Mike DomitrzPresident, Author, and Speaker on Respect, The Center for Respect, Inc. · Author & Speaker on Respect for Schools, Corporations, & the Military since 1990 (has reached

Kindness being honest with respect. #centerforrespect #mikedomitrz #respect #boundaries #kind

4 Dec 2024 · 1 min

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In this brief instructional monologue, the speaker addresses a common social dilemma: how to respond when someone expresses romantic interest but the feeling isn’t mutual. The speaker critiques the well‑intentioned but misleading approach of offering dates merely to spare the other person’s feelings, labeling it as unkind. Instead, they propose a respectful, honest response that follows a three‑step structure: (1) thank the person for their openness, (2) clearly state the lack of attraction or connection, and (3) close with gratitude again. This method simultaneously conveys appreciation, maintains honesty, and sets clear personal boundaries without leading the other person on.

Chapters

Somebody really likes you and you don't like them back. What a lot of people do is they think, what's the kind thing to do? They do not say, what is the respectful thing to do? Well, I'll go on a date or 2 with them just to not make them feel bad. They're thinking, you want a date? You're playing with someone's emotions. So the respectful thing to do would be to answer honestly. Oh, thank you so much for letting me know you're interested in me. That's so wonderful to hear. I'm not feeling that attraction, that connection, and so I don't want to mislead you in any way, but thank you so much. Now look at how I just did that, right? I started by thanking the person. I ended by thanking the person, and in the middle I was completely honest and respectful, and it allowed me to establish boundaries at the same time.