Move Faster, Block the Noise, and Keep Going When It Hurts

In America, we have been taught to see pain as bad, but pain is actually one of your best tools. It's your compass. It points you toward what matters. You're going to hear things like, oh, that's risky. Are you sure you want to do that? What if it doesn't work out? And it sounds protective, but it's really their anxiety being handed to you and you're carrying it after that. You have to put yourself out there over and over and over and over and take action. Life is is a participatory sport. You have to participate or life will not even meet you halfway. This is where the real ones are made. If you aren't willing to walk through this part, you aren't ready to carry the weight of your dream. Straight up, you guys buckle up or step aside because that's what you're signing up for. Hey everyone, welcome back to the earn your happy podcast. Today's episode is another throwback of my favorite conversations. And you guys know that I've had this podcast for eight years. So if you're newer to the podcast, I have literally recorded over 1400 episodes, you guys. So I want to make sure that you don't miss any of these super amazing, juicy conversations that I have chosen just for you. Because I can't tell you about the wealth of knowledge that is in this freaking catalog of throwbacks. I don't want you to miss it. It's truly what has change my life and helped me on my journey of growth in entrepreneurship, in relationships, in personal development. And I know that these messages are going to hit you in the same kind of powerful way that they hit me. So I hope that you love this one as much as I do. And let's get started. Hey everyone, welcome back to the show. It's time for another quickie because there's always time to fit in. Inspiration. What if I told you that pain will get you further than motivation ever will? What if I said you don't need more inspiration, you need to change your relationship with pain. I want to tell you about a conversation that I just recently had where I was in Arizona. We flew to Arizona on Labor Day, you guys, and did a podcast with Pace Morby. And so instead of cooking out or having a day off, we chose to have have a really big opportunity. And I will tell you a lot of times the big opportunities are not convenient. And we literally flew there, booked a studio and had this incredible two part interview that was about two and a half, three hours in total from start to finish while we were There of this awesome conversation. And one of the things that Pace had mentioned on the podcast was a story about how scientists are working really hard to try to get rats to eat rat poison faster from these rat poison traps that get rid of rats. So I know that right now, if you care about animals, this might be a tough story, but let me just explain to you exactly what I mean and what was learned within this scientific experiment. So, for years, in order to control, you know, the rat population or the infestations of rats, they have been putting out these rat traps and they've been trying to lure them faster to these rat traps to, quote, unquote, solve the problem quicker. And they have been using so many different combinations of every food and motivator that they thought would motivate these rats into this trap. As many things as they possibly could think about, right? This is literally people's jobs. They've tried every mix of food, different flavors, different fats, different sugars, different salts. Some are rotten, some are not. But nothing really exponentially sped it up. They did find a mix of. It was some sort of rotten cabbage, and I think like a syrup or honey or something like that that kind of sped these rats up. But after that, they started asking a different question. They thought, what if instead of motivating these rats with something that they want, right? With something that they think they want and what their body is telling them that they want. But what if we started using pain? What if we started to make these rats be in fear? What if we started using fear and running away from something that they are afraid of? So they took the scent of a cat, and they took the scent of a cat, and they put the scent of the cat behind where the rat was, and they put the cabbage in the syrup in front of them, but they put the scent of the cat behind the rat, and this sped up the rat. I think it was like three times more than anything they were able to do with motivation of the food, right? Of the pleasure. And they realized that pain and fear was a much more powerful motivator than pleasure ever was. And I will tell you that I have done over 1400 interviews on my podcast, and what I have learned is that the most successful people in the world were able to pull future pain forward. And we like to think that we're above rats, but you guys were actually not. What moves us isn't pleasure. It's truly avoiding pain. And the most successful people have learned to pull that future pain forward. So instead of waiting until the end of their life to feel regret and not chasing their dreams, they let themselves feel the pain of the now. The pain of, if I don't do this in five years, where will I actually be and what will I feel like? What will my marriage look like? What will my kids think of me? What circle of friends will I have? Well, I still feel so unfulfilled in my friend group and in my life. It's the pain of saying to your kids, you know what? It's okay to play small. It's okay to not go for your dreams. It's okay to struggle with money. This is how it is. This is who we are. It's lying on your deathbed thinking, I never went for it. It's not knowing what kind of pandemic or economy or what AI is going to do and just kind of passively sitting back and not being prepared for anything. You guys, these things are happening. These things could come. And not to scare you, but I kind of want to scare you. Because pain is the thing that can motivate you into getting all of the things that you could ever dream of and becoming the person that you came here to be. Because pain is fuel. Why do you think when you ask a successful person about their past, they probably have some very painful story that they are avoiding? They will work. They will go through the challenges, they will do more work because they know what they're avoiding. And this doesn't mean that you had to have had something massive happen to you in order to wake up. So if you're sitting there and you're thinking, well, shit, I don't have some, you know, crazy thing that happened to me. I haven't had a major money loss. I didn't go through a terrible relationship. I haven't ever been divorced. It doesn't matter. You. You can actually pull future pain forward. And if you've ever been to a Tony Robbins event, you know that he has this section of his events of every upw. Unleash the power within where you sit. And you think of all the pain that you've ever gone through in your entire life. And you think of future pain. You think of what your life's going to be like in five years if you don't do the thing in 10 years, in 15 years and 20 years, you fast forward to your deathbed. You guys, you pull all that pain forward and you bring it into the. You have the realization that if you don't start taking action right now, today, that is your reality. That is your reality. Because in America, we have been Taught to see pain as bad, we've been taught to medicate it. All you have to do is turn the TV on. Any problem you have, they're going to say that there is a pill for it. We've been taught to avoid it. We've been taught to out eat it. We've been taught to out drink it. We've been taught to pick up Instagram to distract yourself, to go on TikTok shop. But pain is actually one of your best tools. It's your compass. It points you toward what matters. Pain is trying to tell you what's wrong. If you've ever had a pain in your knee. What do we do? Go get the aspirin, Go get the Tylenol. Not, oh, why did this happen? Am I working out wrong? Should I be working out more? Should I be working out less? Should I be doing something different? Pain always has a message for you. Except we've been taught in America and around the world now to numb it. And I was just listening to an Emma Greed podcast where she was on Mel Robbins podcast and she said that one of the biggest things that has been so distracting to us in life in general is that we have been taught to seek joy. She talks about the rule of thirds. And I have been so guilty in my life of like, I just need to feel happy all the time in the rule of thirds says that in life, no matter what, you're going to feel happy for one third of it, you're going to feel me for one third of it, and you're going to feel pain or awful or not good or depressed for one third of it. And if you're going to feel pain no matter what, why not choose the pain that actually leads to something extraordinary? Why not build the things that you want? Why not fail until you get it right? And here's the problem. We're in the consumption trap, right? We're in a consumption trap. And here's the truth. You truly have consumed enough. You've consumed enough inspiration. Podcasts, books, quotes, masterclasses. You don't need more. You need more execution. Consumption without creation equals constipation. You guys, it's like a spiritual constipation. It's a life constipation. You are getting all of this information and you are stuck. Maybe you don't have a plan. Inspiration without execution actually equals self persecution. It's chosen persecution to continue to consume without action. So you have to start taking action. And I would be doing you a massive disservice if I told you that you didn't have to take painful, scary action every damn day of your life. You have to change your relationship with fear and pain. Because if you don't, you're never going to go anywhere that you want. Fear and pain is a good thing. It has lessons for you. So I want you to think about this. I want you to think about all of the athletes in the world. And let's just use football as an analogy right now. Even if you're not into football, I know that, you know, maybe you've watched a game, you've seen it. All the commercials are coming up because football season is here. So I want you to think about football players. Why do they go to training camp? Why do they go to training camp? It's not just to run plays. It's to recreate every painful scenario that they're about to be faced with on the field. And when a rookie goes on to training camp, you can tell they're a rookie because they're not quite prepared for it. They get a little rocked, right? Their expectation is maybe not quite there for what they're about to step into, into the biggest opportunity of their life. Because the bigger the opportunity, this isn't just for sports. The bigger the opportunity, the more pain you are going to have to learn how to endure. Whether that's solving bigger problems or whether that's dealing with more people or whether that's just having the sheer amount of decisions that are coming at you in a day. So in training camp, they literally line up and hit each other again and again, full force, because they practice getting knocked down, they practice how to take a hit, they practice fumbling the ball, they practice failing. They practice getting sacked and pushed back 10 yards. You guys, they do this so that when it's game time, the opportunity of their lives, they're not shocked by the pain. They're not surprised by the pushback. They are ready for it. They actually start getting excited about it because they know how to handle it. In fact, if they're good, they've learned how to handle it so much more that they're excited because maybe they feel and they believe that their opponent has a different relationship with pain. And if they have a better one, they're going to be the people who are ready for it. And here's the key. All opportunities come with these tackles, you guys. Every opportunity comes with pain and the pushback, and it's not the punishment, it's actually the pathway. So your training camp is life. And life is already handing you the challenges. But the problem is you're treating them like they're negative instead of seeing them as your actual reps to get stronger. Because the bigger the challenges you solve, the more money you make. The faster you solve those challenges, the faster you'll make money. So chasing happiness and avoiding pain is what is actually making us miserable. And the people who succeed aren't running from the pain. They're actually using it. It's the reps that are making them stronger. They've redefined pain as a training ground and not punishment. So my question to you is, are you going to wait until pain catches you off guard, or are you going to have the audacity to pull it forward and let it drive you? Right now, I really pray that you start to make a different relationship with pain and fear and understand that it's just a feeling. It's just your nervous system freaking out because you're not used to it. You're used to running the other direction. And what we want to do is we want to start going head first. We literally want to tackle it and know that these tackles are here for for us because life's biggest opportunities are going to come with them. And are you going to be ready for them, or are you going to be taken off guard by them? You guys, I'm so grateful for you. We just did our Audacity Challenge call today, and it was absolutely amazing. We did our second one. I have two things that I want to share with you. You can still join the Audacity Challenge if you have not. It's totally free. It is four calls. We've done two so far. We have two left, and it's a bunch of audacious, freaking incredible women who are actually doing big things in their life right now in these call. And big things is defined by you. You know, don't bench yourself before the game even begins just by what I'm saying. If you're ready to start taking action, all you have to do is DM me the word audacity or drop the word audacity on any of my Instagram posts at Lori harder. So go and check it out. And until next time, everyone, earn your happy. Welcome back to the podcast. It's time for another quickie, because there's always time to fit in inspiration. Today I want to chat with you about how your family, your partner, and maybe even some of your best friends are unintentionally or maybe even a little bit intentional sabotaging you. And it's usually the people that we care about the most when we set out to go for our big dreams that are going to be the people who actually end up making a dent and having us do it or not do it. And we can't ever blame anybody else at all. That is not what this podcast is about. I want you to be aware of where your best friends, your partner, your family are human and where you can sort of be prepared and safeguard yourself and work through these conversations. So, number one, we can keep them in our lives. We can grow together. But so we can be aware that this is a very, very normal thing that's going to happen, because it is. I know so many women who always try to come into our masterminds or groups, and I swear to you, one of the main conversations is that their husband kind of minimizes or makes fun of what they're doing or doesn't think they can do it. And I never see them again. They just kind of disappear out into the ether because somebody said something to them that didn't feel good or struck fear in them, and they let it get to them and completely take over. And look, I totally get it because my husband actually did this to me in the beginning, and we talk about it all the time now because he used to say, oh, when is this little expensive hobby of yours gonna finally make money? And he even said, if this doesn't start, you know, making the type of money that we need, like you need to piss or get off the pot and let this little hobby go. And so, you know, in the beginning, that can feel really, really threatening. It can feel really scary, it can feel demeaning. It can make you feel shameful, it can make you feel selfish. It can make you be like, oh, my gosh, of course I need to be realistic. What am I thinking? Who am I to think that, oh, my God, the audacity to think that I even could have done this, Right? So it's definitely going to come, and I just want you to be prepared for it. And what we don't want is for you to get all frustrated and but hurt by the people that you love the most. Because what I want you to know is they still love you, but they may not support you or be able to understand where your dreams are coming from or even know if you are capable of doing them. That's what you have to know. So let's talk about how the people that you love the most might be sabotaging your big dreams. Because, let's be honest, the people who love us the most are often the ones who unintentionally hold us back the most. And it's not because they don't love us. It's because our dreams feel unsafe to them. So let's talk about the sneaky little ways that our partners, parents, and even our best friends might be sabotaging us without knowing it. Okay, taking a moment for a rich girl tip for you. If you're somewhere between 500k and a million and trying to scale beyond that and feeling weirdly stuck right now, I'm going to tell you something that no one in your circle is going to ever tell you. You're not stuck. You're just surrounded by people who can't take you where you want to go. So we need be honest. You've outgrown your current circle. You've outgrown the rooms that you're in. And probably a whole lot of the advice that you have been getting is only going to have you regress or keep you stuck exactly where you are. So rich girl rule number one, Proximity is a power move, you guys. You can't scale from asking people who haven't built what you want. And number two, if you're the one mentoring everyone, you're in the wrong room. So trust me, Chris and I have learned this the very expensive way. I have to tell you, this is going to hurt. We once paid 75k each for a mastermind where we were the most successful people in the room. Cute for our ego, terrible for our business and our pocketbooks. That was one of the most expensive, expensive lessons we've ever had to learn. No one was stretching us. No one had the answers that we really needed to scale. No one was playing much bigger than us. And we will never do that again. You guys. Everything changed when we finally got into the spaces where people talked investments, systems, scale and hiring like CEOs, not just hustling more rooms where conversations literally collapse. Timelines, you guys. And that's why we created the elite entrepreneur mastermind. It is two, three and a half day luxury in person retreats with incredible experiences and it's monthly challenge solving calls. It's direct access to Chris and myself. It's a curated high level network where money moves faster because everyone is thinking so much bigger. Thinking big and making millions of doll is the baseline in this room. So if you're ready for that type of room that finally matches your ambition. If you're done being the biggest thinker and pouring into everyone in your space and not getting poured into, just go to Instagram and DM me the word apply. Or you can Go to show notes and you can click on the link below that says Elite Entrepreneur Mastermind. I will send you all of the details and from there we can book a call if you have more questions. You guys, don't forget about rule number three is to not wait for your circle to elevate you get in the room. That literally upgrades your entire identity. And we also have the mentor collective Mastermind if you have not hit over 500k yet, so go and check that out. And I am so excited to spend time with you in these incredible in person rooms next year. So the first one is Fear Projection. This is such a human thing to do. They project their fear onto you and you're going to hear things like, oh, that's risky. Are you sure you want to do that? What if it doesn't work out? And it sounds protective, but it's really their anxiety being handed to you and you're carrying it after that. So one of the reframes that you can just really sit in is realizing that that is actually their fear. They don't have the plan that you have. They don't see the vision that you can see. The fear is on them. And what you can do is you can thank them for caring and then you can keep going. Like, I, I thank you, I see you, I appreciate you caring, but I'm going to keep. Number two is withholding support. So they don't actively discourage you, but they also don't cheer you on. And a lot of times when people are waiting for people to cheer them on, this is almost a personal form of sabotage where it's like, well, if they don't support me, if they don't cheer me on, then I'm upset with them and I don't have the support from my family and this is why I can't do it right. Maybe they change the subject when you talk about your goals or act like it's not a big deal and that silence is going to make you question yourself. The reframe can be not everyone is meant to be your hype squad. Not everyone is going to understand. What you have to do is you have to find the people who light up when you talk about your big dreams and have the answers to help you with your big dreams and normalize any of these fears and any of these risks and also normalize the path and how challenging that path is going to be. This is why I pay to be in masterminds. This is why I pay a shitload for coaches. This is why you see me going to things all the time and putting myself around huge, huge thinkers is they normalize the process where you guys. I went to coffee with some people the other day who were not entrepreneurs, and I was like, holy. Like, I can't even talk about what my life looks like every day. Because they couldn't even fathom, like, the things that I do on a daily basis. I am not making them bad. They just live in a very different world where if I said the risks that I carry, the decisions that I make and the things that I do and how fast I move and ask for really big things or go for big things on a daily basis, it was not even comprehendable to them. And I didn't love the feedback that I was getting. So I had this realization. Just like all of you right now or you've had in the past. I'm like, ooh, I really have to be careful what circles I'm speaking this massive dream into, because if people don't get it, the feeling that they deflect back onto you is pretty intense. Like, energy is a real thing. And I'm like, oh, you know what? We're just gonna. We're gonna talk about. We're gonna find some common ground. We're gon about something totally different. So number three is guilt tripping. They make you feel guilty for putting time, energy, or money into your dream by saying you're never around anymore. Or it must be nice to just focus on yourself and, you know, oh, I hope that you're loving that little business and all the time that you're putting into it, because we sure haven't gotten to see you. Or I sure hope that pays off because I really noticed that it's putting a strain on your relationships. Or I feel like it's putting a strain on our relationship. And I think the reframe with this is really important to know where boundaries matter, because your dreams are going to require investment, and most of the time, those dreams are going to benefit the person who's probably saying it. So I think bringing them in, inviting them along, telling them why it's important that you're doing it, and the fact that you do want to grow something and grow something for the family, or you have big visions for your life, or maybe you just have not felt good or happy without doing these things. Things for yourself, and it's starting to reflect in how you show up in the family. Like, really bring them along and tell them why this is so important to you. Most times, stuff like this is just a communication problem. And if they don't have the vision. And if they don't necessarily have the capacity to understand, you need to explain it to them in a way that is so loving and brings them along. Because if you know that you're the person who maybe has a little bit more emotional capacity in this particular experience, then you're the one who has to kind of buck up and turn the other cheek and carry that. I know that doesn't seem fair, but if you're talking to someone who doesn't have the capacity to understand what you're doing, don't argue with someone who's not going to listen and give you a chance to really talk. So it is your responsibility to kind of take them along. Or if you have to, you might have to cut this person out for a little while. If it is someone that you can kind of of hold to arm's length for a little bit. Number four, they're probably going to highlight worst case scenarios. I've had this so many times. So they're going to play devil's advocate over and over again. They're going to say, let me tell you why I don't think this is going to work. Or let me tell you about your cousin who did this, or your sister, or remember what happened to this person. Oh, I heard a story about this and they lost all this money. Or maybe this person's going to jail, you guys. I don't know. They say the craziest thing sometimes, and I'm like, where did this, this even come from? But you have to decide yourself what worst case scenario is. Are people going to say stuff about you? Could you lose everything? Could you be okay with that if that does happen? These are the questions that you have to ask yourself when you go into entrepreneurship. How far are you willing to go? And what is that line that maybe you put on yourself of here's how far I'm gonna go, here's the line I'm not going to cross, here's the nest egg I'm always going to keep, no matter what. Because it's very different if you have a family, I total that. And those are the decisions that you have to make. So the reframe on this, though, is, what if it works? What if someone has to hold the vision for best case scenario, you guys, and that someone always has to be you. You always have to know, okay, what's the worst that could happen? Can I handle that? And then what is best case scenario? And once you've already covered what's worst case scenario, you can toss that out the window because you know you're set right and now the only vision I want you guys to hold or the only vision that's going to hold you and get you to the finish line is best case scenario. And as a visionary, as an entrepreneur, you have to always be holding that. With the holidays and the new year coming, you probably are looking around your house thinking that you would love to upgrade and freshen up your environment and there is no easier way to do that than with your window treatments. Nobody covers windows better than blinds.com blinds.com brings your space to life in your way. They have free design help. Other retailers may claim to have experts, but blinds.com has spent nearly 30 years building an award winning team of over 100 design consultants that are ready to help you create your dream space. Always convenient, always tailored to you. Three ways to shop 1. 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In 2026, stop waiting and start selling with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at at shopify.com happy go to shopify.com happy that shopify.com happy hear your first cha ching this new year with Shopify by your side. Number five. They're gonna sabotage you through subtle little undermining jokes or sarcasm. They're gonna say things like, oh, here comes the entrepreneur of the year. And it feels playful, but it's actually really shitty when it lands on your heart. And we have to remember that the reframe is that jokes are often truth in disguise. And it's probably kind of pinging them in a way that they realize they did not go after what they wanted to do. So don't take them as truth, you guys. Take them as fuel. Like, go and just take so much action that one day you can say, remember that little business? Yeah, well, that little business is going to take you on the trip of a lifetime. Or that little business, mom is gonna buy you a house or whatever you want, whatever feels good, whatever sort of thing mind actually fuels you. Or maybe you're feeling opposite and you're like, remember that little business? Yeah, I'm out of here. Whatever it is, you guys, whatever fuels you in a loving, beautiful way to keep going for your big dream. That's what we want to hold on to. Number six, the last way, which there's plenty of more ways, but this is my last and final one, is that they're going to overemphasize stability. They're going to push you toward this safer, more traditional path because it's what they know. No, they're always going to say something like, you really need to get a stable job, or don't you just want something where you know your retirement is good and the reframe on that is stability for them doesn't equal fulfillment for you. And you're not here to repeat their path and their cycle. You're here to create your own path and your own life. And also, stability does not exist. Let me tell you a little story about stability. And that is, is my husband was in the most incredible job in the financial industry and the entire mortgage and finance industry in 2008 completely collapsed to the point where there were no jobs. So we went from making a ton of money and overspending when we were in our twenties to completely in debt with him, no place to go, no jobs in actual existence of what he was doing in that time period. From a job where everyone said, oh, it's banking, I mean, it's homes, it's. I mean, it's the most stable thing out there to completely losing it. So nothing, nothing is stable. And I will say I will always bet on myself. And if for any reason anyone ever needs to go and find a job, let me just tell you, there are jobs available, especially for people who are willing to hustle. Like, I love the creator economy. I love the fact that you could pick up a Uber or doordash or Instacart or anything like that for extra cash. At the flip of turning something on on your phone, it's actually quite mind blowing. So the way that I look at the world is just the endless opportunities are out there. So I am going to bet on myself first. If nothing is stable, I have the most control over me. So I hope that this helps because I have been through each and every one of these with pretty much every single person that I love in my life. And it can either bring you closer because you're going to have a hard conversation and you're going to say why this stuff matters and why you know you'd appreciate if you could just go and do your thing and not have them say the comments anymore. Or you can also just deal with it and know that this is such a human thing and let it be okay that you don't share the same views and that it's okay that they're more risk averse than you. Like be the bigger person in this scenario and know that you got blessed with maybe a little more vision and a little bit more capacity and you can also show them what's possible for them. I know this is hard. I know it's not fun when it happens. I know it feels like a single person in your life who means a lot to you can completely take you down and demolish your dreams. But this is the path. The second you say you want to do something, people you love are going to come in and it's going to cut you at the knees. Like it's going to take you down. And then that's literally the first step of if you should be an entrepreneur or not. Like if you can't handle that, you should not be in entrepreneurship. And it's okay if you felt it. But now I want you to move through it and I want you to do these reframes and I want you to understand that you got the initiation. So congratulations. And I still get like things like this in my family. Like there's still people who totally don't understand or make fun of what I do or oh, you just have to film yourself for your career or what, whatever it is. And people who get totally cringed out by the fact that I'm filming parts of my life and they literally can't believe it and it's so off putting and they think it's horrible. And I've had different people unfollow me who are close to me, family members and people in my life. So you guys, it's just the initiation and it just says that you're on the path to Breaking a pattern, if it ruffles feathers in your family, it's because you're doing something different that is going to get a different result. Because if you did everything they left liked, you'd have the same results. So, you guys, I'm sending you so much love, and I swear to you, I have never felt better in my entire life. And of course, I work out and I take different supplements and I try to eat right, but glossy is one of the main things that makes me wake up in the morning and feel amazing. With a flat stomach, less bloated. I just know that taking that probiotic, that magnesium, drinking all of the water with it, vitamin C, especially the hyaluronic acid for my skin. You guys, I'm 44 years old and I. I am putting so much energy into my skin at this point because, you know, we're getting older and things happen to your skin and collagen decreases and hyaluronic acid in your body that you create decreases. So I am ramping all of that up more than I ever have, and you guys should go and check it out because it makes a massive difference. So thank you guys so much for tuning in. And I know that you are in a place where you are going to do big things because you listen to this podcast. And it's never been more exciting for me to hear all of the people who have taken big leaps, big risks, because they've been listening and they have borrowed the stories and borrowed the belief of this podcast. So I'm grateful for you guys. And until next time, earn your happy. Bye, everyone. Hey, everyone. Welcome back to the podcast. It's time for another quickie because there's always time to. To fit an inspiration. And today I just wrapped up my fourth Audacity Challenge call for the month that I had. And I am excited to tell you that we are continuing those calls. We're actually going to do a once a month Audacity call with this incredible group of women. We had thousands of people sign up. We've had hundreds of women connect. We've had hundreds of women move forward on their big, audacious goals. And we're doing big things in this group. And when I say big things, I mean massive things. You can't quite understand it until you come in. And it doesn't matter if you're intimidated. It doesn't matter if you're like, I don't even know if I feel like I'm capable of doing, you know, making these big bold moves like, do not be intimidated. You are Stopping yourself get in this group, it's going to change your life. Like, we are the biggest group of most welcoming, amazing, incredible women. Just saying. I'm just saying, saying, like, truly, you're gonna find your friends in there, and if you are holding back, you are just sabotaging yourself. So you need to get in this group. It's gonna change your life. I put it in the show notes so that you can join up below. And once a month, we're gonna be moving forward. And I literally can't wait. So today I want to talk about the fact that ready is not a feeling, it's a decision. And faith is built literally in the depths of darkness. Faith is not built on the mountaintops. So here's the truth. I've never actually ever in my entire life, of all the things that I have done, felt ready. Every single leap, Whether it was writing my book or whether it was raising money for light pink, which pivoted into glossy, or even starting my first business was made while I was terrified, while I had anxiety, while I was doubting myself and mentally listing all the reasons why I was not qualified. So in my head, it was, you're not smart enough. You did not graduate. You don't have supportive friendships, your family doesn't support you. In fact, it's something that is frowned upon to really reach for money or success, especially in the religion that I was raised in. And I want to be real that after investing a million dollars into launching my original idea, which was light pink, during the pandemic, almost two years of blood, sweat, and tears and fear, and literally doing everything that I took to try to get that off the ground, and then having to pivot, I felt like a complete failure. So imagine years of work, all the money, all those dreams, all of that disappointment, all of the disappointed investors, and having to walk away. I want you to picture carrying that and telling people and letting them know that you weren't able to get it to the finish line and you needed to pivot. You guys. I had more sleepless nights than I can possibly count. I think I've blocked them out. I had nights where my chest was so incredibly heavy with dread, where I was staring at the ceiling in the dark, literally praying over and over and over to God, like, please, God, help me. Please, God, take this from me. Please, God, I feel so alone. Please, God, show me the next step. Please tell me what I should do. I felt so disconnected from God. I even felt abandoned by God. But what I couldn't see at the time was that all of that darkness, all of those feelings, all of that distance, and all of the failure didn't mean that I was off track. It literally was the initiation for something so much bigger. Because faith is not built on the mountaintop moments when everything feels good and you feel so aligned and you've got all the energy and everybody's excited and everyone's cheering for you and leaving. Nice comments. Faith is forged in the silence. Faith happens when God feels really far away. When you've convinced yourself that you can't go on or that you're a complete failure or a loser. You don't know why you can't get yourself out of this. This slump. You don't know why you can't get yourself motivated. You don't know why you can't stop binge eating. You don't know why you can't stop drinking wine every night. You don't know why you can't get off your phone. You don't know why you can't stop scrolling. You guys. When nothing looks like it's working, that's where surrender is born. That's where you lay down your plans, your pride, your timing, and you hand it all over to God and you start praying and say, I need help. Help. I got to figure this out. But, God, I promise that I will act on what you show me. I promise that I will take massive action. I will go to the meetings. I will get the mentors. I will join the programs. I will listen to the podcast. I will read the books. I will show up boldly. I will do the embarrassing thing. I will trust that no matter what those comments are or what my family says, that I am on the right path because you put this in my heart. Heart. You have to surrender it and hand it all over. And in those moments when you feel like you've lost everything is when you discover you've actually never been more connected in your life. And that obedience to the call, even when you can't hear a single word back, is the highest act of trust. And that is where faith is born. So without walking through the dark, I don't actually believe that you know what faith even is. Yet. Too many people finish their workday feeling frustrated, drained, and unfulfilled. I know that I have experienced that my myself. And the good news is, it doesn't have to be this way. And you don't need a new job to fix it. Patrick Lencioni, author of the Five Dysfunctions of a Team and more than a dozen other bestsellers, created the working genius Assessment to help you pinpoint the kind of work that gives you energy, the kind that lights you up, and it also shares the kind that drains it. So over a million people, including me, have taken it and completely changed. Changed how I lead and show up every day. If you're a CEO, an entrepreneur, or someone who just wants to level up in business and in life, working genius is going to give you the clarity and confidence to operate in your strengths and find greater joy in what you do. Because confidence isn't pretending to be good at everything. It's knowing where you're truly gifted. Take the working genius assessment today and get 20% off with code earn@workinggenius.com that's working genius dot com. You'll be glad you did it. That's why some people get lost forever in that place, is because you think it's supposed to feel a certain way and it actually feels like you've been abandoned or you feel like you cannot do it on your own anymore. And that is when you have to start believing that something bigger than you could give you power, could give you strength. Strength. Because until that moment, you don't actually have to rely on God. And it's the people who keep on going that are going to be given the reward of a lifetime. Sometimes it's money. Sometimes it's a soulmate. Sometimes it's simply a miracle of someone you never saw coming. But you will always, always get something rigged in your favor. And everything will finally make sense to you after you have walked through this dark period and truly learned what faith is, is. So here's what I've learned. There's no other way to learn than on the job. And I fully trust that. If God gave me the vision, then whatever shows up on the path, even the ugliest, the darkest of nights, it means that it was for my evolution. And that trust has never failed me. Not once. Not even when I convinced myself that my entire life was falling apart and I was a failure. So if you guys want to play a big game, and I know that you do, if you're listening to this podcast, you can't keep blowing the small things out of proportion. You have to lock in on growth. You've got to learn to carry the fear. You've got to learn to deal with the failure, the rejection, and move anyway. You actually have to go for no. You have to look forward to the rejection and know that it's growing you and that it's going to be on your path. More than winning is because you can't win until you've been rejected multiple times and it's just a numbers game. And the most successful people know know this. And the people who will never even remotely touch the tip of the iceberg are going to be off put by the fact that they have to deal with failure and rejection. They're going to stay down for the count, they're not going to push through, and they're not going to believe that that rejection was for them. When God is literally putting that on your path for you, you have to have the audacity to believe that you could win. Especially. Especially when you're failing. Not on a good day, not when you wake up with a ton of energy, not when you feel awesome, not when you've got great plans for the things feel like you're failing. You have to have the audacity to believe you could win. And that means that you have to put yourself out there over and over and over and over and take action. Life is a participatory sport. You have to participate or life will not even meet you halfway. This is where the real ones are made. If you aren't willing to walk through this part, you aren't ready to carry the weight of your dream straight up, you guys buckle up or step aside because that's what you're signing up for. So ready isn't about how you feel. It's literally a choice you make again and again in the moments that you do not feel like it. So let me ask you right now, what decision are you putting off because you're waiting to feel ready? What are you pretending not to know about where you're sabotaging yourself? You literally have to do this for you. And if you're ready for some massive accountability and the partners and the coaches to get you there, I truly, truly want to be the person who helps pull you through some of the challenges that are coming with putting your business out there or taking it to the next level. I am so insanely excited to let you know that we are relaunching the mentor collective mastermind. And it's been one of the coolest things I've ever gotten to see and be a part of. It has changed me, me at a level I can't even tell you because of the way that everybody in there is taking massive action using the eight coaches that we have in there that we pay for so that you get them for free. We have a social media coach. We have a marketing coach. We have an attorney in there. We have an AI coach. We literally have Coaches for every single part of your business. If you have podcast questions, funnel questions, email questions, opt in questions, questions, legal questions, anything that you could possibly imagine and is in this group and it's timely, we answer your questions within 24 to 48 hours. We call it on demand coaching. Not to mention the live calls with Chris and I every other week along with our coaches who are in there along with teach backs. You guys, teach backs are where these students, you who come in there, if you have a zone of genius, you actually get to apply to do a teach back to the entire group. So imagine if you had something to teach for 15 to 20 minutes, you get to go in there and be in front as a leader in front of the group for teach backs, which is absolutely incredible that you get the option and opportunity to use this platform and have a stage within this group where you also get highlighted and get to teach this program. Truly, how it started is because we said what would it look like to have the most supportive mastermind on the Internet Internet. And Chris and I sat down and listed every single thing that we could possibly imagine that has changed our life on our trajectory of when we have mentored and used coaches and been in masterminds like this, which has been our whole career. If that says something to you, I will say I know that all of our success has come from mentors and masterminds and getting coaching and not struggling and wasting a ton of money by trying to figure it out on our own own. We literally got directly into the groups of people who had done it before and followed their path and that's all there is to it. Success leaves clues. Follow the path. So you guys, I hope that we get to work with you if you want to be one of the 30 people because we can only take small groups. As you've heard, we have the coaches that we have to make sure can get to all of your questions within 24 to 48 hours along with a accountability coach just for you that you get assigned to make sure that you're moving forward every single week with the tasks that you said that you were going to do. So you can go to loriharter.com waitlist and I hope, I hope, hope, hope I get to work with you. You get to choose between six or 12 months and it is going to be one of the greatest adventures of your entire career. And get ready. Buckle up. If you are not someone who wants to move the needle big, please do not join this because we are a group of action takers who happen we are breaking out of slumps. We are moving forward. We are moving out of stuck. We are no longer just sitting and wondering why something isn't working. We figure it the out and that's what this group is. It is massive accountability. So go to loriharter.com forward/waitlist and I hope that I get to work with you for the next however long you choose. And until next time, earn your happy. Bye everyone. Sam.