Define Your Niche, Talk Through Business Challenges, & Manifest Your Vision Board FASTER with Alexandria Reed and Jordan Hawkins

We have experienced exponential growth in the last 12 months and for that we are forever grateful.

Totally.

So.

Can also really be the hardest part of your business.

We have changed completely in the last 12 months. Like, we have cried a lot to each other in the last, like six months.

About each other.

About each other.

Hey, everyone. Welcome back to the earn your happy podcast. I have been moving all week long into our new house and today I noticed I was feeling a little run down. I don't even wanna say it out loud, but you know when you're like in massive denial, you're like, nope, nope, I feel fine, I feel fine. It totally doesn't hurt when I swallow and I'm like, oh, my God. I am going to not only try to get some really good sleep, even though I have a mastermind coming up. Oh, sorry. Back to back masterminds coming up. Thank God we all like to go to bed early. You know what I mean? You start hanging out with like elevated people and we all go to bed at 9, it's the best freaking thing ever. But I am double, double, double doubling. So what does that equal 10 times up on glossy? Because it has so many great things in it, you guys. It's got zinc in there and that is like the first thing that I start to take. If I start to not feel good, I really double down on it along with. It has vitamin C in there and of course everything comes from our gut. So the probiotic is always super helpful and it has 30 clinical studies on the probiotic and some of those studies are based off of immunity. So I'm very, very excited about that. But that's what I'm doing. Doubling down on doubling up and doubling down on glossy. So you can go to getglosee.com for 25% off if you use code happy. And let's just say a little prayer. Let's say a little prayer for wellness and energy and all of the things. As I go into the mastermind, are you guys on the podcast? I get to be in person with these women and they were amazing. I have on here the co founders of Elevate Collection, Alex and Jordan. It's a premier real estate company for clients in the sports and entertainment industries. You know, having a co founder in Glocee, I have Natalie Ellis who is the founder of Boss Babe. And having done collaborations with other women in the past for events and things, it literally makes me so happy to see women in business building and winning together. Plus, it's always so much fun to learn from what's working for them in their business partnership as well. And we joke about that on this episode, about how having a podcast is like built in therapy and you literally get to interview experts about topics you need help with. So it's so much fun. And they launched a podcast themselves. And Alex and Jordan share their meet cute as friends that happened over an actual bad experience that one of them had at a jewelry store and how that evolved into building the successful luxury real estate business that they have today. So in this conversation, they're sharing how they navigated combining their businesses and the rocket ship of growth that they are on now. We talked about everything from communicating expectations as co founders to how having a clear niche impacts your business and how they've already manifested their entire vision board for this year and we're not even in Q1. Alex and Jordan also share challenges they've experienced. Reframing grief as a powerful teacher and not allowing the humble and even traumatic beginnings they came from define or dictate what is possible for their life.

So.

So let's get started. Alex and Jordan, welcome to the earn your happy podcast.

Oh, my God.

Thank you so much. Thanks for having me.

I'm so happy to be here.

So I just got to do an interview and be on your podcast, which was so much fun that you just launched.

We did.

What would you say has been, like, your biggest learning of a podcast so far? Having it two or three months, like, what is either an experience that you weren't expecting or something that you learned?

Therapy.

Yeah, exactly.

Free therapy. That's what so many of the episodes felt like. Free therapy.

What do you think, Jordan? My favorite thing is, is, you know, one question that we ask everyone on the podcast is, what can us or our community do to move your needle forward? And every single guest that we've had has not asked for a personal connection at all. It's all been for the greater good of the world.

Right?

And it's really allowed us to just, like, see how much good there is in the and just remember, like, we all, at the end of the day, like, want the collective to win.

I love that. Oh, my gosh. It is free therapy. It is like, whenever you guys want to work on anything in your life, if you're like, oh, we need to learn about how to do something better with business partnerships. Who could be on the podcast? It's literally exactly what I do. I'm like, I need to learn how to launch my product. Who could I have on who has a product? Like, there it is. Literally see where My life trajectory is going according to, like, if you look at the. The 50 of the type of guests I have, if for some reason I start getting, you know, singers or something, I'll be like, she's gonna drop an.

Album right after my mixtape. But she's.

Exactly. She's gonna drop an album. All right, so your podcast is called the Elevate Collection. Your business called the Elevate Collection. You guys work together. How long have you known each other?

We've known each other about eight years now.

That's eight years.

How'd you meet?

Go for it, Jordan.

So I was managing a Kendra Scott jewelry store.

Oh, my gosh.

Alex and her grandmother had a poor experience in the store. And so Alex's husband called to complain, and I was the manager that picked up the call.

Hey, she's not giving enough context. You really have to dial it back to, like, when you see where we're at. So we had a poor experience in the store, but my grandmother fell at the time and the circumstances that it was rooted in, like, prejudice and like, racism.

Got it.

You gotta say these pieces because it makes it make sense. And then my husband that called, mind you, my husband is also white.

Okay.

So I was like, oh, my gosh. Like, that is. That is not, you know, what we stand for. I'd love to have your wife and grandmother into the store. We'll host a special experience and have champagne to build a custom piece in our color bar. And so Alex and her grandma came in and I got to host them. And we shared a glass of champagne and just kind of talked. And I was like, I don't know who this is and, like, how she came into my life this way, but I need her in my life. So Alex had a full time job. You were working at the hotel. Hospitality and hospitality. And I was like, hey, like, if you're ever just looking to get out of the house or you want to, like, want to do something fun, just come work here. So she worked like two days a week with me at Kendra Scott and I was the manager. So I scheduled most of our shifts together. And we would help the customers and, like, provide an incredible experience. But we would also talk about our goals and our dreams. Dreams and our inspirations. And it was actually really cool because after you left Kendra Scott, you created gladiate beautifully and some of your own personal verticals. But, like, I can remember we talked about those dreams at the color bar at Kendra Scott together. So then to like, watch her do that. And then around Covid time, we just Happened to meet up on my birthday and I'm like, I have somehow ended up in the dental world and I hate it here. Like, never meant to get teeth.

I don't know what I'm doing.

Never wanted to be in healthcare. And now it's Covid, so it's extra challenging. And she'd started real estate and she's like, hey, like, get your real estate license. So I trusted and believed in her so much that I went home that day and like, bought the course. And seven weeks later, I did it. I quit my corporate job and, like, the rest is history, man.

The power of a good friend.

Oh, we're so grateful, though, because all of those things and the reason I had to point out, like, those little prejudices and things like that, because it's something that has been so beautiful in our relationship. And when you're navigating in the tough things in this world that are one, we're already at a disadvantage because we're women in a lot in a male dominated space. Whether, yes, there's a ton of like, women real estate agents, but because we specialize in sports, it is a very interesting dynamic being a woman and then the nuances of race that do come into business for us. And so I always. We never want to shy away from that.

Yeah.

Because it is such a big reality, especially when you work with the demographic that we work with that it comes up. But the power of a good friend is so beautiful because what Jordan doesn't realize sometimes is how much some of like those hard conversations or the allowing me to lead in spaces where I feel really passionate about. And she doesn't like, why don't I want to do that? She gives me such a space and a grace to walk in, a power that I feel confident in. And then it allows her, I feel like at the same time to be like, no, like, that's your lane, girl. And like, I get to. There's a scripture that's. I don't know where it's at, but it's about iron sharpening iron. I know it's in the Bible. I couldn't tell you where it's at, but about iron sharpening iron. And that's what I feel like our business relationship has been. And then we as a collective, as the collection, we try to be that for other people to. To sharpen them the way that we've been able to sharpen each other.

Okay, so many questions. But I want to bring people up to what you're doing now. So tell me you're Both in real estate and when do you decide to go into the direction that you're in now and form what you formed?

At the core of who we are, we, we still are very much within real estate that is the core of the collection, whether it be in Denver, Georgia, all the good stuff. But what happened is that we one weren't seeing like the service being provided as equal. We believe that luxury should be achieved at any price point. So we saw that. And then when it came into sports entertainment, we just found out that that particular demographic likes to keep their circles really small. And it's, it's a very trusted circle. And once we started to kind of play and, and exist within those spaces, and we actually, oddly enough, got into the sports side through philanthropy. We love to give back. We both come from super humble beginnings and you know, like angel tree programs, like we were the angel tree kids and those type of things are really important to us. So we would be in the circles through the philanthropic side. And then it would be, hey, do.

You guys do this?

I'm like, I mean, we could. Sure, why not?

We could figure out.

We can figure it out. That's literally. That gets us in a lot of trouble. For the record.

We can figure it out.

But we did all of that and we were in those circles and we found that those circles quickly became one person in those circles could become. Could make the circle predatory to our client. And so we started to kind of weed that out and we didn't like that. And so we tried to figure out how we could fill in some of those gaps for those people so they could keep the circle small, but still not operate from a place of like, fear and scarcity, but still allow them to do that. So then we started to dabble in the philanth, the philanthropic side of helping plan the galas and different things like that and the events. And then when it came to, I mean, the lifestyle, brand development, business management, all of those things, it really came out of a place of like servant leadership, wanting to allow them to grow in a different space that they necessarily weren't thriving in yet. And so we felt that gap. And then, God, how do we get here now, though?

Well, I think we just. The vision is the vision, right? We believe in, we elevate by elevating others. And so as we continue to meet people, they'd say, what do you do? And we would just naturally say, what do you need? And then as they relayed their needs to us, we're like, okay, yeah, we can do this. And we can do this and we can do this and we can't do that, but we know someone who can. And so we just started making the connections and connecting the dots and filling in these gaps. And it's led to this really beautiful business model where, you know, we are a player gets traded from a team. Somebody calls us. They're not coming to our market, but we have trusted providers in other areas. And they're like, okay, we're going to Dallas. I'm like, great. I have somebody in Dallas who we know is going to move. Like, we move, right? We know that they're going to sign an NDA. They're going to keep your information private. They're going to provide an incredible experience. We can trust them. They're safe. They're not going to be fangirling or hounding you for autographs. Like, they're. You're going to get the elevate collection experience and then, oh, you're moving to Dallas and you need a moving company and you need a new barber and your kids need to know about the best private schools. So we started traveling to those areas and visiting those local businesses and meeting those providers so that when we made a recommendation, we knew they were up to the elevate collection standards, which led to our elevated spaces connection experiences, which are like a networking event where we have experiences. You know, we've had custom hat makers and custom cigar rollers, and we hosted an event at Art Basel this year with live artists. And we're just creating these spaces for cool people to come together and share what they get to do. And at. At the end of the day, like, we're just elevating lives.

So you guys, I mean, you've found a niche within your industry, real estate. What would you say to somebody? Like, do you think having a niche within that has been really helpful for you? I would say so, like growing your business 100.

I think it's been really helpful. But we are also hyper aware of how hurtful it can be because of the questions that we do get asked. We've got like, well, I know you typically don't work with people like me, and so we get that. Like, but can you help me with this? Like, well, absolutely. Just because I specialize in this doesn't mean that I'm not capable of working with anybody. So I think it's helped in the sense of being able to refine our messaging that honestly, as an entrepreneur, it's refined every single day. But refine our messaging and I think it's helped us Honestly, figure out what we enjoy doing ourselves and creating a life that we enjoy. We don't want to hate our work.

Totally as we shouldn't.

We. I just, we always say we want to do cool stuff with our friends, like the cool stuff with people that we like. Like, that's it. And so being able to create a life around that and niching down has allowed us to do that, to really create and build a life that doesn't feel like work to us, like, ever.

What would you say to someone who's thinking of niching in their industry? Like, what are some. Looking back? Because I know you guys kind of like fell into it and it evolved. If you were to sit down with your past self and be like, this is what you're going to niche into. Here's the main things that you should do to really put yourself as the expert in this area.

One thing we talk about a lot are lifestyle benefits. So I think as you develop your niche, you need to be very clear about what lifestyle benefits you're looking for. Right? Like, if we want to be at a football game, if we want to be at the super bowl, if we want to be in the sports entertainment space, like, because we want to be in those circles and do those things, we created our niche around what lifestyle benefits we wanted. And so I think that's really important. Like, if, if you want to be in the gym, you surround yourself with healthy people. And yeah, that's something that you're really passionate about. So really identifying what lifestyle benefits you're looking for and then creating your niche around that instead of doing it the opposite way.

I love that. It's kind of like when I created my product, I'm like, I love beauty and wellness and I like, you know, like, products and people who have created product companies. I would love to be around them in the way that they think. Yeah, that makes complete sense. So you really looked at your life of like, what you enjoy and who you'd like to help and created it around that. Because we don't. We're not going to show up for a job that we don't love. Like, it's not going to last. Like, oh, God, no, you're not going to remain passionate about it. Okay, so who exactly. Like, if someone was coming to you, who do you help and what do you feel like you help them accomplish?

It's such a multifaceted question for us, right? Like, I think at the core, even in, even though our niche is sports and entertainment, there are a lot of synergies across everyone we meet, right? Like we may be helping a 22 year old kid purchase his first home or we may be helping a couple who is 45 purchase their first home. So I think really meeting people where they are, learning who they are, learning what they know versus what they don't know, and then educating them around that process, it doesn't really matter which demographic you are, where you at, where you're at in life. It's just meeting people where they are and then tailoring the experience to that. So is there a demographic we work with? Like, yeah, but it's, we see like a ton of similarities in, across the space for us.

I think if we were to make it broad to try to still answer it, I think it really still comes back down to we, we serve and we help people that are, that have influence and whether that be influence of your own finances, your family, whatever it is, create legacy and impact still because you buying your first home easily allows you to one have a. It's your first time, maybe it's your first asset that you've been able to create and we help you make a wise investment that then allows it to appreciate and then you get to liquidate that asset and then now you've got the liquidity to invest in business, you have the liquidity to invest in yourself. Maybe, maybe you want to get a new set of boobs. I don't know. Like that could be the investment, a new house, like whatever it could be. Or you bought, you know, you know that you have a kid, you want us into college in a few years. And so maybe real estate is the way you want to invest that. So then when it's time to sell, you've got the liquidity to be able to send them to school without debt. So I think it still is influence to create impact. I think we serve people that have influence. No, doesn't matter the size of that influence, that have influence with the intention to create some type of impact or legacy that extends beyond just them.

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I think coming from humble beginnings for us is really important, right? Like, neither of us ever thought we'd be sitting in these chairs today. We never thought we would have any of the opportunities that we've come across. So to, you know, come from a small town where your dreams aren't very big, to be able to achieve things that you never even thought possible, it's where you from. I'm from, like, conisty, South Carolina, which is like, a very small town. Like, I grew up in a trailer. You know, I struggled like, my whole life. Like, in the town that I'm from, like, people don't leave and, like, I am the one that got out, you know, and it's like, still a topic of conversation for me. So to be able to inspire others, like, you're not a victim of your circumstance and that you get to create your story and that the things that happen to you in life are a part of your story, but they're not your story. And you still are the director of your film, you can take that moment, learn from it, create something beautiful, and create the legacy that you want. Even though you've been through those tough things, like getting to inspire people to use their moment to, like, do more and be more and impact the world in. In such a, like, selfish space. Right. Like, it's so easy to be like, I'm doing all these cool things and I can do everything for me, and who cares about everybody else, but, like, to use that moment to teach somebody a lesson or encourage somebody to do more. And, you know, the podcast specifically came from. We were seeing these athletes who'd been in the league seven, eight years. The game was over one day, somebody got hurt, and their life changed in an instant, and they didn't know what was next. So for us, it was like sharing those stories to encourage people to always be thinking about what's next and to challenge yourself to do more. And while you have these moments of influence, to use that to create your legacy.

So for you as a kid, what was the. Like, did you hear anything about legacy growing up? Like, how were you raised? What were kind of the. The core beliefs? Who did your parents think you were going to be? Who did you think you were going to be?

For me, it's a real challenge. My. I mean, candidly, like, I lost my dad at a very young age, and it was a very traumatic situation. There was mental health issues and gun violence, and he harmed my mom and then self harmed immediately after, which led to drug use for her. So at 14, I was kind of ruling my household. I went to work at 14 to make sure that we had food on the table. So I didn't know what legacy looked like. And for me, I was like, I don't know what my future holds, but it will not be this. And it was this grit that was born from survival. And I was like, I will not be a victim of my circumstance, and I will create something. And so now, as a mother of two children, I strive every day to, like, leave a legacy for them and. And to share that story. And, you know, it's really hard as a working mother of two, because there's so many in my life who are like, just be a mom. Just stay here, be a great partner. And I'm like, I can be a great mom and a bad boss. Like. Like a. Like a baddie boss, not like a bad boss.

I could be a really bad boss.

Really. I'm just gonna be really mean to people in the.

Badass boss.

Badass boss. I can be a mom, a really good mom, and I could show up the way I want to show up and be a badass businesswoman and a really great partner. And I. I think the society has told us, like, we can't have it All. But I believe we can. I don't have to choose. I can do everything I want to do. And that's the legacy I'm leaving for my kids. Whatever it is, like, not a fear inside, chase it. You can have it all. You can do it all. You can be at all and just be good to people. And like, that's why legacy is so important to me. Like, there was no legacy for me in my future.

Do you have. Do you have things that still kind of like mess with your brain from your past right now that you're trying to break through all the time? What is it?

It's really hard to like, overcome that hurdle with my mom because I was forced to grow up at a really young age.

Like a challenged relationship.

Yeah, really challenged relationship. And I think that's why I really struggle with self doubt so much, is because I didn't. I didn't choose this life. Right? Like, I was put into this set of circumstances and it was sink or swim. Like, it was fight or flight. And I think it comes out the most because a lot of the situations we get into and we just talked about this this morning, like, I've been able to identify this triggers my fight or flight. This triggers me in a way that I'm like, forget it. I'm gonna figure it out. Like, say less. Like, when somebody's like, oh, you're a little business. I'm like, say less. Like, watch me, watch me win. And it triggers that fight or flight emotion. And that's something that I work through every day. I'm like, hey, I don't have to be in fight or flight. Like, this is opposition or this is a challenge or this is just a moment. But, like, nobody's out to get me. Like, I can win against the opposition.

It's so good that that awareness is huge. Of like, whoa, where is this still, you know, little Jordan, little Alex playing, like trying to take the wheel right now where you're like, oh, it's different. Like, I am in control again. I know. I. I mean, I still battle with that stuff all of the time. So I, I love hearing about your past. I think it's so powerful, which is probably not probably. It's why you can help so many people now is you just have such a diverse understanding of, Of. Of so many. I feel like so many more people, you know, 100.

And that's something that we talk about a lot too, is sure there are a lot of people who we help who come from great healthy homes and, you know, have seen the prime example of how to move into the world. But there are a lot of people who we serve, especially in like the professional sports side, who are first generational wealth, totally. And who, like, who don't know how to change a light or, you know, that you need to change an H vac filter. Many have never, you know, lived in a home that's been owned, you know, so a lot of the things that we are helping our clients on the journey, like, were our journey, like, I didn't know how to get an oil change.

Intimidating to say that you didn't know that or have that, like, you know, because people are. They're positioned out in the world in a certain way. This is an athlete, this is a professional. They're put up on a pedestal. But to not know some of those things, it's like, I remember first situations are really vulnerable and you want someone there who's like, hey, like, I get it. This is where I came from. Here's. Let's just start with the basics. Like, let's start. So I feel that energy with you guys where it's like, it's okay to like, whatever, you know, great. Whatever you don't know, great. Like, let's start there. I think that's a really, really beautiful skill that only comes from our trauma.

It's the truth.

Yeah.

How about you? How did you grow up? What is something that you're.

Oh, goodness.

Kind of overcoming consistently from your childhood?

You know, I think a lot of it was rooted in identity for me. So I. I'm from Memphis, Tennessee.

Okay.

And I'm. I'll never shy away from that. But Memphis, Tennessee, and I grew up with mainly my mother. My mom is a fierce. She a fierce single mother. My dad was incarcerated most of my childhood. In and out, in and out. My dad's like one of the. Have got like 11 kids. And did that seem. Was that like, oh, my gosh, so much instability. So much instability. But you know what's so crazy is when it comes to that instability, I was always still a daddy's girl. And I never really under. No one ever understood why. And I. Hell, I still don't really understand why, but I think a lot of it was just I felt like he was someone that I always seen was able to see me. And not that my mother couldn't, but my mother was doing the job of the nurture, you know, and doing the natural part of all of it, like having to be the disciplinarian, but then also trying to nurture and raise me into the woman that I am today, which I'm so grateful for. And we wouldn't have been able to do without the, the help of like, my, my grandmother and my amazing, like, aunts and uncles. Like, I was really, really blessed in having that village of people in that regard. But it wasn't without heartache or, you know, like, knowing what it feels to like, be. Have the trauma response of hearing a siren and thinking that either is my dad, did he just die or is he getting arrested? Like, that was like a, a trauma response that triggers those things for me. So growing up, I went back and forth with that. And then I grew up in a Christian household, which I'm so grateful for. And I'm still definitely a believer, but I think that it was more so of like, quote, unquote, church that had a really hard time on my upbringing. And not in a bad way of, of the belief system, but more so in like a conditioning of things needing to fit in a box or. This is what made you a good person. This is what makes you a good Christian. This is where your values are supposed to be. The box placement, I think, is something that has been very integral in my adulthood now because now I'm at a point where I just truly don't believe that there is a box. And I think had I not gone through that, you know, likening, if you will, that I wouldn't be where I am now. But honestly, I think the last, I'd say, like, five years of my life have been the most shaping of who I am today and how I show up in business and how I show up in life as a mother, as a spouse. All of that is. I lost my dad a few years back. And so imagine losing him, given the in and out and all of that. There was a lot of identity that I felt like I struggled with trying to figure out who I was. And like, even if I went back to my dad, my maiden name is Jackson. Like, my dad's a Jackson. But going back to it, my dad really wasn't a Jackson based on his upbringing. My. My dad's father died when he was in utero, my in uterus. So my grandmother was pregnant when his dad died. And so there's a lot of identity, I think, in figuring out, like, where does my name even come from, like my maiden name of who I am, my legacy, like, what does that even come from? And so when I lost my dad, there was a lot of grief there because I felt like I had to grief, the desire to understand. And I feel Like, I'm still grieving that to this day of grieving, the desire to understand and grieving more. So, not that I didn't grieve my dad, and it was a really hard loss, but I felt like I grief in the last five years has taught me more than any book, any degree, any. Anything else could have ever taught me. And losing my grandfather last year, it was kind of that. That additional layer of identity. You know, they say that women, girls get their identity from their father. In most cases, that's where they say that comes from. And having both of those kind of die off recently had put me in such a place of just identity, of, like, who am I? What do I want to do? And I think that's where even influence and impact and legacy are so important, because I don't want that to ever be tied or to have someone that comes after me to have their identity or their legacy or their impact tied to. To someone else outside of themselves. And so I just sit there quite often, and I'm constantly going through that.

So how do you, you know, you're a guide for your children, you're a guide for people around you. How do you help the people that you work with or your kids kind of like, figure out their identity, giving.

Them space and grace to ask questions. And growing up, up in somewhat of a restrictive Christian household, we're taught not to challenge things like, if this is what, this is why, this is bad, and this is what you need. That's not why you don't. The why is not important or wasn't important to me then. It was just, you were told, don't challenge. I said what I said kind of thing, you know, Totally. And I think for my kids, specifically, is giving them the space and grace to ask questions, to challenge, and to walk through this life understanding that one, they don't have to have understanding and they can move on without it. And then two, that if you don't understand something and you desire understanding, ask if you want to know why something does this or why someone said that to you, then ask them. So I think just giving them space and grace to challenge and ask questions.

I love that. So you guys were. Were telling me, you know, you traveled in for this podcast and we had done my interview and we kind of chatted in between, and you were saying how right now, for where you're both at, like, you guys feel like you're on a rocket ship, but you're also challenged like you are. Sounds like there's a lot of changes, whether it's in, you know, the business or in your relationships or things in your life. Can you tell me about some of the things that you guys are. Are, like, in the middle of right now that you're trying to figure out?

We have experienced exponential growth in the last 12 months, and for that, we are forever grateful.

Totally. So it can also really be the hardest part of your business.

We have changed completely in the last 12 months. Like, we. We are not the same people who we were 12 months ago. And, you know, 12 months ago, Alex was still living in Denver, and I was living in Atlanta, and we were building two different businesses. Businesses.

Okay.

And then Alex and her family moved to Atlanta, and we had to combine our business and make one and then, you know, determine, like, where we were headed and what that vision looked like. And then once we determine what that is, we're like, okay, let's move forward with this fully. But there's been a lot of growth in our relationship, too. And it's funny, we joke that because we're in such close quarters, because we're traveling all the time, we may be our healthiest relationship in our lives. Seriously. Because I'm like. Like, this hurt my feelings. And she's like, I see where you're at, and I understand that, and I will do better to do that. But we are.

Had you always learned how. Known how to process together like that?

No.

How. Where'd you learn that? Where'd you learn that?

It's been trial and error. Like, there are four tears. Like, we have cried a lot to each other in the last, like, six months. About each other, about each other. And even. Even most recently, I was like, hey, I hate it when you do this thing. It makes me feel that way. And then I turned around and did the same thing. And she's like, so does that only apply to me? And I'm like, oh, no. Like, I didn't realize I was doing that, too. So we have had to, like, really, like, get up close and personal with, like, who we are and what our expectations of each other are. And, like, we spend a lot of time together, so just learning and growing in the seasons and shifting. And it's interesting because we've spent so much time together learning and growing our business and learning each other that it's impacted the relationships around us. So how? Everything from friendships to, like, our marriages, I would say, because we don't really. Because we're on this rocket ship, right? Like, we're getting all these opportunities. And when you're in motion, you create motion. And we need to keep the motion going, so we don't maybe necessarily have time for the family cookout or to see an old friend or whatever. But then they see us together, and that causes challenges, right? Like, oh, you don't have time for me, but you're with Jordan, and you're with Jordan doing these cool things, or you're with Alex, and it's just you and Alex all the time, and you and Alex are all you care about. And, like, even in our marriages, too, like, our double date night. Yeah, our double date night. Our husbands were like, do y' all just want to, like, be together? So.

And there are seasons for that. Like, so how do you explain that? How do you. How do you. How are you trying to bring your spouses along without making them feel totally isolated, but understand the vision and that you're why you're doing it?

I think we've. We've gotten so close because we know the vision. We see the vision, and our spouses haven't quite caught up with the vision. So it's easier for us to connect with each other in this moment than to, like, stop and slow down and explain the vision to our spouses. So. And that's something that we're talking about daily, too. Like.

Like, the rocket ship doesn't slow down, and so it's difficult.

So we have to be like, come on, get your jetpack on. Like, we're going. We're doing this together, and. And taking those moments to slow down when we are at home and being like, no, this is the vision, and this is why we're doing those things, because we're delusional together, right? So it's easy to be in delusion with each other because we both see the vision, we both know the mission, and so it's easy, right? So convincing those around you that, like, no, there is a big picture here, and these are the things that we're doing, and we want you to learn and grow with us, but also, like, being okay that. That as we are learning and growing and changing, that some of those people may not come with us, and they may not see it, and some people may be fine with, like, this is good for me, and I don't want more in life than this. But, like, that's just not where we're at. So we've had to pick up some new friends along the way, which has, like, been a really amazing journey. And learning that you don't get everything from one person has also been an incredible journey for us. And really, just meeting People where they're at that.

I think. So, like, there's nothing I could even add to that because it's just. That's it.

But it hasn't come without grief. Like, we've lost some friends.

Oh, gosh, it's this.

These.

Like I'm telling you, these last five years have been gnarly when it comes to grief. And I think grief has been a bigger teacher in our lives than we realized. And I think people see grief as only like, the death of someone, but even the grief that I feel like we've encountered with grieving, the prior versions of ourselves. And what. That what was good enough then is not the same now? Or what the bare minimum was for me two years ago is no longer the bare minimum now that there's. There's levels to this and grief is. Grief has been a very powerful teacher for sure, to the point where, I mean, even, like I remember when I was updating, like, my media kit for, like, speaking and stuff, that grief became one of the main things that I talked about because it has been one of the biggest teachers, like, do I want grief? Do I welcome grief? It's not ideal, but having to take it as more of a teacher and more as a catalyst of what can I learn from this? Or what is this teaching me about myself? Has been the biggest, I think.

And what is it teaching you? I know for me, grief has been really huge too. Like, I used to fear it. I think when people haven't gone through an event in their life that feels like we've all gone through our levels of events. But I feel like, you know, when you're younger, you haven't necessarily, like, lost people or you have a big fear around, like, losing people or what if this happens? And then when those happen, I mean, it's horrible, it's torturous, it's dramatic. It's. It's like you wouldn't wish it on anyone else. But I feel like on the other side, there's always something so big that it teaches you what's. What's something. What was a big grief moment and what positive came out of it?

Yeah, honestly, the big grief moment for me was I was grieving a very. Like a childhood friendship. Honestly, it wasn't a death or anything. It was a childhood friendship and it had taught me. Or it's. It's still teaching me. I'll say. I think it's still very. Something that I'm experiencing.

Fairly new.

Yeah, still fairly new, where I'm understanding that I'm grieving Currently the need for understanding. And it maybe even taps into the, you know, the Mel Robbins theory of, you know, like, let them right. Of understanding that this has. This, this piece of. It may have nothing to do with me. And I think grieving, the need for understanding why someone treated me away or why is it okay for someone to do that, but if I give that same energy back, now I'm the bad person or grieving, you know, what that relationship was. It's just that constant need for understanding that I'm currently grieving of. I don't have to understand why they did it. I don't have to understand why this is happening. I don't have to understand, you know, what this means. I don't have to understand in this moment, right now what it's teaching me. I don't have to understand that. So grieving, that need of understanding is something that is an active, very active teacher. Like they're working overtime.

Yeah, like, geez, grief is so interesting because it leaves like a hole. So like, like, because you don't get the understanding, like you don't, you don't get the completion. Like when relationships end, you don't get the completion closure. It leaves like a hole. So what are you trying to healthfully fill it with? You know what I mean? Like your, your energy has to go. Like, you have to fill that energy with something. When you're in those moments sometimes. What are some practices that you're doing to like get your mind off of it or flip to something else or think of something or a mantra? Is there anything that you're doing?

Honestly, it is just figuring out different ways to love me and not from just like a holistic self love, you know, place, but like, you know what I really love that I gave everything that I had in there. Or you know what? I love that I realized how effed up I actually was in that situation. Like, I love that I know it. Not that I was effed up, but I love that I know that about myself and I have to love myself through some of the ugly, I think. But what I'm filling the time with is I think the self love or figuring out ways that I can better myself and almost become. I feel like I've become addicted to just bettering my thought process. And I like, I can't say I have an addictive personality. So I'm very, very aware of like, sure, it's not bad to be addicted to the gym or something. Like I understand that, but I know who I am. So I'm trying To fill it with things or more so, like, concepts than things. Just so I don't get addicted to. Like, if I get addicted to the gym, let's say I also know myself well enough. I love myself well enough to know that I will also, too then feel like a failure. When I stop that streak of being addicted and going every day and doing that, then I'm like, well, damn, I didn't go today. And then I'll. That'll make me feel like I failed. I don't want to put myself in that position either. So more so filling it with, like, I think, concepts and just the concept of just loving myself. Like just a different radical version of self love outside of just, you know, getting my lashes done and all that good stuff, which I love, but just more of a radical form of self love, I think.

I think we found a lot of peace in music, too.

Oh, yeah.

So what do you call it where we talk?

We just talked. You said the term this morning. Oh, like, not clairvoyant.

Oh, yeah. Claire audience.

There it is.

Because we can listen to the same song at different points in our life and pick up different messages and the music, and we'll be like, oh, that. That. That bar hit so much in this exact season that we're in. But, you know, putting on the right playlist for what you're going through, if we're, like, heading into a big meeting, like, putting on something that really hypes us up or you know, if we. We are big believers in manifestation and affirmation, like, huge. Like, that is changed our life. And we will talk about that. Like, we do vision board parties. And it's funny because together.

Yeah, Once a year or more.

Yeah, they're once a year.

Okay.

But it's also. We're putting that on a vision board and we're getting. So it's like a evolution.

It's ongoing.

Yes.

Okay.

But we. We actually manifest really quickly. So, like, half of our vision board for this year is already complete.

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I think we're just vibrating at a really high frequency right now. And I think a lot of that comes from the wins. Right? Like when you're feeling those successes and you're getting those yeses and maybe you're getting more yeses than no's and you're surrounding yourself with the right circle and the right people that you're just vibrating at this, at this higher energy. And like we just had somebody, well, our connection, experiences, events. We've had people like, like fly to all three or four of them, which is like super impactful and powerful. Or like we just had somebody fly to Atlanta just to do the podcast with us for the day. For the day.

Wow.

Or you know, had somebody told us like, I love to be around you, I love to be in your energy and your auras. I think surrounding us ourselves are those people who are at those higher frequencies and the doers and the believers and the dreamers allow us to like manifest those opportunities faster.

What do you think you guys are personally doing to keep your frequency at up? Because you're like, oh, we're just vibrating high. What makes you do that every day? Because I know, I know you don't have great days every day. So how do you get back to it? Like, what are the practices?

I, I think some of the concepts that we've implemented into our business is what is for us will not pass us.

Yeah.

And we've had to get like really fine with that.

So you say that all the time. If things pass you, you're like, okay.

The path is perfect.

The path is perfect.

So you don't dwell. So for people listening, like, because negative happens all the time, you don't.

That's.

You just repeat the mantra and move on.

Yep. And for you, you said this all the time. Just because it's a. Doesn't mean it's oh, like delayed or.

Like denial doesn't mean. Or denial can just be delay. But also, I don't do well with rejection. So to me, I don't really get rejected. I'm just like, oh, it's a no from you. But it's either means I need to delay it. I need to reevaluate. And not through you. I need to go this way or need to go that. It's kind of like a diversion.

So not now. But not no.

Yeah, but not no. I don't believe in no love that.

So just kind of. If not this. The path is perfect. So if. If this door is closed for whatever reason, we're just not supposed to be there. And we've had to get really comfortable with that. And being like, that's not our way right now. But it doesn't mean that it's not an opportunity for us in the future. And it's actually really crazy because we just had a podcast get guest on who we were introduced to 12 months ago, and we sent them our deck and we talked about a pitch, and we didn't even know what we were going to pitch in the moment. Like, our business was like, in the infancy and like, nothing ever came of it. Right. We met someone else who knew them and we came back into contact with each other and it was our moment. It was power in that moment. So I think that's the prime example of like, not right now, but not no.

Right. And now you were set up through someone else, but it's now like a warmer connection. I know. I love that. That's. It's. It's so powerful to believe that because there are so many things looking back on my journey that I know you guys can think about in your head where if the thing you wanted would have happened, it would have either been really bad for your personality trai, like, it just wouldn't have worked. Right. Or maybe that person isn't a great fit and you were kind of chasing them. Yeah. It's so interesting to see those things that the path is perfect. That is such a great. I'm going to steal that.

Take it. Run with it.

Make a T shirt. I will.

Okay, so you had. You guys had said Something when you, when we were chatting in between podcasts and you had said, you know, just getting really, getting to know people and asking them a question instead of, hey, how are you? Like keeping things very surface. You said one of your favorite questions to ask are, how are your head and your heart? Tell me where that came from.

It came from, actually a friend of mine, she, oddly enough, she's a therapist, but she was a really great resource for me personally when I was working in leadership for a non profit organization. And I was always that person who, when it was showtime, it was showtime. So I could have boohooed in my office beforehand, but when I opened the door to go greet the people and be hello and be the face and do it, do my job, you'd have no idea.

Yeah.

And then I remember one time she walked back with me into my office and she's like, hey, how are you? I'm like, I'm good, how are you? And she's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. How's your head and how's your heart? And from then on I was like, excuse me, like, what do you mean?

That's a little personal.

Like, like, what do you mean? But, but there was so much care and intention and it was such a big curveball from how are you? It doesn't seem like it is, but it was such a big curveball from how are you? And when I asked her like years later about like, why? And she was like, because sometimes the head and the heart are not aligned and being okay with them not being aligned is something you're going to have to get comfortable with. Like your head and your heart aren't always going to be in sync. Like your heart can feel so passionately about something and your head could be talking you out of it at the same exact time. So asking that question has been so integral, I think, in Jordan and I's relationship because after I felt like I took that from. Her name is Brittany. She's a therapist. She's amazing. I took that from her. And then we just started to use that in the way that we interacted with each other to really do a real like hardcore check in. Instead of the how are you? It was like, hey, how's your head? How's your heart?

Well, and it's really helped with our business too. And you. We have had to become very self aware. Like we're growing at a quick rate, so we've had to become self aware.

Like, you can't sweep stuff under the rug, it won't work.

Yeah, so it's been really great. I'm feeling this way. How's your head? How's your heart? Like, yeah, up here. I know. Like, it wasn't personal. I know you didn't wake up this morning and say, I'm gonna, like, really mess with Jordan's energy today. So, like, my head knows that this isn't what it is, is. But the way my heart is reacting in this moment's in a different spot. And we've gotten really good about being like, I need to take a beat. Like, I'm feeling this way, but it's not on you. Like, this isn't something you're doing. This is a trigger for me. So being able to have that conversation, like, how's your head and how's your heart? Like, leads to a deeper conversation, right? It's not like, no, it's fine. No one is just sitting back and, like, just shutting up to keep the peace. Like, we're really having to, like, have the conversation to being like, no, like, like, really, how are we moving forward through this?

But the difference with that Jordan taught me in that whole process when we were getting real is I always assume positive intent. So that's the. Knowing the head is the logical part of, like, I know it wasn't her intent to mess me up today or to be this kind of way. So always assuming positive intention with the action behind, however the impact. However the impact came to be just because. Because she had the intention of telling me so I could think about it for future conversations. It may have impacted me in a way that made me feel self conscious or whatever the emotion it elicited, but I know that wasn't her intention to make me feel that way, though it was the impact. The intention was pure because that's what I need to talk to her about, is what was the intention? I know it was pure, but what was it? And then that kind of helps us work through this next piece.

But honestly, that's become like a huge business practice for us. Even as we look at our social media, as we plan events, as we plan our next steps, like, what is the intention behind this? If I send this text message to this client, what is my intention? What if I post this to my story? What's your intention behind that? Like, are you sharing an impactful moment? Are you showing off? Are you, like, proving something? Like, what is the intention? And going into decisions that we make, questioning ourselves about what the intention are has saved us a lot of heartache and I feel like has pushed our needle forward Faster.

Agreed.

It's such a good direction, too. Like, even when you're. You just made me think of it. When you're posting to Social, like, sometimes they're like, oh, God, we just need to get content up, or, oh, God, the business just needs to do this. Like, more mindless than actually making yourself know what you're doing and maybe enjoy the process even a little more because you have some intention behind it. What do you guys do around expectation of each other? How do you.

How do you chat about that, working through it? Honestly, I feel like it's something that we're constantly working through because of our mind of, well, I thought you were going to do this and having an expectation. So we've been really intentional about creating systems as of late to not assume an expectation, but voice it and put it down somewhere immediately.

So when you guys go into projects, do you try to fully own each, like, each job or what does that look like when you're going into a new project together?

We're both neurodivergent, but our superpowers are different. So it's been really interesting, right? Like, we're unique and that we're both visionaries, right? Like, we're talking about a conference. We can see the conference play, like a movie reel. Like, we can see the people in the seats. We can see what the arch looks like the speakers are sitting in front of, and we share that same vision. But when it comes to putting pen to paper and actually getting tasks done, like, Alex is incredibly organized and does these things, and I store things in my mind. So we've really had to, like you said, all the time. We have to acquiesce to each other. And I'm like, I'm trying to do this checklist. Like, it's just not a natural thing for me to, like, complete a checklist. But she really thrives in that. So really divvying out those tasks. But one thing that's been really important to us is we know that the first thing we do every morning when we start our workday is to talk to each other. And we're like, here's my to do list. Here's my to do list. These are the things I'm working on so that we're not doing the same task twice or communicating with someone the wrong way. And we're really trying to play into each other's superpowers. So that one, your cup is full, right? Like, I hate graphic design. I'm really bad at it. It'll take me 25 hours to do it. Alex is really good at it and she can knock it out really quick. Quick. So if we play into her superpower in that or. This is a big one for us. In real estate, Alex hates to drive, but I don't mind. And Alex is really good at the admin work. So I'm like, I will drive that four hour drive and you can work in the passenger seat doing the admin stuff, which I hate. So really talking about, like, what fills your cup and making sure that I talk about this a lot. But in marriage counseling, the pastor who we worked with said that in life, life, every relationship, your business, your personal, your marriage, your children is like a bank account. So you. There are always going to be withdrawals, right? Somebody's going to make you mad, somebody's going to do it wrong, Somebody's going to. There's going to be withdrawals. So you have to make sure you're making enough little deposits into that bank account so that when there's a withdrawal, you don't overdraft the account. Because once you overdraft that account, it is so hard to dig yourself out of the hole. Because every time you hit another overdraft, you're getting a 20% fee. All of a sudden you're $1,000 in the hole and there aren't enough little deposits to, to get you back to zero. And to be able to get back to that baseline, for that to be such a challenge, like, we have to make sure we're making little deposits. So by letting people play into their superpowers and do the things that they're good at and like, taking the driving off of her plate has been a way that, like, we've really been able to strengthen each other in our partnership.

Oh, man, I love that so much. It's such a great analogy and so true. And it really makes you think about, about how much you have to. How much work you have to put into the relationship to make it great. And it sounds like you guys are working really, really hard on knowing that together is like, of course your magic alone, but like, together in this business, it's really powerful to have you have this be like the heart and soul of, of all of it. So what do you, what are you both most excited about right now?

Oh, goodness. I'm excited about our podcast. And I think the reason I'm excited about our podcast is I think there's so many stories that are just waiting to be told, and I think there is going to be at least one set of ears that hears an episode, and it changes their life. So I'm so excited to hear the stories, share the stories, and just hope and pray that it meets the ears of one person. And I think that's what I'm most excited about.

What about you?

And we. I mean, we talk about the podcast being therapy, and I think it does heal a little bit of us. Every time we do it, every time we hear a different story, we get those mic drop moments and we put those things into our back pocket. We're evolving with our guests, and we're, like, in a constant state of mastermind. So we're learning and growing and doing better every single day. And for, for me, it's to make that impact, to make that change, and to continue to, like, put good out into the world and rewrite our stories and inspire others to do the same and just, like, inspire, like, hope and peace and change. I know it sounds so, like, woo, woo. But, like, we truly think, like, there's room for everybody. We can win. We'll share the recipe because we know at the end of the day, like, we are the secret sauce in our business, right? Like, we can be making the same exact pie, but yours is never going to be my pie. Like, because what we're doing is. Is for us and what you're doing is for you, but that doesn't mean that we can't go further together.

And I'm gonna eat half the ingredients before it goes in the pie, so.

Oh, my gosh.

A little different.

Like, cookie dough. God.

Food is a love language.

I'm saying. Really.

It really is. Everyone. Okay? So you asked me how you could help me. How can I help you? How can our listeners contribute?

Jordan, I. I always defer to Jordan on this because I get so long winded. And this is our. I get, like, excited and, like, what I'm doing right now. So I let Jordan answer this question first because I feel like you're always, always. The answer is always perfect for whatever season we're in.

I mean, just show up for other people, right? Be interested. I mean, yeah, be interested. Not interesting. Like, share love and light with the world. Like, do something kind. Alex and I, it's funny, we take this approach every day. Even before we walked in here, I was like, are you ready for the next day of the rest of our life? Like, the first day of the rest of our lives, but we experience the first day of the rest of our lives every day of our lives, every day. And we go into the world as the happiest day of our lives because we know that we have lived through our darkest days and nothing that we are going to go through is going to be harder than what we've been through. Because as we grow, each day we're equipped with more tools. So just share love and light, be a light, inspire, change, leave a legacy. Like, just elevate yourself by elevating others.

I love that. Where can we find you guys? Follow you podcast?

Yeah, you can follow us on social media, of course, Instagram. We are Alexandriaread Co and JordanHawkins Co on like everything. And then the collection. As far as the podcast, what is the podcast handle? We just separated it from the collection, so I don't want to mess it up.

I'll put it in the show notes. Yeah, you guys can pop down.

She's like, I don't know what you.

Guys can pop down to the show notes. I'll make sure that that is all in there. So there you go.

But ElevateCollection Co is the overall collection, so still amazing.

Well, I'm so glad that you guys came on and just hearing about your journey separate and together and how you guys just communicate and collaborate together is so powerful for people, whether it's a business partnership or a friendship or a marriage. Like this was all such valuable advice. I'm so grateful for you.

We're so grateful and thank you for the opportunity.

Lori, thanks for having you so much. And you guys make sure you go find and follow them and check out the podcast for sure. Rate, review, subscribe if you can. And until next time, earn your happy. Bye, everyone.

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