How Men FALL IN LOVE

Here's a quote that might make you uncomfortable, but it needs to be said. The woman who tries the hardest to prove she doesn't need a man is the same woman desperately wondering why she can't get one to commit. And before you click away thinking I'm some kind of misogynist trying to put women in their place, I'm actually trying to help you to get out of your own way. Because what I'm seeing is an epidemic of incredible women doing the wrong things and getting all the wrong results. I'm Brody Boyd with Magnetize youe Man. My wife, Auntie and I have been married for 11 years. We have two amazing children. And for over 20 years combined, we've helped thousands of women all over the world. The world. To attract the committed relationships they want. And I'm going to tell you straight up, most of what you've been taught about attraction is backwards. It's just ineffective. It's sabotaging you. So before I tell you what actually makes a woman irresistible, I need to clear up three myths that are probably ruining your dating life right now. And I'm warning you, some of this is going to trigger you. But that's how you know I'm hitting on something true. Myth number one, men are intimidated by successful. Every time I hear a woman say, men are just intimidated by me because I'm successful, I know exactly what's actually happening. And it's not intimidation. Here's the brutal truth. Most men don't care about your success when it comes to attraction. Your six figure or seven figure income doesn't make you more attractive. Your corner office doesn't create chemistry. Your master's degree doesn't make him want to pursue you. And before you get defensive, I'm not saying that those things are bad. I'm happy that you're successful. But you need to understand something. You being attracted to a man's success doesn't mean that men are attracted to your success. That's you projecting your feminine values onto masculine men. It's like a guy thinking that you'll be attracted to him because he has great hair and wears fashionable clothes. Like, sure, that's nice. But that's not what creates deep attraction for you, is it? What's actually happening when men seem intimidated by you is this. You've been in your masculine energy so long at work that you can't turn it off. You're leading conversations. You're making all the decisions. You're solving all the problems. You're competing with him and you're Correcting him. And he doesn't feel intimidated. He feels unnecessary. Let me tell you what a man is actually thinking when he's with a woman in her masculine she doesn't need me. She's got everything figured out. She's going to criticize everything I do. This feels like work, not a relationship. I'm out. That's not intimidation. That's him recognizing there's no polarity, no chemistry, no role for him to play. You're not looking for a partner. You're looking for an employee or a trophy to parade around. In our coaching programs, we teach something called the king Queen matrix. And one of the biggest insights women have is realizing that they've been operating as the king in their relationships, trying to control everything and then wondering why they keep attracting what we call a shadow lover or a little boy. Men who are passive, avoidant, or just not stepping up. It's because you've taken all the masculine space. There's nowhere for him to be. Myth number two, being vulnerable will make you look weak. Now, this one pains me because it's exactly backwards women think. If I show him I need him, I'll admit I'm struggling. If I'm too emotional, he'll think I'm weak and leave. So you put on this mask of having it all together, of being fine, of not needing anything or anyone, and then you're shocked when he's not emotionally connected to you. Listen to me. Vulnerability is not weakness. Vulnerability is the door to intimacy. And when you hide your heart from a man, when you pretend you don't have needs, when you act like you're totally fine all the time, you're not protecting yourself. You're preventing him from falling in love with you. I sometimes call this the misconduct too cool for school syndrome. Let me be specific here. I'm not talking about dumping all your emotional chaos on a man. I'm not talking about having a meltdown every time something goes wrong. That's not vulnerability. That's being unhealed and making it all his problem and his responsibility. Real vulnerability sounds like this. Can I share something with you? I've been feeling anxious lately, and I noticed. I'm telling myself that maybe I'm not as important to you as I'd like to be. And I don't know if that's true, but that's what's coming up for me. That's feminine communication. That's what we teach in our Advanced Magnetic Feminine Communication course. You're sharing your experience. You're not attacking him. You're not telling him what to do. You're just opening your heart and giving him a chance to step up. And here's what masculine men actually think when you do this. Oh, she trusts me enough to be real with me. She needs me. I can make her feel better. I can be her hero. And that's when his protective instincts kick in. But most women never give him this opportunity because they're too busy pretending they're fine. They're. They don't need anything. They've got it all handled. And then they wonder why the relationship feels shallow. Myth number three. The right man will just know what you need without you saying anything. Oh, man. This one. So many women are walking around thinking, if he really loved me, he would just know what I need. I shouldn't have to tell him. And then you're resentful when he doesn't meet needs he doesn't even know you have. Let me tell you something about men. Men are not mind readers. We're actually pretty simple. If you tell us what you need in a feminine way, in a respectful and vulnerable way, we'll probably do it. If you expect us to figure it out through hints, size and passive aggressive comments, we're going to fail every time. But here's the thing. You've been taught that asking for what you need makes you needy. You've been taught that a quality man should just get it. And that's setting you up for failure in our Magnetic Feminine 90 Day Challenge, which is something we use to help women detach and see if a man is actually right for them. One of the key practices is learning to ask for what you need in a feminine way. Not demanding, not nagging, but genuinely asking for help and then receiving with appreciation when he gives it to you. May I ask if you could help me with something? Can I ask for a call sometime today? Would it be okay if we talked about something that's been on my heart lately? This is you signaling your needs in your feminine. And it gives him the opportunity to be the man to step up, to provide for you emotionally. When you do this and he responds you, you appreciate him. You make him feel like a hero. And that's what keeps him pursuing you. Now let's go into what actually makes you irresistible. And I'm going to give you the insider's perspective. What's actually going through a man's mind when he meets a woman he can't resist. Number one, she's feminine. When most women are masculine. I'm going to be really direct here. The biggest Reason? Quality. Men aren't pursuing you has nothing to do with your looks, your age, or your past. It's because you're in your masculine energy. And. And masculine energy repels masculine men think about magnets. Same poles repel, opposite poles attract. That's polarity 101. That's the law of attraction between masculine and feminine. Here's what I see all the time. Women meets a man, she's interested. So what does she do? She starts doing things for him. She plans the dates. She sends good morning texts. She tries to solve his problems. She gives him advice and introductions and recommendations. She gives. She buys him gifts. She cooks for him. She cleans his socks. She's basically pursuing him while wondering why he's not pursuing or investing into her. And from a man's perspective, this can feel smothering. It feels like you're trying to be his mother, his mommy. It feels masculine. And there's no chemistry when there's no polarity. Let me give you a real example with this. So I had a client, let's call her Sarah, who was doing everything for the guy she was dating. She'd pick him up, plan all the dates, pay for things, give him massages. She thought she was showing him she cared, but he kept pulling away. Why? Because she wasn't giving him anything to do. She wasn't letting him be the man. She was literally doing his job for him. When we coached her to stop doing and start being, to stop giving and start receiving, to stop leading and to start following, everything shifted for her. Suddenly he was pursuing her. Why? Because now there was space for him to do. So here's what you need to understand. Feminine energy is magnetic. Without effort. You don't have to chase, you don't have to pursue. You don't have to do anything except be. Be present, be open, be warm, be receptive. And the right man will be drawn to that like a moth to a flame. Number two, she makes him feel like a man, not a project. Okay, this one might sting for you, but I need to say it because I see it constantly. There's a big chance you're actually not looking for a man. You're looking for a project. You're looking for someone to fix. You're looking for someone to improve, to mold into your ideal partner. And let me tell you what goes through a man's head when he feels like you're trying to change him. She doesn't accept me. She doesn't respect me. She thinks I'm not good enough. Why would I commit to someone who I feel like a failure with. Now, I'm not saying you should accept bad behavior from him. I'm not saying you should be with a man who treats you poorly. What I'm saying is there's a massive difference between coaching a man and. And appreciating a man. Here's the secret. Men move mountains for a woman who makes him feel respected. A man's deepest need in a relationship is respect, not love. Women need to be cherished. Men need to be respected. When you understand this, everything can change for you. So what does respect look like? It's appreciating his efforts, even when they're imperfect. It's thanking him for things he does. It's not criticizing him in front of other people. It's asking for his opinion and actually considering it. It's letting him lead and following his lead. And even when you might do it differently, it's letting him do it on his own and even make mistakes sometimes. And that's okay, because he's learning. I've been married for 11 years, and you know what Auntie does that keeps me wanting to give her the world? She makes me feel like I'm winning. When I do something for her, she lights up. She appreciates it. She thanks me. She makes me feel like I'm her hero. And that makes me want to do even more. But I've talked to so many men who feel like nothing they do is good enough. Their woman criticizes them, constantly corrects them, nags them. And then they wonder why he's not romantic anymore, why he's not pursuing her, why he's watching football or playing video games or scrolling his phone instead of spending time with her number three, she has her own life and isn't waiting around for him to complete her. This is counterintuitive to a lot of women. You think if I want a man to commit, I should make him my priority, Right? Wrong. When you make a man your whole life, you become a burden, not a blessing. Men are attracted to women who have their own thing going on as well. Women who have friends, women who have hobbies, women who light up when they talk about their passions. Women. Women who aren't just sitting around waiting for him to text back. Now, it's a balance here between having your own life and also allowing him to provide for you as well. Here's what's going through a man's mind. If you don't have anything going on in your life, if you're just waiting around for him, he thinks she's going to be clingy, she's going to be needy, she's going to smother me. I'm going to be responsible for her entire emotional state. But when you have your own full life, when you're hanging out with girlfriends who lift you up, when you're pursuing your own interests, when you seem happy and fulfilled already, you. He thinks, I want to be part of that. I want to add to her already good life. And here's a hidden secret. When you're happy with a man, a man automatically and unconsciously believes that he is responsible for that happiness. Again, another reason that he can feel like he's winning with you. One of our clients, Avni, she was so focused on finding a man that it consumed her entire life. She was on the dating apps, constantly going on dates multiple times a week, analyzing every interaction. She was exhausted. And the men she met could feel that desperation. When she finally shifted her focus to herself, to her purpose, to her building female friendships, to doing things that brought her joy, to getting the coaching and education she needed, her energy completely changed. She stopped radiating. I desperately need a man to complete me. And started radiating. My life is already full, but there's room for the right amazing man to come into my life as well. And that's when she met her now husband, who pursued her relentlessly. Number four. She can share her heart without trying to control the outcome. This is advanced level stuff, but it's crucial. Most women think they're being vulnerable when they're actually being manipulative. They share their feelings as a tactic to get a man to do what they want. Let me explain. If you're sharing your feelings and internally you're thinking, if I tell him I'm sad, maybe he'll finally commit. That's manipulation, not true vulnerability. And men can feel it. We might not consciously know what you're doing, but something feels off and we will pull away. True vulnerability is sharing your truth and being completely detached from how he responds. It's saying to yourself, I'm going to be honest about what I'm really feeling. And whatever he does with that information is up to him. This is terrifying for most women because you want guarantees. You want. You want to know that if you open your heart, he'll respond the way you want. But that's control, not trust. Here's what I teach in our coaching programs. When you share vulnerably with a man, his response tells you everything you need to know about him. If he steps up, if he shows care for your heart, if he Tries to help you, great. He might just be the right man for you. If he dismisses you, if he gets defensive, if he makes it about him, great. You know, you're now dealing with not the right man. Either way, you win, because you get clarity. But most women never get the clarity they need because they're too afraid of being vulnerable in the first place. Number five. She trusts him to lead, even when it's not perfect. Now, let me tell you something that might shock you. Men don't actually want to lead women who fight them the whole way. And that's what you may be doing without even realizing it. He suggests a restaurant, you suggest a different one. He plans a date. You change the plans. He tries to solve a problem. You tell him he's doing it wrong or that you're going to do it yourself. And then you wonder why he stops trying to. Here's what goes through a man's mind. Why am I even bothering? She's going to do what she wants anyways. She doesn't trust me. She doesn't respect my decisions. I'm just going to let her lead because that's clearly what she wants to do anyways. And then the relationship loses all polarity. You become roommates, not lovers. Now, I'm not saying you never speak up. I'm not saying you go along with everything that he wants to do, even if it makes you genuinely uncomfortable. But there's a difference between sharing your feelings about something and criticizing his every move and trying to control him. Think about it like ballroom dancing. If you're constantly correcting his lead, pulling against him, trying to lead yourself, the dance simply just falls apart. But when you trust his lead, when you follow him, when you let him guide you, even if it's not perfect, the dance becomes beautiful. In scripture, it talks about how Sarah called Abraham Lord and respected his leadership. Now, modern women hear that and freak out. But here's what they miss. Abraham also cherished Sarah. He listened to her. He valued her input. It was a partnership, but with clear polarity. That's exactly what we teach. It's not about being a doormat. It's about understanding masculine and feminine roles and letting those create the magnetic attraction that keeps a relationship alive. Number six. She knows when to walk away without drama. Now, here's something that makes a woman irresistible. Self respect. The willingness to walk away from men who don't treat her well. Without anger, without drama. Just simple detachment. Now, I've seen this over and over. Women will tolerate terrible treatment from men because they're Afraid of being alone, afraid of starting over. Afraid that they won't find anyone else. There's something in psychology called the sunk cost fallacy, where you've already invested so much that it would be too painful to just walk away and leave all those losses on the table. Similar to why gambling addicts become gambling addicts. But you know what men think when you tolerate bad behavior. She doesn't value herself. I can do or get away with anything I want here. But when a woman has genuine self worth, when she's willing to let go of a man who isn't right for her, that changes everything. Because now men know they have to step up or they'll lose you. One of our clients, Celine, was dating a guy who kept going hot and cold. Instead of having dramatic conversations, she simply detached. She focused on herself. She didn't play games. She didn't punish him. She just pulled back her energy. And you know what happened? He panicked. He realized what he was losing, and he stepped up. Now, she didn't do it to manipulate him. That's the key. She did it because she genuinely valued herself and decided she wasn't going to tolerate inconsistent behavior anymore. And that authenticity is what made it work, because it made it real. This is a big part of what we teach in our 90 day challenge. How to detach from the outcome. How to observe a man's behavior objectively. How to walk away from men who aren't right for you, without bitterness or resentment. Number seven. She's rooted in something bigger than the relationship. And now we get to the most important point. A woman who makes a man her God will always be disappointed. But a woman rooted in her faith, who has her own relationship with the actual God, who trusts his plan for her life, that woman is irresistible. Here's why. When your identity is in Christ, you're not desperate, you're not clingy. You're not making a man responsible for your happiness. You're already full. You already have full purpose in your life. You already have worth. And a man gets to join in on that, not create it. Proverbs 31:30 says, Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing. But a woman who fears the Lord, she will be praised. Now, this isn't about being religious. This is about being rooted. It's about knowing who you are. It's about having a foundation that doesn't shake when a man disappoints you, or even if a relationship ends. I can tell you from my marriage with Antja, our faith is something that deeply bonds us when things get hard, and they will get hard, we come back to God. We pray, we seek his wisdom, we trust his plan. And that's what allows us to build something lasting. But here's what I want to be really clear about. You can do everything I've talked about today perfectly. And it still might not work out with a specific man. Because not every man is your man. Not every man is capable of receiving your feminine energy. Some men are too broken. Some are narcissists, and some are just not ready. And that's okay, because when you're operating from these principles, you're not trying to force a man to commit to you. You're being the woman God created you to be. And the right man will recognize that and pursue you. But you have to trust in the process. You have to trust in God's plan and God's timing. You have to be willing to walk away from men who aren't right, even when it's hard, even when you're lonely, even when you're deeply in love with them. Even if you're thinking there may be nobody else better out there for you. And before I wrap it up, I need to say one more thing that's crucial in all this. Focus on being irresistible. To mention, don't forget to check in with yourself. Are you actually into him? Are you just excited that somebody wants you? Or are you just addicted to the chase and the emotional unavailability and hoping that you'll finally be able to convince a man to stay with you? I've seen so many women work so hard to get a man to commit, and then once he does, they realize this wasn't actually what they really wanted. They just wanted to be chosen. They just wanted to win. But now they're stuck in a relationship with someone that's not actually good for them. Don't do that to yourself. Don't settle. Don't convince yourself that good enough is good enough. Wait for the man who's actually good for you, who lights you up, who you could build a real quality life with. Before you actually commit to anyone, take it to God in prayer. Ask him if this is the man he has for you. Ask him to reveal the red flags you're missing. Ask him for wisdom and discernment and be willing to receive whatever answer he gives you, trusting that his plan is better than your plan. Now, if you're just sitting here thinking, okay, Brody, this all makes sense. But I have no idea how to actually do this. I need help with the specific how to for my situation. Well then I highly recommend that you take our free Magnetize youe Man quiz. Just go to our website magnetizeyourman.com or click the link in the description or comments below. This quiz will help you to identify your specific blocks, whether it's childhood wounds, anxious attachment, masculine energy, whatever, and give you a personalized plan to start attracting the relationship you actually want to with the man you want. It takes only two minutes and you'll get perfect clarity on your situation right away. And if you want to know exactly what to do when a man starts pulling away or ignoring you, make sure to watch this video right here called if a Man Ignores you. Never Chase. Do this instead because what I teach in that video is a game changer for handling these situations without looking desperate or losing your power. All right, thank you for watching. I hope this was helpful. Now go be that irresistible woman that you were always created to be.