5 Reasons Why Men Disappear

Five reasons why men disappear. If you're confused by your man, if you're wondering why, show one moment he seems to care about you, he seems to love you, but then the other moments he's pulling away, he's not texting you, he's not responding, he's not leaning in emotionally, then this training is going to help you so much to understand what's actually going on behind the scenes within a man that makes him pull away from a woman, that makes him lose interest and decide that a relationship isn't for him. So that instead you can draw a man to you and have an amazing, loving, committed, long term relationship that lasts a lifetime. So hi, I'm Brody Boyd and together with my wife Antia, we've been helping thousands of successful women all over the world to have a loving, long term, committed relationship with a man they want. So let's go ahead and dive in. And as you can see, I have my lovely wife Antia with us today and she's going to help us with this powerful training. So actually, why don't you kick us off babe with the fifth reason why men are pulling away and that is.

Somebody because you asked to Independent, right? So obviously we're not saying that you're supposed to be codependent. However, like a man is really looking for a true interdependence in a relationship. Right. And why is that? Well, because he wants to make sure that he has a space, a place right next to you that he can support you, that he can provide for you. You see, if you say, and this is what happens with the women that come to me all the time, you due to their childhood wounds that have experienced and we can go more into details, the video goes on what they are, they become mis, independent and making sure that they don't need anyone. And then because they don't express any needs and because they don't reach out, right then, well, the man doesn't have like a role like to really fill and so therefore he's going to see if it can find a woman who has needs.

Yeah, it's so true. And men need to feel needed. If he doesn't feel needed by you, then what's going on for him is he's wondering why am I here? What's the point? A man needs to feel that he has a sense of purpose in his life. And the beautiful thing is you as a woman can give him that sense of purpose. You can be his mission, you could be his challenge. You know, we see a lot of guys, they love to play video games. They love to play sports and watch sports, and that's because they love the idea of winning. They love the idea of a challenge. They love the idea of accomplishing something and being of value, being of service to something greater than themselves, whether that's just helping their team win or saving the planet, saving the. Saving humanity. But also it can involve saving you, potentially saving your family or at least helping your family to win, which is your team. Right? You and him become a team, and then his mission becomes, how can our team win? How can I make you happy? And if he feels that you're too much of a independent boss babe that don't need no man and you got it all handled and you can do everything yourself, then he doesn't have that purpose. He doesn't have a mission. He says, you don't need me, so why don't you just be by yourself? I want you to be happy, and it seems like you're happier by yourself, so I'm just going to let you do that. Or maybe there's another man that can make you feel that you need him. There's another man that can provide for you, because I don't seem to be able to do that. So I'm going to move on. And that's why you have to watch out for. Especially if you're having a hard time asking for help, if you're having a hard time allowing a man to give to you, allowing him to provide for you in different ways, to do things for you, to lead, to teach you things, to handle things for you, even though you can do it yourself. And that's a beautiful piece, is like, you can do it yourself, but wouldn't it be so much nicer to have a man who can do it for you? These are keys that will start to unlock the gates to having that beautiful relationship. My. My video is looking a little choppy on my end. I hope it isn't choppy for everyone else. We'll see. Hopefully that that adjusts. All right, next point. Point number four. Do you want to take that?

Yeah. And that is really about. You send mixed signals. You start from the beginning with incongruency. Now, what do I mean by that? Well, picture this. You learn. You go on YouTube and you go on Instagram and all the reels. And for example, it says, well, act like, you know, like you don't really care and act, like, aloof and think things like that, right? So you show up like that. And so then the man is thinking, oh, this is the woman who, you know, who doesn't need anyone and who's like just, you know, kind of avoidant and, you know, someone who's also avoidant. Let's say a man who's also avoidant. We're going to go into that later. It's gonna be like, oh, that's perfect, right? Because now actually I feel safe because this woman doesn't want closeness and connection. She wants space, just like me, right? So that's one problem. And then the other problem is that if you act like, oh, well, I don't have any need. I'm not needy, I'm not clingy, right? But then as the dating process moves on, it will be revealed that you do have anxious pattern within yourself because you can't hide it, right? We can't 247 pretend we with someone that we're not. And then at that point the man is going to say, wait a minute. So in the beginning you are kind of like, hey, I don't need anyone. And by the way, this was me in my dating process too, where men always thought, oh, you know, she said so nonchalant, and she's kind of like a buddy, buddy. And you know, and then as time went on, I couldn't, I couldn't keep it a secret anymore, right? That I actually got attached to this man. And once I got attached to the man, then I started to act insecure. And then the man was really confused because he thought I was very, very secure in the beginning. And then. And of course, Bully will fill in here, but I'm sure the men is going to say at that moment, wait, then who, which one are. Which version? Are you. Are you the insecure one? Are you the secure one? And then what did you want it to manipulate me? Can I trust you? Like so. And the confused mind says no, right? So if a man is confused and, and loses trust, especially if he's more masculine, like he's going to be like, when you want. Let me just kind of think about this, right? We're just going to put some breaks on this because there's something that's a little confusing. It's a little off. Can't put my finger on it, but I'm going to just see if I can connect with someone who's just a little bit more congruent and I feel like just a little bit more safe around.

Yeah. Now the other aspect of this is you want to give a man a map. Because if a man cares about you and he's not a broken man, if he's healthy man at all. He's going to have a sense of wanting to make you happy. He's going to want to win with you. We talked about how a man, masculine energy wants to win. It wants to accomplish things. And so you as the feminine are creating a map for him that's giving him a path to the treasure, a path to that hidden buried pirate treasure, you might say. Which is one reason why I think young boys are attracted to these kind of stories. They want to uncover, they want to find that gold at the end of the tunnel, they want to win again, it goes back to winning. And so what you can do by giving clear signals to a man of who you actually are and what actually makes you happy, that he can meet your needs. Someone was asking in the comments, do we make up a need? What kind of needs? Well, your needs are what you need to feel happy and content in a relationship. What do you need? Whether that's regular check ins, whether that's affection, whether that's a man verbally telling you that he cares, or a man protecting you, providing for you, being there for you, or committing to you. These are all needs that can come up, but also in your, in your basic life, what are your needs? Your needs, your basic needs for shelter, for food, for experiences that you enjoy, for a lifestyle that you enjoy like a man can help provide these things for you. And being clear about those needs, being open with him about those in the right way, using feminine communication, you can give him a map that it gives him a path that he can see that path to victory, to win with your heart, to make you happy. And if you're sending mixed signals, you're giving him like different paths, or you're pretending that you don't have the needs, or you are acting like your needs one thing when it's actually something else. Like we'll hear. Oftentimes couples will argue about dishes like, I need you to help around the kitchen, I need you to take out the trash. When actually what they're really needing is they want their partner's attention, they want their partner's love. And they're not talking about the right needs, they're sending a mixed signal. The guy, he's just listening to your words and thinking, oh, she's upset about the trash. He doesn't realize you're actually upset because you're not getting his attention, you're not getting the love that you want, the affection that you want. And so if you can communicate properly with him and give him a clear map to your heart, now he can win and he knows how to. And he'll feel good about it when it's presented in the right way. So when it's presented respectfully and vulnerably, which again goes back to using magnetic feminine communication properly, which will teach you. So let's get to the next point here. Well, actually before we get to that, speaking of learning magnetic feminine communication, if you haven't yet, I would highly recommend for those listening taking our free Magnetize youe Man quiz, which is a powerful resource that will help you have a map to get to the relationship you want with your man using the right communication tools, using the right feminine polarity principles, the advanced principles that we have a whole path for a 90 day challenge. You can get that by clicking the link in the comments below or going to our website magnetizeyourman.com to pick that up. Now you could also click on our bio and there's many different places you can find that in our world. But that's the next step that I'd highly recommend taking if you haven't yet. So all right, let's get to our next point. You want to take that antia.

Yeah. And that is number three is he has a past wound. And you know what that means that he has his own unique timelines, times at which point his fears coming in. So for example, for me, right, I had sort of a three week timeline when I started to act a little funny and then at a three month timeline when I started to act a little funny. And, and what I mean by that is when I hit that particular time, that particular time frame, my nervous system started to feel dysregulated. But I no longer felt grounded and I never, no longer felt safe. You know, I felt like there's something off, right? And of course then you project it out onto the partner. So then this particular man will project it onto you and say like, well, it's because this is not the right relationship for me, right? But the reality is the reason why he feels a little bit off after three weeks or three months or whatever it is, right? I've heard all the different timelines, or maybe it's the states, you know, after six dates or 10 days is because he hit his, what I call vulnerability, what you could call emotional intimacy threshold. So when someone hits their threshold, they feel friction, right? Again, this discomfort. And nobody wants to feel discomfort, you know, nobody wants to feel uncomfortable. And that of course comes from, well, from his own childhood. You know, maybe he had an alcoholic parent, right? So he started to like make sure that he's taking care of himself and that he doesn't trust anyone else, that he doesn't get close to anyone else. You know, maybe he had a really over doting mom, right? Maybe had a controlling mom, maybe had been absent that. So there's many different reasons, but because of that, this particular man decided that love is not safe. And then love to him looks a certain way at a certain time, if that makes sense, right? So he starts to feel more connected. Now he's like, okay, that's no longer safe. And so therefore, I'm out of you.

Men can have their wounds show up in many different ways. Like Antj mentioned. The other piece of it is that if a man is being triggered in the relationship or he's having wounds come up in the relationship, a big piece of this is that it's not your job to help fix his wounds. Sometimes a man will pull away because he's a broken man. We call it a broken man because he's broken. There's something inside of him that's not allowing him to really connect to another human like you to have a deeper, more intimate relationship. And that's why it's so important. We have a process that we take our clients through, which is the 90 day challenge, the magnetizer man or magnetic feminine 90 day challenge, as we call it. And you give a man, you give a relationship 90 days. There's a process you go through in that 90 days. And basically the reason why this is so important is because you don't know what's wrong with a man. You don't know what's going on with him. And you need to have a period of time where you are using your best ability to be the best partner you can be, which means connecting to your feminine energy using magnetic feminine communication. All the other tools that we'll give you, how you clean up your side of the street to be the most magnetic, feminine, queenly woman you can be, which is going to make your whole life better also, by the way. And you will attract abundance with men, with other relationships, with your career. But in that process, you're also testing the man in a way because you're being your most magnetic, attractive self. You're connecting to who you really are at your core. That is that shining light of magnetic feminine power. And then he is going to respond to that. He's either going to respond to that by getting past his wounds, working with his wounds, being open with you about his wounds, communicating, coming closer, wanting to take care of you, wanting to provide Wanting to be your hero or he's going to start flatlining, which means he's not engaging, he's not improving, he's not coming closer to you, he's not responding well, which means you're likely dealing with a broken man. Unfortunately, now you don't want to fix a broken man. You can't fix a broken man. All you can do is control yourself. You can't control him. And as long as you're trying to control him, you're actually in masculine energy. You're going to push him away even more. All you can control is yourself and who you're being as a woman. That's your feminine power. And if he's not changing, if he's not stepping up into that level of care towards you, that devotion, then unfortunately, you're likely dealing with a broken man. And it's going to be his decision at that point. He's either going to pull away or he's not. But you can't chase him, you can't try to fix him, you can't change him. All you can do is show up as your best self and that's what's going to bring him back. If anything, or if it's clear that he's a broken man, you should actually take it as a sign that that's a gift that he left, that he didn't respond to you being your authentic self in that way. And that another high quality man is going to come into the picture very soon because of who you're being. But I want to give you that warning, that caveat. Avoid trying to fix a man, avoid trying to change him, because that's only going to lead to pain for you and likely also some pain for him. So let's get to the next powerful point here. And by the way, if you're listening and you have some questions, go ahead and start posting your questions in the chat. I already see some coming in. We're going to be answering a few questions shortly as well. Let's get to this next point here.

So, and this is the tough truth sometimes, number two is he was never really into you, right? And yes, some men are good actors. And then on top of that, your wishful thinking, projecting the best case scenario onto him, where will feed into creating this illusion, right? This fantasy. And so I hear so many women say, well, I know, you know, he showed up for me and he bought me flowers and he called me every day. And so what does the woman do in that moment is like, so I'm like, so what? What does that mean, Right, like, so she made it mean, like, well, he's into me. And also that he's going to continue on with that consistently, which is a dangerous assumption if you haven't seen that yet. Right? So, like, that's one thing it's, like, to really see, okay, when somebody starts to show up positively, okay, let's see how it continues. You know, let's not project that onto the man unless he actually tells you and gives you very specific dates, sets particular milestones, so to say, in place, Right. That really show you that your level of emotional intimacy is advancing. Right. He may not actually be as committed as you think he is. Right. Boy and I, we just had somebody in our program, and she was totally in an illusion, and this man was totally somewhere else and was not committed to her whatsoever. And part of the reason also is there was quite a bit of distance in between as well. But, you know, sometimes, like, hey, he was never really that into you. You know, Actually, a year ago, Buddy and I, we listened to a podcast, and it was about this woman, and she called in and she said, you know, I. I met this guy, and, you know, know. And now he, you know, he even, you know, we went to whatever, the bar together, and he invited me on a date, right? Which, by the way, it turns out, caveat. It wasn't a date. And she actually kind of invited herself. And then, guess what? They brought the guy on. So that was, like, part of the show. And then the guy's like, who's that? You know, Emma or whoever, whatever her name was. And then. Oh, Emma. Yeah, we just, like, met volunteering, and, you know, and she just asked what I do afterwards. And then I said, you know, I'm gonna go to see my friend at this restaurant. And then she showed up, right? And she called it a date. And then she was upset at him, so he was never really into her. Right. So there was no case. And so so oftentimes, some women who are more the Anxious Attachment Style Scale can do that. Right. It can create a reality that's actually not existing.

Yeah. And that woman. So the other thing that she did is she said, you know, we were so connected. We had such a strong connection. I know you felt it. I know you felt it that night. And he was like, I don't know what you're talking about. Like, we were just talking. We were just hanging out. We weren't even on a date. I didn't feel anything. And so she, again, was making up in her mind because she felt so strongly connected to him, that he must also be feeling that towards her, which is an illusion, it's a false reality. But it's very seductive to get caught in that because you want to believe that you, the people around you, that they, that he feels as strongly as you do when it's oftentimes not the case, unfortunately. Now, the other piece of this is at the end of the day, it almost doesn't matter what we're looking for. With everything we teach you in our 90 day challenge in the magnetic feminine polarity, the magnetic feminine communication is we're looking for whether a man is showing care for your heart or whether he's not showing care for your heart. If he's showing care for your heart, that means he's showing up, he's providing for you, he's leading and making decisions. He's committing to you. He's showing you love and devotion and adoration. And if he's not showing care for your heart, that means he's doing the opposite of that. He's not reaching out to you. He's not showing up, he's not being your hero. He's not wanting to listen to your feelings or care about your feelings or ask about your feelings or help you in any way or provide you with gifts and love and devotion and affection. And he's probably pulling away, he's probably seeing other women. That's not showing care for your heart. Now, the only way you can know, because a man's either not going to show care for your heart, either because he's broken like we talked about, or, or because he doesn't care for you, but at the end of the day, it doesn't really matter. It just. That's what we're looking for. Is he showing care for your heart? Is he not? And if he's not showing care over time and you're using everything we'll teach you in the 90 day challenge, that means you're likely dealing with a broken man or a man who doesn't care. Either way, the result is the same, which means you need to start stepping back, you need to start detaching. But likely, when you use everything we teach you, you're going to instead draw him closer. You're going to activate that masculine devotion and love within him because of the law of polarity, and he's going to come closer and he's going to start showing care for your heart. He'll actually start to, to like you. But you know, there are some cases where he never had that love and affection in the Beginning. And it's really hard to generate in that case, because even if you're using everything that we taught you and he still wasn't feeling it, sometimes he's just not a match. And that's something to accept as well. But that's part of detaching from the outcome, which is what we always say. You commit to the process, you detach from the outcome. But the key here is that you are committing to yourself first and foremost. You're committing to that process, to be that most magnetic, amazing, attractive woman that you are at your core. We're just bringing her out like that flower blooming and showing its full spectrum of color and light and beautiful smells. That's what's going to draw him in. So it's a very important piece. All right, let's get to the next piece here.

And of course, that is, number one, you keep choosing the wrong kind of man, and that's based on your own past wounds. So sometimes you can feel this attraction or we put certain values on men who are hard to reach. Right. And this, of course, comes from childhood programming. If you had, for example, I see this a lot with my women, you know, if you had, you know, a parent who was emotionally unavailable, who was stoic, who worked long hours. Right. And of course, also who has. Was abusive, alcoholic, things like that, is that then you seek that kind of energy in a man again. Right. In other words, if you experience like a healthy kind of energy, you call it boring, so you mislabel it, and you also don't value it. You know, because we always tell women, tell us, like, well, nobody's pursuing me. Is that really so? Well, you know, there's men pursuing me, but those are the ones that I'm not interested in. Oh, tell me more about the men that you're not interested in, why you're not interested in them. You know, I don't. I don't really know. Right. They're like, great, great on paper, you know, and not even bad looking, but it just. I just don't feel attracted to them. Right. And I know why you're not feeling attracted to them, because your nervous system doesn't get triggered because those are actually healthy. This is a healthy man. And that will actually only their parasympathetic nervous system response, which naturally is not aggravating. There's no trigger. It's just. It feels like how I felt like when I met Brody, which was like a calm lake. Right. But however, you know, like when you have, like, more anxious attachment style and you're looking for a man who's hard to reach and hard to connect with and you need to fight for his affection and you have to turn yourself into a pretzel, you know, because that's what you had to do with your parents. Then this is going to feel like this is not a match, right. I'm going to look for someone who, where I have to spark and where I have the passion, you know. And honestly, that burning fire that you feel is actually saying, well, hold on, hold on one second, right? This energy is actually reminding you of your wound. Because if you think about how does a wound actually gets formed is. Well, isn't that burning first, in the first second before the wound firms formed? Yes, that's the burning that you feel. Right. But because we also have, of course, cultural programming and all of that, that we are trained, right. That this heat that's burning, that automatically means it's passion and that also means it's the right man. And then it's. The story goes into a never ending loop of this is my soulmate, this is my twin flame. We have karmic, you know, with karmic partners. And so now it gets into a very dangerous territory, right? So if you're, you know, the man may disappear because you know he's ghosting on you because he was, this is the kind of man that he is, you know. And you need to actually heal your wound so you're no longer attracted to a man like that or even give that man the benefit of the doubt.

Yeah, we used to call this attraction anxiety. When you feel attraction for a man or you feel anxiety for a man, but your system, your wounds are interpreting that attraction as anxiety, anxiety as attraction. And it's a false mechanism that can happen based on wounding that will mislead you in your love life, in your relationships. And so we want to watch out for that. And the solution to this is that sometimes you have to lean into the discomfort of being with a man, going on a date with a man that you don't necessarily feel anxiety or attraction for, because oftentimes those are merged together and it can become very hard to separate those two. And that's why if you give yourself some time, and especially if you work with a coach like us, helping unpack some of these deeper wounds and heal these deeper wounds over time, what will happen is your system will start to rewire that you're now set to actually attract a healthy masculine man who is there for you, who takes care of you, but then eventually who you will also be Attracted to. Sometimes that attraction won't come right in the beginning. You'll be like, well, I don't really feel the spark. I don't feel butterflies. But he was. He was a gentleman. He showed up well, he took care of me. He paid for the bill. He's, you know, communicating well. And it's like, okay, well, what if we start to get your system used to that? Even though it feels uncomfortable that you're still showing up and giving those guys a chance, it doesn't mean you have to be with those guys, but you're giving those guys a chance to start rewiring your system, that it's okay to not necessarily feel that spark, that attraction, those butterflies in the beginning. Cut. Because those can be coming from wounds, and it can be very dangerous to use those as a signal for which guys you should choose, which guys you should be with. And it's a. It's a mental rewiring. It's a heart rewiring. That can happen, but in that process, you can heal your heart. And now the next level of this is how do you actually communicate those feelings with a man? How can you have a conversation with a man about the fact that you're feeling anxiety or about the fact that you may not feel attraction? To give the guy a glimpse into your heart to be able to have those kind of conversations, that you can start healing your heart wiring by vulnerability by actually revealing what is happening for you at any moment so that a man can understand and he can do something about it. Maybe in those conversations about you not feeling attracted to him, it can be more of a conversation that of what you would desire from him. So maybe there's something he's not providing yet that would make you feel more attracted to him. How do you bring that up? Using magnetic feminine communication to let him know that you would love for him to be more decisive or to lead better or to dress better or whatever the thing might be, or to maybe be more. I mean, there's so many different ways a woman can feel more attraction to a man. But what are some of those traits that actually could help you to feel more attracted to him and to actually bring those up to allow him to understand and actually want to do those things for you more. So that's. That's more advanced because that's. That's basically you being open in a relationship, no matter what the issue is. And that lack of attraction could potentially just be another issue that can be brought up to him where he can then be able to be your hero. And solve that issue and actually make you attracted to him by him stepping into his mask and energy in that moment. So that's going to be a big key. And now we're going to start answering some questions. Actually, from the chat, I've seen some questions already coming in. So if you have a question about your current relationship situation or anything we talked about in this video, go ahead and post it now and we'll answer as many as we can in the time that we have to help you with that. So let's bring on the first one. I already answered here. So Tia said, at what point do we become a team in the dating process? Do you want to talk about that? Antia.

Well, and, and, and part of it, like, we already answered, like in the chat too, but it's really about, you know, I, I would say, first of all, it's identifying where's your action coming from. Is it coming from a place of fear? Right? And that would be like, okay, it's coming from a place of manipulation because you're in scarcity and you feel like unless I manipulate, I don't get what I want or do I come from a place of love, right? From a place of trust, from a place of expansion. So it's a part of becoming a team is actually finding the courage to come from a place of trust, from a place of abundance, right? So, for example, when I became a team player in the relationship with Brody was when I told him, look, oh, part of me wanted to manipulate you because I was upset about him leaving dishes in the sink. I'm sure it was something like that. I don't remember exactly what it was, but it was something that triggered me. And, you know, and then a part of me thought, oh, I could just guilt trip him, right? So by me actually acknowledging my true intentions, what I wanted to do or what part of me wanted to do, but me also choosing not to do that, I became a team player, right? Because I'm actually like, being authentic and transparent and continue to build the trust towards my husband as opposed to, you know, a lot of people are like, adversaries and even in the dating process and every saying, well, I have like my secret weapons and I'm going to use them when I don't feel safe. You know, I will remove myself from the conversation, I'll pretend I don't have anything to say, and I'll just punish you with a trouble draw, right? Or I will manipulate you, or I will sub, you know, or manipulate you with my charm to get what I want, you know? But in any case, it's actually like I get what I want, and I actually don't care anymore if you get what you want. So that's like a big distinction there for you, Tia, in addition to what was already mentioned in the chat.

Yeah. And what I would say is similar to when you're dancing with a man, you become a team. When you're dancing well, when you are fully in your feminine energy, he's in his masculine energy, and now you are in the dance together, and you're harmonizing through your polarity. That's when you become a team, which means you being fully in your feminine energy, connected to that, having an open heart, being vulnerable with him, using feminine communication, letting him lead, letting him make decisions, trusting him, respecting him. And then when things change, you're able to talk about that. You're able to bring it up when something's not working for you, when he's not leading well, when he's not taking care of your heart and giving him a chance to adjust and actually help you and seeing if he does help you. But really, when you're in that dance and he's healthy in his healthy masculine, you're in your healthy feminine. That's a big part of when you're becoming a team and you're moving from just dating to more of a partnership, just like in a dance, it's a form of partnership. Right. And a good relationship is like a dance in that way. All right, so another question we had here was from. Well, we had a couple here. Harriet said good night from Barbados. Glad you're joining us. Harriet and Karen said, how do you best communicate direct signals? So I'll take that one. I'm trying to remember what we were talking about when. When this came up. Yeah. So a signal is when you are like the flower opening your petals, and this, the beautiful vision of that flower is becoming apparent, and the smells and the scent and the attractiveness is becoming apparent to the honeybees to know what's going on. Now, another way of putting out a feminine signal, another analogy for this is when a woman drops her handkerchief back in the day to signal to a man that she was interested. That's like a signal. Right. And so for you to be in your feminine with a man, it means signaling to him rather than chasing him, rather than initiating, you are signaling, and you're giving him an opportunity to help you. Whether that's because you're signaling your interest through the metaphorically dropping of the handkerchief or through your eye contact through Your body language, smiling at him. These are all feminine signals of interest, or if it's through communicating that there's a problem, asking for help. Just like also that metaphor of the damsel in distress who's calling out for help. And the knight in shining armor hears her call, just like in the movies Hercules, the Disney movie where Hercules was on his horse and they were flying and all of a sudden they heard this woman screaming. And he's like, oh, we need to help. And he came down and he helped save her from this giant. And that's the idea of a man understanding, oh, this woman needs me. This woman can benefit from my provision, and I want to give that to her. I want to be the hero. I want to be this knight in shining armor because it feels good. So how do you communicate that to a man? How do you let him know when you have a need, when you're open? Well, that's where feminine communication comes into play, where you're able to share primarily your feelings with a man using I feel statements and the simple statement of, for example, saying, I'm feeling anxiety right now and I don't know what to do, or I'm feeling some sadness, or I have some anger coming up. And then you can go into. When he asks you, why are you feeling anger? And more of that can be explained to him when he leads you to actually want to know more. And you can follow our whole feminine communication formula that will teach you how do you have those deeper conversations with a man that opens up your heart and signals that you need help, that you value him, that you appreciate him and what he has to offer, and then he just wants to give it to you. He wants to give more. He wants to be that hero for you. And he starts to fall in love because he feels needed. Just like in the movie Hercules, he fell in love with Meg because she needed him, and he was able to provide that for. Even though she was also standoffish to him in some ways, and she was kind of a independent boss babe, but deep down, she still needed him. Deep down, she still wanted him. And he could feel that. And that's what kept drawing him back to her. Do you have anything else you'd like to share on that? Snucky.

Yeah. And. And, you know, I had some sort of energetic so response in my body when I saw direct signals. And, you know, how can we send signals that are not necessarily, like, direct? Because when I think about direct, I feel like really sort of a piercing masculine energy. Right. So how can we send a Clear signal, but still a feminine signal, if that makes sense, right? Where the man is sort of the direct energy. Because sometimes women are just kind of zooming right in or asking just directly the question. And, you know, and so that's oftentimes where man feels like, oh, again, you know, whoa, that's a little much. You know, and so a lot of men would say, what? It's just, whoa, it's a little oof. And I don't know if they're going to. Everybody will maybe say what. What words they use. But I would say, like, maybe overwhelming or just a little much. By the way, I just want to clarify something that doesn't mean that you are too much, because I get this all the time, that women are afraid. Here's Hercules saving me. So I use all the time from women, you know, being afraid. Like, see, I don't want to be too much, and I don't want to be too emotional, too bold and too bright, right? Like, I'm not saying any of this, right? As a matter of fact, the more you can be yourself, the better. Right? But to do it in such a way that it's inviting and welcoming, right? As opposed to, like, kind of piercing and forcing and pushing, you know? So that's maybe one thing I want to add here with the direct signals. And then another thing is also to open up to it, but also saying, you know what? Like, I'm not going to attach to the outcome, right? Because I don't really know this guy. So again, like, really watching, like, am I projecting something onto the sky? Right? You know, or am I just saying, you know what? I'm going to open myself up, but it's this or someone better, right? Because I don't know this guy. You know, maybe God is saying that this guy is, like, not a good idea, you know, I mean, that's like, not a match for you. So. But the guy who stands behind him is.

Tia said, okay, I guess I need to express my needs more. Yeah, that's a big piece. It's knowing how to express your needs in a way that's also not disrespectful. And also not telling him what to do is key. Which is, again, why we go so deep in our courses, in our communities and our coaching into feminine communication. Because this is really where the rubber meets the road in a relationship, how you communicate the needs and the desires of your heart so that he doesn't feel that you're telling him what to do. He doesn't feel that you're disrespecting him or emasculating him or mothering him or trying to manipulate him. But instead he just simply feels your beautiful, open, feminine heart and wants to connect to it, wants to help, wants to make you feel better, wants to make you feel happy. Because then he gets to feel like a hero and he also gets to feel connected to you. He gets to feel your heart, which men have a harder time connecting emotionally. So that's why it's so important when you use feminine communication. It's like creating a bridge from your heart to his heart where now he's like, oh, I understand, I empathize with what you're feeling and I want to make you feel better and I don't want you to feel bad anymore. And if I contribute to that, I don't want to do that anymore because now I get it. And he's not feeling instead like, whoa, you can't tell me what to do, or I didn't make you feel that way, or I'm not responsible for your emotions. Like, we don't want to trigger those defense mechanisms, which is what a lot of women unfortunately do when they're communicating with a man, when they're sharing their heart. If they raise his walls because of how they're communicating, because they're subtly crossing his boundaries often and they're subtly disrespecting him and subtly telling him what to do, they don't even realize it through the basic statements like you don't care about me or you're making me feel upset right now, or you hurt me with when you said this. Those things will raise his defenses because for one, it's an accusation. Oftentimes it's blaming him, it's criticizing him, and also the implication is that he's not being a good man, he's failing as a man. And that's just going to make him not feel good. As opposed to gratitude and appreciation will lift him up, make him feel like a hero. Somebody else was mentioning this in the comments, but we want to balance both of those. You want to be able to share appreciation and gratitude when he's doing things that are good, that are helping you, that making you feel great. And you also want to be able to speak up and share your heart when there's things that aren't feeling great and aren't feeling good. And that's the delicate balance of being the queen, where you are kind and gentle and feminine, but you're also self valuing, self respecting and self honoring, which means speaking up, which leads into what Tia also shared, which is her boyfriend started rubbing her feet and she told him how much she liked it. And so now he wants to do it. Exactly. Remember, men want to make you happy if he has any level of care for you. And he's not a broken man and not a deeply broken man. He just needs a guide. He just needs a map, a signal to know how to win with you. And one of the best things you can do to give him that signal is your feminine appreciation, letting him know how he makes you feel in a positive sense when he is doing the right things so that he gets it and he wants to do more of it. He gets those points and he's winning and he feels like, yes, I accept this challenge, I want to keep doing it more. Again, assuming he's a healthy man and he has already any level of care for you. All right, let's get another question up here. So Julia says, why do men just talk about sex? Well, Julia, I would say that's a interesting statement because that's not our experience oftentimes with men in the, in the women in our communities that men are not just always talking about sex. However, this can happen and often this is happening mostly online. And if you're on, if you're doing a lot of online dating right now, of course you're going to be attracting a lot of men who likely do just want sex. And now the key is how do you share with them the impact of that, how it makes you feel. And that's part of the feminine communication formula is it always starts off first that we teach our clients with, what are you feeling? What emotions does that bring you up? When a man is asking you, you know, to show him your boobs or to ask him what ask you about when you're going to have sex or when what you know what you like and it's just becoming inappropriate because you're not ready yet. You're not there yet with him. He's understanding, oh, shoot, I'm dealing with a high value woman here. She has feelings, she's sharing those feelings. She's speaking up, and I don't want to make her feel that way. And how can I correct my own behavior because I choose to and not make her feel uncomfortable anymore? Do you have anything to share about that?

Yeah. And then also, you know, there's oftentimes a reason why we attract men who are more like sort of on an animal level. Right. So why are you attracting men who are more on a surface level? I mean, yes, online dating, unfortunately, yes, There is a percentage of men that are just going to be like that. Right. So you could have to filter a little bit. Right. But however, if you find this to be like consistent, then it could also be because like you're attracting that because there's an incongruency inside of yourself. You know, we oftentimes find that women come to us and attract that kind of men into their life that they obviously wouldn't start like an emotional, intimate relationship with. Right. Is that the woman herself has a parts conflict, for example. And so what I say, what I mean by that is that like a part of her wants to have like the deep connected long term relationship. However, the other part inside of her wants to protect herself from getting hurt and from getting disappointed and from being rejected because that's what their unconscious expectation is based on what they experienced in their own childhood. And then so guess what? Just because they are of course sending mixed messages, how we were saying early on, into the world, into the dating world, into the dating pool, then I get responses from men who are also conflicted inside of themselves. Right. And so one way how a man expresses when he's also conflicted is like keeping things on the surface or keeping feelings on the sort of animal level. Right. Because it's obviously like less vulnerable and it feels also like, yeah, it's, it's, it's just more primitive. Right. It doesn't take that much energy.

Yeah. And the other thing I'll mention, Julia, is if you're attracting a lot of men who just want sex with you, or they're just talking about sex with you versus wanting to date you or wanting to have a relationship, it's often because they're bonding more with your body than they are with your heart. And that likely means that you're putting off some form of masculine energy, usually through distrust or lack of trust or defensiveness, or you're protecting yourself in some way, which makes sense, you want to protect yourself. However, if you're hiding your heart, if men aren't able to connect to you, your feminine core, your feminine energy, your feminine essence, then all they have is your body. That's all they have to go off of. They're not having any, they're not seeing any other value there, they're not seeing any light. And so we, we teach you how to open your heart, how to be vulnerable, how to let your light shine so that a man is connecting to your heart and is valuing your heart and is falling in love with your heart, rather than just seeing your body and Just seeing the sexual aspect of you that he. That he is only. That's all he has to go off of. And you're only going to attract those kind of men as well if that's all they have to go off of. Rather than with your open heart and your feminine energy, you'll attract a higher level of man, you'll attract a higher quality of masculine men, and they'll actually want to connect you from a deeper place. So hope that helps with that. And then. So we have some other good questions coming in here, too. We'll get to a couple more as we have time for. So Christine says, I feel like he's pulling back with communication about two and a half months in, but I'm also very anxious about response times. How do I talk to him? With femininity. Okay, so he's pulling back with communication, but you're also very anxious about response times. Yeah. So basically you need to bring that up with him. So the key here will be to have a magnetic feminine conversation with him where you can actually share how his behavior is making you feel, whatever that behavior might be, whether that's him not communicating with you as much, or if he said something hurtful, or if his communication is just starting to lack that level of care. It just seems more businesslike, like he's just being polite with you, but he's not really, like, interested in you. He's not connecting with you emotionally. Then you're going to have emotions around that. And I would ask you now, what emotions does that make you feel? How you feel about the whole situation with him right now? You mentioned anxiety. So you're feeling anxiety. You may be also feeling some sadness. You may be feeling some frustration, you may be feeling some uncertainty. You know, did I do something wrong? Did I say something wrong? Is he dating another woman? Is he no longer interested? So the key here is how do you communicate and the need to communicate those feelings with him? And that's again, where we have our whole feminine communication process. The formula really, to open your heart to a man. And it takes some nuance, it takes some understanding of this. But the basic idea is you ask for a conversation with him, you ask for a phone call. Are you asked to talk in person respectfully, which is a huge piece of feminine communication. Asking permission. So saying, may I ask if we can talk on the phone or may ask if we could talk in person? Or is it okay if I share a feeling that's coming up for me with you, and then you have a conversation on the phone? Ideally, or in person. You don't want, you want to avoid doing it on text because that's just going to allow him not to really feel your heart because it's just going to be letters and numbers on a screen versus him having a heart to heart conversation with you. That's why they often call it heart to heart conversation. We need him to feel your heart. We need him to feel the impact, what's actually going on, which is your feminine core. It's your vulnerability. That's what's going to draw him in, that's what's going to pull him close. Because that's the essence of your feminine. And masculine energy is by default and by definition really attracted to feminine energy. Opposite energies attract. That's the law of polarity. This is a basic law of the universe. Masculine energy is attracted to feminine energy. If he feels your feminine energy, he feels your feminine heart. He's going to be drawn in and he's going to want to help you and connect with you. Assuming he's not a broken man, which is, there's, there's a lot of broken men out there as well. There's about anywhere between 5 to 15% of the male population is a broken man. It's just a matter of how broken he is. There's a lot of deeply broken men that are narcissists, they're sociopaths, they're deeply wounded and they're just not going to be able to give you what you want, no matter what. So we want to see if he's that kind of man as well. He may be, he may not be. We have to see. We have to use the 90 day challenge really to give it a chance to shift this relationship. If you really care about this guy, then I'd highly Recommend Taking our 90 day challenge and taking our free quiz to get access to that in the links in the comments below. And that'll get you started because we have to give it some time to have these conversations with him. You may have to have this conversation several times and do it in the way that we'll teach you that he understands your heart, he knows what you're feeling, he knows what the issue is. The problem that you just shared with me here, which is that he's not communicating with you as often, the response times have diminished and then he can understand and then come closer to you. Do you have anything you would like to share on that? Anything else you'd like to say?

Yeah. And then also when it comes to response times, we always need to be you know, when a man notices that you get like really anxious if you don't hear from them, from him within 12 hours, 24 hours, because you, you know, you're used to hearing from him every so often, right? Then he also asked himself, well, wait a minute, you know, she doesn't even know me that well and she's already getting anxious, right? And does she actually want to get to know me? Or is it that she wants to project sort of a relationship onto me without even getting to know me, right? So in other words, does she just want a boyfriend and a partner, period? It doesn't matter who it is, you know, so that's like another piece too, because it says, like, you know, naturally speaking, you get to know someone, right? So you're not projecting, you're not becoming anxious because you're just starting to get to know them. You know what you get when you get anxious? It's because you're already projecting onto them that it'll be all end all. You put them on a pedestal, you know, you. They become the source of your happiness. And so that's also something to be aware of, right? Is it actually like reasonable time frames or are you already freaking out if you, you don't hear from him in a few hours? Because that also means that you have a very low tolerance for discomfort. You know, so one thing I teach my women to actually increase their tolerance for discomfort, AKA increase the capacity to receive, right? And what that means is actually being willing to be vulnerable, being willing to be in the unknown, being in the uncertainty, as opposed to. Because when you say get anxious about response time is that you want to try to close the loop. You want to be in the known, in the certainty, as fast as possible. But why, you know, like, that doesn't tell you anything. And it also doesn't help you to foster vulnerability, true, authentic vulnerability. Because true, authentic vulnerability also carries a little bit of discomfort with it as well, right? Because if you're trying to close the loop and you're trying to rush response times and things like that, right? Then you're also more likely to laugh over something that's not funny. Because.