Mike DomitrzPresident, Author, and Speaker on Respect, The Center for Respect, Inc. · Author & Speaker on Respect for Schools, Corporations, & the Military since 1990 (has reached

Consent is clear, mutual, and in the moment.

27 Jun 2025 · 1 min

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In this instructional video, speaker Mike Domitrz explains the essential elements of sexual consent. He emphasizes that consent must be mutually wanted and specific—agreeing to one act (e.g., a kiss) does not grant permission for other acts. Consent must be given in the moment; prior agreements made earlier (e.g., “let’s hook up at 1 AM”) are not valid consent at the later time. Consent is freely revocable: the moment a partner says “stop,” the activity must cease. The speaker illustrates predatory language (“I can’t control myself”) and urges listeners to recognize and call out such behavior, reinforcing that it is not acceptable.

Chapters

Consent is mutually wanted. Nobody's talking somebody into anything. They both want it. It's specific. So if you say, can I kiss you? And they say yes, you don't get to do other things. That's not what they agreed to. It's in the moment, which means if you say, hey, tonight when we come back from party like 1 AM, you want to hook up? And they say yes, that's not consent. That's called making plans. Consent must occur at 1 AM when you're back together. This is why it must be in the moment. Free to be removed means the second someone says stop, you must— Stop! If your partner says, but I can't control myself, By the way, do people talk like that sometimes? Yes or no? Yes! Sounds like a predator. How many agree that is what that sounds like? Yes! Yes! So if somebody ever says that to you, look them in the eyes and go, not my problem. It's not, right? Call that stuff out.