The speaker argues that fear of rejection is not a real excuse to skip asking for consent. He says people who truly feared rejection would avoid sex entirely, and that most people adjust rather than stop when told no, proving they're not actually afraid.
Here's another reason people don't ask: fear of rejection. Whatever you do, do not give them a choice. If what I just said sounds awful, because that's exactly what you're saying if you say, I'm not going to ask because they might say no. So you're just not going to give them a choice. That's awful. That's literally cruel. I can't handle you saying no, so I'm not giving you a choice. Now, people get defensive with me and go, that's not fair, Mike. They have a choice. They have a choice whether to push me away. Should they have to defend their body in a sexual situation? No. No, they should not. So we're not even afraid of rejection. I can prove you're not afraid of rejection. When most people hear no during intimacy, do they flat out stop everything, or do they try another way to get back to where they were? Clearly not afraid of rejection. And if you were afraid of rejection, you'd never be sexually intimate with another human being, because rejection is always on the table. It's a possibility.
