68: Proof YOU Have Been Chosen for YOUR Mission with Kute Blackson

Foreign.

Welcome to the Earn your Happy Podcast.

I'm Lori Harder, founder of The Bliss.

Project, 3 Time Fitness World champion, fitness expert and cover model, turned self love junkie, lifestyle entrepreneur and author.

Each week I'll bring you a guest.

Or a thought that will help you bust through your fears, connect to your soul and get focused and clear so you can elevate your life, business and relationships. We don't wait until we're ready for someone to tell us we're good enough. We take what we want and we anoint ourselves, get ready to earn, own and unapologetically rock your happiness every single day. Are you with me? Here we go. Welcome back to the Earn your happy podcast and today it is my honor to have Coot Blackson on this episode. And I will tell you that I really loved having this conversation. I felt a new jolt of life come over me and it was the perfect timing, let me tell you. I was having one of those weeks in this conversation just really breathed life into me and I know that it will do the same for you. He is a charismatic visionary and transformational teacher and he truly offers a bold look at spiritual awareness. He has a multicultural upbringing and he was raised all over the world and dreamed of life in America. And he has an incredible journey and shares so much of that not just here, but also in his new book, you are the One. It was published by Simon and Schuster and released worldwide on June 7th of 2016. I can tell you I already have it on rush order. It's probably going to be at my doorstep tomorrow and I cannot wait to dive in after listening to this podcast. So without further ado, let's get started. Coot, thank you so much for coming on the show. I'm so excited to have you here.

So great to be here. I've been looking forward to it.

Oh, thank you so much. And I would love for all the people who maybe don't know your story if you would share a bit about yourself because it is so interesting just everything that you've lived through and I think it's so valuable for what you're going to offer.

Sure, sure. Just a little bit of background, you know. I was born in Ghana, West Africa. My father's from Ghana, my mother's Japanese. I grew up in London. I live in LA now. So I've always felt like a citizen of the world and that's really been at the found who I am. But I remember being around two things. I remember being around age 5 and feeling a deep, profound, burning desire to serve People and make a difference in people's lives. And it was like a calling. I didn't really understand it, but that always consumed me. And I knew I would be helping people in some way. But I remember being also around age 6, age 7, and I was a chubby kid, and I was lost in the crowd in Ghana, West Africa, and I literally saw this crippled woman crawling on the floor. Laurie. And she picked up the sand, this man walked on, wiped it on her face, and stood up. And so you could call that a miracle. And week after week, I grew up seeing blind people, see deaf people, hear people, stand up in wheelchairs. This same man who Sanshee picked up would look at a woman in a wheelchair and say, why are you in this wheelchair? You're not sick. Stand up, stand up. And they would stand up. And week after week, I grew up seeing these really profound miracles. And for me, it was normal, because this was my reality. But this man was my father. And he built 300 churches in Ghana, West Africa, huge church in London. So as a young boy, I was always obsessed with spirituality and mysticism and the other world and just the possibilities of life because I saw these incredible things happening. It was just. It's normal. And so I must have been 8, read my first self help book at age 8 and start asking questions of who are we and why are we here and what's the purpose of life, what's the nature of existence, and why are some people happy and why some people are miserable? And so when I was age 8, I actually started speaking in my father's churches when I was age 8, gave my first speech at age 8 to about 5,000 people. And that's when a sort of inner process began for me. And then When I was 14, I was ordained as a minister, given a mandate to take over my father's churches. And, you know, I'll be honest, Laurie. I knew when that moment happened, it was hundreds of thousands of people having hopes and expectations on me. I knew that that wasn't my path. I knew that that wasn't my destiny, that wasn't my purpose. But truthfully, I was too afraid to say anything. And I wanted my father's love. I wanted his acceptance. I wanted everyone's love and acceptance. I didn't want to be outcast alone. I didn't want to rock the boat. I didn't want to make waves. And so I. I went along with it. And even though I wanted to help people, but I knew deep down, if I was honest, this isn't my path. And it tore me up for about four years. And I just felt terrified that if I acknowledged the truth of my being, then I would lose my father and I'd be outcast and I'd have nothing. After about four years of inner turmoil, one day I came to a realization. And I realized that I could follow the expected life, the safe life, the life that everyone expects of me, that I'd be pretty successful. But if I was successful by everyone else's standards, but not my own, I didn't have myself, then what was the point? I'd be a failure. And I could feel like I was. By going down this path, I was committing a certain soul suicide. And it was so painful. It was so painful. And then I looked at this other path, the unknown, following my dreams, coming to America. And I wanted to go into this field of personal growth, growth since I was in my teens, and teach. And I was a kid who we grew up quite poor, so we literally lived in an apartment that was a part of the church attached to the back. And my room was so small, you could fit one single bed in it and maybe squeeze yourself through the door into the bed. And I felt so freaking limited by my circumstance. And I had these big visions and these big dreams, and yet here I was in a tiny room that fit one bed, and I was like, you know what? This is not going to be my reality. And I would sneak out at night into my father's church with the lights off in the darkness, and I would speak for hours. This went on for years. I would speak for three to four hours to the empty chairs, and I would pour my heart out, speaking a message of inspiration and dreams and possibilities. And I'd imagine souls sitting in these chairs, lighting up, having their lives transformed, crying. And I was sweating, and it was like 1am in the morning. And night after night, I would speak and imagine myself with thousands of people in Madison Square Garden. And so it's always amazing now when I have the opportunity to speak, I think, oh, my God, here are the souls that I spoke to when I was 12, 13, 14 years old. And so I finally mustered up the courage, though, when I was 18, to have a conversation with my father and leave the ministry. And I left everything behind, had the conversation. I was sure he was never going to speak to me again. We didn't speak to two years, but I knew that from that moment, nothing was worth compromising my soul, nothing was worth compromising my happiness, nothing was worth compromising the truth of what I knew. And many times I Believe that one of the things that keeps us stuck in life are all the ways we lie to ourselves, all the ways we BS ourselves, all the ways we rationalize, we settle, we compromise, we betray ourselves, we sell ourselves out from the truth of what we feel and what we know deep inside. And we often try and build a happy life based on a lie. And if we're not telling the truth, we're not in touch with the truth of what we feel. No matter what we create, it's still based on a lie. So for me, I was afraid of telling the truth because of the consequences. And I think many times we're afraid of the consequences of what will happen if I'm fully who I am, what will happen if I really am myself, if I really speak my truth. I'll be abandoned, I'll be outcast, I'll be alone. No one will love me. People will find out certain things and they won't want to be around me anymore, or I'll fail, or I'll succeed. And so there's all these consequences we're afraid of that stop us from speaking our truth. And so I always invite people to say, look, happiness is easy. Happiness is, let me phrase it this way, happiness is simple. It's not always easy. But it does require the courageous decision to feel the truth, embrace the truth, speak the truth, live the truth. Simple. It's not complicated. But we don't. And we're often afraid. So we often play this game. This is the game I played. We often play this game of. I'm so confused, I'm not sure, you know, I don't know. I don't know what I'm here to do. I don't know what I want with my life. I don't know what my goals are. I don't know what my purpose is. I don't know if this relationship is right for me when deep down we know. And I think the time has come for each of us, especially for those on this call, if you're on this call, that maybe your soul has called you to this moment, to this interview, to feel what is your truth. And I think the moment we're willing to own the truth, feel the truth and live the truth is the moment our life begins to shift. And once I did, cut a long story short, I won a green card in the lottery, came to the U.S. two suitcases, you know, one in the country, $1,000 and went on a quest and found teachers, mentors, authors, all of the best selling folks. You know, you've probably read and studied and traveled the world and went to places like India and Thailand and Bali and Israel, northern Spain in search of answers and then came back. And over the last 15 years I've had the privilege of coaching people from all walks of life and speaking around the world. And now my books come out. So that's. That's the short story.

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You ever feel like you are in front of like 25 different paths? I am so interested and curious and I also resonate with actually so much of your story because I come from a really religious background and I kind of had to deal with the same thing of realizing that that was not my path and fear of being rejected by my family and having that conversation. And there was a point where my soul was like you. It absolutely. I couldn't even live that way another day knowing that my calling was something so different. So I was just sitting here nodding my head like frantically while you were speaking. So I completely feel that. And you know, there are so many questions I want to ask you, but I guess the one that's coming forward because you shared so much of your story in such a beautiful way, you were talking about, you know, once we realize what our truth is. Because I think what happened, listening to your story to a lot of people is that they probably. No, I mean, they're probably sitting here repeating what their truth is in their head. Like, wow, I know this. But now what? Because now the fear comes up. Now the stories come up. Now the playing out, all of the terrifying possibilities is coming up. So what are some things when you coach people or that you do yourself instead of thinking of all those things, how can we switch gears to make sure that they start moving in the path of going towards their truth?

Yeah, I think first you have to be willing to. You have to be willing to tell the truth to yourself. There's a few questions that I think will also help and a few maybe action steps. And number one is just simply admitting to yourself, what lies am I telling? What are the truths I'm not telling? What am I pretending to not know? What am I pretending to not know? And to sit with what is it? Because, you know, sometimes we pretend to not know, you know, I mean, how many times have you been in a relationship like, well, I don't know if this is what I don't know. And then when we break up, we're like, you know what? When I first met that person, I knew that. I knew something was off. I knew something was off. So we have to be really willing to be like, you know what? I will not compromise. When we compromise ourselves, it's painful. When we compromise ourselves, it's expensive. When we compromise ourselves, we disconnect. We make a withdrawal from our own integrity with ourselves. And to me, when we withdraw from the integrity with ourselves, and then we try and go manifest in the world to create the next level. We don't have as much inner alignment and power now. So to really look at what am I pretending to not know? Because I do know. So what am I pretending to not know and to own, just to have the courage to own that third thing I have people look at is, what is this truth costing me? Okay, now I've told the truth. What is it costing me? And to be willing to feel that many times we're like, okay, this is the truth. Let me distract myself. Let me, you know, social media it away, Let me drink it away, let me sex it away, let me work it away. Just distract myself. Because I don't want to know the truth, or I don't want to feel, or I know the truth, but I don't want to feel what it's costing me. So I can numb myself. Because if I don't feel what it's costing me, then I don't have to take action. But if we're willing to say, okay, I'm going to feel what it's costing me, being in a relationship that is unfulfilling. Being in a job where I feel like I'm having to compromise my integrity or I hate it. Feel what it's costing you, feel the pain. That's not like a motivational tactic. It's going to be painful. But if we're willing to not numb it, to not run from it, then we don't put a band aid on it. Which, if we put a band aid on it, then it allows us to perpetuate, continuing, because we never really feel the pain of what it's costing us. So if we can feel what it's costing us, wow, this really hurts. And every day the truth starts burning. Every day it burns more. It Burns a little more. Eventually we will say, you know what, I have to take some action, I have to do something, I have to make a change. Eventually it will hit a threshold of I have to do something differently. So feel what it's costing you. And then look at what's the worst I'm afraid will happen. What's the worst thing I'm afraid will happen? There are a couple of reasons I invite people to ask that question is sometimes we think we have this worst case scenario that 80% of the time often never happens. We're really good, the mind is really good at freaking us out. We freak ourselves out. And many times our nightmare scenario doesn't happen if we were able to just face what is the worst thing. I'm afraid it will happen. And I'm running from it and I'm not even sure what it is, but what is it? And if we're willing to face it, many times when we're willing to face the worst fear, at least for me, I've been able to look at it and go, you know, it wouldn't be what I would want. But if that happened, I could probably deal with that. If that was the worst, I would find a way if that's the worst, I would find a way to deal with that. So then, then the fear shifts, then the fear of that worst case scenario can shift. Because sometimes I'll ask people, so what's the worst that would happen if you left your job and you pursued your entrepreneurial vision? What's the worst that would. I'll give an example. I had the client who said she wanted to be a coach and she was doing this corporate job that she hated. And so what's the worst that would happen? Well, I would do my job. And then what? And then I would. Then maybe it wouldn't work. And then what? My savings would go down and then what? Then I'd have less money. Then what? Then I'd, you know. Then what? Then I'd be broke. And then what? And you know, I thought she was just, I'd be homeless, I would die, there was nothing. And she. And what she said was, well, I guess. So I asked her, how long do you have before you would be completely broke? And she said about 18 months or two years. And that was like not making a cent, right? That's making nothing. Do you have two years to succeed? And yeah, I'd have two years. So what's the worst that would happen? Would you be homeless? He goes, hell no, I wouldn't be homeless by the time I got to a year, I'd probably figure out a different situation. And I said, what would you do? Worst case, I would go back to doing what I'm doing. I said, what? She said, worst case, I would go back to doing what I'm doing. So I looked her and I said, so right now, what you're doing now, you're already doing the worst case. She was like, oh, my God. What you're doing right now is already the worst case. You are facing the worst thing that's ever going to happen, which is you're going to go back to doing the job that you don't really like. That's the worst. You know what the worst is? So the next question really is to ask people, okay, now that you know what the worst is, if you can make peace with the worst, then it no longer. The fear of the worst no longer runs you. Then you can look at what great thing might happen. We're so often afraid and focused on the fear. What amazing thing might happen, what possibility might happen. Then we start tapping into the inner resources, the inner magic inside of us, and we start going the direction of the vision and shifting our focus. So what incredible things might happen? What possibility might happen? And look at that. And then I believe, look, we have to take action. We have to be in action in the world to rearrange the structure of our lives. And if we acknowledge that something's not working, we can pray, we can meditate, we can drink our green juice, we can exercise, we can do yoga, we can do Reiki, we can go to India, we can go to the temples. But look, if you hate your job and the shit isn't really aligned, then you've got to recreate your physical environment so that the physical structure and environment, whether it's a relationship, a job, a situation, your body can match what you really want. We can't just, well, I hate this, and God's going to do it for me. Let me pray about it. Yeah, pray about it and take some specific action. And maybe it's not drastic, but at least each day, if we can take a little bit of action each day, that moves us closer to the truth. A little bit of action each day that moves us closer to what we really want. It's better than nothing. It's a beginning. It's a beginning. So I would say to start there. But the truth for me, Laurie, is the foundation of everything. It's the foundation of really creating an authentic life. And many times we're not acknowledging the truth. We're not acknowledging the truth of what we feel, what we know, what we want, and we wonder why we're miserable. It's like, of course you're miserable, because you're lying to yourselves and you're living a lie. You're in a relationship that you hate. You're with someone that you're not in love with. How are you supposed to be happy? Buddha could float. I tell people, Buddha could float down from the sky, and you're still going to feel miserable unless you make some specific changes in your life. And that takes courage. And to me, that is profoundly spiritual. When we're willing to take the vision and the ideas and implement that into our lives. That is. That's heroic right there.

I'm furiously taking notes, but I just absolutely love that you said it so perfectly that the truth burns. And to allow it to burn, it's that we're constantly running from that. And if you actually allow it to burn, the burning makes you take action.

That's the gift.

Please burn me. That is the gift to move me forward.

You know what the Dalai Lama, they interviewed the Dalai Lama, Lori, many years ago, and it was crazy. I saw this interview, you know, the Dalai Lama, the sweet, happy guy, right? Loving the world. And they asked him, so, Dalai Lama, what do you wish for the West? Like, what's your wish for the West? And you know what he said? Said, more suffering. I was like, what? More suffering, more suffering. And it hit me, like, wow. Because it's the burn, you know, it's the burn of the truth. Sometimes we need to burn in the truth. Because if you speak the truth and it's painful and you burn in it, it is painful. Eventually, you will have to change. Eventually. Even if you don't take action now, it begins a process inside that you can't go back. But if you lie to yourself, then you can constantly perpetuate your current reality and never really change.

I love that I always think about that, because it's really. I can't remember the quote, but what is it? It's like the fatality of greatness is just being good. Like, it's just being. We're just so comfortable. Yes, we're so terribly, uncomfortably comfortable. And I know even when you were even saying that, that is the most pointed, amazing laser question is, is what? Let's see, what did you say? What are we pretending to not know? What are we pretending to know? That is a really quick way to get things directly to the surface. And I love that you said that. You know, you have to create your own environment in order to create changes in your life and to be active. Yes, we can pray, yes, we can meditate, yes, we can manifest the crap out of things. But if we're not in action and constantly creating something new, nothing is going to change. So I know that you had a complete life change coming to la. Were some things that you in LA of all places? I'm from the Midwest and came to la. So what were some things that you did and took action on when you were like, I just. I need to create this place where I can manifest my dreams, where I can create a life that I want. What were some steps that you took when you got here?

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It was very. I'll be straight up with you. It was very difficult when I got here because I showed up with $1,000 and I knew no one. When I say no one. I knew nobody in the US and so I cried. I'll be honest, I cried like a baby for a week.

Yes, I would, too.

And then I realized, uh, oh, this is gonna. I'm homeless, just crying like a baby and I feel like I couldn't go back. And I rented a tiny little apartment. It was like, I don't know, 304, 500. It was just one box of a room. I slept on the floor. And two things. I was so happy. I was so happy because, yeah, I was a little scared, but I was so happy because, you know, I felt free, like I wasn't compromising my soul. But on one level, I was happy. On another level, you know, as months went by and I was struggling, and I was struggling, I was hustling, I was working odd jobs here and there. I started getting frustrated. I got to a place where I was mad at the world. I was mad at God because I felt like I had made this decision and I followed the path. And here I was, broke, living on an old mattress I found on the street, literally stealing bread from the supermarket just to eat. And I was mad at God, mad at life, mad at my dad because I felt like I had no support and I was stuck. I remember that moment you talk about, what did I do? I was stuck in this moment because I was paralyzed to really take action. And I was in this pity party victim state of, like, I'm not supported, the universe doesn't love me. And I was just stuck in this place for, like, a long time. And one day. I don't know what happened, Laurie, but it was as though something Just slapped me across the forehead and said, wake up. And I realized that if I was going to truly be able to take action, do the things I knew I needed to do, then I'm going to have to give up this. What I was going to have to give up with the sense of entitlement. And I realized what I'm going to have to give up is the sense of, like, no one owes me anything. It was this idea, this concept, like, God owes me something. My parents owe me something, my dad owes me something, the government owes me something. And I realized I was, in this sense, I was paralyzed in the sense of entitlement. Now, I'm not saying it wouldn't be nice if my father supported or people helped, but what was keeping me stuck is my sense of entitlement. And when I dropped that, it was profoundly freeing to give up, to adopt the paradigm of no one owes me anything. I've been given everything. Hands, eyes, sight, health. Each moment is actually the proof and the living proof of the totality of the love of the universe that's breathing through us in every moment. What else do I need? Yes, he wasn't a perfect parent. And I can wallow in that for the rest of my life and use that as an excuse or a crush as to why I'm not going to succeed. Or I could forgive him and realize, you know what? He gave me life. Reality is, what else do I need? And for me, it was a growing up process of letting go of entitlement and truly taking responsibility for my life and owning my power. Because when we take responsibility, you are the one. When we take responsibility, then we no longer have any excuses. It's no longer my father's fault. It's no longer society's fault. It's no longer the government's fault. It's like, no, it's on me. And that's a profound step and responsibility to own that, to take ownership for our lives. And so once that happened, something shifted and my life started shifting. And it was a process and step by step process. But from that moment, I realized, look, just because I'm in the U.S. oprah's not going to come knock on my door and say, hey, Koot, I've been looking for you. Deepak Chopra is not going to knock on my door and say, hey, I heard you've been reading my books. Or no one's going to knock on my door and say, hey, you need to lose £20. I'm going to go to the gym. When you sleep and feel sorry for yourself. And I'm going to work out so you can lose the weight. It's not going to happen. So I realized, wait a second. If I've come to the US to meet the Chopras, the Jack Canfields of the world, then I need to do my part. And what I literally did, Laurie, was I went and I knocked on their doors. I went and I had no money, and I literally harassed them at their seminars. I went to their offices, to their homes, and I said, hey, here I am. And I just showed up, and I just put myself out there, and you could say I just took responsibility. And it was amazing. Many of them sat me down and I had a conversation. Like, days after my sort of giving up victimhood experience, I went to Jack Campbell's office. They said he wasn't there. Sorry, Jack's not here. And I'm like, I'm not leaving. I've been reading Jack since I was 13. I'm not leaving. I'm not leaving. It was kind of like, doesn't he know who I am? You know, I'm not leaving until I speak with him. And they realized, God, this kid's crazy. And all of a sudden, this guy walks out because there was a commotion. There's Jack Canfield. And Jack was like, you know, I was overhearing the conversation. Why don't you come into my office? And just like that, one hour of a conversation 18, 19 years ago. It was just very simple advice he gave me, but it sent me on a path and totally transformed my life. He said, go do these things. If you want to be a speaker, go do this. Go to this seminar. Go here, read these books, Go here, find this person. Boom, boom. And I went and did all those things and just changed my life. So for me, it was the willingness to take ownership and give up and tell on that one was huge. And it was really, really profound.

First of all, I love that because Jack is a big mentor of mine, so I can actually picture the whole scenario going down. Second of all, this story is so amazing because this is like people thinking. I mean, you went straight to the source, right? You went directly to the source. And I think so many people are fearing all the steps even before that. And what you did was went straight to the source. Were like, okay, well, worst case scenario, they can kick me out. Or worst case scenario, I don't get a meeting. Or worst case scenario, X, Y, and Z. And we could go down that path and you could freak yourself out. And I'm sure you were nervous, but the Thing is, is that look at how it all turned out for everybody. So many people are willing to help. And worst case scenario, I mean, for the most part, when I hear these stories, because, you know, I go to events all the time and I hear these stories of people just like you who have. Have just been so, like, they're. This is. Their mission is to figure it out. And all of the people, all of the mentors, they're like, so excited to sit down and share because this person went above and beyond. So I'm telling you, if you go above and beyond to go and meet people, meet your mentors, go to these events, like, like, they're excited. Because I would love if someone like you came up to me at my event and I was like, oh, my gosh, this person is, is like really taking this and running with it. Right, so what were some things you did right before? Did you have those moments of, what am I doing? I'm freaking out, or was your back already just so against the wall that this was all you could see?

You mean before I took that?

Yes, before you would go in and meet people?

Oh, just before. I mean, I. Yeah, I mean, I was. Of course, I was a little nervous, you know, I mean, I showed up at Campbell's office, I'm like, oh, okay, what do I do? I mean, what else? Like, I feel we have to be bold. We have to be bold in our lives, you know, just to kind of take a sidestep. Just like a few years after that, I decided I wanted a TV show. Okay? Like, I wanted to be the next Oprah. I wanted a TV show. And the challenge is, I didn't know anyone. I didn't know anyone. I didn't even know there was a thing called Hollywood. I didn't come to LA for media. I just wanted to help people. But I also figured out, wow, there's this thing called media and television and Oprah. So I did the same thing. I went and tracked down the top agents in la. Most of them laughed me out of their offices. Literally laughed me. I mean, when I say laughed, laughed me out of their offices, escorted me out of their offices with security. You know, it was embarrassing. And what we have to do, I feel, to follow our dream is be willing to look stupid, be willing to give up our ego. And one of the things I find is our ego is what gets in the way of our willingness to put ourselves out there. And what I had to understand was their rejection of me, wasn't of me, and it wasn't even Personal. And I had to let that go and really cultivate the inner understanding. They don't really know me yet, and they don't know who I am. So what they're rejecting is not me. Because when I get caught up in me, then, yeah, I get nervous. But what really helped me, too was this deep feeling of a dream. I felt, Laurie, I felt this dream. I felt like I wanted to help. And what I acknowledged, that really shifted everything that, yeah, I was a little nervous, but it's what moved me through my own, like, stuff was the realization was two things, a couple of things. The dream that I had, and this goes for everyone, the dream chose me. Our dreams, I believe, choose you. Your dreams are choosing you because you're the perfect person to fulfill those dreams and those visions based on your experience, your trauma, your success, your heartbreak, your ups, your downs, everything you've gone through has made you the perfect person to fulfill that vision. That's why you have the dream and to trust that. Second thing I realize is, look, this dream doesn't belong to me. It's not even like my dream. The TV show idea, the book idea, when we get caught up in like, this is mine, the ego wants to hold onto it, take ownership of it, of my vision, my business. And then that's when the contraction happens, because then the ego thinks I'm in control and I have to do. And it's a small I. It's a very limited, finite capacity that our ego has. And what I realized is our ego can only take us so far. So once I realized that, I thought, well, the true thing is the dream shows me the dream doesn't even belong to me. It belongs to life and the dream. And I'm just the vessel. I'm simply the vessel for the vision of life, consciousness, the divine life force, whatever you want to call it, the universe to manifest this vision through. We are just the vessel to execute, to carry out the vision. And all we have to do is say yes and allow ourselves to be used. So you could say, once I got myself out the way and I took my ego out of it, like, it's not mine. I'm just. It's bigger than me. Then it kind of freed me up. I'm not saying the rejection was pleasant, but it kind of freed me up to say, okay, I just have to show up and do my part. Because if I've been given this vision, inherent in any vision is also the seed for its fulfillment. So there has to be someone who's going to say yes. There has to be someone who I have a sole agreement with that has already agreed to bring this vision with me into manifestation. So I just have to find that person. That's it. And those that say, no, I don't have the agreement with, and I'm not going to pretend to know who that person is. And I tracked down the head of caa, the head of Willie Morris, on and on. I tracked down billionaires, Richard Branson. I had an experience with Branson, tracked him down on the street in the conference, tracked down Steven Spielberg, which is in my book. It's a story in my book. I mean, it's a crazy story. He tracked him down in a park on a Saturday morning. I mean, because I was possessed with. It's almost like the dream had me. I allowed myself to surrender to the vision. And then what was fueling me was no longer little coot's ego. What was fueling was the rocket fuel, the motivation of the dream. And that's what honestly propelled me forward. I remember trying to track down Steven Spielberg one day. And it's in my book, but you guys can read it there. But I remember putting on my best suit and shaking. I wanted to meet Spielberg because I read his book. I. And he was a visionary. And I thought he started dreamworks SKG with Spielberg and Katzenberg and Paul Allen. I thought this guy was going to get my vision. He's kind of a little. He's a visionary. And I called a friend of a friend who's a producer. He said, hell, no, I'm not setting up a meeting with you in Spielberg. But he said, I have a friend who teaches Spielberg son soccer on a Saturday. I called that friend. I said, by chance, could you set me up with a meeting with Spielberg? He said, hell, no. I said, by chance, can you tell me where the soccer games happen? And he said, you cannot repeat this. The soccer games happen at this location in la. I said, thank you enough, Sid. And I showed up. I had one suit, Laurie. And I showed up. And I was shaking. I mean, when I say shaking, I was shaking all the way. I got out of my car, trembling, trembling. And my mind is saying, you're crazy. Go home. Go home. You're crazy. Don't do it. You're crazy. Don't. And that first week, he wasn't there. I was like, thank God. The next week, my soul's bringing me back, shaking. I go back, I'm like, oh, my God, there's Spielberg. There's Spielberg. And I see Spielberg and his wife, and I thought, you're crazy. You're going to get arrested. But what, Paul, when you surrender to your vision, what will move you through your own limited self is the vision, is the soul. And that's what I couldn't stop myself. And it wasn't me. Yeah, I was afraid. But despite my fear, what was coming through was the energy of that vision. And it pulled me, and I literally hid behind a tree. And when he came out, I jumped out of the tree and I started, there's like 40 people thinking, I'm about to kill Steven Spielberg. And eventually started pitching him, and, you know, cut short. He realized, this guy is kind of passionate. And I reminded him of himself, and he set up some meetings for me. It was amazing. But when we surrender to what's bigger than ourselves and what's bigger than ourselves, I want to say a certain way, what's bigger than ourselves is bigger than our fears. And that's what moves us through. That's what doesn't let us stop short of taking action. And I think that that surrenders what's needed, you know?

Okay, so I want to get a full body tattoo just as a reminder to feed my dreams for real. I'm so fired up right now, so thank you for that because it's just a constant reminder. Every single thing that you're saying, your mind was focused on feeding and fueling that dream that you knew was not even yours. It's like if you get a glimmer of it, savor it, and hold onto it. And I just think about all the things all day long that we allow in our mind and we allow to take roots and we allow to continue to feed and feed and feed. And of course it's gonna take over that dream if we don't feed it. And when we do feed that dream, I'm telling you, it's like the days that I really sit in it and visualize, like you had said, you know, even visualizing in your father's church speaking to everyone, I mean, that is. That's the power. When you can see it, when you feel what that is, it. It takes over. It's an energy that literally will pull you toward what it is you're. You're going to do. And it's like it can make you fearless for a short amount of time. And when I say fearless, I mean basically just more bold, right?

Absolutely.

Because the fear is still there, but something takes over. So I would love to talk about your book that you have out, because I think everybody at this point is, like, just wanting Something to hold on to in physical form. Because really, it just honestly, you are such an inspirational speaker that I'm like so fired up. I'm like, okay, let's get some of these words on paper. So tell me about your book and I would love to know, like, what is one of the biggest lessons throughout the book that maybe came from some massive failure?

Yeah, you know, one of the lessons. And then we'll maybe get to the book too. But connected to what we've just been talking about is the sense of we often let our fears hijack our ability to take action. We often let our fears hijack our dreams and our minds to hijack our dreams. So one of the things that I talk about in the book is I really help people get in touch and discover who they really are and is a part of that process. One of the things that really stops people from truly manifesting is we're constantly buying into the BS and the stories of our mind. We're constantly buying into the lies and the programming and what we've been sold in our mind. And so in the book, I teach people because it's connected to what we just said was if you simply listen to your mind, you will live a very limited life because your mind is finite. Your mind cannot see the whole picture, but your soul is way bigger than that. And what I teach people is you are not the mind. You are not the mind. And if you listen to the mind, you will not, not truly fulfill your greatness. In this lifetime, we have 65,000 thoughts, maybe to 75,000 thoughts a day. Most of those thoughts are the same as yesterday. We're regurgitating those thoughts. Most of the thoughts are passed down to us from our parents and their parents and our grandparents. So are we really like. Is what we believe really what we believe? Or is it just kind of passed down to us? So what I have people do, what's so important is realize this. You're not your mind. Just because a thought is in your mind doesn't mean it's real. And one of the things I keep. Let me repeat that. Just because a thought is in your mind doesn't mean it's real. And one of the things that I see keeps people stuck is we're constantly buying into what the mind, the thoughts that the mind sells us somehow because it's in our mind. It must be real. I'm not enough. You're not going to make it. How can you do this? You don't have the experience. Who do you think you are? Don't do that. Don't make that phone call. You're not enough. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. All those thoughts that float through the mind because we're in the mind. Sometimes we think that they're real, but they're not. So many times we are buying into something that's fiction and we're living it like it's fact. So we have to start questioning, is this fact or is it really fact? Is it really true or is it simply fiction? And I think when we can start developing a whole different relationship with our mind, we start freeing ourselves up. And I often say too, it's not just the thoughts that you think are important. It's how you feel about the thoughts that are really important. It's not just the thoughts that you think are important. Because if you just try to never think a negative thought, it's going to be suffering. To try and fight your mind all the time. But to start having a new relationship with your mind as entrepreneurs, as those are up to big stuff, there's going to be fear, there's going to be mind stuff. Oh my God, can I do that? I've never done that before. So we have to observe our mind and cultivate a relationship with the mind and witness the thoughts. And this way, what often causes suffering is the thought arises and we identify, we hold on, we attach to those thoughts and then, boom, the story begins and then we spiral and we don't even realize. Before you know it, two days later, we spiral. So if we cannot simply hold on and identify to those thoughts, but start witnessing and observing those thoughts, then we don't have to be taken down in moments, especially moments where we feel great. Especially moments where we're up to big stuff. So that's kind of an important thing connected in the book. That's connected to what we've just been speaking about. But yeah, the book is called you'd are the One. And it really arose because I saw myself included at a certain time in my life, Laurie. I saw so many of us. We look at heroes in the world. The JFK's, the MLK's, the Bob Marleys, the Muhammad Alis, the Bruce Lee's, the Gandhis, the Mother Theresas of the world, the Elon Musk, the Oprahs. We look at them and go, wow, they're amazing. We watch the award shows and the Oscars and the Emmys and we worship the heroes. And I believe that the real heroes in the world aren't just those that can jump or fly or Will Smith or Tom Cruise or what have you. The real heroes are each of us that despite our challenges, despite our upbringing, despite our heartbreak, we're willing to open our hearts and love again. And despite what we've been through, willing to forgive. Despite everything, we're willing to love ourselves. Despite everything, we're willing to love the world and give our gifts to the world, despite having all the legitimate excuses to not those of us that do. To me, those are the real heroes. And I think we're living in a time today where the world is going through so many changes. Old systems collapsing, old economic models, old ways of doing things, old economic models, old educational models, the real estate market, financial market collapsing. And I believe that right now we are in the midst to perhaps the greatest spiritual revolution the world has ever seen. When we're being forced to wake up to who we really are. And more than ever, people are seeking, people are searching for answers, for guidance that you and I, we on this call, we have a kind of responsibility to step up, to give our gifts. And it's easy to look at, well, that person, Jack Canfield should do it, or Oprah should do it, or Laurie or Coot should do it. But I believe that each of us, we cannot wait anymore. And many times we wait. We often wait, saying, well, when I'm retired or when I have enough money or when I'm more educated, when this or when that. I believe waiting is suffering and it's time to lose the weight. Truly, literally lose the weight and step into being able to give our gifts now and realize no one's coming. Who are you waiting for? No one is coming right now, as we are, as you are, as I am. We don't have to be perfect, but we just have to start with who we are, where we are, with what we have in this moment, and give our gifts right now. No different than a Mother Teresa did. And she didn't wait for someone else to pick up a sick person or a dying person. She could have waited and said, well, I'll let the UNICEF do it or let the bigger organization. She just picked up one person. She simply said, I saw that one person as the Christ. And I picked that person up and loved them as I was would if I would, because, you know, she was Catholic. So if I would, if I would love Christ, I just picked up that one person. And I think that we can all just begin. And I think if we all do that, we realize no one is coming. Because you and me, we're already here. We're here and so the book is a really a bold invitation to stop waiting and give, really give your gifts right now.

I love hearing that because I think so many. You know, we've got kind of this, like, I don't know what I'm trying to say, like a black and white area where people are like, they either totally know what they want to do or they feel like they have this big purpose and this big calling. And then there's this divide of people sometimes who, you know, I can sometimes see this at my events where people are like, well, what if I don't know what that is that I want to do? Am I not important? Am I not, you know, how do I figure out what my purpose is? Like, we're spending so much time on trying to figure out what a grand purpose is when it's really giving your gifts. So what would you say to those people who just feel like they don't even know right now?

I love this question. I have two things I want to say specifically that. Number one, if you're someone saying, I don't know, I have no clue. I'm confused. I'm going to propose that that's not true, that perhaps you're playing a game with yourself. Because if I. And I'm going to just be a little extreme for a moment, okay. If I said I'm going to put a gun to the head of the person you love the most, and I'm going to say, I will shoot them, of course, I would never do. But I'm going to shoot them in like a minute. Unless you tell me what you're here to do, what your purpose is. What is it that person would come up with something. Right? For sure. It may not be exactly, but they would likely would come up with something that was in the zone. So what I found is deep down, deep down, deep down, we have an inkling. We have a sense. There is a knowing, there is. There is a sense, there is an inkling, even though it may not be exactly. And so one of the myths, I think, that is perpetuated in personal growth is you have to know exactly, exactly what your specific purpose is. The shape, the size, the color, the weight, the height, and be able to put it down on a postcard and speak it to someone. And I believe it's a mistake. I'm going to propose that you don't have to know exactly what if you're someone who doesn't know, know two things. Number one, you have a sense, you have an inkling. Trust the inkling. Give up the game of confusion of, oh, I don't really know, I'm not really sure, because sometimes it's easy to play that game of confusion. Because if we play the game of confusion, then we don't have to take action on it and be responsible. If we also play the game of confusion of I don't know, the I don't know game, I'm confused game, then we can always kind of have this big vision that we're kind of meant to do that we feel and we put it into the future and we can always have it as this future hope and never take the action and risk the reality of what it's going to take to manifest in that we can always have it as this future fantasy for the next 20, 30, 40, 50 years until we die. And what the shame is, the shame is we may never manifest that vision. So we have to give up this idea that we don't know. That's one thing I'll say. So there's a deep knowing, and there's a part of us, I feel, that knows everything because we are everything, so. So own whatever knowing is present. And I would say go in that direction. You don't have to know specifically what it's going to look like. A look at Oprah. I'm sure Oprah didn't have an idea when she was simply a newscaster that she was going to be Oprah Winfrey, that she was going to be this worth $4 billion, this mogul. I don't think she had a specific idea. I look at Obama, President Obama, whether you like him, whether you hate him. I don't think he had an idea when he was just a social worker that he was going to be the president of the United States of America. But he began, and he didn't wait till he had it all figured out. Your soul has an intelligence that knows. And what we need to do is simply go in the direction. Lean in the direction. Go in the direction of your vision. Go in the direction of what lights you up. Go in the direction of what warms you up. Go in the direction of your passion. Take a step. When you take a step. Step. The next step. And what's next will be revealed when you take the step. We want 17 steps. We want the next 10 years. Take a step. Because who you are today will not be who you are five years from now. And your vision will likely evolve anyway as you evolve in your own consciousness. But if you take a step, life is revealed and your purpose is revealed with each step along the way. And you will end up living into your vision. That's one thing also. So be willing to live in the unknown and trust. Trust the emergence of your soul. Trust the intelligence of life. Life to reveal to you your vision along the way and you'll live into it. That's one thing. The second thing is a couple of simple questions. If you're saying, well, I'm still not clear, how do I. One thing that will at least help put you in the ballpark to be able to take the step is look at what do you love? I would say, what do you love? What lights you up? I love personal growth. I was doing this stuff when I was broke, had no money, it didn't even matter. I was coaching people for free. I didn't care. I mean, whether I make money, whether I didn't make money, I would still be doing a version of what I'm doing. So for me, I have to do that. So I'd say, look at what you love, what lights you up, what turns you on, what really is just passionate for you and you just love it. Go in that direction. Go in that direction. That's one. But we're going to clarify because, hey, you might be two foot one saying, I love basketball. That may not be the best. That doesn't mean you'd be a basketball player, but that doesn't mean you couldn't do something in that field. So what do you love? Number two is you look at, well, what skill sets do I have? What skill sets do I have based on my experience? And what is my experience? Because my experience will give you the clues as to what skills you have and what you're good at and what your gifts are. Look at your experience and look at the gifts that you have.

Have.

They will give you clues. They will give you clues. My experience happens to be. My father's a healer. I grew up speaking. I mean, this is part of my experience. I mean, does it make sense to think I'm not selling cars? One of the things I did, Lori, when I came to the US in the first, I think year, I was broke. And I'm like, I'm tired of being broke. Let me go sell cars. And I went to sell cars for a weekend. I sold five cars on a weekend. I was completely miserable. It was so out of alignment with. I'm not saying that's everyone's path, but for me, I just knew this is not why I'm here. This is not why I. And my soul was put on this planet just to make money. And sell cars. And I had to honor my unique soul's destiny, my unique soul's code, my unique soul's path. So look at your experience and look at the skills you have, the gifts that you have, because that will show you what skill sets you have that can really be of value. I would say third thing is look at what unique problems you're able to solve. I believe the ability to make money is in direct proportion to your ability to solve a pain problem or challenge for someone. And if you have a specific problem you're able to solve, likely someone also has a pain problem or challenge. And our ability to make money is in direct proportion to our ability to add value. We add value when we solve the pain problem or challenge. So you might not think, someone listening may not think, well, I have this, I'm able to solve this specific problem. But because it comes naturally to you, because you're good at it innately, you may not think it's that valuable. But for someone who has, who doesn't have that ability, it's a gift. There's tremendous value there. So that's one thing I would say. The last thing I'll say is look at the community of people that you have an affinity to, that you resonate with, with. Maybe it's kids, maybe it's animals, maybe it's dolphins, maybe it's elderly people, maybe it's homeless people, maybe it's the blind. Look at those that you have an affinity to because that affinity is pointing you in the direction of perhaps the community of people you get to serve in this lifetime. And if you answer those questions in depth and start moving in that direction, even though you may not see it clearly, your life purpose will reveal itself to you.

I love that. Well, I'm going to have to go back and listen to all of this again for myself because I want to go take some serious notes. Truly, you have spoken life into me and I know everybody who is listening today. I feel like reset. So I'm so grateful to you for that. And before we conclude, I just want to make sure that everybody is able to be able to go purchase your book and also follow you. So where can we do that?

Yeah, I'd say thank you again, Laura, for having me on. And I just feel so. Such warmth and have had such fun hanging with you today. I would love to connect with anyone that feels moved by the work and the conversation today. So I would love for everyone to check out the book. You are the one. You can buy it from Amazon, of course, but also www.youartheonebook.com, if you buy it there, there's free videos, there's gifts. Once you buy the book, just enter your receipt and we'll get connected that way. There's videos, there's, there's product we're giving away, there's interviews. So tremendous value there. Also, anyone that feels called to go to the next level, there's an event I do twice a year. The next one is in December. It's called boundless bliss Bali www.boundlessblissbali.com. and it's for those leaders and visionaries that are ready to take their visions and catapult and live them, live their purpose and the world. So that's also another place and also social media and Facebook and Instagram. Say hi. Reach out. My videos are all over the Internet and we can check in that way.

Thank you so much and I will absolutely be checking that out in December. I am all about events and I think everybody on here knows that events are so incredibly powerful. So that is beyond exciting. And again, I just want to say thank you so much for sharing because I always know when my truth is just reminding me. I'm getting reminded of my truth because I have full body goosebumps over and over and I had tears in my eyes throughout. So I'm just thanking you today because it came on the perfect day for me as I am sure everyone is nodding as well. So I just want to really acknowledge you for being so bold and when we can see what that power looks like when you really step into your truth. And I know that I am just beyond fired up and I'm sure everyone else is. So thank you again. And you guys, if you loved this episode as much as I did, make sure you share it. And until next time, earn your happy. Bye everyone. Thank you guys so much for spending this time with me on the earn your happy podcast. I am so glad that you stopped by. If you could take 1 second second to share this episode with someone you think would love it, that would be absolutely amazing and we would be forever grateful. Also, please leave us a review if you feel so moved by going to itunes and leaving us an honest thought, an honest comment, tell us what you think, tell us what you want to hear more of. It would really help us out on our journey to helping thousands and thousands of people. Until then, and don't forget to earn your happy. Thanks again guys. Bye bye.