Are You Upper Limiting Yourself?

As soon as you decide, as soon as you start thinking that you are going to your next level, we literally bump into a million of our upper limits, you guys, These are things that we create and manifest within our lives and even in our bodies to try to keep us from going to a place that is quote, unquote, unsafe or unknown. Foreign. Hey everyone, welcome back to the show. It's time for another quickie because there's always time to fit in inspiration. And I think this is the perfect time. Right about now, this time of year, about two, three weeks into the new year that we start talking about upper limiting. If you have not read the book the Big Leap by Gay Hendricks, which I can't wait to get him on the podcast, if you have not read this book yet, I highly suggest that this is the perfect time of year to go and revisit this book. Why? Because as soon as you decide, as soon as you start thinking that you are going to your next level, we literally bump into a million of our upper limits, you guys, these are things that we create and manifest within our lives and even in our bodies to try to keep us from going to a place that is quote, unquote unsafe or unknown. And Joe Dispenza says that we would rather cling to suffering than take a risk in opportunity. Right? We'd rather cling to suffering than go and find out what's possible out there. And the thing that I want you to remember is that you are already living in your worst case scenario. You might have a great life, but if you know that you are here to do more, if you are unsatisfied with where you're at right now, it's okay to be grateful while being unsatisfied with where you're at because you know you have more to give or more things that you want to do. But if you know this, I want you to realize that right now you're probably bumping into a lot of upper limits. Now what are some of the forms that they come in? I know for me, here's a few I'm going to name procrastination, getting sick, going back to the things and the people that validated me, all the things going wrong at once and sabotaging myself. So let's go over those again. Upper limits can come in these forms. They can come in multiple forms, they can come in, you name it. Anything that's trying to stop you could potentially be a form of you upper limiting yourself. These are things that are self inflicted that we're viewing as External, but are actually internal because the external is always going to come at us no matter what. Life is always going to come at you, but the life that you live is the result of how you decide to go through. Through the things that life hands you. All right, so procrastination, getting sick, going back to the things and the people that validated you. All the things going wrong at once and sabotaging yourself through food, alcohol, picking fights, you name it. So when we think about upper limits, what you have to realize is the reason that they're coming is simply because you are on the verge of becoming a bigger version of yourself. And everything in your life is like, what's wrong with it here? Why can't we just stay here? Why would you want to go into unsafety? Why would you go do these new things that can scare the shit out of you and change your relationships and change your life? What if you fail? What if you fail? What if people don't like you?

Right?

So this is where we're like, our brain is so freaking smart that it's going to pull from every past experience you've ever had, which, by the way, up till this point, you probably don't. You have more negative experiences most likely than you do positive experiences. So the one that your brain is most trained for right now is to pull from the negative. So whenever you start to spot these things like you're procrastinating, you didn't give yourself a schedule on Sunday night. It doesn't mean you still can't do it. It means that you need to sit down and say, okay, I'm observing that I'm upper limiting myself. I know that you're afraid. This is me talking to me, by the way. I say this to myself. I say this to inner me, inner child. I'm like, I know that you're afraid, but even taking these risks in the unknown is going to feel so much better as soon as you do them than sitting here in this feeling of not becoming the person that you know you're here to be. Then sitting in this feeling of regret, Then sitting in this feeling of I wish. Then setting this feeling of I know why I'm here and I know there's here that know there's more here than for me. So whenever you start to spot them, all you have to do is to observe it and say, I know I see you. I see what I'm trying to do to myself, and I'm not going to choose this and take an action. So around procrastination, something that I have done this year is I've gotten much better at getting on a schedule. I have designated days for designated things. And so I know when I look at my week that I know every Thursday I'm going to be podcasting. I know that every Tuesday and Wednesday, the second week of the month is my content days. I have those down. I know that every Tuesday I'm going to be filming other content. And I know that I know what my admin days are and I know what some of my free creative days are. So I'm still working a bit on some of my creative times. But that's the thing about this is you're going to put a schedule down and it's not going to fully work. So then you're going to adjust the schedule schedule, and then you're going to adjust it again and adjust it again until you have a schedule that feels really good. And trust me, that schedule is not going to feel good for long, and you'll have to adjust it again. And this has been one of the most important things for me for procrastination is knowing that I must get this thing done in this box that I have given myself. Because if it spills over, I'm now into another day. I'm. I'm cutting off my option of, oh, I'll just do it tomorrow. I can't do it tomorrow because tomorrow is a day that I'm doing something different, and my brain needs to be focused on that. This is the biggest gift that you can give to yourself around. If you're someone who can procrastinate or putting things off or, you know, walks around every day feeling like, oh, I.

Just need to get that done.

And you feel bad. You can't enjoy your downtime because you just feel like you should be doing that other thing. When everything has a compartment, you don't have to feel that way anymore. You can just enjoy your downtime now. I swear to you, every January lately, it's so weird, you guys. I am sick on New Year's like clockwork. So instead of me having this, like, killer week in, you know, first week in January, I find that I'm typically not feeling good and I'm laying low and trying to give myself grace and rest. And it's really interesting because this was the first year that I was like, oh, my gosh, I don't need to be running like a maniac the first week of January. I have all year, and I make sure that I am an action taker. So this one week out of this does not actually matter. And I'm really curious if I actually get sick next year, because I did kind of get this lesson that, like, I always think, oh, my God, I just have to be so gung ho, and all my ducks have to be in a row. Not if you're continually taking action, you guys, it kind of is just another month where, yes, you're excited, and, yes, you want to plan new things, but we don't have to hold ourselves to some crazy standard for the first month of January if you're an action taker. The first week of January if you're an action taker. So I'll have to try to remember to report back next year. All right, let's see. Talk about this one. Going back to the things and the people that validated you. When I had a fitness career and my career, I had done all of the figure competitions and bikini competitions. And for those of you that don't know, I did that for. I competed for about four to five years. And on that last year of my career competing, I actually ended up winning two world titles. So I won a world championship in bikini, and then I won a world championship. I won Miss Bikini Universe and Miss Figure Universe in the same exact show, which had never, ever been done before. So I'm telling you this because at this time, I was obviously deep in my fitness career. It was my entire life. It was the very first thing that I had ever gotten attention for in my life for completing. And I want to remind you, I was not educated. I did not graduate high school. I had never gotten attention for anything around sports. I wasn't in them, you guys. It was the very first time I got outside attention from anyone. So this was, like, my validation, right? I was, like, attached to this thing. I didn't know who I was without it. I had started getting all of these fitness covers on fitness magazines. And truly, for me, that was, like, that's who I was. And so when I started to want to get into public speaking and personal development and writing books, when I was detaching from my fitness career, I can't tell you how many times. And I did it a few times, you guys, that as I was going over into being a beginner and not being validated in this other world and not feeling good and not having all these people tell me how amazing I am, that all of a sudden this faucet of accolades shuts off and it's crickets. What do you think you want to do your upper limits? Want to run back to the thing that you're good at, go focus over there, go spend some time over there. And it wants to get that dopamine hit again. Of people saying, oh my God, you're so amazing, how do you do it? Blah, blah, blah, all the things. And my money was tied to this as well. So I was selling programs and memberships based on fitness. So for me to like merge into another world actually felt quite insane. I didn't know who I was. I felt depressed a lot, I was anxious, I felt worthless a lot of the times because I was detaching from everything that I knew and how I knew to get attention.

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All need attention, you guys. It just, it's not everything that we need. We all need positive attention. We all need to feel good about what we're doing. But when we make it everything, that's when we're really going to lose everything. Because you evolve, I'm not going to stay that person. And so because I kept going back, I wasn't evolving and I wasn't feeling good. So I felt trapped moving forward and I felt trapped going backward, going back into that, that life. So I was upper limiting myself to become the person I came here to be on my next chapter because I needed those dopamine hits and that validation. So where are you going back in your life over and over again? I, I literally remember like my career had really was totally booming now in personal development and you know, I had an event and I had all these different programs in the personal development space and it's like I still went back to go do a couple magazine covers which you're like no big deal. But for fitness it's a big deal because you have to prep for so long and so much of your focus and your diet and your training and time around how long it even takes to go and fly and shoot a cover and all the things. I lost months and months of moving forward in my other career because I went Backward, because I wanted to go and get that other validation again. And in the long run it was fine. And yes, it was great to kind of like put that out and get those eyes for this other portion of my career. But I don't really know if it crossed over because the people I was attracting for that weren't necessarily the people that I wanted to move forward with and what I was going to be doing. So where are you going backward because you want to go back for that validation because you're upper limiting yourself. And it's okay, we all do it. And you know what? Sometimes, just like I shared, it can be good for the grand scheme, but ultimately we're probably taking our foot off the gas to go somewhere backward to make us feel good. Okay. All the things going wrong, I don't even think I have to say anything around this. Sometimes it can actually feel like, oh my God, everything is going wrong in my life right now when I just made this plan. Once in a while, it's to give you more time to think once in a while. All of those things that can sidetrack you. I've looked back and been like, holy crap. I'm so glad that those things happened because it gave me more time to flush this out. And now I'm so clear that I'm going to do this instead of or it's either for that to give you a moment to breathe or it's to make you stronger. Because as soon as you move into the thing that you want to do, trust me, your plate does not get less full and you do not have a less challenges in your life. You actually have more. So you get to start your training early. I always think when all the things go wrong, God is like, okay, I see you, I know what you want to do and I know who you're here to be. So we need to up your training regimen right. Just like in fitness, when I wanted to win competitions, I started training differently. I started lifting heavier weights, I started doing things more frequently. And that's because you now have your eye on a different prize. So you need to be the person who can manage a lot of challenges at once. And in the beginning, you're not equipped for it, so it feels insane, but it's eventually going to feel amazing because you're going to expand, I promise. It's how you perceive the challenges that are the most challenging thing. If you can look at it like this is for me, this is for me. I'm becoming the person who can get through this.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

I'm getting the lessons faster. I'm so proud of myself. Wow. I did amazing today. I'm so proud of myself. You. You have to learn to be proud of yourself and say it to yourself every day, multiple, multiple, multiple times, especially when you go to bed. I'm so proud of myself. I'm so proud of you for getting through this. All right, Sabotaging yourself. This is a big one, too. Some of the things around sabotaging yourself, maybe it's food, maybe it's drinking, maybe it's, you know, going back to old friends, flings, Netflix, whatever. And these are just the things that you have to recognize as well. And it doesn't mean that you have to get rid of everything all at once. It just means that we need to start talking to ourselves again. Right? That inner child or that person that you know wants to go to the next level. It's like taking a minute and going, okay, I know that you're afraid. I know that you're scared.

But you don't have to get your.

Comfort through alcohol or through food or through binging Netflix. Like, why don't we go for a walk? And why don't we put something positive in ears or call a friend or call somebody else and see how you can help them? The most important thing that you can do when you are self sabotaging is get outside of self. Get outside of yourself. What's the fastest way you can do that? Go for a walk, ask somebody else what sort of help they need, and help them. Otherwise, our world shrinks when we are only thinking of ourself, right? When we're only thinking of our fears, we actually contract what we're able to see. We contract what we perceive in our life. And when we look outward, when we look outside of ourselves at other people or at nature or at things we're grateful for, we expand. We expand what we're capable of. We expand our energy, and that is when you're going to continue to move forward. Okay, you guys, I'm so grateful for you. I don't know where you're upper, limiting yourself, but I'm sure that you are, because we are humans and this is what we do. So I think it's more fun just to notice it and be like, oh, that's what I'm doing. Isn't that so cute? I'm so good at that. But I'm going to be better at catching it and recognizing it. All right? Sending you so much love. And until next time, earn your happy. Sam.