Talking FEAR with "Mike & Sam" Show

You're—

you— Alrighty, here we go. Episode 3. Episode 3.

I know, I just can't believe we've actually lasted this long. We haven't been booted off the air. It's unbelievable.

Exactly. And that airway is the Mike and Sam Show. We are so excited to have you all here. I'm Mike.

And I'm Sam.

And today we are talking about elimination, right?

Yeah, exactly.

And of course they can see our names, so it's like we need to keep it—

Oh, that's right, it's above our head.

I forgot that. But if you're watching this, we would love to have you comment as we dive into the conversation we're about to dive into. And you comment right down there, right below us. Uh, if you don't see your name appearing when we highlight it, there's a link I've included above here that you can click that allows us to see your name when we share, because we can share your comments and discuss them. And that gives us even more of a discussion to have. And we really, really love that. And we appreciate that. So please comment below. Let's get into today's discussion. It's, it's actually a quote that we want to share. So I'm going to read this quote. This quote is from Audre Lorde, Audre Lorde. And here's the quote. When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important Whether I am afraid, and Sam, during times like now, for many of us, many in our industry could be ourselves also. Sam, there's fear, right? We're all experiencing that a little bit, and this quote becomes very important. Now remember, if you're watching, you can share your thoughts about that quote again. I'm going to read it just one more time so we can really dive into it. When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important. Whether I'm afraid. Audrey, Lori. Sam, I'm gonna let you start on this one.

Yeah, you know, there's several things that just flood into my mind. One of those is, I was doing a program for a large group one time, and they had— I'd broken them up into some small exercises. These 2 women had worked together. When I came back, I said, what did you experience? And the one woman said, I discovered that we have the same fears. And it was such a powerful moment because Here it was, she was with someone that was a total stranger to her before this point in time, and they realized they have the same fears. We're not alone, that everyone around us is probably thinking the same thing, worried about the same thing. We all have the same concerns, but we can address them, and especially if we come together. That's the first thing that jumps into my head.

Yeah, and there's a couple things that jumped into my head on that, and that is that when we're in fear, It doesn't feel good.

Mm-mm.

And it is not a place to where we feel we are in a place of strength. It is a place of weakness. And so I think what I love about that quote is that when I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, that redirects us, right? That now says, oh, fear's clouding everything, but wait, there's a vision through there. I can open up and there's a vision there. If I can get to the vision, Exactly.

That's it. Because so, there's several things here. What do you focus on? Are you focused on your fear? Are you focused on the vision? If you focus on the fear, then you get bogged down into that. If you focus on the vision, then all of a sudden, our minds turn on to, how do I solve this? How do I make it happen? How do I create this? But the word in there that really captured me, Mike, you had me at service. You had me at service because that's what it's all about. It's about the service of others. And I know that you believe this as I do, that when we're serving other people, then the fear goes away, or it may be there, but we find a way to work through it because the service of others is something that's bigger than ourselves.

Absolutely. Last night, we have a parent group, you know this, called the Mutually Amazing Parents on Facebook, and I was interviewing Jason Hewlett, and this idea came up of servicing others.

Yep.

What's that?

I said love Jason.

Yeah, Jason's amazing. And while we were talking, the one thing we talked about plays in here, and that is servicing others in the best way you can. I think a lot of times right now people feel pressure that they have to serve the way everybody else is. We get into comparison mode, especially when we're afraid. Oh my gosh, they're doing all of this, I'm not doing that much. Or, oh, they're doing all this, I'm not doing that much. What can you do? What are— maybe it's a small little thing a day that allows you to serve for others. The reason we started this show, because we wanted to come together and do something that we could give back to others, right? So, what little things can you do with little steps, right? It starts with episode 1 and maybe nobody's watching by tomorrow, but we took that step and we tried it. You try it.

And it doesn't matter what other people do. We have to stop looking at what other people are doing and do what we know is right, what aligns with our purpose, what aligns with our values. And when we do that, Then we are going to take action that is appropriate for us and that is all that matters.

Yeah, and I think that is so important. It is so tough to not compare, especially in a time of fear, because what we do is we think, all right, I am hurting. How are others doing? And if we even think at all they are doing better, we start to go, oh, no. Oh, no. I am not living up to or something. I failed, right? All that language comes in.

You know, Recently, I read a couple of stories that really sunk home with me. It was about a gentleman that's working behind the counter, a cashier at a grocery store in the UK, and someone was using their credit card and it wouldn't go through. And he tried again and it wouldn't go through. And it was an elderly gentleman. And finally, the young man behind the cashier, he just used his own credit card behind the scene and it appeared as if the credit card from the elderly gentleman went through. So this guy basically just paid for these groceries and it wasn't all that expensive. It was $25 or something, but he made a huge difference. Then I read another story about a grad from college that several years later went back and basically wiped out the debt for all the graduating seniors. An amazing thing, wiping out the debt for all the graduating seniors. Okay, they're both serving. They're both serving on different levels, but they're appropriate levels for their level Their ability to serve, and that's all that matters. And that's what you're saying, do what you can do.

Yeah, yeah. And even ask yourself, what would I enjoy doing? I think that's something people forget. They think, what do I have to do? Well, what do you enjoy doing? There might be some things you enjoy. Somebody last night put, I love humor, I'm good at humor. All right, how are ways you can make people laugh? Go on to Facebook Live and make people laugh tonight. People need to laugh, right? So absolutely. What is your gift? And that gets back to the quote about when we focus on the vision. And I think in the word vision, we can also talk about our purpose and our gifts. And that's a whole nother episode that we could go in. It's a hot topic for you. I know that.

We'll come back and do that another time. I think I want to circle back though, Mike. We have to connect back to the main word, which was fear. And that is that in It's critical to look past the fear. Accept the fact that we all have fears. We all have concerns. Some people that look so confident, they have fears too. And just knowing that hopefully empowers someone to push through.

Yeah, I think it's so important. I know people are like, oh, I'm going into this conversation. I'm really nervous about it. And you'll be like, well, the other person probably is too. They're like, you know, we forget that, right? That it's Exactly.

We're so— But when you take the focus off yourself and you put the focus on them, then all of a sudden, that fear goes away. It's kind of like, you know, before we step onto the platform, we could be speaking in front of 50 people or 5,000 people. And, you know, I get nervous. And I get nervous when I'm thinking about myself. When I turn my focus to what is it that I'm here to give to everyone in the audience, the nerves go away. It just Because now it becomes about serving them. And I think that's why this quote is so powerful because it lays out the steps for all of us to move past our fear.

Yeah, I love it too. And I love the idea of what you're just saying there, that you become more empowered when you leave the vision of fear, right? You become more empowered when you focus in on that vision. And so, in a moment of fear, we tend to say, yeah, but. And what I'd like everybody out there to do is say, yeah, and I'm afraid, and here's what I'm going to do to move forward. Here's a way I'm going to contribute, and here's a way I'm going to serve. And afraid and versus afraid, but yeah.

Hey, listen, Mike, before we get off, I do want to remind everyone, if you're enjoying these livecasts, go to our YouTube pages, Mike Domitrz and Sam Silverstein. There's 2 separate pages, and wherever you're looking, be sure and subscribe to the other one because we both are constantly putting new content up. Not only subscribe, click the bell so you'll get a notice when we have something new up. We're always working really hard to share powerful thoughts and ideas.

Yeah, you know, our show yesterday, second episode, the whole show was based on a comment one of you left on episode 1.

We want those comments.

We love that. So even if you're watching this later, leave a comment and it could become a future episode for us. Just a question or a comment. can make a huge difference. So whether you're watching it live or not, and by the way, Sam's easy, YouTube, Sam Silverstein, right? youtube.com/SamSilverstein. For me, it's youtube.com/CenterForRespect, right? So that's all you have to do to find us. We love that you've been with us. Have an awesome day. Sam, I'll let you take it out.

Hey, we'll see you tomorrow at 1 o'clock Central Time. Everyone stay well, move through your fears, and have a great afternoon.