Mike DomitrzPresident, Author, and Speaker on Respect, The Center for Respect, Inc. · Author & Speaker on Respect for Schools, Corporations, & the Military since 1990 (has reached

A simple way to intervene.

25 Jul 2024 · 1 min

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In this instructional segment, the speaker outlines a military-inspired bystander intervention framework consisting of three actions—Direct, Distract, and Delegate—all beginning with the letter D. He notes that Direct confrontation is often the most intimidating for most people. To reduce confrontational pressure, he suggests leveraging group solidarity: gather a few friends, have them back you up, and together approach the individual (Jesse) to calmly inform them that a mutual friend (Aaron) appears intoxicated and needs a safe ride home. The approach emphasizes non‑aggressive communication, collective support, and ensuring the safety of the intoxicated person.

Chapters

So how do you intervene? So what are ways in the military you're taught to intervene? You get a lot of training on intervention. What do they teach you? Yep. All right. Direct. Call it out. And then we had another one over here. Distract. And there's one more word there. They all start with the letter D. Delegate. Delegate. Right? So those are the 3 things you've been taught. What's the most intimidating of those 3 choices? Direct. Absolutely. It's usually direct for most people. They feel uncomfortable with it. All right? So the question is, how can you do this in a way that doesn't feel confrontational? Well, here's the deal about Marines. You stick together, right? So if you're at a party or a club, you're together. So just walk up to 3 or 4 friends and be like, hey, can you back me up? Instantly your friends are like, let's go. Right? So now there's 4 or 5 of you. You calmly walk up to Jesse and simply say, hey Jesse, clearly Aaron's had a lot to drink. Hope you don't mind. We just wanna make sure Aaron has a safe ride home.