612. Q+A: Leap of Faith

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Your character will shine through. And it might take six months or it might take a year, but people will start saying, oh my God, this person over here is like this. And we see that you're like this.

Welcome to the Earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author. Each Week, I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul, and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business, and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves, get ready to earn, own, and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me?

Here we go. Evans, welcome back to your own personal podcast.

Wow. Thank you.

How does it feel to be the co host of a show that just reaches hundreds of millions of people a day?

A true gift. Hundreds of millions of listeners right now tuning in.

Yes. Okay.

So how are you?

I've missed your face. When can I see your dog?

Oh, my gosh. You have to see June. She's really cute and gotten so big.

Is she with you right now?

She's. I put her in the other room and gave her a bone because she gets. She's a little excited in the mornings.

Oh, yeah, that's right. That's like the whole. People are like, can I see him? I'm like, you don't understand what it would take for me to go and get this dog out of what I just created for the last 20 minutes. No, you absolutely cannot see this animal.

That's exactly it.

It's see the animal or stop what we're doing. What do you.

Yeah, like, the whole routine, it's just a thing.

It is a serious thing. And doodles have so much energy. Is she okay? So is she showing early signs of being a chewer or being like, what are.

What's her personality?

She's very stubborn.

Oh, no.

Yeah, like, she'll just be on a walk and then sit down and stare at me. And I'm like, okay, no, we're gonna keep. Keep going.

Oh, that's so hard. Waffles got stubborn towards the end, and I was like, oh, no, you didn't.

It reminds me of Waffles. She reminds me of Waffles in her little stubborn like. Because Waffles would do that when I took her on walks. You remember?

Oh, my God. Maybe Waffles came back as her.

That's what I told my mom. That I'm like, mom, maybe Waffles, like, gave her a little sprinkle.

You know, I think that Bananas has a little sprinkle of waffles as well. I'm just like. Sometimes I'm like, waffles, stop it.

It's the best. How have you been, you guys Just went to a really. You guys had a really cool Mastermind.

Oh my goodness, it was so cool. We went to Under Canvas in the Grand Canyon and it is like you're under canvas. It's like a bougie camping, but it was 35 degrees at night. So with you guys it's just a tarp. So literally it's not warm. But there's wood heaters in your thing. So wood stove. So you have to wake up three times a night to put wood in your stove. And a couple of nights we only did it like once and we woke up and we were like, you have to like set your alarm to make sure that you don't lose like an ear or something in the middle of the night. But.

Wow.

Yeah.

And it was.

And they're like. And it's tarantula season, so just keep your eyes open. I was like, okay. Oh. So yes, it's bougie camping, but it's also like, you can imagine some of the Mastermind members checking in and hearing that. They were just like, okay, great. But it was so much fun, like fireside chats and amazing, you know, tended dinners and like, oh, I've never seen stars like that in my entire life. And I'm from upper Michigan.

Yeah, that's amazing. You don't really see stars in la. I mean, you see stars.

So funny when I literally. It's funny. I was on the. I was on a walk and I was on the phone with Jackie, my sister in law, sort of. And. And I'm like, oh, hold on. Someone's asking me for directions. So I look over and I'm like, only in LA does celebrity stop to ask you for directions. And you're like, okay. So it was one of the guys from Avengers and he's like, where's Farmica? And I'm like, it's over here. But that happens all the time. I know. You know that, like, I'll look up and I'm like, oh, my God. Here's the, here's the list of people who have pet my dog while I'm walking. Ted Danson, Pamela Anderson, Reese Witherspoon and her daughter. And they'll. They'll just like be like, oh, cute. And petting. They were petting waffles. And I'm like, oh, my God. This is like crazy living here. Because, you know, you just see. Especially where we are, you just see them all the time. Yeah. So anyway, who's your list of exciting celebs that you've seen?

Helen Hunt. Remember her? And Twister.

I've seen her, too, at a beach shop.

I love her.

She's so. She's so, like, naturally pretty.

She is. She must live right by us.

She must. I've seen her in True Food. And we were like, there's Helen. Hi. But then we were quiet, and then.

You stopped and you were like, now what? I know it's a really weird thing of, like. You have this urge to, like, go and satisfy your craving of something. You don't even know what it is because you actually wouldn't want to go over and say hi. But then you just, like, kind of stare the whole time. You're like, should I take a picture? Should I just, like, enjoy this moment and be present? Should I observe them?

Exactly. Wait. Do you know who I saw one time in Yalls neighborhood?

Who?

Steve Gutenberg. Remember? Police Academy. The Police Academy.

Oh, my God.

Yes.

He totally lives in Yalls neighborhood.

Well, I can't wait for that moment. Wait, was he on Father of the or not? Three Men and a Little lady too.

Yes.

That's so funny. Chris has seen him. Okay. Yep. He might. We just see the same ones because they live here. All right. So how's life been?

Honestly? I had a heart to heart with my dentist yesterday, and I didn't even know it, but she's a therapist, apparently.

I mean, is she a therapist or is she just kind of like a dentist who can moonlight as a therapist?

She was a moonlighter. Well, it was actually the hygienist. I have. I have to confess, and I want to share this because I feel like I'm not the only one. I had not had my teeth cleaned in two years, Lori. Two years.

I've gone on a longer streak than that.

So I was so disappointed in myself, and my gums have not been feeling great. And I went in and I told Linda, the hygienist, and she was like, it's bad in here. And she told me, she was like, you've got to start taking better care of yourself. I can tell you haven't been doing it and you've got to start now.

Oh, my gosh. And you're like, she doesn't even know how much this applies in areas of my life. So what are some ways that you feel like you can take care of yourself? Like when. When she said that, did that just, like, hit you and be like, oh, I should take care of myself in other areas?

A hundred percent? Because even with brushing your teeth, I know this sounds ridiculous, but I'm always, like, doing that and something Else. And it's like maybe just brush your teeth.

Yeah. So you only ever brush like the four front teeth.

Exactly. And she's like, what are you like, who taught you how to brush?

Like, I don't know, you're like, I'm on the phone. Okay. Do you have important calls like me?

And that's the thing. I like, it's not that important. Right. You should be. You need to separate. I feel like I've been letting work take a lot of my time and you. I'm not doing a good job of being like, actually I need to have this for myself right now. Just like going on a walk or.

Uh huh. And you'll do so much better because when you then it makes you start to resent work when you don't put yourself first and it's like you don't show up the way that you want. So I so get that. Like there are times where I'm like, stop. You need to go and just do something else or you're going to start resenting what you're doing. So. Oh my God. Okay, what's your quote?

Oh, my quote, it's. Oh, I didn't even know I picked this. Only in the darkness can you see the stars. Martin Luther King.

Oh my gosh, how beautiful is that? That's funny. I feel like that happens a lot. That's really cool. Okay, mine is Kurt von Gutt. Enjoy the little things in life for one day you'll look back and realize they were the big things. I love that, love that. Just think of that all the time. When I'm like. When you're waiting for something big or you're wanting something else to happen, I'm like, actually it's about this and to like drop into that space because sometimes we can feel so in expectation, which can also be a good thing. But also don't miss you know, what's all around you because you're in expectation and waiting. Because sometimes life can happen and you realize that those moments of waiting were actually the really good moments. So I love that. Do you have a review of the week?

Yeah, this is from Unique Pivot and they say I never would have known. Hi Lori. I recently started listening to podcasts as I'm the only. I'm on the road of self improvement. I listened to the podcast of your interview on the Ashley Hand show. I love her too. I was at the. Oh wait, I think we've read this review before. Have we? The one where she was at your fitness competition.

Oh, that's right. Yes, hey, you know what? That was a nice little, Nice little ditty refresher. Thanks for that. That's really cool.

We just wanted to give her another shout out.

We did. Do we need to go into questions or did you have another one?

Yeah, we'll go into questions now.

That sounds great. Let's do it.

This is from. I have a review called you're awesome. That's our review.

That's the review. Guess what, Everyone listening?

Thanks for your review in your head.

This question is from Jordan Elise. And Jordan wants to know, how do you eliminate feelings of resentment and rise above them without suppressing them? Oh, like, kind of keeping it all inside.

Yeah, I think you eliminate it by two things. You decide if it's worth a conversation and sharing how you feel. Deal with that person and setting, setting boundaries. Like, is it a relationship you want to keep in your life? Then you need to show up for your life and set boundaries and have that conversation. Or if it's somebody who does not respect you and will not respect a boundary or change or any of those things, you have to make peace with the fact that it's, it's not going to end the way that you want, but you're going to set that boundary anyway and you're gonna, you're gonna do all that you can to not resent yourself for not showing up like, or for doing the work that you need to get done. And there's really only two decisions with that. And then the work will all be around making peace with your final decision of whatever it is that's going on. So, you know, if it's a friendship who just kind of uses you or something like that and never kind of respects you or walks all over you and doesn't return favors or appreciate you, that's the place where you have to decide, do I have this conversation or do I just say, hey, you know, I've asked you multiple times. I love you. I, I, I would love to move on with this relationship, but it doesn't seem like you are willing to look at how I'm feeling. And then you make peace with the idea or the fact that you're not going to be friends anymore. And that's going to take some work, it's going to take some healing. It's probably going to take some, you know, they'll probably stir up a tornado, a frenzy of things. Such as they might talk about you, they might be pissed at you. They might, you know, get people to try to not like you. And if you don't put fuel on that fire, it will eventually go away. And that's where people I find usually go wrong. And that's where I've gone wrong in the past is like trying to find a way to get them to see my side or write letters, do phone calls, like say I'm so sorry, oh my God. Try to talk to all the people that they're talking to negatively about me. Please don't do that. Please. Your character will shine through and it might take six months or it might take a year, but people will start saying, oh my God, this person over here is like this. And we see that you're like this. So it will all come to fruition. But please do not throw propane on that by trying to apologize or trying to change it. So I don't know if that's the situation, but that's typically things that can arise from it. So yeah, that's how I feel. Do you want one more? Yeah, let's do another question.

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Okay, this is from Rocks. Ooh, cool. When you're starting a new brand, how do you find your support drive?

Oh, this is so good. I think you both find it and I think you both build it. So when you're starting a new brand, you look at other people, you look at people who've done it before you who potentially are have programs or coaching programs that could help you. So I would definitely say I don't know how to tell you to create something without eventually investing or investing right away. And you know there's going to be people who help you with your. What does she do again? Or what'd she say? Oh, starting a new brand.

Starting a new brand. Yeah.

There will be different levels of people that you can get help from at this point that you could spend money on. So you, here's the thing is if you have a little bit of cash or you can, you know, find some it, get something, an investment to be able to invest into what you're doing, you'll save yourself so much time and money. So with that said, the first step I would do is try to find a coach. That's what I've always done. Even if it's like, you know, a lower priced coach. So you might want that really fancy high price coach, but you can't afford that person yet unless you can. So with that, that said, I would absolutely first find a coach and then that's like your initial tribe probably will be there because they're, they'll also either be investing in that program or coach and then from there, so you'll get the co. The supportive help around what you're doing and get like people who can also hold you accountable. And then from there you'll also go and try to find your peers, whether it's on Instagram or whether it's on Facebook or whatever that is. And you'll start to just network, like have conversations, ask somebody if they ever would want to be accountability partners. Like once a month, you know, for 30 minutes each, where you just talk about all the things that you need. Maybe you put together an accountability group like that your group is going to take work. They're not just going to show up and friends don't come overnight. You're going to get a lot of no's and you're gonna feel super rejected sometimes. And then you'll get someone randomly who'll come along and remind you that there's still people who, or that there's people who want to connect with you out there. But it's so much work and it's so worth it is what I want to tell people. So, Evan.

So yeah, you just have to put in that effort.

Yes.

So it's kind of like even if you're not building a brand, even if you're just like, oh, I'm moving to a new city and I've decided I want to be this kind of person or hang out with this kind of.

Group that's healthier or whatever Million this is, this is the same across the board for like friendships. And I know that we are both, you know, going to be moving and going into new like areas of making new friends.

So we're going to be in this all over again.

Oh, that's going to be fun to talk about.

It's going to be really fun. We're going to have a lot of things to talk about within like the next two months. So, so exciting. Did you find a review or are we just going to wear? Are we going to give each other reviews?

We're going to give each other reviews.

Okay. That is so awesome. Here's what, here's what I want to say. If you were in my office and you were in for a friend review, I would say, I wish that you could see the type of friend that you were, because you would just look in the mirror and, like, throw your hair around and be like a Pantene commercial.

Whoa.

I'm going to.

I'm. I'm going to write that down. My review is that you're a strong, beautiful butterfly about to embark on your journey that you didn't even know that it was gonna be as cool as it's gonna be.

I'm gonna write that down. We should do this more often. In fact, we should just make the whole podcast this. And I feel like people would really love that. So. Okay. So beautiful. I mean, I just feel like we. I poured so much wisdom into people today, I think.

So just go spread those wings, everyone.

Everyone spread those wings. All right. Until next time, be questionably awesome.

Bye, Evans.

Bye, everyone. Thank you guys so much for spending.

This time with me on the earn your happy podcast. I am am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought, an honest comment. Tell us what you think, tell us.

What you want to hear more of.

It would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again, guys.

Bye. Bye.