553. Audacity to be queen - with Gina DeVee
15 Jun 2020 · 58 min
Gina DeVee, author of Audacity to be Queen, talks about using archetypes like the Queen as a framework for personal growth and business. She covers handling jealousy and triggers, 90-day goal-setting, and how she scaled her coaching business to thousands of members through a membership model.
Chapters
When you don't give yourself too much space to kind of fake yourself out like you're gonna do something, then when there's not that space, you're like confronted with needing to up level, move the needle, push your edge, whatever it is, every single day.
Welcome to the earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author. Each week I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves, get ready to earn, own and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go. Welcome back. Today's show is going to be with Gina Devi. We absolutely had the most fun conversation, which I think that you'll see sometimes when I get to interview certain people, there's just an energy there that is just easy and fun. And this is definitely her. She is a published author, an accomplished speaker, a podcast host, a business coach, and self made multimillionaire entrepreneur. She's dedicated her career to helping women connect spiritually, start profitable businesses, create wealth from a feminine perspective and become highly visible so they can make a global impact. Her journey from struggling psychotherapist to globetrotting entrepreneur has taken her from first lady's office at the White White House to getting her master's in clinical psychology, graduating from Le Cordon Bleu and founding her growing women's empowerment multimedia company and lifestyle brand. She is empowering women everywhere, showing them how to be queens of their life. Her first book, the Audacity to be Queen, brings together over 20 years of experience in transforming women's lives through the deep spiritual and feminine wisdom of queenhood. You guys, it was so much fun because Gina and I share so many mutual friends that it was really, really cool to finally be connected because I have about four different emails from people all at once who were trying to connect us. So I understand why. So let's listen to the interview. Gina, I'm so excited to have you on the podcast. Thank you so much for coming on the show, Laurie.
Thank you for having me. I know it's going to be amazing, you guys.
We were just chatting before this about how like, someone can be in your, your world, in your realm for like Quite a few years to the point where you think you know them. Like, I don't even remember who was trying to connect me with you, but they were like, you have to have Gina on your podcast. And I was like, I. I'm pretty sure I have. Like, that's how much we share, just mutual friendships and like a mutual circle. So it's finally happening. I'm super excited. Thank you so much for coming on. I really, really can't wait to dive into everything that you're doing. I've. I actually followed when you had your live event not too long ago. When was last live event?
It was March 9th and 10th in Miami. It was just. Yes.
Remember when?
Right before the world changed.
Yes. You guys, just for timing purposes, I think this is for la. This is like our fifth week into Covid right now, so. Yes. You just made that cusp with your event. God, was that a little bit of pressure? Because you were starting to feel it right around that time, right, like to make that judgment call on your business.
It was, you know, that, that literally it was like everything was so exponential. It was like by the, like, the two days of my event were fine, and then like, literally the next day was when my husband and I, who's also the CEO of my company, we're like, you know, if you wait 20 years to have your book come out, I don't consciously recommend planning it during a global pandemic, but we had like this whole global book tour planned and. And it was like the day after the event, we just realized we had to cancel everything. So it was a pivot for sure.
Oh, my goodness. I so feel for you, number one. Number two, I also, you know that there's probably been a lot of beautiful things that have come out of it, and I fully just so. And I know that you probably know this, but I fully believe the life of a book. Like, I feel like my book really even just got started after like the six month and one year mark. So, you know, you're gonna have a marathoner. It's going to be freaking awesome.
So.
Oh, go ahead.
Yeah. I was going to say, well, it certainly gave me like an immediate opportunity to practice what the book is about because like, like, spoiler alert. You know, for those of you that haven't read it yet, it's basically a book on. It's all happening for you, not to you. So, you know, you have, you have to walk your talk. And so I was like, okay, this is happening for me, not to me. And I just really went into Like, I have a choice here. And I think that, like, we all have a choice. When challenges come up, when there's the invitation to pivot, and it's like, what are you going to do with that? And there's this exercise that I have in the book that came from a really dark time in my past, and I just, like, it felt like spiritually, the words landed on my journal. I'm thrilled this is happening because. And so I applied my own exercise, my own book to, okay, I'm thrilled my global book tour is getting canceled because. And as you know, Laura, you know, spirit is so amazing. Just like the flood of opportunities just started revealing themselves, you know, So I can, you know, do a virtual book tour and be on podcasts where it'll probably have an even wider reach. You know, I didn't want just people to just buy the book. I wanted them to read the book. And people are, like, reading now more than ever. And, like, I think people that wouldn't have had a chance to read it are actually reading it.
Yes.
You know, media has gone virtual. Like, I'm doing, like, morning show interviews from the comfort of my own home. So I think that anytime we really seek, how is this happening for us, not to us, we do get the answers.
Let me just point out, number one, I. We're going to dive into that mindset, because I just. It's every. It's literally everything. I think it's the secret to life, for sure. But how freaking awesome. Like, you don't have to travel for all of these different things. Now, don't get me wrong, you probably enjoy somewhat traveling, but how great to do all of these different interviews from your couch and still be able to access all of these people.
It is amazing. It's so amazing. It's like, oh, I'm doing Vegas today and Sacramento tomorrow, and then there's Chicago. It's just. It's fantastic.
Oh, my goodness. Because for those of you guys that don't know, that can tend to be. Your tour can be pretty fun. Cause it's like your tour, your people. But the burnout part of a book launch can typically be like, the traveling to different, you know, news media and outlets and to travel there and sometimes be told, like, your. Your part was, like, kicked off by something else. And, yeah, there's a lot that goes into that. So that's. That is a huge bonus. That's freaking awesome. I so feel, Eugenia, like, one of my event, which was March 27th through the 29th, got canceled, and immediately I was like, and we were canceling it, right, I think right after you had been like, whoa. It was the day after I said, okay, if. If sports, like large sports are canceled and if school is canceled, then I'm calling it, like immediately when I hear that. And it was literally like one hour later they did that. So right when I made that decision, I was like, oh, okay, so there it is. But it's in. Right away I was like, okay, what is it for? Like, what's happening with it? And I got the most amazing answers. So for people who are. Oh, my gosh.
Well, we've got here one.
Okay, well, I'm launching my new beverage company, which is not na rose, like a non alcoholic rose and other flavored light rose. So they're like very like light alcohol, but it's super female centric and has a give back component to female entrepreneurs along with, like questions for connection on the cans.
Amazing.
I'm so excited. I can't even take it. But it wasn't ready yet, and I really wanted it to launch at Bliss Project. I wanted to show people what they could do, and I also wanted to help educate them on different ways that they could fund their businesses. And it wasn't ready, so now it's going to be ready.
So. Oh, my gosh, what a blessing.
I know. I was like, see, there's so many incredible things. Of course there was, you know, just different things for people with travel and all of that stuff. But I just think it's gonna be better for everyone. And we're gonna just, we're all gonna be, you know, so excited to get together after this. So, you know, with your future events and everything and your book events, I think it's gonna be amazing. But yeah, you have to kind of let go. Like, you have to let go to get to that point.
Right.
So would you share with people maybe who are in this right now? Like, man, I just can't. Like, is there. Is there an attitude or something that we have to set aside? Like, how do we let go of like, that kind of like, you know, I have that inner victim inside of me that sometimes wants to grip onto things and see what I can blame or be upset over?
Yes, yes. So in my book, I do write a lot about a lot of different archetypes. So the queen is one archetype, which is basically the best version of yourself in every way. And then there's all these lower level archetypes that want to come in. You know, there's the martyr, the slave girl, the little miss perfect. Who has the disease to please? There's the roller coaster rider that's up one minute and down the next. And so really getting that none of the lower vibrational archetypes are our truth.
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You know our at any moment we have the choice to choose love or choose fear. And you can't choose a little bit of each. Like, just like you can't be a little bit pregnant. Like you are either choosing love or choosing fear. And the issue that we know in our subconscious is like, we're not like waking up and being like, okay, I'm going to choose fear and victim today and then march forward. It's totally just the default mode. It's the trigger. But as we become more aware of the best version of ourselves, and I'll just speak to the archetype of queen as we come more aware of the best version of ourselves, the best version of ourselves is spiritually connected. And so the queen knows what source is. And the queen knows that the coronavirus is not the biggest thing in the world. That God or spirit of the universe is bigger than all of it. And that is love. And the unlimited opportunities and possibilities are always there. It's just like when you don't see the sun and the clouds are covered, it doesn't mean the sun isn't there. And so having this deep rooted connection and belief in spirit and that you have a destiny that is meant to be fulfilled, there isn't anything that is more powerful than your purpose and your destiny. So you just have to choose it and you have to claim it and you have to believe in it. And that takes all of us cultivating that, you know, giving that attention to our purpose and our vision every single day so that that becomes stronger than the fear.
Hmm. Okay, so many questions. So choosing your purpose and your destiny, I think let's just, I'm gonna jump back into, you know, experiences that I've had in the past and that I hear from a lot of different people is sometimes we can feel like our purpose is too small or Maybe, you know, let's just even say, like, when I got this idea of this alcohol company, I was like, are you kidding me? After all that I've done, the thing that I think I'm supposed to do is start an alcohol company. And, like, I really questioned it for about two, but it was coming through so loud and clear because at the core, it's about connecting people. But I had to, like, really figure out what that was. So, you know, I think there's a lot of people who are getting their purpose, but they're, like, denying it. So what does it look like? What does it feel like? How do we, like, really honor that and get really rooted into that?
Yes. The first piece is self permission to be the queen, to play big and to get that whatever your big ideas even are, that. That God's thinking is even bigger than that. And so, you know, we have so been put in a box or a lane by our families or society or sometimes even our business identity. Like, this is who you are, this is what you do. And, you know, as a culture, we only give permission for one lane, and that's not who we are as women. We're multi passionate creatures that have the ability to bend time and space and see things not as they are, but as they could be. And then when you're so rooted in your desires. What I found, Lori, is that the initial desire doesn't necessarily make sense. And so I'll explain. So I get it. I know there's masculine, feminine energy, right? So the masculine is the logical, the linear, the tangible, the provider, protector, energy. It's the action. And ultimately masculinity is about giving. The feminine energy is the insightful, the intuitive, the circular, the creative, the feeling, the being. Ultimately, femininity is about receiving. So when you receive that initial leading to, you know, be the health and fitness everything, and then start an alcohol company, it can seem counterintuitive, right? I know for me, my whole path is, you know, I'm a former psychotherapist and, you know, grew up in the spiritual world. So I'm all about personal development, women's empowerment, all things like life transformational, like the deep, you know, serious substantive stuff. And I originally, you know, like back 15 years ago when I started my business, like, entrepreneurs were talking about leaping out of bed in the morning, and I was, like, getting a little, like, heavy with the whole Internet marketing setup. And I was like, I am not leaping out of bed to write this sales page today. So what would actually have me leap out of bed today and I was like, if I knew I was going to the Amalfi coast. Yes, yes. Then I would be leaping out of bed. And I was like, gina, that's like, you know, career suicide. You cannot let people know that the thing that you're most lit up about is going to the Amalfi coast and, like, eating margarita pizzas. And so I, like, tried to, like, stuff it. I was like, no, no, no. I have a master's degree in clinical psychology and I'm about life transformation and life changing work. And so it didn't go away. So I gave into the initial desire like you gave into your alcohol company startup. I love it. And I. So my work has always been about being a queen, but it's been based on the ancient story of Queen Esther of Persia, which is a true story. Jews know it from Purim. Christians know it from the Bible. Anyone else? The short version is. It's. It's a Cinderella story. But basically the whole thing is that the ordinary girl becomes the queen. And only from the position of queen can you fulfill your calling. So I give in. I go to Italy. I know, tough assignment. I'm like having a blast. I'm shopping, I'm eating, I'm doing La Dolce Vita. And I decided to take this risk and share it with my newsletter at the time. And when I did, I was sort of like, I'd hit send and like duck behind the couch thinking tomato thrown there. And then the exact opposite. Women were like, I want to go to Italy. I want to go shop at Valentino. One lady wrote like, I don't care about Italy, but I want to go to Costa Rica and do a yoga retreat. This one lady from England wrote in, she goes, I don't even want to travel. I just want new curtains for my kitchen. And so what I realized was that initial desire for me to go to Italy, for me was about living the larger life. And it was also setting that example that I didn't see was coming down the line. Like, I only had the internal work happening, but I didn't have the external brand at the time. And that's just where God was leading me. It's like I took the first step and then the rest of it revealed itself. Now today I have a company called Divine Living. So now it makes sense. So all of this to say, we've got to trust those initial leadings, even when they seem counterintuitive.
Yeah, they feel crazy. I love that you shared that because that's what it feels like. So that's that moment Though that stops people, right? Like, what made you hit send? Because I think a lot of people get stuck on the. They wrote the email and now they're not going to hit send because they're. Because your heart's racing and you're sweating and you're like, God, this is so. This is a bad idea. I don't want to deal with what comes on the other side.
It was. I'm also a risk taker. I can tend to be a bit of a button pusher. I've noticed. And I realized by the time I got to Italy, I was so in the vibration of that, that I really did want to share the beauty. Like, I wanted to stop. I probably didn't have the words for this at the time. It's a really good question. But I wanted to stop making my material desires wrong. And it was only okay to go for spiritual or entrepreneurs entrepreneurial advancement. So I wanted to let all of what lights me up be okay. So that's why I hit send.
Oh, I love that. So you probably hit a little bit of maybe the pain point with not being able to show those things. And then I love that you said you were in it because I do think I'm trying to ask myself the same question right now. I think what helped me breathe life into the dream was to kind of. I kept it alive on walks like the whole time and would talk about it and what would it look like and what would it feel like. And that started to be a strong enough emotion to start kind of pulling me a little bit closer to it. So I love that you said you were there. Like, it was so overpowering that that's when you knew you had to do it. So sometimes I think we have to kind of like throw ourselves into it or get into it. Right? To like, yes. Out of our current environment.
100%. Too many people think they're gonna like, think up the whole plan and then they're gonna take the action when all the ducks are in the row. And it's just not how it works.
Oh, man. But there's that faith, right? Like that, that leaning in point. So what do you tell people around. Okay. Because there's the. That point where they're like, okay, if I send. And this is. This could turn out horrible. And all of these people could say X, Y and Z. What do you say around the outcome if it's not good right away?
Well, so the other happens also, right? And then I also like, I got the thank you notes and then I also got the unsubscribes and I also got the, you know, like, who do you think you are? And all of that. But that really freed me because it showed me that I'm gonna get, I'm going to get the judgment either way. And so I would rather be more illuminating to the people that I'm meant to illumine. And I've got a, you know, so when we talk about the archetypes, I got to get out of the princess mentality, thinking that there's anything that I could do that would be pleasing to everybody. If I didn't show the lifestyle stuff the other side of the camp, that's like, I don't want to just talk about business and spirituality all the time. I want some fun and flair. They would have unsubscribed because they would have been bored. So I think that, you know, when you're really true to yourself and what lights you up, like, I can, I can legit get like, you know, my lifestyle isn't for everyone, but it's for a whole bunch of the right people. And I also noticed this, that over the years, you know how many people have told me that they've subscribed and unsubscribed and subscribed and unsubscribed because it was like, so trigger. They're like, I don't need a five star hotel, I don't need this, I don't need that. But then they'd keep coming back and then finally they're like, actually, you were doing what I wanted and couldn't even admit it. And it's a process for some people. So we all have to, you know, follow our own leading and we gotta, you know, go where we're wanted and not where we're needed. And if there's something in you that you're excited about, there's a certain section of society that's really gonna want it.
So true. I love that you share that about, you know, people subscribing and unsubscribing, whether it's something that I've noticed in myself or I've totally had different people tell me that as well. Like, you know, you've triggered me. I've gotten that a lot. What do you think it is around triggers? Like, give me your theory on triggers. Whether it's something you're triggered by or you are triggering other people. Is it something we should explore? What does that look like for you when you get triggered?
It's 100% jealousy. It's 100%. There's an unconscious belief that says she can have something that I can't and if we really and because otherwise you wouldn't care. Right? You know, it's like you're not going to be triggered by that. You might not be as interested, you might not be as like attracted to. But when it's full blown trigger, it's usually because an element of if you can spot it, you got it. Like there's something there that we desire that, that on some level we've told ourselves we can't have, so we're going to make someone else wrong for it as well. Because it's just all rooted in fear.
There are so many challenges to business that I don't want starting to be one of them for you.
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What about the people who are like, literally like, no, I'm not, I'm not jealous or triggered by them. They're really just that annoying.
I don't think that people are triggered by those. Like people that I find annoying, I tend to get a kick out of even. And sometimes they stay on their list just for the pure entertainment value.
Like.
It'S really. The trigger is, it's a different. So here's what I liken to it. It's a different sensation that we experience and when we learn to, we can learn to catch it. So let me give something actionable here. So if you can imagine, just say like your hand just falls on a hot stove and it's like boom, it burns. Like that's like the immediate trigger. But if you can start to become aware, self aware of what's really going on for you, you'll start to see your hand moving towards the hot stove more like in slower motion at least. And then as it starts to get closer to the flame, rather than going into trigger or keep moving in that direction and getting burned, you can start to use it as information. This is starting to feel warm. This is starting to feel hotter. If I keep moving in this direction, I'm going to get burned. Or I'm starting to feel the warmth, I'm going to start to slowly move my hand away so that I don't get burned. And so what I've noticed in myself, when I get triggered around other people, it's like if I can slow it down and start to say like, wow, okay, she's doing something that I want, that I can see with my own conditioning. On some level I told myself I can't have it or it wouldn't work for me or whatever the story is. And here's how I'm going to reverse it. And I Call I talk about this in the book. It's like, write the cosmic thank you note. Because as soon as you move into gratitude for that human and it's up to you if you actually send it or not. But if, even if you just write it and never send it, like dear so and so, thank you for showing me what actually is humanly possible. Thank you for showing me that what is humanly possible is actually what I desire. Also, thank you for showing me that if it's humanly possible for someone else, it's possible for me. And I'm now inspired to move in the direction of my dreams that you've shown me are real. Like, it's just that simple. And when you, when you go into gratitude and realize everyone that's come into your path is there to move you forward in the direction of your dreams, especially the triggering ones, it just is like an instant activator for self permission to go for it in a big way.
Oh, I love this conversation. And I think at any given time, I think right now things are heightened in the sense of what I'm about to say. But I think at any given time there is a group of, of people who are just coming out of hustle and needing to rest. And yes, I'm using the word hustle because I do think there is a point in your life where you need to go full throttle to break through the atmosphere or to learn through an extreme time. And then on the other side, there's always a conversation of, you need to rest, hustle is bad, or pushing is bad, or whatever that looks like. And we tend to focus on the one. If I'm in a very busy season, I tend to only see people who are women who are hustling are X, Y and Z, or this is bad. And it's like we tend to, we can gravitate towards the thing that we, you know, don't want to be, or we can look for criticism out there. And I feel like right now is a time where I've been hearing, I've actually been putting blinders on because I just. We're good. But a time where it's kind of like, should I be doing this? Should I be writing a book? Or is that the bad thing to do? Like, how are we supposed to feel right now? So what is some advice around all of this information on either judging people or feeling like we should do something?
I really think that anytime someone's conflicted, I know in my community when all this started to happen, it was like, it's not okay to make money, but I need to make money. Is it okay, like, I feel guilty for making money. It's okay to feel happy right now when people are dying and suffering, you know, like, there's this whole, like, internal conflict going on. And most of the time when I see a woman in conflict, it's because she hasn't taken a stand for the. And she's. Which is the feminine and the masculine is about the either or. Can I make money? Should I make money? Should I not make money? Should I do this? Should I not do this? And so I say both. It's really like, you know, do you want. I don't mean to minimize, but it's like, do you want fries or salad with, like, why do they ask us that? We all want both, don't we.
Do.
And so here's what I did when it happened. So there was no divine guidance. I was given to shut my business down, to stop. Make money making money, to stop the float. None of that. Like, I continued proudly to offer my programs in the world because I knew that for whoever they were right for would be uplifted and served as a result. And there was a program that I was going to sell that was my husband's idea. He said, why don't we offer it to the community for free? Everyone needs a little boost right now. So we did both. We did something for free, and we continued to sell our programs. In my Instagram lives, I tune into and have compassion and empathy, and we pray for the doctors and the nurses and the people on the front lines and. And those who have the virus in their families, and we have empathy for them. And I'm elevating my own vibrational state and being in joy and moving forward and having, like, a blast being here with you with zero guilt. And so when you take a stand for the. And it will encompass. It usually encompasses the predicament that we think we've gotten ourselves into because we thought we had to choose what.
Is something coming up for you right now that you are really either working through or focusing on? Are you noticing that, like, as you wrote your book, you're falling under a certain archetype?
Like, you know, it's so amazing to me how much, like, you know, you think you've done the work on it. You write a book and you're, like, rather proud, like, you know, like you've graduated on some level.
Yep, I can relate.
And then it's. The lessons are staring you in the face. So. Yes. So one of the archetypes in the book I talk about is the loner. And this was, like, very much me for just so much of my life and even so much of, like, the beginning of my career that I was just this sort of, like, Lone Ranger. And it's. Whatever, it doesn't matter. So the loner is an archetype where I thought I had to do everything on my own and it wasn't okay to ask for help or safe to reach out or be in community and all that. I mean, I didn't say that out loud. I just thought, like, I didn't need community as much as those other girls kind of thing. And I was like, okay, well, now I've got this great friendship circle. Like, check it off the list. Like, I've graduated. And then when my book tour got canceled, I realized, oh, okay, we're going to pivot. We're going to do a virtual book tour. That's going to be great. I reached out to, like, my comfort zone level of friends. Like, hey, will you have me on your podcast? Hey, can I do an IG Takeover? And then came the next level. I was like, oh, will you introduce me to your friend who has a podcast? Will you, like, you know, and, like, the thought, Lori, of, like, asking for help, like, I couldn't believe. How can, like, you know, like, the queen of, like, get great at receiving, you know, is what so much of the message of the book is about. And I had to really, like, breathe through. Like, I. There was, like, somewhat. This was yesterday, by the way. Like, I had sat there and looked at my phone for 12 minutes before I sent a text asking for this introduction. And I was like, gina, like, I'm actually cool if it happens or if it doesn't. Like, it was more just like, the asking for help. And I was like, come on, Queen, get your. Adjust that crown, will you? And so I think the loner has appeared a little bit. And, you know, I always grapple a bit with little Miss Perfect. Like, I've come a long way with my own disease to please and, like, needing people to like me. But to say that that's completely eradicated, that would be a lie. So I think that's another one that's popped up as well.
Oh, my God. Thank you for sharing that. I so, so relate. And I know that I know majority of the people on this podcast relate in a major way. And it's, you know, life just works so interesting, right? Especially for people who kind of relate to that loner. I completely resonate more than I could possibly Tell you it can feel. It's like life is completely. It thrives and lives and your dream thrives and lives off of connection.
Like, 100%.
You really can't build anything, create anything, or have any fun without, like, that connection in the end, like, having that as a large piece of your life. So. And I think that people who gravitate towards entrepreneurship can tend to be more isolating and more of a loner. But there's so much to offer us with connection, especially within our business. So what have you, like, let's talk a little bit into asking and what that looks like from the queen standpoint of asking and being confident, maybe without being too pushy or with being pushy. Like, what does that actually. Like what. What does it feel like? What does it look like when you first do it? How do we get better at it?
Yes. So, first of all, zero push is needed. And I'm a doer and a hustler and I don't have any story around that, but zero push is needed and really being a queen. So first of all, you come from an abundant mindset, and if there are 7.8 billion people in the world and there's infinite possibilities, chances are, whatever it is you're going for, love, money, connections, business, up level, whatever it is, like, it's available. Like, can we, like, if we get out of the mindset of lack and there's not enough money or clients or whatever it is you're going for, like, queen has an abundant mindset. Like, the right matches are there for you. And what I have found in my reach out, like, more than ever, it's gotten to be about genuine relationship. Like, like really, like, it's gotta feel just yummy. And so, like, I. And I'll notice even in my own body, like, you know, do I want to pitch myself for that podcast or ask for that interest? Like, there's like, the. Getting out of your comfort zone is one thing, which is different than, like, it's like, not the right fit. And so I've. I've gone and knocked on a whole bunch of doors recently, and, like 90% of them, they're just flinging open. Yes, how can I help you? Who can I introduce you to? Here's this introduction link, and it's just been a love fest, and it's been joy, and it's been like, just this, like, fun like you were talking about. Like, it's like, it hasn't felt like work. And then I've gotten, you know, probably about 10% of the doors Kind of slammed in my face with, like, the. Just, no, not interested. Ghosting, like, whatever. Yep. And so the princess in me in years past would have been like, oh, like, I would have either gotten pissed and, like, gone and, like, convince them to, like, you know, change their decision just for the sake of it. I am Sicilian, by the way, says have been like, what do you mean? Or totally dwelled on the one person who I barely even knew who said it wasn't the right fit at this time, when, like, you know, the nine other people who were like, love you and what you're doing and, like, all that. And so this time I haven't taken the princess realm. Like, I've just really been like, awesome, great. This is a fit. Yes, let's do it. It's not a fit if it's, like, easily. No. Next, let's move on. And it's just been this really, like, taking zero things personally, only looking for the sweet spot of connection. Like, where are messages really matching up? Or where are the personality styles? Like, really, like, just a yes and just, like. And then quickly moving on, moving on, moving on. Because there's just so much genuine good opportunity for everyone right now.
Oh, man. I just have to go back to, like, tell me about what a queen does around taking things personally.
Oh, well, a queen doesn't take things personally. The princess does. Yes. And the queen is just so committed to her vision. There's just such a wisdom to her, and she's just always seeking the yes. Like, where is the right connection? Knowing with certainty that one of the chapters is called the sexiness of Certainty. It's like knowing with certainty that her good, her platform, her people, her money, her resources, whatever, they are absolutely there. And it's just this joyful adventure to go and discover where they are. And when you get to know that, that's just where they're not.
So, Gina, are there things that we can be doing around kind of like manifesting knowing that we can trust that we're going to end up where we need to be? Because in the beginning, for myself and. And for, you know, I know people who are listening to this, they're like, they don't even know where to begin trusting. Because sometimes it can be a totally new area. Maybe they're starting a new business, and it's like, where do we separate the doing from the hey, this is, you know, I'm manifesting. I'm making sure that I'm. My energy's high and all of those things. Like, how do we know what do we do for manifesting and how much doing do we need to do?
Yes. Okay. So I will share with you what I do. And do not be fooled by its simplicity. This stuff works. And you may have even heard some of this before. And do not glaze over like you've heard this before. Like, success is about repetition. Stay with me. The first thing is you get clear on your vision. And it's got to be a vision, not what you think you can do, but what really excites you. And at first you can go and do like a broad brush vision of like what you like, you know, all the, all the stuff you want to do and all the money you want to make and all that, that's great. But then you get clear on your vision for the next 90 days. And so wherever we're at in the calendar, whenever I do this, like sometimes it's not even a full 90 days. It's just like, you know, whenever the next quarter ends, that's the next 90 days, whether you have six weeks or 12 weeks or whatever it is. Because what I find is that when you function in the container of the calendar, so the calendar is the masculine, that's meant to be in service to the feminine. The feminine is your vision. And so when you don't give yourself too much space to kind of fake yourself out, like you're gonna do something, then when there's not that space, you're like confronted with needing to up level, move the needle, push your edge, whatever it is, every single day. So what I've done, we're talking here now. So like by the end of quarter two, which is by the end of June, I have a very specific vision of a concrete and tangible goal, a couple of them that I will manifest. And then with that vision, I go and I work backwards. And then it's like, what needs done by the end of May, and then what needs done by the end of April, when you dial it in that specifically, then you almost have your marching orders by the week. Like, what needs accomplished by each week? And then this becomes your outline and your bible that you live by. And when it's this short of a time period, like, and you chunk it down, then you can see like, okay, wait, was I trying to stuff too much in this quarter? Like, does this particular dream need to move to quarter three? Because I'm just going to focus on, you know what, like the one dream is. So you've got like a queen. She doesn't overreach and she doesn't under reach. Like she like really, she gets to her edge. So I think some people set the bar so low that if they just like take a step, they're like feel victorious and like it's such a false sense of their own personal power. And then some people that the bar just so high it's not even humanly possible to accomplish that amount in a certain amount of time. So a queen has a really beautiful relationship with time. And that's an art to be perfected. And so then you go and you do it and you do it with a mentality of no matter what. And that doesn't mean working 18 hours a day and blowing out your adrenals. It really gets you in the position of, is this a non negotiable? Is this a non negotiable? Like is this a want or is this a must? Because we all know if wanting would work, we'd all be skinny billionaires by now. So wanting doesn't do anything. Wanting doesn't count. It's got to be a must. And when something is a must for you, there is no stopping you. You're going to like attract resources that you didn't even know to attract. You're going to literally be witnessing miracles before your eyes. You're going to experience the quantum leap like it will happen when it, it must happen for you.
Oh, I love that. And I'm telling you just with you saying that even it just makes me realize it's so much about you can think you're clear and then if you, here's what you can do. Like to know if you're clear or not. Have somebody ask you what your actual vision is like, can you explain it? Can you give them a timeline? Like that is so powerful because anything that I've ever done is because I've had an actual timeline, deadlines, a plan, and let me tell you, the manifesting and the leaning in and the faith will all get to be practiced within that plan. Is there something right now that is just like really testing this for you? Do you have a big vision?
Obviously I'm sure, but well, yes. And so one of the opportunities of this moment is there are a couple of kind of what I considered bucket list dreams for me, career wise that I had pushed off. And when I'm done writing my book and when I'm done with the book launch and like it was kept, like I kept sort of pushing it off and justifying it and that whole thing. And you know this for what these particular dreams are like, literally like all the space has just been Cleared like the universe clearly wanted me implementing them now. So what I thought was like a, if anything, end of 2020, maybe 2021 goal is probably going to, well, at least going to get launched by the end of quarter two. So it's really moved up a timeline on something that I have been saying I've wanted to do for six months now.
Ah, so exciting. Can you share it or no?
Sure, I know. And here's the other thing too. So what I'm about to say is not going to be like, Laurie, you're not going to fall off your chair. But it's. Well, I'll share why it's a big deal to me. So I have always functioned in. My programs and services have always been very high end. It was like I love luxury. So I was very much like the luxury brand of personal development. Especially when Internet marketing came out, I was like, what is this stuff? I just want to transform lives. So I was like, super high touch, low tech. Yep. And so I've always worked within like, what? At the beginning it was the dozens that then moved into the hundreds. And then I would like watch other women who are like servicing thousands. And it was like, so I'm glad to share this transparently if it can help anyone. So I would like somehow make me wrong. Like, why is there stuff better than mine? And it was like, if people would say to me, because your stuff isn't $7, Gina. Like, I wasn't comparing the business model. I was only comparing like the mass following. And so it was like, I didn't see it just because I had, I had this story that like, I couldn't serve the masses in the thousands, that I was like designated with the hundred. And like, like, and I was like, I must have an upper limit. And I was like, you know, doing like my own coaching. I'm like, what breakthrough do I need? My coach was like, you just need a business model that makes sense for the masses, Gina. And I was like, oh yeah. Like, it didn't dawn on me. So my big desire is to have a membership site that is in service to the thousands. And so that's what I'm going to be launching in June. So I will. So that's so cool, Gina.
That is like, you just dropped so much gold there. Like, I don't even think you realized how vital that was for people to hear because there's so many. I know a lot of people who are doing lower end programs who they don't think they're worth charging more even though they have Tons of people doing lower end programs or vice versa, like, they just, they don't even know where to start. But what you said was, you know, I just don't have a plan for this. And getting a plan and learning about a plan is literally everything. Like, if people, so many people who are like, oh my God, I could never do like a higher end coaching or small group, even though that's what I would like to do, I'd like to spend maybe a little less time and just, you know, get more intimate with people. I hear that a lot actually. And they, they've never like done coaching, like high end coaching, and they don't even know what it would look like. I'm like, okay, here's the thing. It's not as in, like, it's not as crazy as you think. Like, first of all, if you knew what it looked like and you did get a plan, just like exactly what you said, a lot of it is because we're just not looking at it and we're not getting ourself, like, we're not immersing ourself in it. We're not educating ourself around it.
Like, exactly.
Oh my God, it's so powerful to see it.
Yes, yes. And, you know, so I'm happy. So we create these stories, right? And so for whatever reason, I created a story that I could sell high end packages. Did it years ago. I crossed seven figures selling 12 $100,000 packages. This one I had a list of 5,000 and, you know, wasn't super well known, but I just had a belief in me, the universe and the quality of that level of work. But I didn't have a belief that I could have 5,000 people in a membership site. Right. And so it's like we create these stories and like it's really about proximity and you don't, you know, and tribe and getting close. So then what happens when the student's ready to teach their peers? So who does, who do I get introduced to? Natalie Ellis. You know, it's like, then I'm having lunch with her and I was like, like, just like, is this really possible? Like, you know, it's like she has one and it's like, why do you think the universe would put her in my path?
Yes.
That wasn't what my next step was supposed to be when I'd already been thinking about it and wondering if it was possible. So it's really about all of us getting that vision, like what would really, really thrill you and having the timeline and committing to it. Like from this no matter what place, remembering that if it's humanly possible for someone else, it's possible for you.
Oh my God. I just, like, I just grabbed a little like, sentence that you said that I'm going to use all the time in my head. So thank you for that. You said, why would she be in my past thinking everything is for you? Right? Like, I have so many women that have come into my life lately and I'm like, well, of course she's here. Like, why do you think she's here? It's because this is your next layer instead of. Cause sometimes we can get a little caught up, right? Like, oh, like maybe, you know, when you first meet Natalie and you find out about how many people are on her membership or whatever, that looks like you're like, oh, God. Like, I could never. It can either reinforce your old belief or you can lean into. Well, why else would she be here? The only reason that this person would be put on my path is to, like, divinely connect with them and be shown what I'm supposed to do.
Yes, yes, yes. And if we just keep saying yes to our dreams and start asking, like, what if it were possible? What if it were for your people who want to sell high end packages? Like, what if it were possible to sell whatever they want, 10, 25, 50, $100,000 packages? Like, start asking the questions you want the answers to.
Oh my God, yes. So what do you think that we are missing? Like, what's a question we should be asking you?
I.
When it comes to like manifesting or creating what we want, how.
How is it possible? I think like, if. When we just really start asking, like, how is it possible? Because we spend so much time in the default mode of I can't or I could never, or it would never work for me. But like, if we just really. One night I was spinning on something, I don't remember what it was, and my. And my husband wakes up and he's like, what's with you? And I was like spinning on some fear based thought and he's like, if you're gonna be up exerting that much energy on something, why don't you spin on something that you actually want to happen? Oh my God, yes, good point.
You're like, dang it, why are you right, right now?
Right? And so it's like, if we just start. Really, like you said, lean into it. Like, ask, Ask God, ask the universe to, to bring you examples of it. Like, and to start to. I think for all of us women too, to start to hold ourselves at a higher level. You know, we have been given so much. So much smart, so much potential, so much gumption, so much passion, so much, if you're listening to this podcast, so much opportunity, the fact that we have access to technology and this level of information. And so let's just start giving ourselves our destiny and God a lot more credit and just spend the time and the energy fulfilling our dreams rather than convincing ourselves that we can't.
I love that. So I want to know just a little bit more about your book before we wrap up here. So tell me the power of the archetypes. Like, why is that so useful to know? Does it help us in our relationships? Does it help us with us? How is this gonna help us?
Yeah, well, basically, it helps our ego, to be honest, because it's really. It's really hard to take an honest look at ourselves when we think it's us. But when you read about the archetypes, they're like this, like, external entity. They're like these other little characters. And when they can reveal, they kind of more gently reveal our lower vibrational, which isn't everyone, you know, ways of being or thinking or behaving. And then when we have the archetype of Queen and we've got the vision for what the queen looks like within us, it's so much easier to step into that. Or you can be like, I don't want to look like the saboteur. I don't want to look like the sleep girl. You know, you're like, I'll take Queen. And it's a. It gives the brain a visual of something to choose and to step into.
Oh, man, that's so powerful. I need to read the archetype of the queen. For sure. I will be doing that after this, for sure. But something that you just said, and it's so true. I have, you know, throughout my life, been able to kind of. Like you said, it's like a character to look at either ways that I'm being or a choice that's in front of me and be like, oh, I know a character like that in my life, and I know how that character always plays out. Like, I know the end if I become that character. So I think that that can help so much with decision making. Because you know how it's going to play out if you're the princess, right? Like, you know, you're gonna. It's not gonna be great for you.
Yeah, well, you're gonna have a lot of disappointment. So it's yeah. Are you more committed to the disappointment or the glory?
Yes. Oh, my gosh. Well, Gina, I could talk to you all freaking day long. Oh, my God, that's so much fun. You're just like, so much wisdom drenched in so much fun. My favorite type of person. So with that said, I just want to say thank you so much for how just you are, like, nonstop service out in the world. And I'm telling you, you have been in my sphere over and over and over again. I just see you so much online, all of the time serving, and everything that anyone who knows you has ever said is that you are just, like, wise. You are such a light and. And you do the do like you are a doer, which I absolutely love and admire and just so grateful for people out there who are like you. So thank you so much for coming on the podcast and I would love for people to know where they can get your book.
Oh, thank you, Lori. And I mean, just talk about such an inspiration, role model, just generous soul and so transparent. Obviously, I've been watching you for years, and it's just beautiful to witness your journey. And I'm only disappointed that you did not call me for taste testing on this situation.
Oh, girl, it's coming.
You're gonna have to make up for that.
I'll make up for it. I'll send you a box.
Great. You can go to divineliving.com book and you can get the Audible, the Kindle, or the hardcover there. So if you go to divineliving.com book and if you want the free companion course, the one that I was referring to, that we did for absolutely free, you can go to divineliving.com audacity and you'll get the videos and workbooks and all the cool stuff in there.
Okay, we will link that all up. And where can we follow you on Insta? What's your handle?
Ginadivi?
All right, you guys, so one massive gift that you can give our guest, and it's just a great refresher for you, is to upload to your Insta stories, the podcast, and tag her and myself and let her know what your biggest takeaway was like if you had an aha moment or there was just something that really stuck with you that she said. We would love to see it. I would love to share your stories or text this to a friend. Like, if you know a friend right now who is struggling or maybe needs a little bit of insight on her purpose or decision making, this could truly, truly help her. So you guys, so grateful for you always. And until next time, earn your happy. Bye everyone. Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the Earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought and honest comment. Tell us what you think, tell us what you want to hear more of. It would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again guys. Bye Bye.
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