It's Your Responsibility To Sell

When someone's hung up on sales, it's not that they don't know what to say. They might tell you, I don't know what to say, I don't know how to sell. But it actually has nothing to do with not knowing what to do. It's not having the energy of this is the right thing because of the right reason.

They haven't found their story yet. And we're back with another episode of He Said, she Said.

When I say we're back, I mean all four of us, you, me, bananas and bonkers. I've been getting so many people that are either dming me or like, I'll be on a zoom with them. And they listen to show and they're like, oh, by the way, we love that. You just like, leave the dogs there. You're just owning it. It makes it real life.

Oh, my God. Right now, before they are trained, which they're going to training, they're going away to camp.

By the way, which is.

Is making me so sad. I can't talk about it. But anyway, they cannot leave us alone. It's like when we sit, they all of a sudden want to start fighting and playing. They need an audience. It's the weirdest thing. They just started it right now.

Yeah, they weren't doing this a minute ago. Nope. They were laying at my feet.

It's so bizarre. Anyway, how was your day?

Good. I'm raising money at like a rapid pace and the people that are investing in Frello, my new app, are the freaking best people on the planet.

They are the best people. I'm so freaking proud of you. Oh, my God, you guys. When you go to raise money, there is nothing quite like when you get your first person in and then the domino just starts.

It is the best feeling ever.

Oh, my gosh. It's like when you first launch your first anything and you get that one sale that breaks the seal and you're.

Like, okay, I'll tell you why, though. I like, I'm so confident in this. And listen, disclaimer. Startups are one of the riskier places you can place your money when you invest, right?

Definitely.

But I am so confident in this. I'm so confident in my business partner. I'm still confident in our team. I'm so confident in the feedback that I think when I talk about the investment opportunity, it's coming from a place of, hey, I want to bring you along and create a win for you, help create some wealth for you. The thing I love about investing in startups and this is not what we're supposed to talk about today, but I'll just end with this. The thing I love about investing in startups is it's like you take a chunk of money, the same amount of money that you might start a little baby business with. You invest it in someone else, they do all the work, they go through all the sweat, all the blood, all the tears, all the ups, all the downs. And then when they sell the company, you get a great big windfall as if you built the company. To me, it's why we invest in five startups a year and I freaking love it. Okay, that's enough about that. I've been doing a lot of Mastermind coaching calls lately. People that are in my elite, Mastermind, they get a one on one touchpoint every other month. And this month I'm doing the touch points. I've had two people talk about how sales make them uncomfortable.

Yep.

Like they're good people with good products and they're selling pretty well. But when we really talk about amplifying their voice, like the truth is I just don't like selling or I don't like being salesy. And you've come so far. I remember you couldn't sell water to a desperate person in the desert. Eskimo, you couldn't. I've never seen somebody so inept at selling something. But now you're a sales ninja. How'd you get here?

Well, first of all, when someone says they don't want to sell, it's always something probably deep, probably a bit of trauma there. And you can't really just get somebody to sell by giving them a script or by saying, well, you need to sell. You put all this work in. When there's something that you're not really looking at, you're never going to be able to sell. So you have a lot of realizations and breakthroughs first. So for me, mine was pretty darn deep. It was tied to religion guilt. And a lot of my religion was around if you do things wrong or outside of the religion, you get shamed or, you know, you die in Armageddon.

And your religion was also like, don't make money, it's useless here on earth.

So that probably, yes, it was definitely money was actually not a good thing. It was frowned upon. You always putting it first or wanting to make it or having nice, desiring it.

Yeah.

Yes. Because you were supposed to store up your treasures in heaven. So for me that was like really deep rooted, that it was bad, that it was wrong, that it was Evil. And growing up, I heard a lot of, you know, I heard in my household, like, oh, rich assholes. Oh, they screwed us over. And that was the story in my head. So I associated it to being bad and people thinking I was greedy and having the wrong intentions. And it wasn't until I've had some experiences of my own where I had purchased something or gone to something that I spent a lot of money for that I realized that there were a lot of things tied to the energetics of money and the actual act of putting down money and what money got me that changed my life. But I didn't realize that until it was pointed out to me in a book, which was Secrets of the Millionaire Mind, where I had to learn about what my money story was. So even though I was doing that and having transformations, I wasn't necessarily having a transformation around money. I needed something to point it out and go, okay, you had a transformation because you paid for something. And because you paid for something, you had the transformation.

And so that gave you permission internally to be like, wait a minute, I have to get people to pay for these things or they're not going to have an effective transformation.

Because I. Yes, because I realized.

Because it happened to you. Yes.

I realized that without paying money, I wouldn't necessarily show up for the thing. I didn't really follow through with the thing. I felt a lot of really positive pressure because of the money. It made me follow through.

It's interesting. You're talking about when someone's hung up on sales. It's not that they don't know what to say. They might tell you, I don't know what to say. I don't know how to sell.

Right.

But it actually has nothing to do with not knowing what to do. It's not having the energy of this is the right thing because of the right reason.

They haven't found their story yet.

Yeah.

And it's not that you have to go and get a new one if you're like, oh, I'm selling this product and I don't have my own story around it. Yes, you do. Because I do believe any of your stories that you've had can most likely always be tied to something. Can always be tied to something. I don't know. I'm trying to think of anything that seems random right now, but really being able to even look at maybe a story of somebody in your life who their story even impacted you, and you realized that it was around something with money or sales or whatever, and knowing that even though it Wasn't your story the fact that you love them and they had this transformation? It was impactful on you and the people around them.

It's amazing. I'm thinking back, like, okay, what memories do I have of sales? I've actually always loved sales my whole life. I don't know why. Maybe it's some ingrained upbringing that led to a personality or something. But I remember when I got kicked out of college and I got that job at the car dealership. I was excited to learn the art of sales. We did this two week training that the dealership put on when you're new. And I was like hanging on the edge of every word and every move and all that.

Why do you think you loved it?

I don't know, but it feels like a sport. I get great satisfaction out of the action of it.

What? Well, it's interesting because for you growing up, you right away were in environments where it was viewed as a good thing.

Yeah.

And so, you know, you go to those sales meetings and people wanted to be the top salesperson. They were excited about meeting the person who was gonna teach on sales or the special guest who was coming in. And it was really something that was like glorified.

I've seen sales cause people to take a different direction than they would have if somebody did not work hard to sell them. And then that different direction changing their life for the better. So many times that I think I've just gathered so much evidence that, hey, you're helping somebody make a better decision than they would make on their own when you take the time to actually sell them. If you believe in your product. Matter of fact, I've said it before on this show, I've said it before on my own episodes. Sales is actually a really loving act. Because when you're faced with the opportunity to sell someone, you're either gonna protect your own ego by saying, oh, I don't wanna look salesy, I don't wanna look bad. That's just really saying, I don't want this person to think less of me. Right. That's protecting your own ego.

Yes, you are.

Or you're gonna say, I don't care how it looks or what they might say about me, I'm gonna set aside my ego and sell hard enough for this person to make a better decision than they would on their own without me helping to persuade them. Remember, this only counts if you really believe that what you're selling changes lives for the better. But if you do, and I'm sure everyone listening, I'm sure. That's the case. Then you setting your ego aside, right. How are you going to look in order to interrupt their pattern of normally not so good decision making so that you can put them on a pattern of making better decisions because you took the time to sell? That is a loving act, my friends.

So I love what you say about sales, that it's breaking patterns for people. And I look at all of the good things in my life and it is because someone or something, or a magazine or a podcast or something I saw on TV took enough time to put enough energy and effort into their marketing to stop you in your tracks and say, look at this. And you know, whether it was a personal development event, you know that I ended up going to Jack Canfield. That absolutely changed my entire life. And it was the most I had ever spent on anything. Up until then. It was 25 grand. We did not have that whatsoever. I remember being like, I have to go to this and we'll never afford it. And I felt like it was crazy. But I remember the marketing emails. They were so good that I was like, this is who I'm supposed to be. And if they wouldn't have taken the time to sell so well and so frequently into my inbox, I would never be where I am. I would never be talking to you. And I'm talking. They were frequently sending this email and it was all over. And I'm so grateful for the fact that they decided to get good enough at sales that it reached me.

So, honest question. Do you believe that you're a better person because you learned to become good at sales?

I am 1 million percent a better person because of it.

Unpack that for me.

So, number one, if you have something that you want to be doing out in the world, it can be great if you want to make impact, it can be great if you want to make change. But if you're not good at sales, that dream will stay hidden. It will actually die because, number one, you can't support yourself. Number two, no one's going to know about it. So sales is essentially just getting it out into the. It's selling yourself, it's enrolling. Yes.

To be a good salesperson just means you're a good enroller.

Absolutely.

You can enroll people into a vision of possibility. You can enroll people into the vision of what could be instead of what is. You enroll people into the being open for the first time that maybe they've got a shot or a chance.

You know, I once asked a professional public speaker who just, like, rocked the Arena. And I was like, how do you do that? How do you get people just like in another, like levitating? And he said, you know, I allow myself to get convicted by the message and by the story. And ever since then, I allow myself to let. It's almost like I let go of the fact that I'm telling the story to someone and I get into the story, meaning I remember why it impacted me. I remember why it impacted my mom, my friend, my husband, like what that did for them. And I tell that story with such energy and certainty that I hope that it disrupts and interrupts their way of being and thinking because I know that the way that if they keep going that way, that their life will be miserable.

You just said a really key word. I want everybody to grasp this. This is what ultimately comes down to if you're going to be good at sales or not certainty. You see, every time there's an interaction, every time there's an option to be chosen between two people, the person who has the most certainty will win every time without a doubt. And if you have certainty that your product will make someone's life better, if you have certainty that what you're selling will leave them better than you found them, then that means you're going to be the most certain person in the conversation you're going to win. But if you're not winning your sales conversations, then I would take a good hard look at the product you're trying to sell.

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Is there something you gotta change in it? Is there something you gotta make better? Is there something you don't quite believe in and can you change it or do you have to change products altogether? Yeah, because you should have natural certainty if you were sure that your product was gonna change everyone's life.

Now this is really interesting. I learned some pretty crazy amazing lessons when I was in network marketing because there were people in network marketing, so I had my original transformation from the product. So I was able to really connect to the product and want to sell the and it took me a little bit longer to get in on selling the business because I was like, I'm just slaying this product. Like anyone I talk to. I feel like I can close because the product changed my life so much. So I really learned a lot about sales with that.

By the way you had certainty in the product and not in the opportunity. Right?

So much certainty in the product, not yet in the opportunity. So then when I went to events and I would see on stage some of these people doing incredible things, making a ton of income. But then when I talk to them later, they're like, you know, it's funny. I like the product. I've been in other companies, but I love this business opportunity. So this is what I sell. And I'm like, so you're not really in love with the product. And I remember one woman was like, you know, I would throw this whole product down the drain, but I'm obsessed with the business. I don't know if you remember her, but I just about died laughing. But, you know, she was being extreme and kind of joking around, saying how much she loved how the business was structured and talking about how she loved teaching it and teaching people how to sell.

She has certainty how it would change lives for the better.

But that was the first time I realized that you don't have to love every single part of your business. You just really have to learn how to paint the vision in one direction that means something to you, and you'll find those people who get it, who understand you. So it's not like if you're building something, you have to get them so hyped on every single area of the business, right? You just. You take the one thing that you're like, this is my story, and I'm sticking to it. This is the thing that I love. This is what I want to share. I just want to say one more thing about network marketing with that is, you know, in our company, and I love using network marketing because it's really what taught me so much about sales. There were so many products, Chris.

Right?

Like hundreds of products, and I was selling one in the beginning, and it's what built everything. I was only selling the shakes because it was the thing I had the transformation on. I wasn't taking anything else yet. So I would get on the phone and literally only sell shakes. And I did that for years until I was like, wait a minute. There's other stuff here, too. But I just want to share that it's that stake in the ground thing that you can find. So really think deeply about what it is with maybe your product or your network marketing company or the affiliate sales that you love, and stick to the story that changed your life and start allowing yourself to get convicted by it when you tell it.

Boy. So what have we covered? Having the energy of being good at sales and Wanting to be good at sales, having the conviction that your product works, having the certainty that comes from that conviction, and the sheer fact that to become good at sales, to really sell somebody with everything you've got, is an act of love because you're putting your ego aside instead of, you know, whatever I'm trying to say. It's like everyone follows the person that's so freaking good at. This is Charlene Johnson. She is a sales ninja, especially on social media. Like, I don't know if anyone sells better on social media. And that was evident in the podcast that everyone listened to last week when she was talking about social media, and they heard in that episode that, you know, she said, if I'm going to come on your show, then I actually want to do a real webinar with everybody. And, you know, if you're listening this right now, if the webinar has already taken place live, you didn't miss it. You can still get the replay. All you got to do is go to loriharder.com webinar because in the webinar, she used templates that teach you how to sell. In the Webber, she used templates how to grow your audience into what she, like, gave you that certainty. Do this, don't do that, use this, don't use that. And it's that certainty that wins. So goes, seriously, go watch the replay. Go check it out. It's a bunch of free training, no strings attached. Over at loriharder.com impact is what it was. Lori harder.com impact don't go to webinar.

Go to lori harder.com forward slash, impact.

Whatever I said first, throw it out. Is loriharder.com Impact I just remembered.

You saved yourself.

Yep.

All right, guys, we're so grateful for you, and I hope that we get to see you selling more online, because it makes me excited when I see it. And until next time, earn your happy and do whatever Chris's show says to do.

Love and appreciate you guys. Thanks for listening. Bye.

Bye, Sam.