666. Q&A: Consistency & Greed
10 Feb 2021 · 34 min
Lori Harder and Evans answer listener questions about staying consistent with social media and overcoming greed. For consistency, they suggest scheduling tools like Plannable and a repeatable weekly structure. For greed, they frame it as rooted in feeling like something's missing and recommend finding satisfying creative pursuits instead.
Chapters
Greed just comes from lack of you feeling like you are not enough in some way. Welcome to the earn your happy podcast. I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author. Each week I'll bring you a guest or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves, get ready to earn, own and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go, Evans. Welcome back to another episode of questionably awesome where we're going to answer the questions from the peoples and we're going to make it awesome.
I love this. Thanks you so much for having me on your show.
Thanks you. Thanks you.
I'm already up to a great start.
Thanks you everyone. We should add S's after everything that we do. By the way, there's my email notification. We if you've never listened to this podcast, it seems very, very professional. Yeah, you're not going to get that from this particular episode. How many people do you think land on these episodes first on my podcast and are like, I love them?
Pretty much all of them.
Pretty much everyone. Yeah. So, you know, we got interview style on here. We got Evans and I talking about ridiculousness. And you know what's crazy though? I really do think sometimes the most wise things come out of our mouth with no, zero intention. I feel like the universe is really looking out for us. And they're like, look, if they don't drop some sort of something smart, this podcast is going to go up in flames. And then out of the blue, we get something literally life changing that could potentially be in the Webster's dictionary. And did you have a Webster's dictionary growing up?
Oh, yeah. Remember how you had to buy one for school? You had to have a dictionary for school back in the day.
Oh my gosh. Like, I literally used to sit and like, read some of the words in the Webster's dictionary and like read definitions and we would sit around. You did like, no, this was not often. I was not a smart kid. I did it more for entertainment. So. Yeah. But isn't this crazy that you. So now if someone's talking and I hear a word that I don't know, I Google it right away because I'm like, I Just am always curious when there's a new word. We had to. You had to just not know. And then you had to like, either jot it down in a notepad because you didn't have an iPhone and I didn't carry a notepad around. Did you?
No, No, I didn't carry a notepad around. I wish I had them.
Had.
Of course.
That.
That doesn't make sense. I don't know.
I wish I had them.
I wish I had them.
I mean, please bring those Southern roots in wherever you can. I want to know all the Southern words. I really do. You know what I think is so cool? When I went and spoke in the south for a couple bananas, just kicked the door open, like, all pissed. Like, who do you think you are half closing this door? Come on in, buddy. Come on. Sorry I closed you out of the. Out of the fun. Whenever we would go speak down there for like our network marketing events, like, we had some team down there, we'd be in a hotel and they would, like, leave us a gift. Like our team would send a gift to the hotel and it would always have some sort of amazing bourbon in it. Or what's the other drink? Like, whiskey or bourbon? Oh, yeah.
Whiskey, bourbon. Sweet tea.
So good, so good. It really is like just Southern honey, you know?
You know there's a sweet tea flavored vodka. There is. Wait, is it vodka? It's by like Firefly Distillery in South Carolina.
Cute.
It's actually pretty tasty.
Firefly is a Southern thing meaning, like the word and because I think there. So there's a show out that we collaborated with on the light pink page for Netflix with Katherine Heigl, and it's called Firefly, but it's based off of a book, and you might love the book because it's fiction and it looks amazing. Like a bunch of friends. And anyway, we just did a collaboration with them and I think it's Southern. I think it's a Southern show.
Wait, how come I didn't know about this? I have obviously not been checking my social media.
I don't know. But that might be a good thing for you. Cause I know that it's good for you to not be on social all the time and you can just hear things like this from me.
Well, I'm really excited to write it down on my notepad and go look at it later.
So maybe we need to drink light pink and firefly.
Yeah.
Slash. Whatever it is. You're welcome. For the free ad.
You're welcome. Firefly Distillery.
You're Welcome. I'll invoice you. Just kidding. God.
I was thinking earlier when you said, like. I don't remember what you said, but I remember having this thought.
I'm glad. Impactful. Go ahead.
I was thinking that I bet, like all the guardian angels, they probably switch out shifts and they're like, oh, Sandra, you're on Lori and Evan's show this morning. Just like. And Sandra's like, I just had them. I just had the shift yesterday. Sandra, the guardian angel.
Wait, who's the one that was switching out? I don't.
Yeah, Paul.
So Paul's like, look, I had drinks last night. I only have a couple of brain cells left. Sandra, I can't spare them on this show again. And they're like, quit drinking angel juice. Fine. Oh, she's up there with her wings. Like, just like face, like face palm the whole time. Wing palm. Like, the wings are just over her eyes.
She's. She's so done. Thanks, Sandra.
Oh, thanks, Sandra. Angel. But maybe she's helping us drop. Drop these nuggets.
Yeah, they're little angel dust nuggets.
I like it. So what's. You know what, Evans, we recorded yesterday because I have to travel this week. So what happened in the 24 hour span? Was there anything? Because a lot can happen in 24 hours. Oh, my God, think of this. Do you know how much you can change in 24 hours? You can get a boyfriend. You could. Not you yourself.
I mean, I guess that's what happened to me yesterday. I got a boyfriend.
I mean, you really could. I don't know what your relationship is like with your husband, but if you wanted, it's quick. Like, you could probably go on some sort of like, hey, I have a husband and I'm getting I want a relationship website. Because those exist. Well, they're not websites. They're more like apps now. But you could get a partner. You could read a whole book that could change your life. You could do an E. Course. You could do. Listen to me. Can you tell what my life is made up? Of course. You could start drink. Drinking really healthy. Yeah. You could stop drinking. You could start eating really healthy. You could do a workout. You could literally break up with a friend who's ruining your life. And your whole life could be. You could start a business. Oh, my God. Like 24 hours.
It really. That's so true. There's so much you can do in 24 hours.
We need to make a song, an inspirational song.
I actually had a business idea yesterday.
Please tell me. All right, so I Got a flat.
Tire and I had to go to. Luckily I was right near a tire place, which was so nice because I guess Sandra was still on duty.
I was just gonna say so Sandra.
Sandra was like, I got you, girl. Here's her tire place. So I went in and they were so nice and it was great. But wouldn't it be nice if there was like a dry bar equivalent of auto places for women and it had like nice fruit water and you didn't feel like you were getting bamboozled and they all had cute coveralls on, you know, I don't know, like.
Like a Hooters for women with.
Yes.
With things to do. Like a potential blowout and fruit infused water. I mean, I mean, I can see it. I can see the chains blowing up. I love it. I don't know if there's enough women that would bring their car there, but. Yeah, actually. So is it like a pumps, Is it like a. I'm trying to think of the fast ones that I used to go through. Like a Jiffy oil lube.
Oh, yeah, I love those. So it'd still be like that. You don't necessarily have to get your hair done or anything. I'm just saying like a dry bar esthetic, like, it's nice, has good branding.
So I definitely think that we could pitch this to an already existing business as well, like a Jiffy Lube and say, here's how 80% of the women feel coming into. I mean, it's. I have sat in those waiting rooms when I was single and it feels crazy. Like it just feels like I don't belong. But I don't know if they're trying to get us to belong, but I do feel like we are. I mean, there are a lot of us out there who would definitely take an extra drive or do something to get to this place that feels a little bit more welcoming.
Yeah, welcoming. And I know they're female mechanics and for sure, women that work in auto industry. So we could get them to head it up and then you'd be like.
All right, you know what? I really hope that this planted a seed in female mechanic's heart today. Start something, because I would. I mean, I know that you're in Sandusky, Ohio, but I. Is that a place? I think so.
I think it is.
But really, I will drive there from here to just sit in your waiting room.
It would be so much nicer. I just hate. And these people were so lovely. I wasn't trying to say they weren't, but no, I Get it.
It's just not a super welcoming waiting room. I totally get it. It's like, that's like saying, you know, I wish there was other gyms that weren't meathead gyms. And there are. So that's great. And I don't want to go to that one. And that's okay too. What was I going to say about the waiting rooms or the. Oh, so good. Sorry, guys. It's gone. It's gone. You'll think of it later. Evans, do you have a quote?
I do. It's from Anne Lamott and it's a short quote. And she says no is a complete sentence.
Oh, man. I'm telling you. Learn the power of asking and then learn the power of no, and you will be an unstoppable force. What have you said no to lately that you feel like it empowered you on the other side?
Oh, man, I don't think I have said no to anything because I want to do stuff right now because there's nothing to do.
Well, you're in a year of yes, though, and you need to say yes to all the things because you need to get that. So I've had years of yes where I'm just like, I gotta say yes to pretty much everything. Unless, you know, it's out of alignment or it's like, you know, like my girlfriends keep asking me to dinner over and over and I need to start my business. Then I say no to that. But I say yes to the opportunities. Just depends on what year you're in. Sometimes I'm in friendship year where I'm like, you need to go out with friends and make sure that's in your life. So assess what you need most and what is missing. What would you say is missing right now? What do you need to be saying yes to?
Structure.
Oh, that's good. Yep. Yeah, yeah, real good. Trust me, I'm. I'm finally feel structured after about nine years. So I hope that helpful for you. Great, great. So I'll talk to you in 2029. That'd be 20. That'd be 2030. But yeah, but math. Yeah. So M A, T, H. I can spell it. All right, so with that said, I'm gonna go to my quote because that seems to be the structure of this podcast. See, you have plenty of structure. We follow structure once a week. You're doing it twice this week. All right, so this is from Jen Sincero, who writes one of my favorite books early on when I. We like getting into self development. You are a badass. Everybody Loves that book. She also has a new book out called I think it's you're a badass at making money. And she has another book out that didn't really. I didn't see it advertised anywhere, and I can't remember the title, but look it up. Look it up, everybody.
I'll look it up.
She says so often we pretend we've made a decision when what we've really done is signed up to try until it gets too comfortable. Try until it gets. Yep. Or to try. Like, I'm gonna just. I'm gonna add something to her quote here. She did not say this. This is what I'm gonna say. Or try until it gets too hard. Yeah, there we go.
I just looked her other book. Looks like it was Badass Habits.
Oh, that's good. I should totally listen to that. She records her own as far as I know. She did before. Records her own. What's the. What do you say for audiation? Audio? Audiobook, yeah. Thank you.
Oh, audition sounds like flying books. And I like that.
Oh, I love that. Like, help me with the navigation word. What is it for flight?
Aviation.
Thank you so much for that. It's early. I have an excuse, by the way, as well. That's me at noon. That's me at noon o' clock on the daily as well. So I just hope this makes everybody feel better, just hearing how we forget everything. So with that said. And I also noticed that with that said is a nice way to buy yourself time. So if you want to start adding that to your normal day, you can use that. So do we have questions?
Yeah. Do you want a review?
Oh, that's right, we do that. I would love a review.
It's part of our structure. This is from Monast. I love how fun and fresh this podcast is. I almost felt like I was a part of this conversation. More of these, please, than she did. The hand emoji and the 100 emoji.
Oh, we got a double emoji from her.
Yes.
I mean, when you get the double bubble, that means that you are just. I feel really good about this and thank you so much because that's what we aim for, fun and educational. I know you didn't say educational, but thanks.
You're welcome.
What was her name again?
Manta. Wait, how do I pronounce this? Mona Saddy.
Mana Saddy. If we're saying that terribly, I'm sorry. But it's beautiful. So thank you so much. That's really awesome. I'm just laughing because you're laughing, but thank you so much. Your review was really awesome. And. And like, literally we thank the people for the nice reviews. It's so funny. I was. I was trying to copy and paste my podcast to send it to someone who had asked for a link to a recording. And so I went on there and I saw, like, a recent review was on there online because I was like, on my computer on itunes, and it just pops up underneath it. And it said something like, get a real job. And it was like, one star. Cause that's the lowest you can give. And I was like, oh, this is so great. Like, it didn't even bother me. I just was a moment. And don't get me wrong, if it was something like really like, he just would have, like, attacked my personality. I'm sure I would have been upset. But it was just a guy who read the description and he was like, lifestyle entrepreneur, get a real job. And I'm like, hey, valid, valid. You didn't. You don't know me. And that is. If I told you I was a lifestyle entrepreneur, I do believe that I'd be like, what the hell is that? Are you couch surfing? And that's fine too. But I really think that needs a freshen up, which I think we're doing. I'm actually doing a relaunch of this podcast. Just a quick freshen up of the intro, but I'm keeping some of the intro because I know that I feel very called to the. What is it, like, the anoint ourselves part?
Yeah, I love. I love your intro.
Yeah, we're gonna keep that part. We're gonna freshen up some other things. And we're also getting a fresh cover. Don't you worry, though. And not like anyone's worried. Don't worry. I'm not egotistical enough to think you're going to miss my old cover, but I'm excited about the new one.
It just needs a freshie fresh.
It's been four years.
Just need a freshie fresh. It's good to do that like a haircut.
It's going to feel like you got a good haircut, but not the kind where you're like, what the hell? I wanted my split ends off. He took six inches. Oh, that's annoying. They're like, your hair is not healthy, so we need to cut it up to your ears. You're like, my hair was down to my butt. That is tough. And it's fine if you like short hair, but if that's not what you asked for, don't deliver me that. You know, I didn't order a cheeseburger, I ordered a tofu sandwich. All right, let's go. What do you got for a question?
All right, here is a question from Ms. Underscore. Ava B. Ava B. A great name. She says, I'm struggling to be consistent with my business social media account.
Well, I can't help you. Do you see mine? I'm just kidding. My business social media account is on point. I'm not gonna lie. It's the only thing about social media that is on point for me. So. And the only reason that that happened, if you wanna know, is because I hired somebody. So we, we do work together as a team. So we are now coming up with a lot of the content coming out in the next few months. But then what they do is they post it. They make sure like the captions are all cleaned up and they do a lot of like the photography and shooting and things like that. Now if you're not in that place, there are people though who can help you with the structure. And there is an app called Plannable. So what you can do is like a couple days every single month, you can go in to the app plannable for social media and you can set up your grid so that you know exactly what to post and you can kind of decide like, so here's what we do. We go, all right, so do we want to get like something structured for. Monday is Monday. Monday's like a motivational post. Tuesday is going to be like a mini giveaway and that could be, you know, and if you don't have stuff to give away every Tuesday, that's fine. Like sometimes we give away like a 15 minute coaching call. That's what we're going to be doing, our 20 minute coaching call. So if you have an asset like that, you can do that. If you don't, that's totally fine. You know, there are other things you can get creative too. You can find female founded brands and say, hey, do you mind sending me like one of your products, I'll promote it on my page and you could do a giveaway with their stuff or no giveaway at all. You know, Tuesday could be like a female founded business that you love or a business that you love in general. Wednesday could be like a, a highlight of something, anything, like someone else's business. It could be someone else's quote that you tag them and give them credit. Thursday could be. It just depends on your business. Right? It could be like outfit inspiration and you can throw that, pepper that in if that you Want that to be part of your brand? I don't know, it goes on and on and on. So then you have a structure. Half of the reason why we struggle is because we don't have a structure. We're like, I don't know what to post today, but if you know this is a motivational quote and it can be from someone else, just tag them. Like, then you can follow the structure. And especially if you've pre planned it because you set aside time for it, then you're not fumbling. And on the days where you have zero motivation and you started your period or something and you don't want to post anything except like a middle finger up. And if that goes with your aesthetic, do it. But if it's. If you're like, if you sell puppies to children, don't do that. I don't know if you should start a business based on selling puppies to children. And for.
That's a bad idea. But also a great one.
I mean, kids love puppies. So do I. I would have bought one as a child if I was allowed, for sure. So with that said, if you're having a rough day, maybe this is really. And I have a lot of rough days. And I'm so glad I don't have to come up with content on the days where I'm like, I'm really on the struggle bus. But those are important posts, too. Anyhow, now I'm way off track. So. So what do you think, Evans?
No, I like what you said because it all comes back to structure and planning. So maybe if you're struggling, it's like, take an hour to sit down and be like, all right, what do I want to hit with my social media in the next two weeks or even a week ahead or even three days. Whatever it takes.
Yes.
And here's I need to do the same thing.
We overthink it. Like, I totally overthink it on my page. And I. I need a plan. So now I need a plan for my personal page because I realized how good it's working for us on the other one. And it's just, it doesn't have to be that crazy. Like, I can't believe how even when I repost, you know, a quote that I know worked on someone else's page. And give them credit, you guys. So one of the best advice like keys that I've ever got from somebody was from Natalie Ellis and Danielle Canty came and spoke at our mastermind there on the Boss Babe page. And you guys know that their page is like millions of followers. And so what they do is they go and look at what posts did really well on other people's page and they make their own version of it, or they repost that and tag and give them credit. So you're taking content that, you know, hit with a similar audience to yours and that's what they do and they go and get creative off of like, okay, what is the. So let's say there was a like a sort of like go girl, like in business posts that really did well. And I'm not saying that's what it said. It's that. It's that vibe of posts. And what you do is you see what the vibe was and you see what the comments are underneath and what people are responding to. And you take that and you put it in your own words, please do not plagiarize someone else. But you take that vibe of like, what is this? Is this like a, you know, a do it anyway type of feel? Is this like a yes, we're all scared type of feel and try to make up something off of that vibe in your own words. And you just have to play with it and keep trying until something hits.
That's a great idea because there's all these trends and things that everyone, you look back and you're like, oh, this is what was going on at this time.
And yes, it's a trend.
Follow along.
Yeah, absolutely. What's the next cue in this? Let's get queued up in this.
Queued up.
Okay. Ooh.
This is from Danny G. Morris. Can you talk about how to overcome greed? I'm seeing it become an addicting habit.
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Oh, this is good. Interesting. How to overcome greed well, this is the desire for where does greed come from? Let's talk about this. Greed is is coming from a place of lack. So sometimes and this may not be you at all. But I'm trying to think when I wanted more, more, more, more, more. It was coming from a place of myself not feeling like I was enough and like I was worthy as well. And like, I, I wasn't satisfied or fulfilled in my life. So I'm. I'm gonna challenge you to look and see. And sometimes I have to be honest. Sometimes you need to like really explore what actual, tangible, earthly, external things that you're desiring. And sometimes there's a part of you that actually needs to get these things to know that they're not fulfilling. So if you are noticing that as you are getting things, whether it's cars, bags, homes, guys, friends, whatever, that it's not actually fulfilling you to explore a lot deeper. And I say, I say do this obviously along with this and first, but it's like, just dig at what's underneath that. So what is a part of you that isn't feeling satiated? Like, if I was on a podcast, I'd probably ask somebody, what's missing? Like, what do you feel like is missing in yourself, in your day to day, in your relationships, in your fulfillment? What is it that you feel like you really want? Like, what's the actual, not the thing? So take away any external things. Be like, what is it that's actually missing in your day? What would, what would you be really, really fulfilled and satisfied off of if you had this or you felt this? And why? Like, what could be something that you could be doing in order to satiate that thing? Because greed just comes from lack of you feeling like you are not enough in some way. Because if you are completely satisfied and you felt talented in some area and you gave that lots of out, right? Like if you. Let's just say if all of a sudden, you know, you felt greed around things, but all of a sudden you wanted, you've always wanted this like, talent of playing the piano or of being an incredible speaker or of, you know, learning how to decorate and create this business that would fulfill you in some crazy way. You probably wouldn't even want that thing anymore. Cause you'd be so satisfied in your art or in this mastery of something. And that's just what I found. I thought that I binge ate because I was just hungry. And I was like, this was a problem and a bad habit and I was just addicted to food. But what happened is underneath that addiction and that binge eating addiction and habit, it was. I wasn't feeling fulfilled or enough. And I didn't have things that I really loved doing. And I didn't have a business that I was obsessed with working on. And I didn't have people that I felt like I could add value to. And I didn't know what My innate value even was. And as soon as I started, you know, businesses that I loved and went where the fear was, it's crazy how that habit, like, started to turn off. I just did not. I didn't do that anymore. Cause I was so full and satisfied from what I did every day. And I think that if we don't have that, whether it shows up as binge eating or it shows up as, you know, wanting to go out or drinking or, you know, who knows? I mean, it can be crazy things. Picking your face, sleeping with people you don't want to, like, whatever. I mean, these are very real things that, like, if you're getting really real and raw, this is what you do. You fill them with these crazy things that are sabotaging. And these are crazy things that you feel like you can't share with people. And that's just what's going to happen if we don't start really looking at why you're doing that thing.
So it's like a little greed could be like a little. What's the word? When you're dressed as something? It's like a little.
What's the disguise?
Disguise for something underneath it, for sure.
It always is. They always come in these hideous disguises, and you feel so ashamed, and then you don't share them, and then you wonder if anybody else is struggling with them. So it's nice.
And we all are.
We all are. And this all started when we were about 6 years old, and we couldn't go to dance class because our mom wouldn't enroll us in it because we couldn't afford it or we weren't allowed because of our religion. So we cut our bangs. You know what I'm saying?
Yes.
It's exactly how it started. And we were like, I'm supposed to be a dancer. F you, Mom. And so you cut your bangs and you're like, that's fine. I'll do something else creative in my bedroom. Watch me. You know what else? I'm going to cut every single doll's hair. Every single one, because it feels like a creative outlet. Oh, you like this doll you just bought for me that you could hardly afford. No hair.
Cutting it all off.
Cutting it all off. Because I think I'm a stylist, and I'm not. So watch your daughters. Watch your sons. Oh, you know what else will happen? Like Chris Harder, who lit his house on fire because he was bored, so he took hairspray to the outside of his stucco home. I thought it'd be really cool because maybe because he wasn't enrolled in football early enough or something. Yeah.
Gotta have those activities.
Exactly. Or we find activities.
I know.
That's what I need right now. It's like when you don't have structured activities, you're like, ooh, peanut butter.
Yep. You're about to cut your own hair. You know what? You're about to give yourself your own tattoo. Like, with pokey needles. I'm serious. I lived up north. There were so many kids busting out of the woodwork with homemade tattoos because they were bored. There was nothing to do up there. I mean, like, we would literally do the craziest things. Like, me and my friend smoked a pine cone once. We were not. We weren't allowed to do things, so we found things in nature.
Yes, that.
It's a lesson. I mean, we would try to. We would try to make fires with sticks. I mean, that's not. Everybody did that. But for real, we would just try to do the craziest things. And then in my teenage years, it led to beer bonging in the woods. That's not great either. If I would have just been enrolled in dance class, we could have absolutely negated all of these things.
Well, then you wouldn't be this amazing person.
Oh, that's true. All those beer bongs. Like, watch this. Oh, we're beer bonging a 40. Wow, that was tough. I didn't do it, but my friends did. So anyhow, God love everybody who's in the woods right now.
I know.
Who has homemade tattoos and our beer bogging. And, I mean, if you would have looked at me at that age, you would have been like, wow, you're gonna amount to a whole lot of absolutely nothing. So just remember that everybody has hope.
Yes, everyone has hope. And we all do ridiculous things.
Yep, totally.
We all put our pants on the same.
Isn't that the truth? I was about to go on another tangent, but we're at the 30 minute mark. I'm going to spare everybody. I don't know what else is coming out of this mouth today or yours.
So just leave it at that.
Look, Sandra is up there. Literally, like, throw. Yes. Wrap. Come on, guys. I got another shift here. You're killing me. Oh, God, I hope she gets Joe Dispenza next. Like, I just pray that she can recover herself. Go check out his podcast. He's going to really help you.
A lot more structure.
Yeah, totally. All right, Sandra, thank you so much for sitting in on this podcast. Paul, thanks for not believing in us, but Sandra tapped back in, so. Evans, any last words.
You can be anything you want to.
Be, and we proved it today. So thanks everyone for tuning in. Until next time, earn your happy.
Bye everyone.
One thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the Earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take one second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and and leaving us an honest thought, an honest comment. Tell us what you think, tell us what you want to hear more of. It would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again guys. Bye Bye.
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