909. How To Get The Attention Of Anyone You Want

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How do we show up? For anybody, it's really about understanding what perceived value is and how to value stack in your life. So become the person that has so many things that are valuable that you become undeniable. Welcome back to the show. It's time for another quickie because there's always time to fit in inspiration and I have been shouting out your amazing reviews. I'm so grateful to all of you. I shout a review out every single week now. So if you would go leave a review for me, a five star review and let me know what your name is as well. If it is not in your handle, I would love to read your name and your review on this podcast. So this is from Girls Got Energy. She says, I love listening to the episode number 863 with Lori and Lindsay Schwartz. It was such a great reminder to go ahead and ask a friend to support us. She says, I'm not good with this.

Maybe nine of us are.

Thanks for the nudge to do it. Anyway, so Girls Got Energy. If you are listening to this, remember that that impacted you and that you want to go ask a friend for help when you need it. So I hope that everybody is remembering that that is one of the fastest ways that we can have a comeback.

And I actually just heard Mel Robbins.

Talk about this and she said the thing that has really helped turn her life around and her career around is that she asks for help when she actually needs it, when she's in the problem, not once she's processed it herself. So today I want to talk about how to become valuable enough to people that they actually want to return the favor or collab. And so many people are always wanting to collaborate with people who are light years ahead of them. And I get it. I did too. And I still do. But as I'm looking to those people who are way in front of me where I'm like, man, if I could just get like one collab with them, if I could just get them on the podcast, man, if I could just like connect with them and we could create something together, that would be it. That would be like everyone, I would be validated. I would feel like I Finally made it. I feel like my career would be on this rocket ship, except so often we're not the person who can yet collab with them because we don't have an equal value exchange for them or we don't have enough value to give them that actually is valuable. And I want to be so, so, like, real with you guys. We might have a ton of value as a human being. We might be one of the most incredible, valuable people in our circle of friends or in our family. But what can happen is that sometimes when people have worked so hard or created other people in their life who they have an incredible network who they know that they can just lean on, they know what they're getting, they don't have to give that person extra time and energy or focus. They're gonna use those people because they have spent all of this time in their career doing that. They don't actually need one more. I remember I was trying to get into this group of women who were authors who were probably like three to five years ahead of me in their career, and I didn't have as much to offer them at all. I didn't have as big of an audience. I didn't have as much wisdom. I didn't have the business background that they had. And honestly, they were so freaking busy and already probably most of them burnt out and maxed out and their plates were full, that it would actually be a disaster service and a distraction if they were to take me into their life, because that would just be one more dinner that they would have to go to. That would be another call, another text message. And as crazy as it sounds where you're like, yeah, but they don't know that I'm going to be like their bestie. They have no idea how amazing I am. They have no idea the value that I would add. You're right. Until they know and need the value that you have, they're not going to want it in their life because they're already maxed out. I feel this way sometimes where I'm like, I can tell this woman is freaking amazing, but I can't even spend time with my parents right now, or I don't even get to spend time with my best friend that I've known for years right now, or I can hardly make room to collab with this person that I actually have been wanting to collab with because I'm too busy. So, first of all, I want you to know a lot of the rejection that you might be getting is strictly because there ain't no room on that plate. It's full. It's not to take it personal. It's just like, look, I'm one person. I only have so many hours in a day and I have wants, needs and desires as well that they are going for in their life. So it's kind of like your inbox, right? Like your inbox is everyone else's agenda. When we send an email to someone and we're like, we need an answer, that's your agenda. That's my agenda. That is not their agenda. So how do we actually show up on not only these people who are, you know, five, 10, 15 years ahead of us, but how do we show up for anybody? And it's really about understanding what perceived value is and how to value stack in your life. So become the person that has so many things that are valuable that you become undeniable. So there's a couple of things that people always want and that is there's three. Number one is eyeballs, meaning they want more eyes on their product, on their business, at their events, listening to their podcasts. So this is one thing to think of. And I want you guys to take notes if you're someone who's like, man, I'm just not getting to where I want to go and I'm not networking the way that I want. So eyes. How could you find other people who have larger audiences? Or maybe you work so hard on, let's just say even reels, you start doing one to three reels a day and you notice that you're growing these audiences. So then you can be like, hey, I get all of these people on. I have all of these people and followers on Instagram, or this is how many people watch my videos. Because you spent time not only getting the eyes, but adding the value to your audience so that the eyes come to you. So now you have a platform. So something that people always want is more eyes. So I think it's one of the first things that we can do, it's the low hanging fruit in our life and business is how could I get more eyes onto what I'm doing so that I can offer this platform to someone else? And how to get more eyes onto what you're doing is always to add more value. To think of more short form reels that add a lot of value, that are quick bits of info and do them one to three times a day. I know that's crazy, but if you want this, you're either going to do it or you're not. To all my audience who has kids.

Or a special kid in their life. We know that just like us, kids are always searching for something exciting to do. And from what I hear, parents are always searching for for something that will expand their kids horizons and something to.

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Okay, the next thing that people want. So number one is eyes, number two is money. So is there something that they're offering? Maybe they're coaching, Maybe they have high ticket coaching that you know you want. You would definitely benefit from that. You could purchase from them. And then once you purchase, maybe you can't buy the high ticket thing yet. So maybe they have a low cost offering, maybe they have a book. How can you purchase the book? Let them know you purchased the book. But not just that, because that's something that's small, right? You got something in return already. You got a value exchange, they owe you nothing after you bought the book because you got a book in exchange for the money that you paid. So that's not necessarily like hey, I bought your book. You need to look at me now. In fact, that will turn people off. So it will be hey, I bought your book, I started a book club, I put it on my website, I shout it out and share it every single day. I'm speaking at this small event and I'm bringing your book. I've purchased 20 of your books. And I'm giving, giving them to friends. These, this is how you add money to that person. So not just money in that form, but could you also be an affiliate for something? Have you taken their course and loved it? And now you're affiliating for it and you're making this person anywhere from 10,000 to $200,000, right? Or more. So I remember when I was getting on the radar of Gabby Bernstein. I took her courses, I read her books. I brought minimum 10 women to every single book launch that she had. And I let her know. And I started to become affiliate for her and made six figures on her affiliate marketing, not just for me, but for her as well. So it was all of these little things that get you on the radar, by the way. I didn't think that was little. I worked my ass off for that. And I did this a few times. But this is how you get on people's radar. How can you either pay for something or get more money in their pockets? That's how you get noticed. So number one is eyes, number two is money. Number three is connections. Who do you know figure out what they need? And do you know somebody who could help accelerate their career or make it easier? You have no idea what they're in need of. They might be saying that they're out purchasing a new car. You might know somebody who owns these different car dealerships. Or you might know like a secret way of getting the pricing down. Or who even knows randomly, Right? Like who even knows what you have to offer? You need to dig deep for this one. So what connections do you have that this person might need? You need to start like really being a private investigator on their life and being like, what are they all into right now? What do they need?

Oh my God.

I saw they were going on a trip to Italy. My best friend lives in Italy.

I'm going to work with my friend.

To put together like an itinerary or not even an itinerary. Like all of the fun things that you can do. The people I know at each spot, that is a huge value add. And I'm telling you, the people who are getting far in their careers are doing this work. If it sounds exhausting, if it sounds tiring for someone to maybe not even need it or use it, that is the extra mile. And there's not a lot of people on the extra mile.

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So number one eyes. Number two money. Number three connections. And now we have an other category. Other can be anything from experiences that they want. Like maybe one of your favorite influencers just said that she wants to start making pottery and you happen to know somebody in her town who owns a pottery place that you could connect them to. Or you happen to have a pottery wheel at your house and you're like, hey, why don't you and a few friends come, I'll teach you some classes for the week and by the time you leave you'll know how to make a coffee mug in a bowl and blah blah, blah. Okay, what's the other thing? Education. Maybe they're looking to get educated in real estate. Maybe they mentioned that they want to do investing but they're not sure where to go or look. But you know somebody or you know how. What could you offer? Hey, I'd love to offer 60 minutes of my time. You've given me so much value, I don't want anything in return. Please never expect anything in return for offering value to someone unless truly you come with that exact ask and expectation. So let's say you now have 200,000 people on your platform or you get a bunch of downloads on your podcast. Hey, I would love to have you on the podcast in exchange for something that is of the exact same value or a little bit less. That's how you need to frame that one. Or people are going to feel like it's really one sided and they're not going to have time for it. They need to read two sentences about what you're offering or one short paragraph at the most and be able to have it be a hell yes or a hell no. That's all there is to it. If you send anything more than a short paragraph, they're not reading it and they're not interested. Because as you evolve, the evolution of being able to communicate, especially in writing an email, is saying less. How can you say what's most important in less than words and in less time? People are freaking busy. They don't have time. They're going to value if you don't take Much of it for an important ask. Okay, and the other one is things. Are you someone who maybe has. Maybe you make clothes, maybe you make bags. If you make incredible bags and you want someone to carry it, maybe you're going to ask if they want a bag and in exchange you say for a post. And even if not, if you love the bag, I'd love to send you one anyway. And naturally, because sometimes I won't even. Naturally, if they love it, they're going to post about it and want to thank you. It's the law of reciprocity. Literally, they're going to want to thank you if they love the bag. Sometimes when people write me and say, I want to send you my necklace in exchange for a post, I'm like, I don't even think I'm going to wear your necklace. It's not authentic. To me, it's a beautiful piece, but it's so not me that it feels so inauthentic for me to post about it. And Oprah literally won't even put anything on her list of favorite things if she doesn't use it because it doesn't feel true to her. So truly, it's like if somebody has a really authentic page and that's how they function, you can't get upset if they don't want to post your stuff. So we've got number one, eyes, number two, money, number three, connections, and then we have a category of other that has experiences, education, and things in it. You guys, I'm telling you, if you follow this map and you put down, like, your top three people that you'd love to help and collaborate with, and you just work on this the next six months and keep trying to add value to them and keep trying to grow yourself and get those eyes on your things, then you. Eventually one of these things is going to pan out, I promise you. Okay? I'm sending you guys so much love. I would love to know your biggest takeaway from this. And until next time, earn your happy. P.S. pretty please, pretty please go write a review. That's how it helps this podcast.

So if you are getting value from.

The podcast, I'd love for you to go to Apple Podcasts and rate review and let us know what you love about the show.

Okay, guys, until next time, earn your happy.

Bye. Bye.