After asking for consent, you have to actually respect the answer. A common pattern, especially among teenagers, is pushing back with "why not?" when someone says no, which teaches people from a young age to question refusals instead of accepting them.
So step number three, you're going to ask the question, right? And then last one is if you're going to ask a question, you're going to respect the the answer. Are we good at this? If somebody says not tonight, does this person normally do like we said earlier? Okay, glad I asked. No, in fact, what one or two words will a sexual partner ask you if you say no to sex? One or two words are going to ask you when you say no. What are the words? Why not? Now here's what's fascinating. Middle schoolers yell the same answer. If this was full of 300 middle school students, they yell, why not? If this was full of 300 high school students, they yell, why? Or, why not? That's how common this is. Kids at a young age learn, and they become adults and learn the same message. What's the message? If you say no to a partner sexually, your answer will not be respected. It will be challenged and questioned, and you should expect that. That's sad, right? The idea that it will be challenged and questioned versus accepted.
