When a Man IGNORES You, here's what he's thinking (counterintuitive)

When a man ignores you, here's what he's thinking. Hey, everybody, I am Kevin Anthony for Magnetize youe Man. And I am a certified sexologist, NLP practitioner and sex love and relationship coach. And for over a decade, I have been helping men, women and couples have the relationship of their dreams and the best sex of their lives. Okay, the number five thing that he is thinking when he's ignoring you is, I'm not ignoring you. One thing that I tend to see fairly regularly is a woman will ask me, I don't understand, I don't know what's going on. I don't know what to do. He's ignoring me. He hasn't texted me or called me or said anything. And I go, okay, well, let's see, how long has it been? And she's like, well, it's been two days. I'm like, okay, well how frequently do you normally communicate? Well, you know, I mean, sometimes when he's working or he's got his kids or whatever, and it's like, okay, okay, we need to just slow down a little bit here. So there's often a difference in how men perceive time versus the way women perceive time. So there are a lot of times where a woman will feel like a man is actually ignoring her or, you know, intentionally waiting a certain, certain amount of time before he responds, when in reality he's just over there going, oh, wait, it's been two days already. I didn't even realize it. Right. And so he wasn't consciously or intentionally doing that. It just, that's how it was perceived on the other end. And so I often have to, you know, guide the ladies and say, okay, well, what are the usual communication patterns? And does this fall within those usual communication patterns or does this fall outside that? In other words, if you talk every single day for, you know, however long, and then suddenly he hasn't talked to you in five days, that's a noticeable shift in pattern. And that would indicate that maybe he is ignoring you. But if it's normal to talk every couple of days, maybe you Normally talk every 2ish or so, but it's been three days doesn't necessarily mean that he is ignoring you. And that brings me to number four, which is that he's under a lot of stress and feeling overwhelmed. This one I see a lot. I see this a lot. I will often hear women saying, well, he's been ignoring me and he's not getting back to me and he's not returning my texts. And then of course I want to Dive into that a little bit. I want to ask some more questions. You know, what's going on. Tell me a little something about your relationship. Is this normal? Often what will come out as we talk through that is that, you know, he's working a lot of hours at his job. He's a single parent on top of that, with, you know, trying to take care of kids, or, you know, maybe he's got parents he's caring for, or, you know, he's going through a stressful divorce. Whatever it is, there are often things that are just keeping him, one, physically busy and two, in a very stressed state where when he does have downtime, he really just needs that downtime. So, you know, if that's the case, you really just need to have a conversation about that, and you need to just talk about it and be really open and clear. So one thing that you can do from your end is to express your needs to him. And like, hey, I know that things are really stressful. I know that sometimes you just can't handle one more thing that you're doing. But it would be really great and really helpful if you could just send me a couple of word text, like, thinking of you, right? So you can share what your needs are and try to help him with that. And you also can be a little understanding that, you know, he's probably in a very stressful situation and that he's got other things on his mind that are distracting him. But it doesn't necessarily mean that he's intentionally avoiding you or ignoring you. Okay. The number three thing that he is thinking is it's entirely possible that he doesn't know how to express his feelings. And so sometimes when men have difficulty expressing their feelings, they just don't express them at all. Now, this could be positive feelings. It could also potentially be negative feelings. So sometimes, you know, he might be feeling, in a sense, positive feeling such that, like, I've never really felt this way with a woman before. And because he's never felt that way, he may not necessarily understand what it is. And so sometimes it's just like, I don't really know what's going on here, and I need to give myself a little space and time to sort of figure it out before I, you know, reengage. Other times, it might be that there's something in the relationship that's potentially not working for him and he doesn't know how to express that. Now, I would love to say that you are all in relationships with highly evolved men who know how to communicate really well. And who would tell you, hey, here's what's going on for me. You know, there are some things in the relationship that I'm not sure if they really line up. I'm trying to figure out if I really want to be in this relationship or how maybe how we can work through whatever is going on. But the reality is, for most men, that just doesn't happen. And so they'll tend to pull back and they'll tend to create more space because they just don't know how to express what it is they want to express. Now, sometimes it might be that they don't even really know what it is that they're feeling. And so they need some time and space to try to sort of figure that out, because they can't express to you something that they don't actually know themselves. So that's something that could potentially be going on also. But just know that sometimes if it seems like he's creating too much space, it could potentially be because he doesn't know how to express whatever it is is going on for him. All right, that brings me to number two, and it is one that I often have to say when I am working with women, and I always hate saying it, but it is a reality. So therefore, we got to talk about it. And that is, if he's ignoring you, there is a strong possibility that there is another woman, or at least another possible woman. One thing that I tend to see out there in the dating world a lot is both men and women often have multiple people that they're sort of communicating with or dating or going out on dates with and trying to kind of narrow it down and figure out which one is going to be which. Right? And so you might go out on a date or two with a guy, and then suddenly you're not hearing back from him, and you're like, what's going on? It could be that he sees maybe more potential in one of these other possibilities, and he's putting his energy, attention, and focus over there. One of the ways that you know that that's true is often he'll disappear for a while, right? And then he'll be back again. And you're like, what? I don't get it. Why is he suddenly back now? And the reality is, is he figured out that that other one wasn't the right one or didn't go well, or whatever happened. And so he's not putting any energy over there anymore. And now he's back over here going, okay, well, let's. Let's pursue this One. So that is a possibility. It's something to keep in mind if, you know, you're finding, especially if you were having what seemed like really good connection, and then suddenly he's like, he just disappeared. Always a possibility that there is somebody else. All right? And the number one thing that he is thinking when he ignores you is it is entirely possible that he is indeed actually mad at you for something, and therefore he is intentionally just ignoring you for whatever reason. Now, like I said before, when he had a feeling that he didn't know how to express, it would be great if, you know, that were the case, he could just come out and say it. So with this one, it's the same thing. If he were indeed mad at you for something, you would think that he would be able to just voice it. However, if everybody could just clearly and compassionately communicate all the things that they needed to communicate, we wouldn't really have many, if any, problems at all in this world. We certainly wouldn't have any sitcom TV shows, because the basis of every single one of those is somebody's not communicating something. You know, it's like if you had just said it, there'd be no episode, right? So that's. That's often the case here. So it might be that he is actually upset with you about something that happened in the relationship or during the dating process, and he's just going to need some space. Please make sure that you take our free polarity quiz@polarityquiz.com and if you're looking for more of my work, you can go to my website at kevananthonycoaching.com forward/linkinbio. That's where you can find links to all of the different things, including my coaching programs and my YouTube channel and my podcast and everything else.