How To Make Difficult Things Feel Easier

Every day there is an opportunity to get better at something, except we're missing it because it's coming in the form of discomfort, uncomfortable conversations or things that we're saying yes to when we really want to be saying no to different things. And we're back with another episode of He Said, she Said.

We're back from the racetrack. How awesome was that?

Explain it, Chris. What were we at?

Well, basically, so there's tracks all over the place, but here in Scottsdale area, racing's a big thing. And there's Radford Racing School, where they'll teach you, the everyday person, like, how to handle cars. And if you want to go to race school and learn how to actually get the acumen of being a race car driver, you can do that, too. And they've got a few activities that we've done as a mastermind, and they were so much fun that we go back now, like, just Lori and I and our friends, and we do those. Those trainings, those activities, because you don't get a chance to, like, throw cars all around and, you know, go as fast as you can around track and that kind of thing in the everyday wild. Right.

Oh, my goodness, it was so much fun. Okay, so there's racing, so you can go around the track in your individual car where you're driving. So I got to drive, Chris got to drive. All of our friends got to drive their own car. But then there's also rallies, which is my favorite, because you have to work as a team and like a relay race. A relay race. And there was five or six of us on each team, and you had to go through these cones and, like, go as fast as you possibly can. And it took some skill because otherwise you knock the cones over and then you get time taken off.

Yeah, it's a slalom, relay rate. Anyhow, the whole thing is we're probably boring you guys right now, but it is so fun because you're given these 800 horsepower cars, which is insane, and you get to just tear ass as fast as you want. You get to beat the daylights out of them. And, like, the harder you are in the car, the more proud the instructor is of you. It's the best thing ever.

Yeah. And I think that this ties in perfectly, actually, with the podcast today. And it is. Where are you wasting the opportunities and thinking about. I just want to jump into it with the perspective of what we just did. You know, going around the racetrack, it is really uncomfortable when you are pushed, going fast in something that you're not sure of yet. So when you get in the vehicle your first time around the track, they really push you to go faster, but you're unsure of the vehicle, and you. You're unsure of your skill. You don't know how fast to go. You don't know if you can trust yourself yet, if you can trust the car. And so there's a lot of missed opportunities by not pushing yourself. Meaning that when I was really uncomfortable, I was like, oh, this is interesting. The more and more I went around the track, the more I was like, I'm not getting a ton more comfortable. It's like, you do. But I was observing that I liked to be safe. I wanted to play it safe. I wanted to go slow. And I was like, this is interesting. Skipping the opportunity to not only get better at this, but to find my own edges. Like, I know I'm not gonna flip the car. They already told me I'm not. I know that I'm really safe. They're not gonna let me do something unsafe. And there's a lead person in front of me who works at the track. I was like, wow, I don't want to waste and miss this opportunity, because I know last time we did it, I went home, and I was like, man, I didn't play full out. I feel disappointed in myself. And this made me really think about all of the different opportunities that we miss every day. I have another example about Chr. I just want to know.

I want to ask you, like, do you feel like you played all out this time, or did you leave anything on the track, Pun intended?

No, I feel like I played all out. I feel like I was caught up with everyone. I feel like they were maybe holding back for me this time.

Interesting. What do you mean? The instructors.

I think the instructor was like, oh, I don't. I literally think they. Most all women there were saying they wanted to go slower. And so I'm sure that I got lumped in there. And I'm sure I, like, said it too. Maybe.

I don't. I don't. I don't remember.

Interesting. So my example of this, like, pushing my edges. We've been big on fitness classes lately, and we've been going to Orange Theory, and, you know, we used to go to Orange Theory, and when I look back at pictures, that's when I was most fit. Like, I loved how I looked when we were going to Orange Theory all the time. And obviously, my goal is to get back to that look, that level of fitness. So we said, hey, let's go back to Doing the things that we were. And for me, orange theory, adding that in a few times a week gives me a chance to really push my edge because of the sprints, because of the rowing, because of everything. I mean, I am bent over, ready to puke, like sweat pouring. And I just don't do that on my own. And I just don't do that ironically with a personal trainer. I go somewhere in the middle. You know, if my own is like a five and if orange theory, because of the atmosphere of the room and they're tracking your calories burned and your splat points and all this other stuff, if that's a 10, then with a trainer I'm at like an 8, you know what I mean? So it gives me a chance to push my edge. Like can I do max speed on a treadmill? Can I do these rowing reps faster? And I know this probably sounds dumb, but when you go there with the mentality of I'm going to beat my score last time and I'm a big numbers guy, right? So I'm always trying to beat the 800 calories that I burnt last time, I'm trying to beat the splat points that I got last time. I compete with myself more than I compete with anything else. And it is that drive to beat what I did last time that, you know, makes me leave it all on the table there where I'm about to fall over dead.

I know I'm preaching to the choir when I say this. Like I literally do not have to tell you this, but I'm just going to say it because we're in it together. Running a business and being an entrepreneur is not for the faint of heart.

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I actually was thinking of this podcast today. I did an orange theory class today. I swear they're not sponsoring us, but they really should. So I was thinking about this while I was there because we have one hour that we're working out in the day, right? Like majority of the people in that class, that is the only hour that we're probably gonna do a workout or move our bodies. Let's just think that that is what everybody's doing. And I would observe. So what happens is you run at a base pace, then you do a push and you can do an all out. And whether this is on the floor or a rower or whether this was on the treadmill, I would observe that a lot of people in there, I would say 70% of the people in there really, really hold back on the pushes and all outs. And I know that they hold back because they'll do a hard push and one all out and they'll do one of them, but they won't do all of them, right? So I know they're capable of it. And I thought, where in life are we missing the opportunity to get better? Because we're holding back. We're like, I don't feel like it today.

I don't.

You know what? I'm just gonna wait, I'm just gonna do one. And not only did I think of this, it made me actually not even think physically about it. It made me think about the holidays coming up and being with family and when we get triggered through different things or when we're really busy and people are asking us if we want to go to all these different things that we don't want to do, we're missing the become the person that we want by having the tough conversations or by observing that yeah, maybe you didn't love how that person reacted, but can you let it go? Can you release it? Or we're missing the opportunity to get really good at saying no to the things we don't want to do in a loving way and being at peace with it. Every day there is an opportunity to get better at something, except we're missing it because it's coming in the form of discomfort, uncomfortable conversations, or things that were saying yes to when we really want to be saying no to different things.

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Well, it's interesting. So one of the things I've noticed since we've gone back and really started working out extra, extra hard, right, the orange theory thing and all that stuff, everything else seems easier now. My other workouts, I've picked up the pace of those things. I push myself more on those because they seem so much easier now. Doesn't matter where you're pushing your edge, doesn't matter where you're taking advantage of not missing that opportunity to push your edge. It makes everything else you do then feel easier. And I watch people struggle through life thinking things are hard that really aren't hard. And I'm sorry, but too many people go through life thinking that what they think is a challenge is actually not a challenge at all. It's just that they haven't pushed any edges. They haven't really explored the opportunity to expand themselves. And so the average feels tough instead of the tough feeling average.

This is interesting. I was recently traveling and running on a treadmill and it was early in the morning before a session that I needed to be at. And I was like saying in my head, I caught myself saying this mantra, this is so hard. And you guys, I was probably running it like 5.6. And for some of you, that's fast. For some of you, that's really, really slow. And I'm tall. Like I could probably Run faster. And I was literally saying, like, this is so hard. And I said to myself, if you want to make this easier, do something harder.

Yeah.

So I cranked it up to give myself some perspective, and I said, okay, so for two minutes, I'm going to run at seven. And guess how much easier? Five. I was forward.

Felt like a walk in a park all day.

I was looking forward to 5.6. And I was like, interesting. And I did it that fast. And I was like, okay, we're going to run at seven again for a minute in three minutes. And it was so crazy that I went from the 5.6 being the hardest thing that morning to I can't wait to get back to 5.6. And it feels like a walk in the park compared to making myself run at seven.

Well, I think the best message then out of this is if you think whatever is hard right now. Your finances are hard, your career is hard, your business is hard, your relationship is hard, whatever. I think you need to go out and find a place to explore some much tougher edges challenges, because then the stuff you think is hard now is actually going to feel a lot easier because your perspective changes and your baseline changes.

I'm so much happier right now, Chris. Like, looking back at when I had really kind of like backed down on.

A lot of things.

Held back, right? Because if I'm being honest, I think business has been so much mental power for me lately that what ended up happening is I was like, well, I'm going to go easier in these other physical areas in my life and some other areas where I'm just kind of like, I took my foot off the gas. And don't get me wrong, we can't have our foot on the gas on everything. But for me, I also need to be challenged somewhere else besides just business. And the more that I have challenged myself physically during this, I've noticed I have become so much more mentally capable.

Oh, my God.

Like, if I can just be present for my workout and be like, this is helping me so much, how can I actually enjoy this process and challenge myself and try not to hold back too much and, like, try to push myself a little more. The more I notice I'm showing up way more powerfully even in my meetings, like, I just feel better about myself. I'm proud of myself.

Well, guys, take this prompt. Take this opportunity to go explore your edges. Don't miss those opportunities to push yourself to your max, to maybe fail to push yourself so hard. Hard that you fail, because it's going to make everything else in your life seem that much easier. It's going to make the tough stuff actually feel mundane. And when that happens, boy, your whole life elevates. Thanks for listening. We love and appreciate you. Don't forget I send out a positive money mindset, mantra or business perspective every single morning so you can view the world through an abundant lens before your feet hit the ground. Totally free. Lori gave me the idea because I always wake her up to a mantra. Years ago, almost two years now, a year and a half ago. And now thousands and thousands of you wake up to my morning mantra. If you want to be on that list, just text me the word daily to 310-421-0416 so I know to put you on the list. It's literally that easy. Totally free, no strings attached. Text me the word daily and I'll throw you on the list. Text me daily to 310-421-0416.

All right you guys.

So grateful for you and we will.

See you next week. Bye bye.

Sam.