to do, you know, a million different things all the time, which, you know, is not. Is like. I mean, my. My business is proof that, like, you know, do one thing and do really well. I'm in this kind of period of my life where I, you know, I'm exploring a lot of different things, and it's an interesting. I do feel very all over the place. I don't really love that feeling, but I'm to hone in on what it is that I'm really most passionate about. Long winded answer.

You're speaking to the queen of long winded answers. So I'm right there with you, loving every second. So I'm going down, what rabbit hole now? So as far as where you are right now. Because this is a really interesting point, especially when people achieve a lot of the things that they want to achieve, or maybe they've achieved more than they thought they were going to achieve for what they envisioned for their life. But you're still so freaking young that you're like, okay, what feels like the next thing? What feels fun for you? What sounds fun in this next chapter that you're getting into?

Well, I mean, there's so many things that I'm exploring right now, and that's what I'm trying to figure out precisely is like, for starters, I started investing in a lot of different businesses. We, as you know, launched our new concept Squeeze, which is this massage concept, which are brick and mortar locations that are. It's the same design team as drybar and same architect. And it's all very app based. Like in terms of your booking, you book on the app, you pay and the app, you tip on the app. It's a really beautiful design and I'm so, so proud of that business. And we're actually franchising it exclusively. And so that's, you know, and Brittany Driscoll, who's our old head of marketing at drybar, is the CEO and founder of Squeeze and she's just doing such a phenomenal job. So that's a really exciting project to me. We have two other businesses in the work. We've kind of formed an umbrella company called the Feel Good Company, which actually doesn't have Drybar because this is a new entity for us, but it's Squeeze and then these two other concepts that I can't talk about yet, but that we're launching, which will get pushed now with everything going on but those, you know. So I'm really excited about those businesses that were as a team again, the same founding team as drybar, which includes my ex husband Michael, you know, Brittany, Josh, our architect. We're all kind of in these businesses together. So that's really fun. And then there's, you know, outside businesses that I'm also investing in. And I'm actually looking to join more boards of companies now. And I have a few things to work in regards to that because I, because back to like, you know, coming up with lots of ideas and having very strong opinions, you know, being on board is interesting and exciting to me where I can, you know, you know, I think a lot of what I'm excited about is being able to harness, you know, all the experience that I've garnered in the last 10 years of running this business. And being able to kind of pay it forward to other companies and be able to like utilize all the expertise that I've learned over the last 10 years. So that's something that I'm looking forward to doing. And really, truly in such a give back way. There's so many people that have helped me along the way of building drybar. Just a laundry list of all the things I didn't know that I've learned that I want to be able to help somebody else who's coming up in that same regard. So on the business side, that's kind of where my focus and attention is. And then there's other fun projects I'm working on. I have a couple different TV show things in the work that I'm really excited about that obviously are going to be impacted right now with everything going on. I'm working on a book, a memoir, which is basically kind of soup to nuts, how I got started and just, you know, from being a kid to like building this massive company and to like the divorce and the all of it. So that's, you know, a really fun, therapeutic and cathartic project that I'm working on. So, you know, there's a lot of coals in the fire right now and it'll be interesting to see like which one really takes kind of the most theme and which one ends up becoming, you know, the thing. So a lot of exciting things. I mean, I'm just, you know, beyond blessed and lucky to be able to like be in this position where I can kind of hand pick what I want to do next. So, you know, just ridiculously grateful for that.

Well, so excited to see what you do next and can't wait to read your book. So what is a question that you wish more people would ask you?

You know, it's so interesting how I think because of everything I went through this last year that I have such a. I just want people to be really transparent now because I want to be. And I think that that is something that happened to me. You know, it was not who I was at all for the majority of my life. And then having gone through the divorce and having gone through like this as someone who's like never dealt with depression and, you know, but having what I would I guess categorize as like a temporary or, you know, depression because I never dealt with it before in my life and it doesn't feel like I can't. I mean, gosh, who knows if it'll hit me again the way it did. Kind of like a seasonal depression. I guess you could put it. And so during that period, I became very. I don't want to have bullshit conversations anymore. Like, I only want to talk about, like, real shit with people and that, you know, for me, you know, so in terms of, like, questions that people are asking me or interviews I'm doing, like, I. I like talking about the stuff that people aren't talking about, you know, And I. Because I think those are, like. It's like the underbelly of our society, right? It's like everybody feels like, you know, trying to deal with their shit, and everyone feels scared, and everyone feels like all these things, and we all put on a really good front of it. And I think that, like, listen, I think that's part of it. You know, it's like, you have to. There is an essential, like, fake it till you make it peace without a doubt. But then there's, like, you know, vulnerability and being able to say what's hard for you. And then other people can be like, oh, shit. You know, that's hard for me, too. But I didn't want to admit it, you know, and the more that we're admitting these things that are challenging for us and, you know, keeping us down, you know, the more we all grow. And I think that's something that I'm just so interested in. And I think a lot of that, you know, is I've learned through, like, you know, a lot of the work that Adrian does as a coach and seminars, things where, you know, you get in a room with a bunch of people and you kind of talk about all your shit, and I'm like, sign me up for those all day, you know, because you learn so much about yourself. Other people learn because you're sharing your. Your vulnerability and your hardships, and then you learn from other people's hearts. Like, I just, like, I'm so drawn to that, and I never was before because I just wasn't willing to even go there. I mean, I don't really even think I knew what the word vulnerability meant. Like, that word was not in my vocabulary. I didn't even know about it. It wasn't until I'd discovered Brene Brown, who just out of, like, sheer will of, like, God, I don't know, came into my life when I was as low as I got and became a friend. And it just opened up my eyes to so many things, and I was like, oh, my God, I didn't even, like, know this was a thing, you know, I was just so shut down. So, you know, I urge people and like, people around me know that like, I'm going to talk about what's like really happening. I don't just don't really love small talk. I like talking about the things that are better under the surface.

Do you feel like anything in your life is missing right now? Not necessarily even in a bad way or in a bad way, whatever that looks like, but is if there was something that you could pinpoint that just feels like there's a gap somewhere, what would that be?

Well, you know, I think that I would imagine there's always a gap. Right. I mean, I think that's probably what keeps us going. Is that like, Right. You know, I mean, contentment is not a thing for me. There's always like, well, what else can I be doing? I mean, I think that there is. That said, there is definitely a happiness that I'm in this stage in my life, this season of my life that is pretty remarkable. Being very much in love, finding a good stride with my kids. So there are a lot of things that have been off for a long time that are feeling more on and right. Right now. So I'm really grateful for that. But I think what's missing is that I don't really, I don't have like the thing right now, like Dry bar has been my life for the last 10 years and. And of course I'm still involved in Drybar, not to the degree that I was, but I'm, you know, I'm still involved, but not, not just not in the day to day the way I was. So my sense of purpose is a little bit different now. And I am in the process of trying to figure out exactly what my purpose is now. And so I would say, if I had to say something is missing, I think that's what it is. That is what I'm talking a lot about. And that's what I'm trying to discover is like what it is that next thing that really lights me up and gets me excited. And you know, like I mentioned before, there's a lot. There's a lot of things that are kind of, you know, orbiting my world right now. And I'm trying to kind of hone in on exactly what that thing is because I'd like to kind of put my energy into. Into more of one thing. I think, you know, I'm also not really complaining either. I mean, I think, you know, with. With all due respect to like the people who were, you know, really having, you know, dealing with what's going on right now, I. I'm Very happy to be staying home. Like, I enjoy. I have been a maniac. Traveling and, you know, running around just, you know, like crazy for the last 10 years. So for me, it's like, I like being home. I like being home. I just like it. And I think I don't really like it because I've just not had it for so many years. Oh, my God. I feel you. Right? There's just something. And at first I resisted it and didn't like it and was feeling frustrated, and now I'm just like, I'm okay with this. I'm okay with this case right now before it all ramps back up again. I think I probably vacillate on days, of course, between just being really content and then days like, okay, what's next? What's next? And I'm trying to figure out what that is for me. So that would definitely be the missing piece right now.

So you had just mentioned not knowing what vulnerability was, or in a joking way, but what has that. Cause you just said that you're becoming very happy in your relationships. You're feeling really fulfilled in your relationships right now. And. And we know that. That's because I'm sure that you are leaning in, exposing yourself, having hard conversations, all of those things. So what would you say? What do you think is making you so happy in your relationships right now? Is it because you're talking about things all the time or you're talking about challenging things? And how do you make room for that and space for that to bring up the things that need to be talked about?

Well, I think yes. I mean, I think that, like, the communication piece of it and having hard conversations, and I think having discovered who I am and what I want is a big piece of it, I think I was settling for something that I thought I should be in versus what I actually wanted, which I didn't know what I wanted. I didn't know what that thing was. So it was just like a shit show for me emotionally for a while. And finding. Going through a divorce and figuring out more about myself and what I. What I want, what I didn't want on a lot of different levels was really empowering for me. So I think that's what makes, you know, my relationships much better now, is that I know myself in a way that I didn't before. And, you know, I mean, I got married when I was 26 years old. And, you know, you just don't know who you are at 26. I mean, you can't possibly. And that's okay. I mean, and not to say that, like, I'm who I am forever now, but because I'm sure I'll change more as I continue to age. But I feel more like I'm expressing the things that I need and the things that I want in my relationship now. And it's not. It's not just like my romantic relationship. It's my relationship with my kids. And, you know, that's not to say that there's certainly relationships in my life that I'm not doing that with, as I think about it. But the biggest, most prominent ones in my life, I am. And I showing up for in a way that I never have before. And a lot of that is, like, a lot of the tools that I've learned over the last year and a half that have made that possible. So I think that that's the big key or the big takeaway is understanding and going after what I really want and need out of the people in my life.

So what was your former default response when hard conversations or fights with, like, your significant other would come up? I know mine was, like, running or leaving the conversation, which obviously doesn't work. So what was your default response and does it still come up and how do you notice it and what do you do now?

Well, I think it was like, I wasn't curious about the other side, and I think I learned that, and I still struggle with that.

I don't care what you think. Just listen.

Well, more, it's like, I don't. I'm not thinking about how this is affecting you. I'm only thinking about how this is affecting me. And I think that that was, like, a huge part of, like, the demise of my marriage because I was just very concerned with how everything was landing for me and not for him. And so I didn't. I didn't know all that, though. I didn't realize that. Now I understand, like, oh, there's another person here that I need to, you know, acknowledge and be. You know, it was just. I was very selfish, you know, and I. And I don't. And I think that. That, you know, that. That I think in terms of how I handled those things, it was like I was just always thinking about myself more than him, and. And, you know, even with my kids, it was like, I was like, you know, this is just how it should be, and you should be acting this way and you should be doing this, and why aren't you doing this? And it's like, oh, let me actually try to understand why, you know, why are you why are you not doing this instead of you shouldn't be doing it? You know, it's like the why. Why is this happening to you? Why are you feeling this way? Well, how can I help? Like, asking more questions, being more curious. I mean, that's so much of what I've learned through Adrian and the work he does is like learning to be curious about someone else, which is a practice. And that is a tough one, you know, because we're so naturally self involved and like, looking out for ourselves as we need to be. And that's like what our brain tells us to do. And like, being able to like, step out of that and be like, what do you know? And that was one of the things that I think was the biggest improvement, which, you know, with the struggle. I was having my older son who was going through a really hard time this last year too, in a whole different way. You know, it was like I was just very much like, this is just not why is this happening? Instead of really trying to understand and listen to him. I wasn't listening for so long. And I. And I would venture to say if, you know, my ex husband were on this call, you would say the same thing. I didn't listen. You know, I was very just like, you know, doing. Doing what I needed to do for me. And that had shifted for me a lot. And I think that the shift is being more curious. The shift is like listening better, paying closer attention and not everything being about me. But I would be lying if I said, like, oh, yeah, I'm just this really evolved person who does that all the time. Now I'm not. I have to be reminded, you know.

Oh, yeah, they want to stick. Those habits, want to stick around.

They are old habits and patterns and stories, which. That's a real mind fuck. It's like when you're like, these old stories play in your mind and you're just like, really convinced that the way it was is the way it is. That is a really tough thing to break through, which I struggle with a lot.

Is there a particular story that comes up for you that challenges you in. In your different relationships right now? Like, the one that wants to keep coming in?

Yeah, I mean, I think there's this like, you know, old story of probably more in my, you know, my personal, my romantic relationship, which is like, you know, it's like I have this old, like this, like, nothing is ever enough kind of thing, you know, no matter what you do, no matter what you say, never enough, because you didn't do this. This and that. Why didn't you do that? You know, instead of, like, being really grateful for all the other great things, and there are so many of them, you know, it's like this. And I'm sure that, like, a lot of that is control of, like, oh, I need. I need you to actually say this at this time in this moment. And if you don't do that, then I feel like, oh, you must not love me and you. That you must not be as committed to this. And. And so I think those are, like, that's old stuff for me. That's like, it's not. It's not one way, you know.

Oh, God. I have. So I have a little bit of a flip of that. I pretty much have that in my, like, female friendships. Like, just different ideas around. Like, it takes so much vulnerability in conversation when you're feeling that way, right? Like, to be able to. I think sometimes to be like, here's how I'm feeling. I know it's not real, but I need to express it and just acknowledge it. Those are those things, conversations that sometimes you're like, wow, I feel like I'm beating a dead horse. But it kind of frees you when you bring light to it. So is that what you kind of do in the moment? Like, do you bring light to it or do you just acknowledge it yourself, or what do you do?

Yeah, I mean, I think that's. That's so interesting and fascinating for me, too, because I. I also, like, we joke around that it's like a real dark neighborhood in my brain, you know, it's like, I. I will be like, you know, get something in my head that I'm sure is true, and I will be pissed about it. I mean, I think it's so funny. Adrian always says that, like, I'm having an argument with him that he's not even in the room for or aware of, you know, which is so true. And so I will build up this whole fucking story in my mind about what I think and what's happening in the situation without ever actually talking to somebody. And it gets pretty massive up in there. And then the moment I actually talk about it and I hear it come out of my mouth, I'm like, oh, that is not nearly as. Like, when I say it, it's either like, it's kind of funny or silly coming out of my mouth or. And then usually, almost always, I would say, if not always, like, way smaller when it comes out to what it was, like, the bigness in my mind of it, you know? And that is just into your point. It's like. And I think that's like, you know, what? We resist, persists. You know, You've heard that before. It's like, what? You know, I think those. All of those things that were like, I don't want to talk about this because it's just too upsetting, and I don't want you to know, and it's embarrassing, and I feel stupid, and I'm not going to say it. That's my, like, default. Like, I'm just not. I'm too embarrassed. It's too silly. You know, and that's something that, like, I've had to get really. Ugh. That's the worst. You know, it's like, I can't tell you how many conversations I've had with Adrienne that start out like that of, like, I don't want to tell you. It's so embarrassing. I feel so cute. And he'll be like, it's not, babe. Just tell me. It's okay. Just tell me. Which, you know, like, you know, that's, like, the beauty of him and what a great man he is, because, you know, you need somebody who can say that to you. Like, it's okay. Just. Just tell me what it is. And I have found that, you know, to your point about girlfriends, like, you know, I have a couple really close girlfriends, too, and I've gotten now, in this new season of my life, better at, like, saying, like, hey, listen, this thing that you did the other day really upset me. I don't want to hold on to it. I don't want to. And I just want you to know how I felt about it. And it's like, just instead of, like, letting all that stuff fester and turning it into this big thing in my mind, let me just say it out loud and, like, so we can move on from it. So, yeah, it's really powerful, I think, to, like, you know, own up to the things that are in your head. And I think that's the most. I mean, this is such a funny analogy, but when my kids were really young. This is so gross. But if there's moms out there. But I used to say to my kids that they needed to have an emotional poop, and I wanted them to tell me what was going on for them, because. And I really did this more for my younger son than I older son. Which is telling, because without getting too much into what's happening, my older son. My older son was the one who held everything in, and it manifested in not Great ways. In his older life, my younger son was the one who would, like, just fill his beans all the time. And I remember more having conversations with him about the whole emotional poop. Like. And my rationale as, like, a mom to a young kid was like, you know how it doesn't feel good, it hurts your body, your stomach, if you don't go to the bathroom, that. You know, like those. Because you have to get out the toxins and the things that aren't, like, meant to be in your body, the things that are supposed to come out. It's the same way for, like, the stuff that's in your. In your brain and the emotional stuff that you're feeling, you have to get that out. Otherwise you're gonna. You're gonna hold on to it, and it's gonna fester and it's gonna hurt you in different ways, you know, And. And I remember, like, now when I say, they're like, oh, mom is so stupid and gross, but I. But I remember that making an impact and then, like, understanding that analogy of it. And for me, I thought it was, like, one of my more brilliant, very few things that I said that, like, made a good impact on my children, you know, that that was, like, one of them. And so I think, you know, I wasn't paying attention to that lesson. It was like a do what I say, not as what I do kind of thing, which is, you know, generation. I think we probably both grew up in, like, do as I say, not as I do bullshit. And I think I was so caught in that. You know, I wasn't. I wasn't practicing that, but I was telling my children, too.

So much easier to tell people what to do.

It really is.

Oh, my God, I love that. I have so many questions for you, but our time here is wrapping up. But last final question. Just complete the sentence for me. If you really knew me, you would.

Know that I. Oh, gosh. If you really knew me, you would know that I am as sensitive as they come.

That is actually, like, shocking to me because you just seem like you have, like. You're such a force and powerhouse, but it doesn't mean you can't be both. Right? Doesn't mean that you're not both. But I think that's so powerful for. I know that's powerful for me to hear because I feel insanely sensitive, but I also, like, throw myself out there a lot. And I know that you are. You're always out there, so. Ali.

Yeah, I mean, that's the thing. It's like, I think that there I, you know, I go back to, like, a couple things I've said on this. On this call is like, you know, I. There is a part of me that was like, very, like, fake it till you make it. And I did. I figured shit out as I went, and that is how I became successful, hands down. But. And I. And I had to, like, suck it up, and I had to be strong, and I had to, like, seem like I knew what the fuck I was doing. And half the time I did, and half the time I did not. You know, but I think, you know, to that question, which is so great, is that there is this, like, you know, vulnerable, emotional, sensitive, like, person under all of that, which I think is also part of, like, what makes me good and makes me me. And I. And I. To your point, I'm sure you'd be hard pressed to find somebody who says, oh, you know, like, I'm not really sensitive. I don't really have a lot of feelings, like, everybody does. It's just whether you're willing to admit it or not, I think is the difference.

Well, I am so grateful that you came on the show. This has been a long time, like, coming for myself and for everybody who's listening, so I know that they probably just ate up every single second of this. Yeah, just massive thanks. I know how busy you are, and I'm just grateful that you shared your wisdom with all of us. And you guys, if you loved this podcast as much as I did, make sure that you text it to a friend, make sure that you share. Share it on Instagram, tag Allie, tag myself, let her know what your favorite part of this podcast was. I think that's always the biggest gift that you can give a guest is to find out, like, how did this impact you? Did you feel the same way? What is this about? So definitely tag her. Tag myself. Share how you felt. We would love, love, love to hear it. I'd love to share your story. And, Allie, just thank you so much again.

Yeah, that's great. That's great to hear. I mean, I would really love to know that. I'm always really curious, like, what resonates to people and what they're more curious about. What I can, you know, divulge the world more. So. Yeah.

And you have an amazing podcast. Oh, my God, I'm obsessed with it. I'm pretty sure I've listened to just about every single episode right now that I was like. I was literally in the vortex for a while, and I'm like, she's gonna think I'm a stalker, but I'm listening to her podcast every single day on my run.

I appreciate that. Thank you. I love doing it. And now, you know, I'm doing with Adrian, my brother, kind of. My brother had a. A baby, and he's, like, in baby land. So Adrian and I are doing it together, which is really fun. And. And, yeah, I mean, our goal, too, is. Is to get to that, like, under, you know, belly that's under the stuff that people aren't talking about. So.

Oh, my God, I can't wait. You and Adrian together is just gonna, like, blow everybody's mind. So, you guys, it's raising the bar. Go check that out as well. Go subscribe and do all the things. And until next time, earn your happy. Bye, everyone. Thank you guys so much. Thank you so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review. If you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought and honest comment. Tell us what you think. Tell us what you want to hear more of. It would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again, guys. Bye. Bye.