Mike DomitrzPresident, Author, and Speaker on Respect, The Center for Respect, Inc. · Author & Speaker on Respect for Schools, Corporations, & the Military since 1990 (has reached

Being truthful. #centerforrespect #mikedomitrz #kindness #honesty #respect #boundariesmatter

14 Dec 2024 · 1 min

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In this short instructional clip, relationship coach Mike Domitrz challenges the common belief that “being kind” means sparing someone’s feelings by continuing to date them when there is no mutual interest. He explains that many people mistake kindness for respect, and that taking a person on dates they don’t want to be with actually raises the other person’s hopes, deepens emotional investment, and can be emotionally cruel. Domitrz argues that the truly respectful—and therefore kind—approach is to communicate honestly and directly, stating a lack of interest rather than offering false hope. The segment emphasizes the importance of clear boundaries, truthful communication, and distinguishing genuine respect from superficial kindness in romantic interactions.

Chapters

Let's say that somebody really likes you and you don't like them back. What a lot of people do is they think, what's the kind thing to do? They do not say, what is the respectful thing to do? When they say, what is the kind thing to do? They'll often actually do something that's disrespectful that seems easier but isn't really kind. So let me give you an example. They'll think, well, I'll go on a date or two with them just to not make them feel bad. Now, what's happening when you're going on a date with somebody who really wants to date you is they're thinking, You wanna date them. Why else are you going on this date? So you're actually raising their hopes. Their emotions are getting more invested in you when you are not invested at all. It's actually sort of cruel to do that to somebody, but in somebody's mind, they'll go, well, that'll be kind. Yeah, but is it respectful? You're playing with someone's emotions. So the respectful thing to do would be to answer honestly.