Elevate Your Goals, Shrink Challenges & Embrace Success

Comparison, your internal comparison of what you once took on to what you're willing to take on now is what will minimize your past challenges that once felt like big challenges.

And we're back with another episode of He Said, she Said. And this morning, I asked Chris a question that I want to share with you guys because I really want you to ponder this in your life, because you have a version of this, and there's also a version of this that we are always striving to attain even more. And I asked him, I said, okay, so a lot of the things that you have to do in a day or the things that you used to get really stressed out over aren't even a thing anymore. You just do them without even thinking about it. You do them without resistance. You do them without reactions. The things that used to stress you out or feel like huge deals or looking in your calendar and going, oh, my God, I have eight coaching calls today. Like it's not a thing anymore. Where in the past that would have been more stress than we could have possibly handled. So we were sitting here thinking about capacity and pondering, how does that happen?

I was going to say we talked about capacity several episodes back, right? Like, capacity is kind of like your muscles. The more you go to the gym and the more you add weight, the stronger your muscles get. Well, capacity does the same thing. The more you take on challenging things with repetition, the things that once seemed challenging are no longer as challenging because you built your capacity. So people can go back and kind of listen to some of the episodes on capacity. But I think what we were really talking about, this is really where our episodes come from, is whatever we talk about at dinner, whatever we talk about on the morning walk, you know, it always turns into an episode. What we're really talking about early was why don't things just seem to bother me the way they have in the past? And it's similar to that concept of capacity, but it's really. This comparison will always determine what feels big or small to you. Now, this means big or small problems or bigger small muscles or bigger small bank accounts or bigger small houses or bigger small dreams or whatever, right? Comparison. And I don't mean like comparing yourself to other people, but take the dogs, for instance. So Bananas and Bonkers, that's the name of our two dogs. They're pretty big dogs, right? Bananas, probably £70 and bonkers, God, he's nine months old. He's already probably 80 something or whatever. And every day when I'm around them, like, oh, those are big Dogs. But then once in a while we'll meet a Great Dane or we'll meet, forget the name of those other dogs that are in the neighborhood, in our Arizona neighborhood. And they're massive, right? And all of a sudden, by comparison, bananas and bonkers don't seem so big anymore. So comparison, your internal comparison of what you once took on to what you're willing to take on now is what will minimize your past challenges that once felt like big challenges. Let me give a better analogy. In high school, I had a job at Hanson's Dairy, which isn't even around anymore, but it was a pizza and sub shop and ice cream shop.

How many of those subs did you eat?

Dude, I used to experiment with what could I deep fry because it had a deep fryer for the fish. So I would like make subs and deep fry. I don't know.

I would love to make a deep fried sub.

Oh, my God, we made up so many epic meals and stuff. But, you know, back then, the big challenge was a crabby customer. Or the big challenge was, ooh, I burnt something. Or the big challenge was, oh, I can't believe how hard it is to close up at the end of the day and do the mopping or do the cleaning. My God, that wouldn't even hit the radar now of a challenge. Like, imagine a customer who's buying pizza or ice cream or a sub who's upset with something rattling my cage now, like, wouldn't even register compared to the size of the challenges that I've taken on now. Same as you. The size of the challenges that you've taken on now and the size of your challenges will always be in direct proportion to the size of your goals. So the hack is this. When you're fighting for average goals, average problems are going to feel pretty damn big to you. But when you switch the goals that you're chasing down, right, I'm building a billion dollar app company. When you elevate the size of your goals and make them so dang massive, then the problems that come along with that size challenge are so large that the past ones seem like nothing.

I remember we were in a Mastermind probably in like 2016. I think it was Lewis Howe's mastermind. He had Grant Cardone come and speak and Elena Cardone was there and they were really. I remember them talking about this. So I remember we were at an event probably in 2016, 2017. Elena Cardone was there with Grant Cardone and they were talking about the same thing and how they have started to have to not sweat the small stuff. Because they said when you have big fish to fry, everything else seems like nothing. Like you actually have to start treating it that way. And so I think it's part conscious effort and also what you're saying, like, by comparison, Because I even look at my schedule now, I'm like, oh, my God. One things that I do in one day, I used to do in a week or two weeks back in the day. So I was on the treadmill not too long ago, and I remember I was running at, like, something really, really low, like 5.1 or 5.2, like, a really light jog for me because, guys, I'm tall, so that's like kind of almost like a shuffle. Walk a little faster than a. And I was thinking how hard it was. I was like, this is so hard. I don't want to do this. I just didn't feel like running that day. And I thought, what's that best way? What's the fastest way that I could make this feel easy? And I thought, give myself a challenge. I'm going to make myself have to run for five minutes at seven miles per hour. And so what I did was I immediately made something harder to make what I wanted to be doing easier.

Yeah. So I think what you're trying to say is, after you did seven miles an hour for a while also in five miles an hour, which felt tough in the moment, felt like nothing.

Yeah. So choose a challenge to make what you're doing now seem a lot easier, to grow your capacity. So choose a bigger challenge.

And the whole point of us sharing this is. I think this is what holds people back from going after the bigger things. Right. The bigger company, the bigger dream, the bigger job, the bigger goal, whatever it is that you're chasing down. I know that you want something more, but what holds you back many times is you think, oh, my God, I can't imagine the challenge of this, or, I can't imagine the challenge of that. It seems too big on top of.

What you already have.

What you already have. But here's what happens in reality. You go for the bigger whatever that invites much bigger challenges. And those things that feel like challenges now suddenly wash away because by comparison, they're no longer large. Right. You don't even feel the things that feel like challenges now. And so this is almost your permission, this is almost your encouragement to say, hey, don't hold back. Because you're just picturing piling bigger challenges on top of your current challenges. What really happens in execution is you're only paying attention. You're only feeling your current challenges at the magnitude that you are right now, because, well, those are your current challenges, but they literally go away. They really get washed away because they become so small in comparison to the new, bigger ones that you're inviting in to hit that bigger goal.

Yeah.

It is so different than people think. And one of the things that I really want to point out is in order to get to where you want to go, you're going to have to do something really big like that. It's like, in order to really start breaking those patterns and those ceilings that you feel stuck in, it's going to take a lot more than just a really, like, a baby step. And I think there's a lot of things in life where baby steps are really important and powerful. I think every day needs to be little baby steps towards things. But I also think that throughout your year, you need to pick one or two big challenges that are going to catapult you past the plateau, because what's going to happen is baby steps can slowly progress you and keep you where you're at.

Excuse.

They can, absolutely. But you're going to need to pick something that every single year feels big, feels scary, feels a lot bigger than you're used to. And in return, it's going to make all of the things that you feel stressed about right now actually feel small. It doesn't happen right away, but you're going to look back over that past year that you do that thing and go, wow, I can't believe how much my capacity has grown for what I can handle and also how I view it. And I just want to share, like, this is a very active thing that you have to participate in. So as you're taking on that bigger thing and you notice the small stuff, you just actually have to practice letting go of the feelings of stress or frustration around them and saying, I have bigger things to do. I have bigger purpose in this world like this. It can't bother me. Just do it. So I noticed that throughout my day, I'm like, yeah, even with these podcasts, Chris, you and I used to talk about how hard they seem to sit and record together and think of a topic, and we'd argue. And now we don't do any of that.

That's the easiest part of our.

It's the easiest part.

Is it funny? If you're taking baby steps right now, congratulations. Because it's better than not stepping at all. It's better than staying in place. So I don't want to belittle that, but I also am going to enlighten you on the truth. And the truth is, if you really want to go somewhere significant, it takes leaps. It takes leaps and bounds, not just baby steps. So you start with the baby steps and they might feel challenging, right? But the challenge of the baby steps will no longer even register on your chart of challenges when you start taking leaps. And it takes leaps and it takes bounds to go where you're really trying to go. You can't baby step your way there entirely.

I'm thinking this in terms of business because right now, you know, there's a lot of people in our world who are letting go of their businesses or quitting their businesses, and they feel like they don't know what to do and they don't feel like they want to do it anymore, and they don't know what to do next, and they don't feel like it's growing and it's not what they expected. And, you know, I feel like we've been at these crossroads, too, in a lot of our businesses where we're just like, oh, my God, maybe this is it. Maybe this is where the world gets bad. Maybe this is where we just give up, like. But that's not an option. And what I do know is that the people who are successful, they're not lucky. They have these moments as well, but they always come back to a place where they say, well, it's the next big, bold, audacious thing and we have to take big action and we have to do something scary that other people aren't doing. We might have to take more risks. It's never the answer you guys want. It's not. It's never the answer I want. Because the answer is always take a bigger leap. And I want to read you guys a quote. My friend Tara Hannaford sent this to me, and it was from Tim Ferriss on Twitter. And he says 99% of people in the world are convinced they are incapable of achieving great things, so they aim for the mediocre. The level of competition is thus fiercest for realistic goals, paradoxically making them the most time and energy consuming. So saying, remember that when we go for the average thing, for the little steps, it's actually harder than taking the big swing.

It's interesting, that quote. I mean, it sums everything up. If you've got a thousand people chasing an average prize, not only is that a ton of competition, but there's not much prize there to split up among a thousand people. So most people starve when you've got two or three people going for the grand prize now, the competition is far less look at the numbers, right? But at the same time, you know what I've noticed? When you go for the grand prize and two or three people going for the grand prize, they knock it out of the park type of grand slam, they end up collaborating. Typically they say, hey, this grand prize is so damn big, why don't the three of us split up the work? Why don't the three of us partner? Why don't the three of us go after it together? Because there's going to be more than enough to go around. And now there's no competition. So when people are feeling stuck, when they feel like their problems are big and all that stuff, I don't want to belittle them. But the truth is it feels that way because you're competing for average and there's too many people competing for average and the competition is too stiff therefore. And if you actually achieve the average, there's too little of it to go around. So now it wasn't even worth it to begin with. I say go all in for the biggest damn thing you can dream up or don't go at all.

With the holidays and the new year.

Coming, you probably are looking around your.

House thinking that you would love to upgrade and freshen up your environment. And there is no easier way to do that than with your window treatments. Nobody covers windows better than blinds.com blinds.com brings your space to life in your way. They have free design help. Other retailers may claim to have experts, but blinds.com has spent nearly 30 years building an award winning team of over 100 design consultants that are ready to help you create your dream space. Always convenient, always tailored to you. Three ways to shop 1. Perfect fit Whether you want a DIY, have it all done for you or you're somewhere in between, choose what works for you and rest easy knowing the fit is guaranteed. So the holidays come fast, you guys, and you can freshen up your window treatments fast as well. And unlike some competitors, the price you see is the price you pay. No hidden fees and there's zero pressure. From blackout in motorized options to classic shutters. Blinds.com has window treatments for every room, style and budget, even shades for your outdoor space. The Black Friday deals@blinds.com are going strong all month long, so don't miss your chance to save big. And as always, our listeners still get 50 off when you spend 500 or more. Just use code earn at checkout limited time, offer Rules and restrictions apply. See blinds.com for details. 2026 is the year that you launch your business. It's the year that you've become the boss. You become the leader. That idea that you have that has been e at you forever that just will not leave you alone is going to come to life. Maybe it's something that someone tells you you should always sell or a store you've already designed in your head. And with Shopify, 2026 is when you finally make it happen. Shopify gives you everything you need to sell online and in person. Millions of entrepreneurs have already made this leap from household name to first time business owners. Just getting started you guys. I use Shopify for glossy and I remember when they sent me my little shopping bag celebrating my 10,000 sales and I literally cried because I was so scared to take the leap. And I'm so glad that I did and that I use Shopify. It gives you all the tools to easily build your dream store. You can choose from hundreds of beautiful templates that you can customize to match your brand. Set up as fast with Shopify's built in AI tools that write product descriptions and headlines and help you edit photos. So marketing is built in too. You can create email and social campaigns that reach customers wherever they scroll. So as you grow, Shopify grows with you. You can handle more orders, expand to new markets and do it all from the Same dashboard in 2026. Stop waiting and start selling with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com happy. Go to shopify.com happy that's shopify.com happy. Hear your first cha ching this new year with Shopify by your side.

Oh, I love this. Okay, well I have girlfriends in business coming up very soon in mid September if you guys want to join me and 70 other incredible female entrepreneurs. Chris of course is always in the room.

They're coming to see me.

They are. Let's be super real. I would love for you to check out girlfriendsandbusiness.com you guys. Hopefully there's tickets left by the time this comes out. I am not sure. We sold out last time in 72 hours but go check it out right now. It is all about high level networking, really finding those other like minded women. It's going to be all about breakouts where you're actually working on your business with other entrepreneurs in the room and also learning from the experts who have been there. Our guests are so freaking amazing this year.

God, it's funny that you bring this up when we did this episode because, you know, you've got these guest speakers on stage that have accomplished massive things, right? Multiple hundred million dollar companies and all sorts of stuff. And when they explain the challenges that they went through to get there, suddenly when you're chasing a smaller, mediocre goal, your challenges that you think you have today seem so tiny and easy to overcome. Because you just witnessed a woman who's just like you talk about a challenge that was 100 times bigger, but then an award that she or reward that she got that was a thousand times bigger than what you're chasing. So it's like immediate, washes away what you think is tough right now and it resets your sights, it resets your goals, and it also resets what you think is hard.

I just want to share. When you are really doing what you are put on the planet for, you want to solve those problems, they actually seem less stressful because they feel so purposeful. And when you are solving problems that you came here to solve, like your soul was put on this planet to do this thing, this product, this business, help, help these people. That is how that truly puts everything into perspective. And when you feel so on purpose and when you feel so fulfilled, all of the little stuff is like, don't sweat the small stuff. You just don't naturally because you realize how dumb it is. Like, I get it, I did it too. But truly in the grand perspective, when you're going for what you're meant to go for, it'll really help you get over it.

So you guys, we're so grateful for.

You and we will see you next week.