Navigating The Highs And Lows Of Building Your Personal Brand Online With Amanda Bucci, Business Coach And Author Of “Followed”

You can't protect yourself from how people respond to you. You can't protect yourself from what people say. But you can find a way to, number one, create the most peaceful environment that you possibly can in social media. And then also really thinking about what kind of boundaries do I need to put in place so I can feel protected and supported in my own personal process while I'm continuing to courageously share my story, my dreams, my mission, and myself every single day. Foreign.

Welcome back to the show. I'm so happy you're here. And I want to remind you that I am giving you a free course. I used to charge almost a thousand dollars for this course, and we have sold hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of these courses. You guys, you absolutely want to grab it. You just have to go to becomealigned.com to get it. Truly, these are all the things that Chris and I had learned throughout the years that we put together from of our favorite masterminds, from all of our favorite courses. And we just kind of took these different pieces of things that rocked our world and changed our lives and put it into this course. So all you have to do is go to becomealigned.com and go grab that simply because we want to gift you in our community and have you in our atmosphere more often. I just want to be talking to you all the time. Outside of this podcast, I'm a talker. I love doing it. On today's podcast, I have the incredible Amanda Bucci. And if you are anyone who owns a social media account, which I. I don't really know if there's anyone who doesn't anymore, and if not, you might wanna look into it. And I know we all need our boundaries, but you kind of just need a social media account nowadays. But with that comes a lot of different things. And you know it, you've experienced it, you've felt it. From excitement to anxiety, to stress, to wanting to grow, to growing too fast, to this being scary, to being judged. And you guys, today on the podcast, Amanda talks all about being seen, facing judgment and building an authentic personal brand. And we dive really deep into what that looks like to really have people criticize you. Amanda has been in the eye of the public and has not had the easiest go with being the most authentic version of herself. So that's what I love about her. She's just real and raw, and she's gonna tell you exactly what's going on in her life. And whether people like it or not, she keeps on showing up.

So.

So I think she really models what that looks like to keep showing up despite what people are saying. And this book truly not only helps us be seen more, but helps us in this time, this era, this day and age of being so public. And what does it even mean to be authentic online?

Right.

So, you guys, this is a great conversation. Let's dive in. Amanda, I'm so excited to have you on the show. Thank you so much for coming on.

I'm so excited to be here. It's so nice to see you.

I know. So, you guys, Amanda and I feel like we go way, way back. We met a mastermind. We met in Lewis Howe's Mastermind when we were in very different places in our lives. But it was so beautiful to be able to be in a room that was curated by someone else and to just meet so many people from all different sorts of businesses and backgrounds. But I remember just connecting with you right away. And I know that this book is going to be huge because of who you are and how you are and how you show up. Meaning I know it's going to have some major impact because something about you, Amanda, is that you're just willing to go there and you're willing to share and you're willing to talk about what it really felt like. And I know that after following your journey and knowing you for so many years, those people who are willing to go to those kind of, like, dark places or those places in themselves where they're like, I want to evolve this way, or I'm, you know, trying something new on and being so open about it, those are the people who really blaze the trail for all of us and go, well, if she can do it, maybe I can be open like that, too and still survive it. Survive it. Not just survive it, thrive in it.

Right.

So I'm so grateful for you just sharing everything. I'm sure you've heard that from so many people. Just being able to follow along with that journey of how do you move through these different evolutions in our life online? And that's why I'm so excited about this book is there's not necessarily this, like, line anymore between a personal brand, a company, and just. Just being yourself. Like, we were having conversations this last weekend about how even if you say you don't have a brand, you still have a brand by just how you. So your book really goes into talking about so much of this. So, Amanda, thank you for coming on and why this book right now. I know our souls kind of like, tell us what to do and write. So tell me that journey.

Oh yeah, the soul definitely was like, hello, here's your idea and you're going to run with it. And my personhood was like, this is interesting. I don't fully. Okay, like, all right, this seems, this seems interesting. And you know, that's what happens with ideas. I love. I'm such a big fan of Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert and just talks about creativity and how ideas have their own like, consciousness to them and you essentially become the steward of the idea and if you don't go with it, it will pick someone else, but it ultimately is just something that needs to be in the world. So I felt really curious and interested of like, what could this idea possibly be? And everybody that I talked to about it, just their faces lit up when I had the conversation about the experience of being a content creator. Not just the tactical, practical execution of how to build a brand and pick your niche and pick your pillars and pick your branding and your colors and your main message and like all of the stuff that goes into building a company, a business, personal brand on like a tactical level, but the actual experience of what it feels like to be a human being and to decide I am a person and what things about me as a person am I going to decide to put online and amplify and what are the things about me that I am going to have a connection with, with this audience of people that I'm either first getting to know and figuring out, like who are the people that are going to be interested in what I have to say or this ever evolving relationship with people that maybe you've had for years and years and years and you're kind of always ebbing and flowing with either like a core group of people that have been following you for a long time or people that are just getting to know you today and just finding your account today. And that experience of being a person who is going through that is really interesting to so many people because it's actually just getting started. I really feel with the content creator industry and with AI now being able to support in so much of the manual content creation stuff, that just minimizes the barrier for even more people to come online and to feel more free to choose to carve out their own little corner of the Internet, express themselves, create a company, create a solution, create a brand and just put yourself in the game and put yourself out there. And so many more people are going to be doing that now more than ever. Social media has only existed for two decades, just 20 years out of our. Isn't that insane?

Yeah.

And there hasn't been any conversation about the actual lived experience, the emotional journey, the identity based journey, the just experience of having watchful eyes on you as you go through different evolutions of your own self and your own journey while you're like courageously and vulnerably putting yourself out there. Whether you start a new business venture or you are starting a podcast and you're using your voice for the first time and you're putting out ideas or your personal story and your experiences that people have opinions about, and you have to process all of this stuff while still consistently standing in your truth in order to make your brand successful. You have to be super courageous every single day.

Oh my goodness, you're taking me literally, walking me through my own journey of from how far that we've come. When you first go out on social media and you first start deciding to, even now, when you do have a lot of boundaries and you have a lot of understanding of how you want to show up, there's still so much because it is changing so much. And we never know what the next thing is or the next thought or the next, you know, things that are going to be shared or what are people thinking. Because it really is such group consciousness that can happen on there as well, which is interesting. Sometimes it's like, do I feel this way or is this just from everything that I've been thinking and reading and how is this being construed and shown to us in our lives? But I want to ask you a question. Even thinking back to your most painful moments on social media, to maybe sharing something that got maybe a lot of hate or a lot of people like being rude or awful to you, was it still worth it for those lessons?

Oh, yeah, a hundred percent. And there's so many of those lessons that are in the book now, and it's almost come full circle. The lessons that I write about in the book and just the things that you learn on your social media journey and just in your personal development journey in general is when you kind of look back in hindsight and you put together the pieces. And again, even just creating content, if you write content about your personal journey or your story, the moment you start putting something that you experienced into a piece of content or into a piece of writing or into a podcast or into a video, you process it more deeply and you start to unpack. What were the lessons that I actually learned? What were some of those things that I can take and share with people based on my experience and as the person that I feel Like, I'm, you know, excited to be, get to write this book and get to share this message. So many of my social media experiences are now things that I get to talk about and teach about and serve other people in those difficult times and those moments. And there's so many lessons, everything from regulating my emotional experience and nervous system to figuring out what are my expectations of the people that are online. What kind of relationship is this even like, Is this something that, can I trust these people? Can I not trust these people? And you really go through it when you start to kind of unpack. Like, number one, I am putting myself in a situation where I am showing up and owning who I am, and I am ultimately not necessarily trusting strangers. Because you don't have intimacy with people in that way where you, you know, pour your vulnerability out to someone and you trust them not to weaponize it or take advantage of it or misunderstand you. You are creating, like, deep internal empowerment simply by putting yourself out there and knowing and expecting that plenty of people will not understand it. Some people will not like it. Some people will be active haters of whatever you're actually doing and actively not like it and tell you about it. And you get the opportunity. Of course, it can be painful. It can be emotionally dysregulating. You might need to go to therapy about it like I did. And, you know, you might go through all these experiences, but if you choose to keep staying in the game, what you've done is you've created such a stronger sense of resilience within yourself, and you have chosen to say, cool, I learned some lessons. Maybe I can take some feedback from people and I can process the emotional experience that I just had. But am I going to show back up to the thing that I'm supposed to be doing? Am I going to show back up to my dreams, to my mission, to my voice, to my own power? And when you do actually do that, it's. It's incredibly empowering. And you get to have so much more strength in yourself just as a person.

2026 is the year that you launch your business. It's the year that you've become the boss. You become the leader. That idea that you have that has been eating at you forever that just will not leave you alone is going to come to life. Maybe it's something that someone tells you you should always sell or a store you've already designed in your head. And with Shopify, 2026 is when you finally make it happen. Shopify gives you everything you need to Sell online and in person. Millions of entrepreneurs have already made the sleep from household name to first time business owners. Just getting started you guys. I use Shopify for glossy and I remember when they sent me my little shopping bag celebrating my 10,000 sales and I literally cried because I was so scared to take the leap. And I'm so glad that I did and that I use Shopify. It gives you all the tools to easily build your dream store. You can choose from hundreds of beautiful templates that you can customize to match. Your brand setup is fast with Shopify's built in AI tools that write product descriptions and headlines and help you edit photos so marketing is built into you can create email and social campaigns that reach customers wherever they scroll. So as you grow, Shopify grows with you. You can handle more orders, expand to new market and do it all from the Same dashboard in 2026. Stop waiting and start selling with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com happy go to shopify.com happy that's shopify.com happy. Hear your first cha ching this new year with Shopify by your side. Too many people finish their workday feeling frustrated, drained and unfulfilled. I know that. I have experienced that myself. And the good news is it doesn have to be this way and you don't need a new job to fix it. Patrick Lencioni, author of the Five Dysfunctions of a Team and more than a dozen other bestsellers, created the Working Genius assessment to help you pinpoint the kind of work that gives you energy, the kind that lights you up, and it also shares the kind that drains it. So over a million people, including me, have taken it and completely changed how I lead and show up every day. If you're a CEO, an entrepreneur, or someone who just wants to level up in business and in life, working genius is going to give you the clarity and confidence to operate in your strengths and find greater joy in what you do. Because confidence isn't pretending to be good at everything. It's knowing where you're truly gifted. Take the working Genius assessment today and get 20% off with code Earn at Working genius. Com that's Working genius. Com. You'll be glad you did it. So what does that look like, Amanda, when you know you've been in those moments? Because I had a moment online, it's like it was kind of like, you know, how you have your worst fear in your head and because you're always thinking it and you're so afraid of it. It's literally the exact thing that you manifest for your soul's evolution. I had that exact thing happen that I was like, it was kind of earlier, it was probably 2017, and you kind of always have it in the back of your head, like, what if someone decides to cancel me? Or what if I say something wrong? Or all of the things we always think whenever. We're also trying to be authentic, because it was a very fine line between trying to share yourself and be authentic and saying how you really feel and having a large group of people get mad at you. And I had something happen where it was just kind of blew up in a day, and I was like, oh, shit, this is awful. Like, there no explaining myself will fix this because it's taken out of context and this is not what was meant by this. And in those moments, they can feel crazy. You can feel like you're just getting taken down or maybe something, you know, that you shared. You can't unshare it. It's out there. So when you're in those spiraling moments where, I mean, if we really talk about that emotion and what it is, it is powerful. You can't see through it, you can't see outside of it. It feels like you're never going to come out of it. Tell me about a moment for you where this has happened and how did you support yourself, but how do you now support yourself emotionally and mentally around those moments?

Yeah, the first moment that that happened to me as well was actually, I think it was the second mastermind meeting. When Lewis's mastermind in June of 2018, I believe it was. And it was my first time ever getting, like, really canceled in a way that was big. The story essentially was that I was pivoting from the fitness space to the business space. And in the fitness industry. Not a lot of people had marketing. Kind of like awareness influencers didn't really do traditional marketing. So when I learned a lot of traditional marketing and I started to do more kind of like markety videos on my YouTube channel, people were like, what is this girl doing? Like, it feels manipulative. It feels this. And I was like, I don't know what I'm. What's. What's going on. Like, how do I kind of blend these two worlds together in a way that feels good and authentic for people? So there was already kind of like a little bit of an edge with my audience where they were like, I don't know if I want this. I don't know what this girl's Doing. And a few months later, I met a friend, and he was doing a webinar with. My first time hearing about webinars, and he was doing this webinar talking about. He was a health coach talking about healing your relationship with food. And we were going to do an affiliate for his webinar. And I thought, cool, this seems like it would be a good kind of blend between the fitness and health space and nutrition and things that I already talk about and also the business space and kind of getting my feet wet into webinars. There were some sentences or some language about some survey that he sent out that for some people, they experienced it as problematic language and, you know, related to healing your relationship with food in terms of it being problematic for the potential that people that were struggling with eating disorders would see that and sign up for a coaching program when in reality, they needed medical treatment. So three days straight of Twitter people just threads and threads and threads going off saying that I was trying to profit off of people that had eating disorders. I should go to the police. I was incredibly unethical. I was doing all these things that was just so unacceptable. And of course, that wasn't how I meant it. And of course, I was, like, probably ignorant to certain pieces of language that I wasn't fully aware was potentially harmful to certain people reading it. And it was just kind of this experience of, like, what's the line between harm and coaching? And just like, all of that kind of big conversation blew up. But some people started attacking my body and my boyfriend at the time and just, like, personal things about me. And it was almost like all these people that already didn't like me got to come out of the woodworks and be like, yeah, I never liked her anyway. She's this, she's that. And it was like, three days straight. And I think in the middle of it, like, I had the mastermind with Lewis and Jenna Kutcher.

Oh, God.

Yeah. She was, like, so helpful. And I was just like, I'm so glad I have these people that, like, can kind of understand and support me through it. And having a support system was really helpful because you feel really alone.

Yeah.

And you feel really helpless because, like you said, it's this experience that you don't get to have the opportunity to speak your experience, because some things that people will say back are like, if you're defending yourself, then that proves that you're guilty. And it's this, like, public trial thing that is really off. Right. Like, it's clearly not actually effective in the way that people think it's effective. But in the chapter in my book I talk about, it is in many ways important to be able to call forward people who, you know, don't have a certain perspective and might be causing harm or who are using certain language that shouldn't be using certain language. And those things are important for like, the expansion of industries and the evolution of like, making the industries more in integrity and more clear about who should be talking about what. And like, which things are not okay to say because obviously on social media anyone can say anything and there is misinformation spread all the time. So it is important for people to be able to have a space to talk about those things. And there is also a power dynamic that is at play with someone that has an audience and someone that doesn't. So when people band together to, even if it's like an attacking of someone that has an audience, it's really this power dynamic of this person that has a big platform and a lot of power and they need to be humbled. But what doesn't happen is there's no real accountability for anyone who is attacking or saying anything, number one, to be fact checked and number two, to be accountable to how they show up in terms of like, language, hateful language, violent language, hurtful language, things that aren't actually true, things that are taken out of context. Like all those things that maybe you would have in a private argument with a partner or a friend and imagine just sitting in a conflict with a partner or friend and you have trust and love and bonded and connection with that person and you hear them say something and you get really upset at it because it triggered something within you. It's like that, but so much amplified because we don't have that deep intimacy with someone where we can be vulnerable. In a conversation of like, this is what I meant and I'm so sorry I hurt you. And you know, we don't have that availability with audience members or non audience members to do that. So it has to be more of this thoughtful, intentional process. And you also have to be able to process like your deep emotions about what's coming up for you, because it does create a quite a lot of dysregulation. No matter how much training you have, like, no matter how much you have done therapy or you've been develop nervous system regulation, it really hits on this primal, deep thing that we all have to belong. That feeling of getting like exiled from the group is so deep and so primal for human beings that that getting canceled is deeply terrifying. Like you said, facing your fear and whether you want to or not, it happened for both of us. The things that I learned are like, okay, I am never going to be perfect. There are going to be things that I don't know. There are going to be things that I am ignorant to. The question then becomes, how do I kind of move about social media knowing that there are going to be things that I'm ignorant to? And how do I, like, own what I know and own what I don't know when I'm showing up? How can I just make sure that I'm really being considerate and thoughtful about what I'm saying? And also, how do I make sure that I just own it when I made a mistake and say, oh, thank you so much for your feedback? I didn't realize this. I'm gonna move forward. Thank you so much. And then also, how can I process my own emotional experience when that's happening? The tricky part, I think, is how do I tell people on my platform, like, how do I talk about this and use my platform to talk about what just happened? Because you have to kind of go through the layers of, like, this was my emotional experience, which it doesn't always feel right to talk about your emotional experience, depending on, like, what it is and who you are and that whole thing. And then also here's, like, the leadership kind of that I'm bringing into it, the lessons that I'm learning, the ways that I'm taking accountability. And also you have to kind of unpack what is mine to take responsibility for and what isn't mine to take responsibility for. And that's a tricky thing in any relationship, never mind one that has so many other layers to it.

I love that your book talks about this, and I'm sure it gives so many different ways to go about how to process it, because, Amanda, both you and I are constantly in rooms of people who have big purposes and big dreams that want to get them out in the world. And nowadays you can avoid social platforms if you want to get your message out. It's like one of the most important modalities, and we're so lucky to have it. And it takes a lot of navigating and understanding yourself mixed into this whole web of your team and everyone in the whole world. And I always find. And I'm sure you find this, too, I'd love to hear, if I really boil it down. When I'm in this room full of people with these big dreams who want to get out there, the main fear is just they're afraid to fail and screw up, like in public and say the wrong thing and experience what we just experienced. So what would you say to somebody who is nodding in their head right now going, okay, that's the truth. I may not share it all the time, but I'm holding back on going bigger or saying how I really feel, even though I know that's the impact I'm supposed to make because I don't know if I can handle the opinions or backlash.

Learn how to free handle the opinions and backlash. Of course, if you can recognize and acknowledge that that's your fear and that's what's holding you back. The way that you work with fear or the way that I like to work with fear is recognize like, okay, this is a fear and this is something that, yes, I can anticipate potential reputational damage. I can anticipate this, I can anticipate that. And then you have to ask yourself, how much longer am I going to let that hold me back? And that's really the only question you can ask yourself because you can look at it and be like, yes, that is certainly holding me back. And I can choose to let it hold me back or to let it kind of keep my voice smaller or my dreams less bright or my voice less loud. And that's okay too. We're all going to go through different cycles and journeys of like, okay, it feels more comfortable to keep my voice smaller here. And like, that is going to be a part of your process of building emotional and nervous system regulation, resilience, and being able to like really hold your voice and your body open when it wants to contract. Like, that process is deep and subconscious. Right? So the way that I like to work with those fears is to be able to acknowledge them, number one. But to be able to ask myself, okay, if that did happen, how would I actually handle it? What tools can I use to support myself in that? How can I even like prepare with support and make sure that I have good people around me and make sure that I have good processing tools and make sure that, you know, I am thoughtful about what I put out and how I put it out. Not to the point of over perfectionism or trying to get it right 100% of the time, but being able to really hold my power and own what I know and also own that I am a human being that is allowed to make mistakes and view myself that way. Because there are going to be plenty of other people that will not view me that way. And if I view myself in the light that I need to be perfect or I need to be put together 100% of the time. The moment someone pins points it out in me that I'm not is the moment that I've given my power away.

There are so many challenges to business that I don't want starting to be one of them for you. And when you want more. When you're starting a business, you need Northwest Registered Agent because you get access to thousands of free guides, tools and legal forms to help you launch and protect your business. And it's all in one place. You can build your complete business identity with Northwest today. Northwest Registered Agent has been helping small business owners and entrepreneurs launch and grow business for nearly 30 years. They're the largest registered agent and LLC service in the US with over 1500 corporate guides. Real people who know your local laws and can help you and your business every step of the way. You can sign up for free account to begin managing your business hub with lawyer, drafted operating agreements, bylaws, resolutions, membership certificates, bills of sale and more at no cost. Northwest makes life easy for business owners. They don't just help you form your business, they give you the free tools you need after you form it, like operating agreements, meeting minutes and thousands of how to guides that explain the complicated ins and outs of running a business. And let me tell you, this is life changing because I had no idea how much went into this. So don't wait. Protect your privacy, build your brand and get your complete business identity in just 10 clicks and 10 minutes. Visit www.northwestregisteredagent.com earn free and start building something amazing. Get more with Northwest registered agent at www.northwestregisteredagent.com forward/earfree.

So for more ownership of your power, own that part of you that will probably make a mistake. Be like, yep, I will probably make a mistake. People will probably see it and I have to get to find a way within me to just get okay with that because it will happen and it will be a part of the process.

I can't remember who said it, but it just stuck with me. It was sooner or later you're going to get caught being yourself, so you might as well out yourself. You might as well put that out there. And truly that helped me understand like whatever I'm afraid of being caught for or you know what I mean? And nothing like maybe for some people it is terrible but like whatever I'm afraid of people going oh would, would they still like me if they knew? It's like I kind of start going how can I dabble in kind of showing that so that I never have to be afraid that, oh, she's not perfect. Oh, she doesn't know that. Oh, she's not the best speaker. Oh, she doesn't know all of her scientific fact around that. Like, the more that I started going, I don't know about this, or bringing different people in or kind of myself or saying I might have a panic attack, like, something, like, the more that I read myself. So those were those moments. So for you, you talk a lot about building an authentic brand and what does that look like and being authentic online? Can you share a time where you kind of took a self assessment and realized that you weren't sharing who you either really were or what you wanted to share, you weren't sharing?

Yeah, absolutely. Even somewhat recently, there's been so many things that, you know, I have awareness of that I recognize will be misunderstood. Probably specifically in my relationship with my husband John. We're in a polyamorous, open relationship, and there's so many things within that that people still have so many fears and deep triggers around. And, like, I really understand it. And also I have awareness of the way that some people on the Internet view our relationship. And that awareness of those, like, eyeballs of those judgmental, critical eyeballs, those still get to me. And no matter how much I've done in sharing about the things that have gone on in my career or my business, adjustments or pivots or even in the midst of figuring out, like my husband John and I, we share so much online and we talk About Q&As, and we share just different things that we've done in our relationship in terms of the things that we have figured out. But there's still so many things that I'm like, I would love to be able to share this and I still need to do some work on my own fears. And as much as I know, again, I'm like, outing myself. As much as I have the process for what it looks like, it doesn't mean that I have done it with every single thing that I have in my own experience. And it's something that I'm dedicated to, I'm devoted to, but also, like, take your time. You don't have to put everything out there all at once. You also don't have to put everything out there in general. There are so many things that you are allowed to keep private. And I think that that's something that I talk to a lot of people about when it comes to authenticity, is content creators Ask that question of if I'm hiding something, does it mean I'm inauthentic? Or, you know, you feel like you have a dirty little secret with your audience or something like that because, you know, you have this thing over here and they don't know it. And you wonder, does this make me inauthentic or is there like an incongruency here? And it's such an interesting thing to think about because we all deserve the right to privacy. And privacy protects us from emotional labor and emotional processing of our deepest, most tender parts and the things that we do. You know, it's so natural to feel fear and vulnerability about certain parts of our life, about the way that we process or whatever. And that's why we have close, intimate friendships and relationships and family and people that we like share those deep parts with. We don't have to share that with the whole world. Like, that's. That would be insane to do that. Of course. It's a beautiful process to be able to get yourself to share some of the scariest parts of your story. And it's a cool self ownership moment to be able to share stuff like that in a TED Talk or on a podcast or on social media in any kind of way where you're like, cool. This is an inspiring thing to do, but it doesn't mean that you have to do it with every single thing. It just means that you get to kind of ask yourself the question, which parts of my life, which parts of my story are going to help me to share them and then also help my audience to share them and add to the narrative of the personal brand that I want to build. That's all up to you.

I love that I'm constantly navigating different things and I have some questions that I ask myself because I do want to share, just because I actually do want to feel connected to people. And sometimes it's so easy for people to look at a story and be like, oh, that's how they are. That's how it is. But there's so many things that we have to go in through the eyes of looking at everyone as is, their life might look perfect, but they may just be choosing to not share that. Like, they may just be choosing that they're not capable of being able to process that with everyone. And whenever I think of sharing something that's big, even if I'm like, I feel like I really want to share that so people know why maybe I've been more quiet or so people know why I'm showing up in the way that I'm showing up as. But I always think can I handle all the aspects of sharing if I share it? Like am I through the process, am I healed from the process or am I in the eye of the storm where if people go the opposite direction of support, can I handle that right now? And so there's a couple things right now that I'm not sharing because I'm like, I can't handle the other side of what could come with that. So that's not going to be a thing that I'm going to share. So there's just those pre questions of no, that's a place where we're going to keep that really safe and that's going to be able to like be a little protected seedling until I figure out what this thing is. So I want to talk about, you know, because you have a whole part in here about the protecting yourself from the dark side of social media. So share a little bit with me on that.

Yeah, so it's kind of what we're talking about, right? It's like what are all the amazing things about social media that you can, you can have a wealth building asset that will make you money forever, you can meet incredible friends and people and you can build something that was really meaningful to you. But social media is really a reflection of humanity, which also means it has dark sides, right? So some of the things that middle section in the book really kind of goes through, here's how obviously social media can be this like space that if you let it and you don't protect your environment and you don't protect what you consume and you don't create boundaries within yourself and the way that you use it, it can really come at you in that kind of way. So of course you can't protect yourself from how people respond to you, you can't protect yourself from what people say. But you can find a way to, number one, create the most peaceful environment that you possibly can in social media. Unfollow people that are not serving your highest good anymore, follow accounts that are going to be brain food for you or creativity food for you, or just like art or things that make you feel happy and actually produce a positive experience while being on social media. We're all scrolling at different times of the day. So. So creating a healthy environment for yourself from the get go and then also really thinking about what kind of boundaries do I need to put in place so I can feel protected and supported in my own personal process while I'm continuing to Courageously share my story, my dreams, my mission and myself every single day. So we all have those tender parts like we talked about. Keeping some things private, deciding who gets to have your vulnerability and when you get to share it is going to be your personal boundaries process. And also just recognizing that there will be many things that happen on social media that can bring up past traumas, it can bring up heavy emotions and difficult things just based on the fact that you are engaging in certain relationships with people that you don't know and you don't really know what's going to happen. You could have this fear of rejection come up if people unfollow you and you don't know how to process that. And that might have been something from your childhood that might bring certain things up. So it's really about recognizing like, yes, of course there will be difficult things about the experience of being on social media. There will be heavier things that you process and there will be some things that you cannot prevent necessarily. But there are ways to protect yourself further and support yourself building an environment that is as healthy as humanly possible through just, just the act of setting both physical boundaries in terms of how you communicate with people, what you will and won't allow on your page, in terms of other people sharing and commenting, but also just energetic boundaries. Energetic boundaries are really the things that you let affect you and the things that you allow into your space energetically as well. So if someone is being rude to you, how much are you going to allow that to affect you? Of course we can't control our emotions all the time, but we can sit and be like, you know what, someone's going to be a little rude. I don't have to let that swing my whole day around. I don't have to let that be something that like throws me off from my work. Maybe I need a social media detox. Maybe I need to take a break this weekend. Maybe I need to delete the app. Maybe I need to do something so I can just get back and re center myself.

I love that. At minimum, I tend to delete the comment just so I cannot go back and read it again. And some people screenshot it and read it and share with their friends. I'm like, the quicker that you can actually get it out of your head, the less you're going to stew on it and take it from every angle. So that's my very first step. So I'm curious for you. I know, you know, being a personal brand and then having a business and then especially for people who you know also have a company? Do you have a framework or a decision making process around how you even decide with all of the social topics in the world, what are you going to speak on and what are you not going to speak on? Have you thought of this question from the perspective of like, even your personal brand? Like, what are you going to talk on? When is it okay to be quiet? Even if people don't think it's quiet? We don't need to get into the nitty gritty. But have you created kind of a framework around that for yourself?

Yeah, that's a great question. I probably have an unconscious one, but now that I'm thinking about your question, my own relationship to my personal brand has evolved and changed over time. And, and what I'm really organizing my brand around now is much more like ways of being in terms of self development, in terms of talking about how we can be more aligned and authentic. And that's really what I want to talk about. So through that lens, I like to talk about business, I like to talk about spirituality, I like to talk about relationships, I like to talk about social media and branding. And within all of those topics, I try to think about, okay, I have stories that I can tell and share, but does that fit into the overarching narrative of what I want to be known for? And sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't. I'm like, sometimes certain things are not necessary for me to add my voice to this conversation. And those things it's like such a process to kind of figure out, like, what do I share and what do I not share when it comes to certain topics, when I want to add it to my brand. But if you think about your overarching direction that you're going and the things that you want to be known for and the things that you want to solve for people, whether it's your company or your personal brand, just think about, like, will this add to the overarching narrative of that or will it kind of be something that takes away from it or just kind of shifts the direction of how people perceive you? And it's such a personal thing because there's so many things that you can talk about that are personal and they just add to your personal brand and have people understand you better, whether it's like a book that you like or a social topic that you care about, but it's such a personal thing to kind of figure that out for yourself.

Oh, it's so interesting because having a company now as well that I'm going to be launching. It's kind of like when you're attracting people for a very different reason than your personal views, opinions, and people wanting to learn from those particular things as well. You now have a group of people who all believe very differently. So when you're stating something of potentially your belief, it's not necessarily company belief. That's when you can start to be like, what do I want this company to stand for? What do we post on here? It just creates another layer of creating another boundary potentially for, hey, I can say it over here, but for over here, because we have so many different beliefs, thoughts, and people, we're going to be like this over here and that's it. So it's definitely brought up. I'm like, okay, I'm going to read all of this book because it's brought up just a lot of questions around creating now this other personality outside my own. And what are those beliefs and standards and social? Like, how is that going to show up on social? How are we going to be. So I love this. I'm going to take it from that framework as well. Okay, so part three that you have in your book. And by the way, I love this that this is broken down into parts, because I love a good. I love some good sections in a book. I'm like, okay, we're on this journey now, okay? And you have covered so much in here. You guys, this is pretty crazy because I feel like this is our guidebook just for how to handle everything emotionally on social and also how to show up and how to let it be okay to make mistakes. Because like you said, we're going to fail. Like, we're going to not do this. Right, because we're human. And that's really what social right now, I think maybe is not allowing as much. So we need to learn how to let that be okay on our own, which is like the greatest work of all time. But you go into different sections. So part one is the foundation on becoming an authentic content creator. Part two, you have protecting yourself from the dark side of social media. And part three is building an authentic personal brand. And I think that there's a lot of people on here right now who are in that process of they are now especially listening to this podcast. They're people who want to take social, they want to be authentic, they want to be seen as a person, but they also want to make money or help people make money. So you talk a little bit about the nine stages of personal branding. Can you bring us a few points out from that the nine stages of Personal Branding.

Yeah, and it's such a great topic because of course, when you are figuring out what company you want to build and what business you want to have and what income streams that you want to create through social media, it's like you were talking about. A company is really like a second consciousness altogether. And it isn't only you as a person, it's something entirely different that can have a life of its own. So in the process of creating a personal brand, it's like, how do I blend that with my own beliefs and the own things that I want to talk about? And everyone's going to do it different. Some people are going to be more business heavy and some people are going to be more creating and building the personality through the business. And some people will be more personality and personally driven through yourself as a human. And then the things that you do externally that add to that experience. So whatever that is for you, it's going to be a journey to figure that out. But in the nine Stages of Personal Branding chapter, I really like that chapter because I wanted to talk about the experience of what it's like to really be developing and maturing as a personal brand. And I found this really awesome psychological model of development called spiral dynamics. And it essentially kind of walks through the emotional maturity process of becoming a person and, you know, figuring out yourself as you grow up and as you really develop, essentially. So it was very similar with how I view personal brand development. And in the first couple of stages of personal brand development, in getting started on social media, you start to question, you know, I'm not really someone that's a brand, I'm not going to be a brand that's for other people. And you reject it and you reject yourself in a way. And then you move into that stage where you decide to do it, but you're really a baby. You're figuring out what even do I say as a person and how do other people understand it. So you're in such a figuring out process and sometimes you outsource figuring out your own power by just looking at what other people are doing and either copying them or modeling them in a way where you don't fully trust yourself yet. And then you get to a place where you start to practice more and more and you're starting to really figure things out. And you get to a place where you're like, okay, I can trust myself more and me and my audience are figuring things out together. And then you get to a place where you're like, great, I feel like I've got things handled. I know what my audience wants. People are buying from me, people are saying yes to my products. We're getting engagement and things are going well. And then you can get to this place where you're like, cool, I got this. We're going smoothly, things are going well. But will happen inevitably for everybody is either you will change or the market will change, or your audience will change. Things that you cannot control, Things that happen when you're like, you know, a pandemic might hit and you're like, okay, now I'm at some sort of stuck point. And I thought I had everything figured out. I thought I had all the answers because I had this linear journey where the only place to go was up, up. And now I'm at a place where it's not necessarily only up anymore. It might be. It might be continuing to go linearly up, but it might be going in a different direction or now figuring out the next stage, which is really a reinvention stage of reinventing yourself in a bigger way, a brighter way, a different way, whatever that looks like for you. There will need to be at some point some sort of pivot out of the stagnation or the stuck point that you're going to hit with your brand. And again, that's going to be a personal journey for everybody. Whether it's for me, I've pivoted industries and started new things for other people. It's going to be just a bigger version of what they're currently doing and hiring more people or a team or doing something different than they're currently doing. And the next stage is really getting to this place where you're like, all right, I know that I'm going to go linearly up, and then I'm going to have to kind of refigure some things out again with my brand. I might need to redo my ideal client kind of understanding. I might need to recreate new assets for my business, like new sales pages, new products, new this, new that. Like you starting a whole new company. You got to do all that again. And you're like, gotta start from the bottom again. I have an audience, I have an asset. I have wisdom and knowledge. But ultimately, this new company needs all new assets, all new team, all new products, all new branding, all new audience and community building. And then you have to do that again. So the final stage, that is not really final, but it really is this kind of transcendence where you disconnect from needing things to be linear anymore and you're really playing in this different game where you're like, all right, I got a lot of skills. I know how the game of business and branding works. And now I'm just in a process of figuring out what is the most true and authentic in what I'm currently doing and how to optimize things in an even better way.

Oh, my God, I feel that so hard right now. Because when we hold ourselves to thinking it's supposed to look a certain way or go in a certain. Just step by step. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. No, it's sometimes it's like 5, 2, 1, 3. Like, it was the letting go of what I thought it was supposed to look like that actually freed me up to pay attention and get the things. Things done that really needed to get done and powerfully, too. So I love that you shared that because it's like, I think in every business and personal brand and all of the things, there's these moments where you just feel like you are in a tornado and, like, you'll never see a clear way through. And it's never going to feel all lined up and it's never going to feel like you have everything together. And then all of a sudden, you realize that, like, in order to have everything together, you have to learn how to, like, play in that storm. Like, let different players burn and let certain things not be the way that you want while other things are, because everything's always evolving. So that means while you're evolving, that means something's getting left behind. So I love that. I love, love, love that you shared that so much. Okay, what are some other things, just as we're wrapping up here that you're like, if somebody leaves with any message, like, something that really changed the game for me, like, one of the main things on social media that really allowed me to, like, grow, evolve and also grow my brand. What were some of those things for you?

The biggest thing is genuinely learning to trust myself and my intuition. The meaning behind that is there have been so many things that my intuition has guided me to do, like write this book that didn't totally seem logical at the time, writing a book, or, you know, I started a second company last year, and that was something so important to me, and I learned a lot of things that we ultimately had to pause the second company because of so many different factors. So being able to let myself evolve and being able to continue to trust myself has opened up doors that I never thought could have opened on both, like, a professional and career level, but also on a really deep personal level. There have been so many things that have happened through the failures that I've had of like that second company that I thought was going to be something and then ended up not being that way. But there's so much potent information that I got from that experience that was really impactful for my journey. And, you know, writing this book, that was something that kind of was this, like, take two steps back in order to take four steps forward. That didn't make entirely logical sense for my business because I had to kind of pivot and change what I was spending my time on and all of these different things that I had to do. But I know and deeply, deeply trust that the direction my intuition guides me, even though it might look a certain way to the outside world, I know and really deeply trust myself at this point because it's always taken me into bigger and better places. Even if it feels like there's a step back you have to take or you have to let yourself be seen as a failure for a minute, or like you don't totally know what you're doing, or like you are going to be a student again and you're kind of at the beginning again, or, you know, you are just adjusting something. Or maybe you have to pull back and you have to just be seen as someone that's pulling back for a little while before you go forward again. I think it's really powerful to let yourself kind of be in that process because so many people on social media are scared to let go from being seen as someone that's like growing linearly in success, I think, especially in the online business space. And we all try to show our best selves all the time. Whether it's like, cool, I got into this relationship and it looks great to other people and now I look like I've got that part of my life figured out. But maybe you get divorced or maybe that relationship ends or maybe a friendship ends and then you have to be in that experience of being like, exposed. But embracing the exposure for me has freed me more than really anything else that I've ever really done. And that has been one of the coolest gifts of social media is to feel eyeballs watching and then actually ask myself, do I really trust myself? Because if I do, then I have to be seen to be exposed yet again and feel what that feels like yet again. And every single time, it's proven me right. So it's given me such a deep opportunity to learn how to trust myself.

Oh, God, that is freedom. I can feel that from you. I can feel that when I think about it. I can feel that through the times that that has happened to me. And so a lot of times that. Not a lot, but the things that you are afraid of, if you can lean in and support yourself and read this book so that you know, you know, it's really about knowing what to expect and how you're going to handle it when it comes and like pre planning. So book is such a good guide for that. And I'm really excited for everyone to have this because I think that for our mental health it's needed because this is, it's not going away and we have to know how to function within this place and you know, especially young people. I'm an adult and I still struggle and it's like I've been on it for a long time and I have the boundaries and I even understand it and I have a support system and I still struggle. So it's important to even. I'm very excited about just going through your book over and over because it's such a good reminder because it's, it is a part of our life every single day and we can't, we can't run away from it. So we might as well have the tools and embrace it. So I'm so grateful that you wrote it. And you guys, I'm going to do a 10 book giveaway. So we're going to buy 10 books for the first 10 people to share this story with the link. You have to share this story from this podcast with a link to her book. Let's clarify. So tag Amanda Go on Amazon and all you have to do is grab the link from her book and share it as well in order for me to send you a book. So you guys, the first 10 people that I see, I'm going to reshare your story and then I'm going to send you her book followed. So it's an amazing book. I hope everybody goes out and grabs it and I'm just so grateful for you and how you show up in the world.

Thank you so much for having me. I so appreciate it. It's such a generous gift to offer everybody and I'm so excited for anybody who gets to get those books and anyone else who gets it on their own. So thank you so much for having me.

Yes. Go follow Amanda. Amanda, what is Your exact handle?

AmandaBuchi. B, U, C, C, I.

Okay. AmandaBuchi. Go follow. Go do all the things. Buy the book because you need it. Gift it to somebody else because they need it more. Okay, until next time, everybody, earn your happy.

Sam.