655. 2021 Expectation Hangover

So sitting in resistance of like, this didn't happen and I'm not doing this and I'm so behind on this and oh my God, I have all of this pressure and I need to launch this company instead of sitting in that because that's just massive resistance. I said, what if this was happening for me?

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Here we go. Foreign. Welcome back to the earn your happy podcast. And it's time for another quickie because there's always time to fit in inspiration. And this is my first quickie of the new year because I have been crazy sick. So that brings me to exactly what the topic of this podcast is today. You guys, I hope that your new year is going awesome, but if it's to going, going like a massive shit sandwich with some good things in the middle like mine is, then I want to help you reframe because you guys know that literally all of my greatest lessons in my life and all of the good things typically come from me reframing things that did not go my way or from things that have gone wrong or some of my biggest life perspective shifts are from things that maybe are traumatic or, you know, were really tough learning lessons. So that's what this podcast is, talking through all of that shit. So I just want to talk about the massive expectation hangover of starting a new year for me, especially since we did start off sick. I did not get to do my yearly planning, which I've done every single year for the past 11 years. So first of all, thrown out of ritual, having my grandmother pass away, all three of us, Chris's mom, myself getting coronavirus, and my dog having a seizure and not being able to work for two solid weeks. So it was really not starting out exactly how I planned. I had these great expectations of wanting to do these planning sessions and hit the ground running in 2021, when in fact I was hitting the couch, watching Netflix, binging on every series because I couldn't even, like, think straight. Literally having to nap pretty pretty much all afternoons for days on end. Great news. I feel much better. It is 14 days later, and today's the first day that I actually feel like myself. Now, some business did happen in there, but what immediately happened is the first week I struggled because let's talk about an expectation, and let's talk about an expectation hangover. So I just looked up the definition of expectation, and it's a belief that someone will or should achieve something. Well, I had so many ideas of what I should be doing, and when all of them came crashing down and turned into a massive dumpster fire, I really had to let go and surrender and decide that perhaps some of this could be happening for me. And the belief that has always pulled me through is to stop resisting. Like, you guys know I talk about this a lot where the resistance of the thing is actually worse than the thing. So sitting in resistance of, like, this didn't happen and I'm not doing this, and I'm so behind on this. And, oh, my God, I have all of this pressure and I need to launch this company instead of sitting in that. Cause that's just massive resistance. I said, what if this was happening for me? What would. Like, what would that thing be that could be happening for me? And I thought, okay, you know what? I desperately have been needing to research co packers. Like, I need to do that a lot more. And when am I ever gonna find time to sit on the couch for days and learn about this industry? Like, when can I get. Like, when will I have time to really become an expert in some of this arena? Which by no means am I an expert yet. That would take a lot of time and a lot of training. But I certainly did have time to sit there and mindlessly, like, kind of search and learn all of these different things about my company. And I ended up finding out so many incredible things. I ended up finding so many, so many answers. And I also said, you know what? I'm going to just pray really strong prayers during this time. So I said the prayer of, like, full surrender. I was like, God, I'm fully surrendering to you. Like, I know that my network is strong. I know that there's probably people in my network who could help me please start to reveal these people to me and also help me show up in a way that lets them know that I need help. So that's exactly what I did. I started asking for more help online. I started. Started sharing exactly what I was doing online, even if my day wasn't going how I wanted, like, hey, this is what I'm looking for. Hey, this is what I'm researching. And you guys would not believe the people who said, hey, my friend does this, or my friend is in the wine industry or have you looked at this company? I know that my friend works for them. We are pushing so much every day that we forget that sometimes some things are happening to us to slow us down and rethink the way that we actually do things. So that's just the question that I want to pose to you today is where are you going out and thinking that you need to create things or you should be doing this right or something should be happening because it's that expectation and where can you say where could I actually step back and like think of something in a completely different way? Like if something's not going your way or you're not finding an answer or you're not finding the person that you need to be connected who could do the thing that maybe you need done in your business? How could you think of it in a completely different way and look at it through the lens of in a way that you have not been looking before?

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And that's really what ended up happening is I can't show up and respond and act in the way that I have been because I just don't have the energy for it. What if I decided that this actually happened for me so that I make things easier on myself because I could only do the bare minimum and I thought, you know what would be the best bare minimum? The best bare minimum would be to ask for help. Like instead of going and researching all on my own and trying to outreach to all these different companies alone, what if I actually asked the network that I have so that these answers could be brought to me and that was 100% the ticket. So whatever problem you're trying to solve, it's most likely not getting solved because you're not coming at it from enough different angles. Maybe you haven't asked somebody to look at your problem because you think no one will want to help you. But the problem is, is that nothing gets solved without other people. You have to go and reach out to your network and ask. You have to proclaim what you are up to and what you're doing at all times or your problem will never be solved. So if you have a problem that you're trying to solve and you're trying to solve it alone, the problem will never get solved. The problems that we do not share are the problems that we keep forever. So if you want that problem solved, you better start telling people, everyone. Even if you're ashamed of it, even if you think you should know and people think you should know the answer, do not let ego be your greatest overhead. Go out and ask you guys. It is crazy what happens when you have to, right? Sometimes the best thing that could possibly happen to us is for us to be put up against a wall where our only decision is to be strong. So I'm sending you guys so much love today. I'm so glad to be feeling somewhat back to myself, just beyond grateful for you. And let me know if you had any aha moments during this podcast because I would love, love, love to hear what you took away and how you're going to be looking at your problem through a different lens and if this helped you out with anything. So until next time, earn your happy. Bye everyone.

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