The 4 Components To Designing A Dream Life!

Dream lives are full of also stress and emotion. And I think that that is something that we don't need to avoid and know that it's all a part of it. But the more capacity you have for that, the more capacity you hold for joy. And we're back with another episode of He Said, she Said.

You know, I'm not going to make you do this every single time that we do. He said, she Said. I promise. Okay, well, God, but you probably don't even know this. I start every single one of my episodes, all my solo episodes. Something that I'm grateful for. I've been doing it for like, I don't know, a month or something like that. Wow. So what are you grateful for today?

I am grateful. So grateful for a weekend with you coming up with really no plans.

I know we have plans to have no plans. Oh, my God, this sounds so fun right now. So we've been going at such a crazy pace.

I'm just like so grateful right now to be really present.

I love that. I'm grateful for everybody who joined the dinner series. So I can't wait to have dinner with them.

I can't wait to meet them because that's really what I'm grateful for.

I can't wait to like, we are putting on dream freaking dinners and dream interactions.

So grateful for everyone.

I literally can't wait.

Like, honestly, you guys, you can do this for years and years and years and launch things and you're still, you still have so many butterflies around. Like, those people join.

Yeah.

People need to understand this.

We are so excited for the incredible turnout already and the names that are on that list. I'm just like ballers, Thrilled ballers in that room.

It is like an intimidating, in a good way, baller room. I was looking through some of the people we don't know yet. 400,000 followers. A million followers. Like multiple seven, eight figure. But it's a range.

It's a range all over the place, which is really exciting. It's definitely all doers or people who really have big dreams.

I'm really excited for it. Anyhow, there's like a few spots left. It was an overwhelmingly awesome launch and now there's only a few spots left. If you want to go check it out. If you want to have dinner with us three times this year and network with all these folks, go to Chrisharder Me dinner. Grab a spot at the table. Seriously, Chrisharder Me dinner. You can also go to loriharder.com dinner. Either one works now. Speaking of like Dreams and dream dinners and all that. We've accomplished a few dreams, one big one yesterday.

Oh, my God. All at once.

And we've just been like. It's weird because we're on two different rocket ships right now. We're checking a bunch of boxes in accomplishing dreams. And we're also on the other rocket ship that's going simultaneous, you know, up in the atmosphere with this thing of hard work and crazy schedules. So it's been like this crazy roller coaster of, like, I don't know if I can fit another thing in, and all of a sudden, oh, boom, dream happens, and I don't know if I can fit another thing, and all of a sudden, boom, another dream happens, and it's just been, like, wild, but worth it.

Okay, so I want to break this down because we wanted to share, because last week was a really, in all honesty, one of the hardest, most stressful weeks that we can remember, where we were like, is this worth it? This is so crazy. I don't know if I can take another thing, like, almost like breakdown mode, but also for both of us, but at the same time, which was super intense. But also we had all of the tools to remember that this is what expansion feels like.

Yeah.

This is what. When your capacity is growing. When your capacity is growing, it doesn't feel good. It feels really intense. And we also knew that there was a finish line. It's sometimes the universe, like, everything comes at once, and that feeling doesn't feel good when it's happening.

And that's what today's about. It's that finish line.

Yes.

All of that hard work, the moments where we're both, like, ready to break down. They are only worth it if you know where you're headed, AKA if you know what the dream is. If. If you know what the dream is, if you can visualize it, if you can define it, if you know why you're having the crazy moments that you're having, then it's worth it. If you don't, it's not.

And the most important thing. Well, that is, too. The top two are to also celebrate it. And there's some reasons behind that that we'll get into as we go along.

So, I mean, we really wanted to take this moment to ask you, do you dream anymore? And I know this sounds funny, but I was on a podcast yesterday, and the guy asked me. He's like, you and Lori seem to, like, dream a lot. You guys seem like you're dreamers. You know, Tell me about dreaming. Does this come Naturally, Is it a habit? And I realized when I answered him, I was like, wait, this is a real system that we have built around dreaming, and this is a real habit that we've built. So, you know, we're gonna ask you today, do you dream? Do you know how to dream? Or have you kind of lost that since you were a kid? Or are you in a stage of life where you used to be a dreamer and things used to go well, and then life kind of kicked your ass for a few years in a row and you've forgotten how to dream? Well, how do you turn that on? Right? You have to turn it into a habit. You have to build that dreaming muscle back up or build it from scratch if you've never had it. And that's what we wanted to talk about. There's really like four parts to being a really good dreamer. I'll give them real high level. And then we're going to unpack each one. But the four parts are, first, you have to have the container or the space built to regularly and proactively dream the dream and remind yourself of the dream. That's the first one. If you're not building these spaces or these containers on a regular basis, I mean, literally into your schedule, the way we do on our walks, that kind of thing, then it's not going to happen. You're going to lose that muscle. The second one is you then have to have the habit or build the muscle of being able to dream. It's going to feel weird at first, guys, if you're not used to dreaming out loud, if you're not used to defining what you want, if you're one of those people, like, oh, I don't want to say it out loud because I don't want to jinx it. That's the opposite of how it works. So the second one is you gotta build the habit and the ability to dream again. The third thing is you're gonna have to make sure your dreams are, of course, romantic and fun and exciting and visceral, but also measurable. You have to actually know where you're going. It has to be a real definable target. And the fourth thing is celebrating it when you get there.

I just wanna give some examples for each one.

Yeah, let's unpack them now. Let's start with the first one.

The containers or space. You have to have this. So for us, we'll just give the example. You guys have probably heard this a million times, but we do the Power nine every single morning on our walks. So we know that on our walks that is going to be the time that we connect, but also fill each other in on what we've been desiring in our lives. And we do that through the Power 9, which if you don't know what that is, that is three gratitudes each and then three excited abouts. What are we excited about for the day, the week, the month, the year? Whatever that looks like, whatever you want. And then what are three things you're manifesting? And I've noticed that the more that our dreams have kind of come true, the more we keep repeating the same ones until they come true.

Until they come true.

So we get really focused on exactly what that is. And I think a while ago I noticed they were more all over the place. It was like, well, I'd like this and I'd like that. And maybe it was a one year plan or a five year plan and I've gotten more like, what do I want right now in the present? And I feel like that's really helped me.

There's two more containers I think we do really well. You know, around New Year's we sit down and we dream, AKA plan out what we want for the next year. What do we want our life to look like, what goals do we have? And then we also have dream dates. We'll go out, we're like, let's just get a drink and sit at a beautiful restaurant and let's dream. Like, let's not go talk about today, let's not talk about the week, let's actually dream. So we really intentionally put these dream containers, right? And when I say container, I mean like these defined walls that you are going to go dream within. And then we do them on a regular basis. Can't do it once and think it's going to happen. You got to keep checking it. So the second one is building the muscle. So that's kind of related to what I just said. You got to build the muscle. So the repetitiveness of doing this, you got to lock it in. Like you said, you notice when we do our Power 9 every morning, the dreams kind of stay the same until we hit them. But then also you have to be able to build the ability. It's going to feel awkward saying out loud what you want, especially if you're saying it to somebody else. It's going to feel awkward if you've had nothing. But year after year after year of being defeated, you're like, who am I to declare I want this? Who am I to say I want to hit this? Or that, you know, I don't even have the talent or the people or the know how. Who am I to say that I'm going to have this life? So you got to actually be able to build that muscle and get past that.

And a couple things about that. It is going to feel weird and sometimes you're going to be saying things, you don't even know if you want it. And this is how you get to the place of knowing what you want. So there's a couple things you can do. I love starting with the sentence, wouldn't it be cool if. And maybe you do this alone. Maybe you try to write 20 things down. Maybe you say 20 things out loud. Wouldn't it be cool if. And that allows your brain to be like, I don't know. Wouldn't it be cool if I started a podcast and it made top 100 in the next year or two years? Like, does that feel fun? Wouldn't it be cool if I got featured in Forbes? Wouldn't it be cool if I got to speak on that stage, get really, really clear on exactly what it is and go back and look through or think through the 20 that you just said and find the top one to three that feel the most fun. And keep doing this daily until you get really clear on these are my top, like, one to three things that actually light me up, that actually feel good. So you have to get super creative with that. Cause I have absolutely been at a place in my life where I'm like, I don't even know what sounds good right now. I'm that lost.

I know. I know. And this might be the toughest step for people that feel down and out, that need the dreaming the most, is giving yourself permission to dream.

And it's because I've learned so much. And I'll share more on the last one about celebration. But I just did a podcast yesterday. I did three, actually, with Dr. Jordan Wiggins, who is a doctor that I partnered with for Glocee, my new company. And she also has a podcast called Pleasure Principles. And she says that if we don't practice this, we actually get into the doing part of our brain and we turn off the pleasure centers that even allow us to dream and even allow us to feel. So this is a really important piece of even just feeling. If you're feeling a little numb, if you're feeling like you can't experience joy, it's because you've turned that off and you've only been in doing or fight or flight mode.

Wow. I love that.

2026 is the year that you launch your business. It's the year that you've become the boss. You become the leader. That idea that you have that has been eating at you forever that just will not leave you alone is going.

To come to life.

Maybe it's something that someone tells you you always sell or a store you've already designed in your head. And with Shopify, 2026 is when you finally make it happen. Shopify gives you everything you need to sell online and in person. Millions of entrepreneurs have already made this leap from household name to first time business owners. Just getting started, you guys. I use Shopify for glossy and I remember when they sent me my little shopping bag celebrating my 10,000 sales and I literally cried because I was so scared to take the leap. And I'm so glad that I did and that I use Shopify. It gives you all the tools to easily build your dream store. You can choose from hundreds of beautiful templates that you can customize to match. Your brand setup is fast with Shopify's built in AI tools that write product descriptions and headlines and help you edit photos. So marketing is built in too. You can create email and social campaigns that reach customers wherever they scroll. So as you grow, Shopify grows with you. You can handle more orders, expand to new markets, then do it all from the Same dashboard in 2026. Stop waiting and start selling with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com happy. Go to shopify.com happy that's shopify.com happy. Hear your first cha Ching this new year with Shopify by your side. Too many people finish their workday feeling frustrated, drained and unfulfilled. I know that. I have experienced that myself. And the good news is it doesn have to be this way and you don't need a new job to fix it. Patrick Lencioni, author of the Five Dysfunctions of a Team and more than a dozen other bestsellers, created the Working Genius assessment to help you pinpoint the kind of work that gives you energy, the kind that lights you up, and it also shares the kind that drains it. So over a million people, including me, have taken it and completely changed how I lead and show up every day. If you're a CEO, an entrepreneur, or someone who just wants to level up in business and in life, Working genius is going to give you the clarity and confidence to operate in your strengths and find greater joy in what you do. Because confidence isn't pretending to be good at Everything. It's knowing where you're truly gifted. Take the working genius assessment today and get 20% off with code earn@working genius.com. that's working genius dot com. You'll be glad you did it.

So remember, the third piece of this was your dreams. Got to be measurable. Of course, it's got to be fun and exciting, romantic and visceral and like, you know, feel like you're. You're living at Disney World or something, like, whatever it might be. But it's also got to be measurable. So you have to know what your target is, where you're going. You know, as specific as I want this house in this neighborhood, or as specific as I want this event one day with this many people at it, or I dream of hitting this number in my bank account, or I dream of a day when this product is in people's hands. You know, this many products are in this many people's hands. It has to be a measurable dream as well, or you don't know where you're going. And the days where you want to give up, the days where everything is chaos or going wrong, if you can come back to the measurable dream and say, okay, I know why I'm doing this. I know where I'm going. I know what it's going to look like when I get there, then that keeps you in the game. But the other reason it's important for it to be measurable is you got to know when you get there. Yeah, like, hello, these are dreams. But if the dream is, I want a wonderful, happy life, that's not measurable. That's great. I hope you have that on a daily basis. But you don't know when to do the fourth thing, and that's celebrate. You don't know when to celebrate. If you can't measure when you hit that finish line, that dream.

This is so funny because we didn't plan this at all, but this is exactly what my course with Tony Robbins and Dean Graciosi is.

Celebration.

Oh, my God, is it really?

And we talk. We did not plan this at all. We do talk all about why celebration and the science behind celebration. And it goes along with what Dr. Jordan Wiggins was talking about on the podcast, is if you don't celebrate, you actually turn off that part of your brain that ever feels the emotion of joy. And when we also are afraid of feeling pain or letting in the idea of stress or, like, sitting and feeling what went wrong, we also turn off the pleasure center and the joy center. So the Whole idea is to celebrate more and to take that time to actually feel and get really present and just for tangible things, you guys, to understand how to turn the pleasure center back in your brain on it is to get really present with your accomplishments. It's to get really present with celebrating what you've done every single day. Like, the Power 9 is really powerful for that. No pun intended, but to be intentional and realize that even when you're in the stress, to be really proud of yourself, like, actually feel the emotions around it, like, yes, I'm stressed. Yes, this emotion sucks. Yes, I feel this deeply. But I'm also so proud that this is expanding my capacity. And then when you hit a goal, you say, okay, I'm gonna actually take time or take the day or take a moment to feel all of the accomplishments and be really proud of your hard work and go out to dinner and go celebrate with friends, make sure it's actually with people as well. Go celebrate an accomplishment with your team, even if you think you don't have enough time for it. Otherwise, you actually turn off that part of your brain which numbs you out.

Miriam, in our mastermind, did this wonderful job of this. She said, hey, when I hit this dream and it was definable, then I'm gonna take you, AKA her whole team and your partners to Disney World. And so they all worked hard towards the dream. Cause the dream was measurable, the dream was definable. They talked about the dream on a regular basis. Then they hit the dream and. And then they're all going to Disney World. Like, that is what we're talking about summed up in a nutshell.

Yes.

How cool if you got to do that for your business, for the people you care about, that help get you where you want to go. And how cool if you actually remembered what you want out of life instead of coasting through life. I guess if I had to sum up this podcast, it's really about that life is gonna pass by faster than you think. Minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day, week by week, and then year by year, and you say, where the hell did it go? Do you want that life to be a regular old life that you're like, oops, I missed it? Or do you want that life to be a dream life? Dream lives don't happen on accident. Dream lives happen by design.

Dream lives are full of also stress and emotion. And I think that that is something that we don't need to avoid and know that it's all a part of it. But the more capacity you have for that, the more capacity you hold for joy.

I love that. All right, guys, if you want to come to our dream dinners, go to lorihutter.com dinner or chrishutter me dinner. They both work. We'll see you at our dream dinners.

I am so excited.

Thanks for listening, guys. Love and appreciate you guys.