Teenagers often say yes when they mean no because they fear disappointing others or believe refusing is mean. They're seeking acceptance and affection, not because they want the activity itself. Learning to say no without guilt is about understanding that protecting your own needs isn't unkind.
Why? What do you think is the number one reason teens who want to say no are still saying yes? Peer pressure. That's one of the reasons, not the number one. She wants to feel wanted. We're very close. She doesn't want to disappoint the partner. It's actually not— she's not saying yes to feel wanted. She's saying yes to not hurt their feelings. She's been taught to keep him happy. Where do you think I'm getting that answer from? What's it? Yeah. So this is overwhelming students' answers. She wants to be loved. Right, and they're saying, I don't want to disappoint her, I don't want to be mean. They think saying no is mean. Now, that doesn't mean there aren't some who think, I'm going to do this because I want to feel loved. Yeah, but actually they're not the ones thinking, I want to say no. They're the ones thinking, I want to say yes to get loved. There's a difference there.
