Mike DomitrzPresident, Author, and Speaker on Respect, The Center for Respect, Inc. · Author & Speaker on Respect for Schools, Corporations, & the Military since 1990 (has reached

Demanding intimacy instead of requesting it removes choice entirely.

16 Mar 2026 · 1 min

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In this segment, the speaker distinguishes between a demand and a request in sexual contexts, emphasizing that a demand carries an entitlement claim—"you owe me"—whereas a request does not. The speaker asserts unequivocally that no one ever owes another person sexual images, videos, texts, or activity, regardless of popularity or relationship status. By framing the issue as a fundamental question of consent, the talk underscores that demanding intimacy removes choice and is inherently non‑consensual, while a request respects autonomy. The speaker uses direct rhetorical questions and a stark "yes/no" format to drive home the point that any demand for sexual content is unacceptable.

Chapters

Some of you will try to show confidence. You'll do one of these. Hey, give me a kiss. Whoa. By the way, does that stuff happen? Yes or no? Yes. Do people do that with other sexual acts? Yes, some people do. Is it okay? No. All right, so it's clearly not a request. What is it? It's a demand. Now, what's the difference in a demand and a request? Here's the difference. A demand implies one thing and one thing only. You owe me. That's what a demand says. You owe me. I can't tell you to give me $5. You don't owe me. So if I'm demanding, it means you owe me. So this might be one of the most important questions we discuss this entire evening. Do you ever owe anyone anything sexual? Images, video, text, sexual activity. Do you ever owe it? Yes or no? No. Never. You never owe it. I don't care how popular they are. You don't owe it. This is so important.