Mike DomitrzPresident, Author, and Speaker on Respect, The Center for Respect, Inc. · Author & Speaker on Respect for Schools, Corporations, & the Military since 1990 (has reached

Call out the crime and take action.

14 Dec 2023 · 1 min

Watch on YouTube

1:00

In this segment, the speaker argues that sexual assault and rape are rarely labeled as such in social settings like parties or bars, with people instead using victim‑blaming phrases such as “she was asking for it,” “taking advantage,” or “drunk hookup.” Because the crime isn’t named, bystanders feel no responsibility to intervene. The speaker proposes a simple intervention: explicitly call out the behavior (e.g., “I think Jesse is setting up Erin to be raped”) to force others to recognize the situation and feel compelled to act. The core message is that naming the crime removes ambiguity and creates accountability, which is essential for preventing sexual violence.

Chapters

Because nobody at the party is calling the crime what it is. You'll never hear the words sexual assault or rape at a party or a bar. What words would you hear instead to describe this scene? She was asking for it. All right, victim-blaming statements, right? Like, they're asking for it. How— what other ones? How about this? Taking advantage. Oh, they're just taking advantage of the situation. Drunk hookup. We hear that one used a lot when they're describing a sexual assault. So nobody intervenes because nobody's calling it what it was. But imagine if you actually were at the party, went up to somebody and said, hey, I'm not sure, I'm not positive, but I think Jesse is setting up Erin to be raped or sexually assaulted. Now, if you said those words, most people are gonna be like, what? Where? Because when you call it what it is, no one can deny their responsibility to do something. One of the problems in our world right now is nobody's calling the crime what it is when it's being set up right in front of them. Thank you.