Men Can’t Resist Women Who Do This

Love being with you. How do you draw him close? How do you make him enjoy every second you spend together? Where a man feels that this is the woman I see myself with, I don't want to lose her because we just have such a good flow going. We have such a great connection. It just works. This is my soulmate. Without a man losing interest, pulling away, or breaking up with you. So my name is Brody Boyd, and together with my wife Antia, who's here today, we've been helping thousands of successful women all over the world to get a loving, long term, committed relationship with a man they want. So let's go ahead and dive in today. So we are going to be talking about the principle of dancing with your man. Literally, but more importantly, metaphorically. How does dance and the principles of dance show up in your relationship? So I have my wife here. We're going to talk about this and particularly we're going to talk about a, a metaphor that we know of because we were literally at a dance class today. In fact, me and her were taking our first tango lesson together, Argentine tango. We were starting to learn. We actually just signed up for a package of classes that we highly recommend. We're going to talk about our lessons that we got about relationships and what you can learn in your relationship with a man, whether you're just dating him or you've been in a. Been married for 10 years. The same principles apply. How do you create that masculine, feminine polarity and that difference in the dance, that ex. That exciting energy, that, that passion, that polarity, that devotion, even from the dance. So let's start it off and I'm going to actually let my wife share. We'd like to hear, I want to hear first her experience of what she learned about polarity, principles. And I'll share my experience from our first tango dance class today.

Yeah. Oh, my gosh. So I love, first of all, the reason why we did this in the first place is because, you know, we have two kids and we've been married for almost 12 years. And so we are first and foremost also looking like, how can we enhance, you know, things that we can do as a couple right? Outside of being mom and dad, outside of being business owners. Right. But actually like fostering and nourishing and nurturing like our marriage. Right. Because your marriage is actually, or your relationship, it's like a baby, you gotta feed it. Right? And so, and I'm thinking, you know, we talk a lot about dancing to our women and why not actually take dancing classes as a matter of Fact, Brody signed us up, which I love that he took the lead on this. And actually, the funny part was, what the assumption normally goes is that the man is somehow being dragged into dance classes. Because the first question that the dance instructor asked us is if Brody's here voluntarily. And I was like, oh, wow. He has no idea of the dynamic of our relationship. And I gotta admit, I was a little nervous. And the reason why is, you know, from my childhood, there's still pieces of, like, where I feel like I need to be perfect. And, you know, I did something new, I could mess it up. I could. I could embarrass myself. And it's funny because actually, I don't really care about it. But then I. My body or my nervous system does care about it. So it's kind of, like, really interesting. And I asked Brody. I'm like, I'm a little nervous. Like, are you nervous? He's like, no, not at all. And of course he wasn't, because when I met Brody, the first thing he taught me was west coast swing. So Brody just loves dancing. Like, he is very smart in his body. He has a good connection to his body. And I think what I noticed right away was, for me, I would say, like, fear kicked in for sure, like, when I started to do my first steps. And look. Hello. This is unconscious, right? Because it's like I'm learning something new, and I'm being in the unknown, and it's. I'm like, oh, this is, like, so perfect. Because we always tell our women, like, okay, embrace the unknown. Make the unknown your friend. The uncertainty is your treasure map, and so on. So I got to experience that, like, literally on a visceral level, and I got to really feel what that's like in my nervous system. And so, of course, in the beginning, I had the story that body was laughing about me, right at me. And that was probably because my mom was laughing at me. And, of course, Bori wasn't laughing at me. You know, I mean, he was also learning the steps as well. But that was the story I was telling myself. I was like, oh, my God, he's probably already thinking. And then immediately, what flashed back was me going to an art. Wine. Wine. Art of the wine, or whatever that those classes are called, where you're basically being instructed how to paint. And painting has also been, well, like, a weak spot for me, I will call it. Okay. And so I thought, like, oh, he's laughing at me the same way how he was laughing at me when I didn't paint the Right. Dimensions. Because, yeah, Brody is, like, basically good at everything. Like, he's perfect, you know, and so the story goes, so. And of course, nobody's perfect. Right. But so that was coming up for me. And so I got a little bit into my head, and I was like, oh, my God, here's choreography. Last time I think about dancing, I got kicked out of a dancing team when I was, like, 12 because I was not good at choreography and so on. So those are just, like, a couple pointers. I'm going to just throw it back to Brody. I could go longer. But what's. What's. What's been coming up for you so far?

Yeah, well, I mean, we want to hear about what you learned so we can. So the women can apply this. You know, that's the. That's the whole point here is what can they apply based on what our experience was? Because you said you were having all these stories coming up, but what. How did you break through that?

Well, I mean, one part for me was to submit to Brody. I mean, luckily, I've been practicing that for a while, right? So it's like, okay, my brain is saying one thing, but my other thing is like, I trust my man. And so by that, I actually let him lead, as opposed to me leading or me taking the steps. If he doesn't take the steps, it's like, okay, aren't you just surrender, Surrender, trust. So I think that's like, the first thing that I did to quote, unquote, overwrite, you know, the stories that I had in my head. And of course, I would still recommend connecting with that afterwards, because, of course, those stories come up for a reason. Right. They're not fully healed yet.

Yeah. And it's very important. What. I got away from this as well, got from this dance class today, because I've danced like Auntie said, I've danced in the past. I've done west coast swing dancing and some other ballroom dances. And I learned a lot when I was in my early 20s about dating and relationships from taking dance classes. That was one of the big reasons I did as well as the other big benefit of meeting other women and having an easy way to meet them. Because we're dancing, we're in a group, we're in a class, and it's expected to connect. But you learn so much about masculine, feminine polarity from a dance, any dance, any partner dance. You are learning how to let the man lead, how to follow his lead, how to let him guide you. Trusting him, respecting him in that dance. Now, of Course, if you have a man who's not leading you well, who's not dancing well, he may need to learn. He's learning the steps. And that's why it's so important to be in your feminine, because you inspire him to be a better masculine partner, to be a better lead for you. And so a lot of it is showing that trust first. Just like what we teach in our 90 day challenge, you have to go first. You start stepping into your feminine core even more, and you inspire him into his masculine core. And then what happens is he starts to lead. He learns how to hold the frame like in the tango dance we were doing today, how to move you, how to plan things, even if you're both taking a class together. That idea is you're learning together how to have polarity, just like what you're doing here with us. You're learning from us how to do the dance of relationship. You're learning how to work. What are the steps? What is the rhythm? What is the tempo? And he also is setting that tempo for you. He's setting the pace in your relationship. So to be in the feminine, to be able to surrender, to follow him, to appreciate him if he's doing a good dance, to enjoy it if. If he's doing a good dance with you, but also if he's not leading well over time, to be able to speak up about that or ultimately to walk away from a dance where a man isn't leading you well, where he's not taking charge properly, he's not holding a great frame for you and it feels unsafe or it feels unenjoyable, or maybe he's stepping on your toes or he's bumping into you. Now, that's the interesting thing we learned today also about tango dance, in particular Argentine tango, is they sometimes call it the battle of the feet, what we learned from our dance instructor. Because when you're so close to somebody, when you're so intimate and you're moving around, it's, It's. There's a liability there that you will start to bump into each other and may even. May even hit each other or hurt each other or step on each other's feet. And so unless you're really in tune with each other, you're connected and you're learning the steps and you're also following properly, and he's leading properly. It can turn into something a bit chaotic, maybe even conflicting or tense or argumentative or like a fight. And so that's part of the dance as well. It's learning how to navigate that intimacy properly with a man, which a lot of it is what we teach you here with magnetic feminine polarity. Magnetic feminine communication. How do you handle conflict? How do you handle that connectedness with a man where you are intimate, you are emotionally, physically, potentially, mentally, spiritually intimate. How do you handle that without penetrating him energetically or bumping into him, or if he's also not leading? Well, if he's bumping into you, how do you handle that? So that you get back into a flow, you get back into the proper dancing where now it's enjoyable. Now you can actually surrender and let go and just follow the music, the beautiful music of the dance. So do you have any thoughts on that, Snuggie?

Yeah, 100%. I thought it was like, really interesting. I forgot what they call it, a dance, like off center or something like that. So you're actually. And that reminded me of the interdependence. Right. It's not like you're like face on. You know, like from a nervous system standpoint, it's actually nice to be a little bit, you know, your partner's a little bit to the side, so you're with him, but it's not like you're staring at each other. Right. It's like. It's kind of like a little intense. What really was saying it's like a little bit penetrating. And then the other piece also was, you know, he broody. His arm actually started to get tired. And it was because I had sort of like my weight. My arm was like laying sort of like on his arm. And I'm like, oh, that makes so much sense. I can do that sometimes unconsciously in a marriage. Right. Instead of like going into interdependence. Right. Like actually holding your own arm, which I ended up doing in the second half of the dance. And what I found when I was holding that right, for one, it was obviously more enjoyable for us. But also for two, I felt like there was like a new respect, reverence for myself. I was just kind of just holding my own and present and I'm here, but actually kind of. I'm also like caring myself as well. Right. And so you. We were just talking about that after the dance, how that's really that sort of this healthy interdependence, Right. Where you have an individual identity and then you also have the couple identity as well.

Yeah. So it is. It is so true because what we're. What I was realizing from that is if you're in a relationship with a man and you are Putting too much weight onto him. As far as you are depending on him for everything, then he will need. It's not that he's going to lose devotion for you. Because I still wanted to dance with her when I noticed my arm was getting tired because she was putting the weight on my arm so much. It's not that I didn't want to dance with her anymore, it's just that I was literally needing to take a break at some point. It's like, oh man, my arm's getting tired here. And so what will happen is a man will just need to withdraw more often. He will need to get space, he'll need to go to his man cave more often. When you're depending on him for everything, for your sense of self, for your sense of love, for your, for him to do everything for you, to provide everything for you. And so there is a balance here. Like you, a man wants to feel needed. He wants to feel that he can lead, he wants to provide for you. That's what healthy masculine energy does. It gives and you receive as the feminine. And however, if it's too much, where you can't even, you literally can't do anything for yourself. And that's like the very extreme right? When you're not even eating for yourself, you're not, you're not getting enough sleep, you're not taking care of yourself, your basics, then he may just need to pull away more often to recollect himself, to rejuvenate, go into the bear cave which we talked about in the last training, and then come back. And so you can be helping to balance that by either intentionally creating space where you're like, you know what, I'm going to give you a little bit of a break myself. Like I'm going to hold a little bit of my own energy, I'm going to come back to myself, I'm going to improve my self care with activities, with hobbies, with hanging out with girlfriends, friends and family that lift you up, investing in yourself like you're doing here with your education, with your awareness, getting coaching, support. So you're, you're investing, you're bringing the energy back to yourself so that now there's more of a balance where he can, then he's going to withdraw less often, he's going to need to pull away less often. He's still going to feel needed, he's still going to feel appreciated, he's still going to be able to help you with things and you can ask him for help with things, which you should in the right way, in a respectful, vulnerable way. But he's not going to feel like it's constantly being demanded of him. Because also, you don't want to feel entitled to that where it's like, you have to carry me. You have to do this for me. I demand it. Otherwise I'm going to be a bitch and I'm going to be attacking you or being upset with you because you're not fully carrying all of the weight yourself. So a man never wants to feel like you feel entitled to. To his provision. He wants to feel that it is a gift, that it's something coming from his free will, choice to give to you. That is where he's taking that on voluntarily, without him being forced to by you, controlling him, manipulating him, guilt tripping him, et cetera. So it's a very important piece, how to create that space for a man intentionally. And I remember sometimes with me and Antj's relationship where she would encourage me even to take time for myself. Like, do you need to go on a recharge retreat this weekend? Which is where I would go by myself to spend time thinking about my life in a hotel room or walking out in nature. So it's like a little vacation by myself. We actually don't. I don't feel the need to do that very often anymore. In the beginning of a relationship, I felt the need more often. But. And that may be symbolic of us learning these principles more, where now I don't feel the need to have to pull away. Like, my arm is tired and I have to take a break. So, yes, it's a very important principle. And I'm curious, was there any other lessons you got for yourself, Snuggie, with first dance class? Because I know you talked about this concept of the rigid pattern and being in your head and stiff in your body or not fully connected to your body. What did you notice about that coming up and how that might apply to a woman who is also in a rigid pattern with a man or on a first date with a man where things just feel a little clunky and she's kind of doubting herself or having a hard time being in her body?

Yeah, Such a good question. I think, you know, part of the rigid pattern. And I'm talking about the five developmental stages. Right. And I talk a lot about this with my clients. But when you have like more of a rigid performer pattern, you tend to blame other people, right? Because there's only right and wrong. So the internal dialogue sounds like you're doing this wrong or you're not doing this right, Right. So part of me wanted to say to Brody, like, you're not doing this right? Because I was not doing it right, right. And so, like, but it's easier to project it out, obviously, than to face my own self criticism. And, you know, even like the teacher was saying, you know, just kind of, you know, relax your. Your niece a little bit. So that's very interesting. As he said, Brody can actually move you if you're like, relax a little bit, right. If you're like stiff in your legs and, you know, basically also your hips, it's going to be really hard to maneuver you and to move you. Right. And then I feel even less connected too, because I feel like, it feels like so stiff. And I also felt that I was feeling like I was doing my dance steps and Brody was doing his dance steps. So it wasn't like sort of like this nice symbiosis I will call it yet, right? It was sort of like, okay, and what you never talked about, it's like kind of like going on a first date, right? It's like, okay, well, I'm supposed to say this and you're gonna say that, and you're just kind of sniffing each other out a little bit, right? Kind of feeling each other out a little bit. But it's very much, you know, you're still a little bit like in your head, right? And just making sure you're getting all your steps right. So that was. That was a piece for me too. Was like actually making sure I get these steps right. And I noticed that I was actually starting to get a little bit exhausted. And I think that comes from, like, I was draining myself, right? So when we were running on a coping mechanism, on a protection mechanism, as opposed to being associated to our body and really connected, like, you get drained, you know, because it takes a lot of willpower, right? And also your body's actually more contracted, right. So it also takes, like more strength, right, to move if your body is contracted. So I thought that was just very interesting to observe and then to feel the difference right when I was like, okay, I'm going to go a little bit, relax my knees, let Brody move me around, you know what I mean? And just keep moving, even though I feel like one of us is not doing it right.

Yeah. And the other interesting piece of that is the idea that when you are learning a dance, like you're learning here and with us, learning how to properly be in your feminine, connected to your feminine core, to know that it will be clunky in the beginning, that it takes a while to learn the steps. Like what we're teaching you here in our programs, in our coaching and our courses, is how to reconnect your feminine core. And oftentimes it will feel like you're learning a new dance. You have to learn the basics first. That's what we did today in our first tango lesson that me and Anti took, was we had to learn the basics, the very basics, the proper position, the footwork, basic steps forward and backwards. And then we got some. Some other basic maneuvers that you can do in tango. And that was still very clunky, even for me too. And I have a lot more dance experience than Antja does for ballroom dance. It still took like this. Have to think about it, have to practice it, have to repeat it over and over and over again. So it's like learning a new dance and relationship is also like learning a new language. Being in your feminine, connecting your feminine core is like learning a new language using feminine communication. So it takes a while to get the steps, to get the wording, to get it right in your body. But here's the beauty. Once you've gone through that process, which may take a while, like we have with our 90 day challenge, it may take a while to go through this. But then once you got the steps, you can start to really surrender into your feminine. Like Auntie is going to get there. She's going to get to that point and I am as well, where she will just be able to let go of thinking and to just body follow. Like we'll be able to lead her and we'll just listen and I'll be listening to the music or to how your man in relationship, like he's listening to God or he's connected to his spiritual, spiritual voices like the, the Holy Spirit, whatever he's using as his guidance, he's. It's going through him as well as the music is going through him. And then he's using that to lead the next steps of the relationship, the tempo, the. The movements for his enjoyment and for your enjoyment. And so at some point, he's not even really thinking, but he'll probably be always thinking a little bit more than you, which is why we say the masculine is thinking, the feminine is feeling. And then you'll be able to let go and just follow him and follow the music and enjoy and let go. And that's the most enjoyable part. When you get to that, that tipping point, that special moment, you get into the sweet spot, into the zone as they say in, in athletics, but it's also true in, in art and performance. You'll get in the zone where you can just let go, enjoy and. And flow with the music. And he's leading. He's leading the tempo, and he's enjoying it and you're enjoying it. And that's the important part of polarity as well, is when a man cares about you, when he's feeling a sense of purpose from his masculine. He wants to know that you're enjoying it as well, that you enjoy him, that you appreciate him, you admire him, you are respecting and trusting him to lead, and you're liking what he's putting out. And hey, you don't have to. You don't have to fake it if you're not liking what he's putting out. That's a different conversation. Literally, that's the conversation you need to have with him, which will help you to craft that magnetic feminine communication to share your feelings, let him know what's going on and ask for help respectfully so he can be your knight in shining armor and fix the problem and start to dance and lead better in your relationship together. But then he's going to feel even better after that because he just sometimes needs to know how. He needs to adjust. He's getting feedback. You have this beautiful feedback loop in a dance. He's getting feedback from you. He's watching your body language. He's seeing how his actions are having an impact, what the response is from your feminine. And then he gets to take that information in and adjust to make you happy, to make sure you're doing good. Because when you're doing good, he feels he's doing good, he's doing a good job, he is winning. He is a hero. He has value. That's. That's key to a man, that's critical to a man to feel in his life and especially with you, that's where you provide a purpose for him without needing to tell him what to do or. Or demand it or try to subtly lead him. Because this is another principle that we learned a little bit about today with our dance class is oftentimes there'll be a tendency to want to lead for him or to try to lead him, or to anticipate where he's leading you and then to go ahead. So we had a moment when we were learning in this class where Antia would. She knew the next step, so she started doing it before I even led her to do it. And that's what often happens in a relationship. As a woman Starts anticipating a man's needs, or she starts anticipating his direction or his leadership, and she starts to do it for him without him even asking. And that's actually where you're starting to move into being the leader. It's called back leading in dance. And it's, like, similar to back sleep driving. And so when you are leading for him, that creates a subtle disconnect. And that creates Also a form of. It's actually a form of disrespect in a way. It's saying, like, well, I don't need you to lead. I'll do it myself. I already know where you're going, so I'm going to do it anyways. It's kind of like a mothering dynamic. Now. Antja didn't intend to do that. It's actually because she was practicing the steps, and I wasn't really leading her properly because I was learning the steps, too, to go to the next step. And so she was just doing it on her own. But it's an important piece because as you learn the dance, you start to learn how to not do that. How to actually only do what he's led you to do, essentially, to be listening. That's part. A huge part of principle of ballroom dancing is to listen. Oh, somebody just said, greetings from Argentina. Great to see you, Mech. We just learned. We're talking about Argentine tango that we're learning today. Me and answer are taking a class, but, yes. So to learn and literally listen with your body to your man, what is he? What is his guidance? What does he want to you to do? How is he guiding you? And specifically with his words, with his actions, how is he leading you to listen to that being receptive and open from your feminine core? It's a huge feminine principle. It's the openness. You can only be receptive in that way when you're open and actually listening. So I want to see if you have any. Any thoughts or feelings you want to share on that, Shaggy, that principle of being open and listening and receptive.

Yeah. I mean, you know, that's like, obviously the saying, would you rather be right or would you rather feel, like, loved or have connection? Right? And I think when I was taking over, quote, unquote, for a second, it was like, see, I'm doing it right. Right. But then how I adjusted, like, very quickly is, no, but I want to have. You know what I mean? I want our. I want to honor, like, our polarity, like, our marriage. You know, you are the leader. And so I think it has A lot to do with, like, your mindset and how much you trust your man and how much you respect your man. And it was funny because I was also trying to, like, flirt with Brody, and then he thought that was distracting him and all that. So I was, like, playing with all those, like, different, like, archetypes, too. You know what I mean? I'm like, okay, so now I'm audit performer, and I'm going into the, like, you know, lover, you know, sensual part or whatever. And. But yeah, it was sort of like the second I stepped outside of this, like, okay, I don't care if I'm right or I don't care if I get the steps right first. First or whatever the case may be, right. Like, the. The more it, like, kind of flows, you know. But, yeah, it was really sort of finding, like, the balance between, like, completely relaxing and not doing anything right, Just being, like, okay. Or not anticipating. So. And I think a lot of powerful women are in this dance, like, pun intended, right between, like, okay, I don't want to be completely just, you know, kind of just fall backwards, just be completely passive. But obviously, I also don't want to be, like, penetrating, masculine, planning all the things, right? So that's, like, what we have to give ourselves, like, a little bit of grace, right? Like, that it takes a little bit of time. You know, even our dance teacher was telling us it takes some time. You know what I mean? I mean, our next package is, like, six sessions because that's how long it takes to get to the next level, right? And so I'm like, okay, okay, that makes sense. And. But, yeah, it was really powerful because I feel like the body keeps score. And so we may think, like, oh, we're like, to stop this. Like, I trust them per 1000% on all the levels. Mental, emotional, spiritual, physical. But then you actually see, like, oh, wait a minute, where's my nervous system? Right? And why is that so important? Is because you actually want to authentically connect with your man because he's actually going to feel that if you're authentically connected or if you're actually disassociated and you're running a pattern, like a protection pattern, a coping pattern, performance pattern, and so on.

Yeah, totally. So it was really powerful, and it's a powerful lesson and something that we're huge advocates on. So we're going to keep teaching you those principles because it is the key to having that happy, loving, harmonious relationship that you're looking for with your man is to get into that masculine, feminine, polarized dance that you can enter into with him. That takes some inner work, but it also takes learning some of the basics and principles of feminine polarity and feminine communication that we teach you here. So we're going to start answering some questions now before we get into those again, if you haven't yet, you want to learn the advanced principles and attract the man that you want, the relationship you want with him, take our free quiz highly recommend by clicking the link in the description or comments or in our bio below. And you could also get that by going to our website, magnetize your man dot com. So let's go ahead and start answering some questions here and see what we got for today. So we have Carrie said, good evening. Great to have you here, Carrie. So Carrie also had a question. She said, today I called my boyfriend and he said that there's a pickleball lunch part tomorrow. You are invited if you would like. Oh, party probably tomorrow. You're invited if you'd like to go. My question is, why is he doing this last minute? So he said, there's a guy. Well, for one, I don't know when you called him if he was expecting that. And also if you're chasing him in that way, like, I don't recommend just calling a guy. That's one big piece of this here is like, I don't recommend just calling a guy out of the blue because I consider that to be masculine penetration. It's like you are entering his field. Now, of course, if you're an exclusive relationship or you're married, that's a bit different. Where there's a container where you guys are just both connecting with each other. And usually it's just to handle logistics, hopefully. But what's better, what's the more feminine approach to that is to ask him for what you want or to ask for his time to ask for his availability rather than just claiming it and just saying, I want to talk to you. So you would say, may I ask if we can talk on the phone or are you free? I would love to connect with you. And then he has the ability to say yes. And then you set up a call. Or he would just probably call you right then. And. And that just gives a little bit of a buffer. So you're not entering a space. Because also what can happen is a dynamic where you are chasing him. In a way, you are the one reaching out to him. You are calling him, you are putting yourself into his field when he didn't say yes to that, nor did you ask for that. But you're just there. And that. That shifts the dynamic where now he's in the famine and he's receiving from you, he's being penetrated by you. And so that could be one reason why your dynamic may be where he's not really planning ahead with you. He's just saying, oh, I have pickleball thing tomorrow. Do you want to go? Or. You're welcome to go now. I do like that he's inviting you. That's one thing I did with Antia when we were dating. I. And I was a little bit even less direct than he is. I. I would just tell her sometimes, oh, I'm doing this thing. And she would not really understand that I was my invitation. So she would be a little confused, like, wait, why. Why are you telling me this? Like, and so I wasn't really making direct invites, and it was something I. I learned over time to be better at better communicator myself. But I do like that he is inviting you directly to something. He wants to spend time with you. Now, of course, you would like it to be planned out more in advance, so I would share your feelings with him about that. How. How are you feeling? When he asks you last minute, I would first appreciate him because he is inviting you. That's great. He's asking you to come into his world. He's sort of leading in that sense. Like in the dance, he's inviting you to the next step, so appreciate him for that. And you can also let him know your feelings around that. Just like in a dance, if a man is stepping on your toes or he's not leading you, well, you want to at some point share how that's impacting you and ask for help and ask for may. Ask if you can let me know in a few days in advance next time so that I can plan ahead for that. And he'll probably say, sure, sure, babe, I totally. I can do that for you. And. And then he's. He's feeling good because now he understands that that was an issue for you, where right now he might not even know that that's an issue. So that's a big thing with that. Do you have anything you want to share about that, Snuggie?

Yeah. I mean, sometimes men can be single focused. So if he's more on a masculine scale, masculine to feminine, he's more likely to be single focused. So it could have been that he was literally not thinking about it. I mean, I'm already. I'm sure will sign this and proof of me saying that you Know that he was like, maybe thinking about work and some other things. And then he was like, oh, yeah, I have this, like, pickleball lunch. You know, do you want to come? So he may not be, you know, conscious. You know, we was not conscious about it before, and I think that's why it's so worth to make that request. And then also for you to become clear, why do you need to know that ahead of time? Is it because you're not feeling acknowledged or you're not going to feel cherished? You're not going to feel treasured? Right. Then that leads back to, like, is he treasuring you in other ways? Right. So, I mean, you know, there's a lot of things we don't know about this relationship, of course, but. Or is it just you are actually a planner. You actually authentically plan out a week in advance or, you know, I've sometimes friends who plan a month out in advance. Right. I mean, that literally would tell me. I mean, obviously this month I'm booked, but we can do next month. Right. So that depends also a little bit on your style as well, Carrie.

Yeah, so that's. That's a very good. Great question, Carrie. I hope that was helpful. And let's see, the next question we had here was from Mex. So Mex said, the thing I most like in tango is being a woman in the dance. The woman only must follow having a great partner. It seems like I am a great dancer too. That's totally, totally true. When a man knows how to lead properly and he leads you well, it actually makes you feel like a better partner yourself. You feel like more of a woman. And it feels easy to you. It feels like, wow, I really can just let go. And he seems to really like that. Like, that's a big part of the feminine. At the end of the day, you don't have to do much. Being in the feminine inspires him to take on the role where he's leading, he's providing, he's initiating, he's taking the next step with you, and you really just receive you. So really the biggest gift you can give him from your feminine is being in your feminine. That's it. Like your feminine core, your heart, your feelings. You're following him, respecting him, trusting him, being vulnerable, sharing with him your desires, asking for help when in clarity, when needed. That's really all you have to give to him. You don't have to buy him gifts, you don't have to pay for the meal, you don't have to split the check. You don't have to make him dinner, fix him things, take care of him, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. You following him, that wakes up his masculine. And that's really all he needs at the end of the day. That's what makes him feel purposeful, inspired sense of meaning in his life. And. And you get to feel like, wow, I feel really valuable now. I feel like I'm actually a great partner. I feel like more of a woman, and that feels great. I don't even have to do much. He's also taking on more leadership. He's being even better lead. And so it does depend partially on his skills in his masculine as a man, his leadership skills in your relationship as well as in a dance. So in the dance of your relationships, his experience, his skills, but also your ability to be a great follow that inspires that more inside of him, that he steps up even more. And so you get this powerful upward spiral where now you both start to become even better dancers, as opposed to the downward spiral where you're closed off or you're not following his lead properly or you're disrespectful. And then now he becomes more closed off. He gets frustrated, he's pulling away, or he's fighting with you, arguing with you, and then it's like it goes down and down and down and down. He becomes less loving and caring, and you become even more disrespectful or more masculine with him. And it's. The relationship crumbles as opposed to getting better and better. So that's really important. She said it feels like flying, so, yeah, it's. It's beautiful. So thanks for sharing that mech. And then Kim said, I have been following you as I am just trying to get out there again since my husband passed just over two years ago. And following you is helping me. Yeah, sorry to hear that, Kim. And that's. That's, you know, I can't even imagine what that's like and to lose your husbands. But the great thing about it is you are here. You are getting a fresh start. You are getting reconnected to yourself. You're learning, you're investing in yourself and also setting yourself up for another amazing relationship, another amazing life. The next chapter of your life, you're taking it what was and expanding it into the new. Expanding into your new world, in new life. And so it's a beautiful journey that you're on, and we're glad to have you here. Did you want to share anything with her?

Yeah, I think you Know what I tell women that come to me who have, unfortunately, their loved one past is that, you know, it's like a little bit different because when you date again, it's like the man is actually dating you and your late husband. Right. So he's not. The new man is not replacing your late husband or anything like that. And so there has to be this understanding or clarity, I guess, from that particular man. And then the other piece is to also be aware of how emotionally available you are or not, because you have, like an unconscious loyalty, obviously, towards your late husband. And so when it's only been like two years. Right. There can definitely be a tendency to attract more unavailable men, emotionally unavailable men into your life because in some way you're, you know, you have like a conflict inside of yourself. Right. Where, you know, a part of you is obviously, you know, still deeply in love with your late husband, and the other part, you know, is, you know, looking to move on in some way, shape or form. Right. So just also giving yourself, you know, like, that grace for that transition time.

Yeah, Yeah, I love that. And we had another question here from G.S. she said, has anyone ever felt something deeply spiritual, as if you both speak to each other telepathically, your hearts connect? It feels as if you can feel his emotions deeply. I've never felt those emotions.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah. And what I would say, though, is to be careful, because if you ever. I don't know if you've ever felt that way. It sounds like you're asking if anyone has. If a woman does feel that, where she believes she's totally in touch with her guy, she knows what he's feeling, she's anticipating what he's thinking, etc. You want to be careful about that because it's really hard to know for sure what a man is actually feeling or what he's actually thinking. And in our experience, a lot of women assume that they know what a man is thinking or feeling when they actually don't, but they believe that they do. They say things like, I know him better than he knows himself. Or, I know. I know he loves me because of the way he looks at me. Or I know he. He seems to be pulling away. He seems to be losing interest. Well, we don't always know that for sure. And you want to be very careful about imagining that you are telepathically connected in that way where you just know. Well, you. You got. You don't really know. You can never know for sure what a man is feeling. You can guess. But the best way to know that in, in any real sense is to look at his actions or to listen to his words, but primarily his actions rather than guessing. And oftentimes you can even ask him directly and say, may I ask what you meant by that when you said that? Or may I ask how you're. I, I don't recommend this, typically, to ask him. Never, never ask a man how he feels, but you can ask him how he thinks about something. May I ask how. What you think about what happened yesterday or what, you know, what you think about us. You can even ask that question. I typically don't see a lot of value in asking those questions because a man who is more masculine, he's going to typically show you how he cares about you through his actions rather than through his words. So it's not always helpful to ask a man, like, what he thinks of your relationship together or if he sees there's a future or if he loves you or not. It's better to look at actually what he does and how he behaves to know if he loves you or not. Like, is he helping you? Is he showing care for your heart? Is he checking in with you regularly? Is he leading the relationship? Is he leading you? Is he leading the, Is he moving the relationship forward? Those are often better signals. And so, yeah, I believe it's possible. Some people can feel deeply connected where they just know what the other person is feeling to some extent. But I would be very careful because it's also an easy trap to get caught in of. And it's a masculine trap where you start anticipating his needs. You become like his mommy. Like, oh, I know him, I know what he's feeling. I need to, like, I need to help him. I need to, I need to make him happy. I need, I know what he's struggling with, so I know what he needs. I'm going to give him the perfect advice or the perfect coach, or I'm going to make him dinner at the perfect time and, and please him and make him happy. So a lot of women who are more anxious, they get caught in that as well, of now becoming a people pleaser, of catering to their man because they feel like they're telepathically connected when they're actually just running codependent tendencies. And they're thinking that in order for them to get the love they need, they need to be deeply anticipating his needs because that's actually what they want from him. So I'm curious if you have any other thoughts on that, Snuggie?

Yeah, I mean, I'M definitely, like, curious, like, if that's, like, a codependent question and, like, why you're asking this question? Because I feel like I didn't ask that question, but because I was with the right person. Yeah. I mean, if I was asking myself a question, Brody would literally answer it. Right. But he wouldn't even know that I was asking myself this question. And even to this day, I mean, I'm thinking about, like, maybe a certain person we had talked about, and then the next moment, he's talking about some project of that person. And so I think definitely when you're, like, deeply connected, that you can have that, like, you know, telepathic sort of connection and your hearts connect and all of that. But, yeah, you have to be mindful that also the other parts are aligned, too. Right. Because it sounds like you said, I've never felt these emotions, and. And that tells you that you have not met the right man. And I would say it builds over time. And also, like I said, it's still very grounded because I've seen a lot of women who have, like, tell me to meet each other in their dreams and have, like, all those esoteric experiences and whatever, you know, and then it's like, well, so what's actually happening right now, physically speaking? And they're like, oh, you know, I mean, he's married, and. Yeah, no, we don't live close to each other.

We're like, we've never met in person. Talking online.

I know. I know that he knows. Like, it's exactly what Brody said. And, you know, I want to be so careful with that, because then you're in assumption land. And one thing I just told my women yesterday on our group call is that you we reversing, like, everything where you made an assumption. How can we actually break that down and actually now authentically connect with the man? Right? Because I would still not say, well, I know Brody. Like, you never hear this out of my mouth, because Brody needs have room to reinvent himself. Right? We are the unknown to ourselves. So Brody will also never say. I mean, I don't know if I can't speak for him, actually, so I'm taking that back. But, like, you won't hear that out of my mouth. Right? But what you will hear me say is how I feel or what I'm connecting to right now or what message I receiving right now from the holy spirit for myself. Right? And then I can have a connection with Brody about it or when I was dating, you know, a man right before I met Brody. But it's not like that. I can say, well, I know him, or I already for sure know it is not a narcissist. I for sure already know that he's done xyz. I'm like, really? You know, you're very in dangerous territory that you're deleting, distorting, and generalizing your reality and not even aware of it.

Yeah. And it's very important also, like you said, be the unknown to yourself, but also he is the unknown to you, and that's okay. That's part of what creates the polarity, is the difference between you two, that you don't need to be totally connected all the time and believing all the exact same things and all the perfect alignment and being the exact same type of people. Like, he should be different. He should be a little bit of a mystery to you as you are a bit of a mystery to him that actually creates intrigue and interest between the sexes. Men will always seem mysterious to you to some extent, and women will always seem mysterious to men to some extent. And that's a good thing. And so you don't need to feel that. You don't need to feel fully connected to him. It's actually better in those moments, like Anja said, to reconnect to yourself and ask yourself what you're thinking and what you're feeling about him and then be able to have conversations about that and to engage with him from that place. So that's really important as well. So thanks for asking that. Hope that was helpful. And then Carrie said, I love ballroom dancing. I've been for several years now. I always let the man lead. That's beautiful. And then Mesh said, you should close your eyes and follow even the quiet. So that's. That's a very important principle. That's. That's powerful. That's like taking it to the next level where you surrender to such. To a man to such a degree where you can close your eyes and literally just listen to his leadership and be completely trusting that he's not going to let you bump into somebody else or trip on you or l down that he's got it. That's like him. Even seeing you close your eyes shows that you have. You trust him to such a degree. Most men, most healthy men, if they're not deeply broken, they will take that on as a responsibility. You know, with great. With great power comes great responsibility, and he'll feel, oh, wow, she really trusts me. Like, I don't want to let her down. I want to make sure she enjoys that. Because it's such a gift to him to show that level of trust. Again, if he's not a broken man, a broken man will oftentimes take advantage of that or still screw it up, maybe on purpose, but that's because they're broken. So you got to see what kind of man you're dealing with and see how he handles situations like that, to know that he is a quality man, that he is taking care of your heart, that he is looking out for you. All right, so we're going to take a couple more questions, and we'll wrap it up here. So Jasmine said some people plan the last minute, though not just him or men in general. Yeah, some people do plan the last minute. It's just the way they operate. But most men, when you share your feelings around that and you have a magnetic feminine conversation that will help you to craft with him, he will. He will start to become more of that for you because, again, he'll want to make you happy. He connects more to his masculine core, which is the hero instinct. It's him stepping into his king energy, looking out for his woman, looking out for his kingdom, making sure he's doing a good job. So he will want to adjust on his own to make you happy, to want to be a better leader. And that may involve him learning how to plan ahead a little bit more. Even if he's a more. He used to be a more feminine guy who's like airy, fairy, floaty, schmody, waiting to the last minute to plan anything and spontaneous. That's not really a masculine trait. Masculine energy is about planning, structure, organization, direction. And so he's going to start taking that on more and more as you share your feelings about that. All right. And then Ratna said, I'm feeling uncertain about his feelings towards me. We're in a relationship, but he's been pulling away, and I'm confused. She's confused, ladies and gentlemen. As Tony Robbins like to say, when I ask him about his feelings, he doesn't give me a straight answer. I'm unsure if he truly cares for me or not. He's. So they got cut off here, but she said his mixed signals are leaving me feeling uncertain and anxious. Yeah. So the first thing Ratna, is never ask a man about his feelings. I already said that earlier, so you probably heard that. But never ask a man how he feels. Always ask him about what he thinks. That's the masculine. That's going to put him on his masculine. Because also when you ask a man how he feels he probably doesn't even really know how he feels. He's knowing how he feels through you. You and the feminine, you're like a surrogate heart to him. He gets to connect to himself through you when you are connected to yourself, when you are connected to your heart and your feminine core. So you don't really need to know how he feels. Again, what you look for, what you look towards with your relationship with him is what he thinks, but also what his actions are. Does do his actions show you how he feels? That, that in the basic sense is, is he showing care for your heart over time or is he not showing care for your heart over time? That'll give you the clue. When I say showing care for your heart, that means some of the basics like I said earlier. Is he leading? Is he checking in with you regularly? Is he asking you about how you're doing or how you feel? Is he planning things? Is he initiating things? Is he moving the relationship forward in some way? Is he making sure you're feeling good, you're feeling happy? Is he solving problems for you or not? Especially when you ask for help, what is he doing? That's why our magnetic feminine 90 day challenge is so important and getting coaching with this because you need to see over time how he behaves. Especially when you are connected to your feminine core and you're using what we teach you. Which means you're not asking him how he feels, you're sharing how you feel and letting him handle the problem. Letting him step in from his masculine and take care of you or not. Because if your man is deeply broken, no matter how feminine you are, he's not going to really step up. He's not going to take care of you. He's going to keep putting, making excuses or making it about you making you wrong or ignoring you or arguing with you or changing the subject. But that's why it's so important that you learn and you actually get support with this how to show up properly in your feminine. And so over time you ex, you inspire him into his healthy masculine to take that leadership. And you also get to see what kind of man you're actually dealing with. And so you know and you can continue. If he's showing care for your heart, if he starts to show that and adjust, which he likely will if you use what we teach you and you get that support, or he'll start to become very certain and very sure in his actions that he's not the right man for you because he is broken or he doesn't have any care for you, and he's not stepping into his masculine. And then the other pieces you said here are that he has mixed signals and leaving you feeling uncertain and anxious. I'm curious if you have any, any thoughts on that Shiny.

Well, like I said yesterday to one of my women, is when you feel anxious, is that something from your childhood? Because, you know, yesterday we did. We did some exercises and nothing changed externally. Right. But internally, the woman actually started to feel peaceful, grounded, trust, confident, connected. Right. So, and I think this goes back to what we were just talking about. When in a dance, you're just like whole. They just put your whole weight on a man and you're not actually seeing. Oh, nobody can make you feel anything right now. Right. Like, you know, because you spotted you got it. So if you, you know, as something inside of yourself. And why is that? Why can this be triggered? And you know, what we of course found out last night, for example, is of course, childhood wounds were there and we were able to actually address it. You know, actually on a somatic level, do a lot of somatic work for my women too. And it is a whole different shift in the woman. And it didn't matter if the man was, you know, responding to her or not. And even today she said she feels like a truly no person. Right. So I definitely encourage you to also see, you know, is this something that's not just about this man, but this is actually something that's decades old. Right. And you know, the body keeps score.

Yeah, totally. And I'm gonna answer quick question and then we'll wrap it up from Instagram because we didn't. For some reason, the Instagram comments aren't showing up. But I do got one here. It says it's from Nicole. It says it is strange that someone used to walk out when we were dating, but then after he friend zoned me, he doesn't walk out anymore. I'm kind of offended. And gave him. Gave him some pain in the butt kind of energy. So, yeah. So basically, Nicole, what that means oftentimes when a man is walking out when you're dating. So I, I would assume you mean he's pulling away when you're dating, but then after you became friends, he's like, engaging with you more. Now this may be because he, for one, he may be an avoidant attachment style. And he's much more comfortable when there's not a lot of commitment, there's not a lot of intimacy emotionally. In other ways. It also could mean that your behavior changed when you were Dating versus when your friends. Maybe you became feminine, actually, maybe you detached from the outcome, which is likely what happened when you realized you weren't going to be. You're not actually dating. You started to treat him more as just another person. You were less maybe anxious or needy or putting demands on him or trying to control him or trying to change him. And so when a man feels free in that sense, oftentimes that's what's going to happen. He's going to come closer to you when he feels like you're not trying to change him, you're not trying to control him in any way, you're not trying to cling on to him, but you're simply showing up, you're being vulnerable, you're being open, you're in your feminine core. You're appreciative, you're respectful, you're vulnerable. And he is free to do whatever he is because you're detached from the outcome. Now a man will feel that, and he now takes on that leadership himself. He wants to come closer to you. He wants to help because he is free. He's not feeling like you're trying to, you know, change him, mold him, treat him like a little baby, or make him give you everything that you desire. You simply open your heart and it's like the flower that attracts the honeybees to. To the flower, rather than like the hunter, the huntress that's going out in the woods and trying to like, pin him down and trying to catch him with your nets. It's a much different energy. So that could be what may be happening with that as well. Nicole, and see if there's any final thoughts or questions here, because there were some good ones that came up. Jasmine said men aren't as emotional as women. Yeah, they're not as connected their emotions, especially the more masculine a man is. He's going to act regardless of how he feels, and you're going to become the emotional vessel for him, actually. And so it's very important. And she also said femininity is a huge turn on for men, which is very true. So awesome. Hope this was helpful for you today. You got some value. Remember the dance. Remember the masculine feminine polarity. And if you want to take this to the next level, get our advanced principles, our advanced coaching and training and personalize it for your specific situation. Again, I would highly recommend taking our free magnetize your man quiz to get the relationship you want with your man. Make him desire you, make him obsess over you by clicking the link in the description or comments below this video. Or you can go to our bio or our website magnetizeyourman.com to pick that up now as well. So much love. Take care, keep on the journey and we look forward to talking to you again in our other trainings coming up later on. Bye bye. Much love. Talk to you later.