Teamwork and when it goes wrong

Hello, everybody. Welcome to Mike and Sam. Hello, Sam. How are you today?

I'm great, Michael. How are you?

I, well, you know, I am fantastic because we launched our course this week. We have a full course. It has been just so much fun to do. And so, I'm loving life.

I, I, I can understand that completely. I'm, I'm a few weeks behind you, but our course is coming. We're working on it ferociously. So, it's exciting to be able to work with people and take our messages deeper and help them in their lives, in their organizations, in their community, make a significant difference.

Yeah. And you know what's neat is we both were surrounded with people who helped us build these courses, people we learned from, people we gained insights from, each other. We were, we have been, we always have been a great team for each other in helping go on this journey. And—

Oh, I know where you're going with this.

Yeah. You know me and my smooth transitions. So teamwork, but teamwork doesn't always go so well. Teamwork can go bad. And you, this was your idea, Sam. You're like, hey, let's talk about when teamwork goes bad. So Sam, take us there.

Well, I just, you know, when I was thinking about it this morning, I was actually thinking about just this, is these courses that we've developed for our communities and the people around us, as you mentioned, and the teams that we're a part of. And sometimes teams work great together, and then sometimes they don't. And I've seen a lot lot of organizations where the leader brings someone in and says, you know, help our teams work better or make our teams work better. Or the leader walks into a room and there's 6 people sitting in there. And the leader goes, you guys need to learn to work better as a team. And then turns around, slams the door, and walks out. And I'm like, that ain't gonna happen in that scenario. That's exactly why they're— why the teamwork is not flourishing is because first of all, the teamwork is not being modeled by the leader. Leader has to model what great teamwork is if the teams around that leader are going to operate within an environment of great teamwork.

Yeah, you have to be the person you want them to be, right? You and I are both learning from a person named Stu McLaren about courses, right? Stu's got some brilliant stuff. And Stu says—

Stu McLaren?

Yeah. And Stu teaches, be the student. You and I were talking about this earlier today. Be the student. Well, it's the same for a leader. You have to be the person you want them to be, right? You can't just come in and dump everything and go, now you be this great person who I'm not, right? Says— because then they're gonna look at you going, why would I listen to you then? You don't have credibility even because you haven't even figured it out, right? You and I always say before we hire someone, what's their track record? Well, if you have a track record of a leader of not doing what you're asking me to do, I'm probably not listening to you. when it comes to living my life that way or leading that way in the company?

Yeah. So, first of all, one of the reasons why teamwork is not working in an organization is it's not working from the chief team leader, the CEO, the leader of the organization. Everything, you know me, I always say everything starts and stops with leadership. Everything rises on leadership. If the leader's not If the leader's not clicking, then no one else is going to be clicking. So, the leader has to set that example. And what that example means is, are you trying to manipulate people to do something for you? Or are you there to serve the people and help them be successful? So, if you're a team leader, if you're leading a team, one of the reasons why a team might not be functioning the way you want it to, it could be as bad as dysfunctional, is because You are looking for the team to accomplish something for you. First of all, as the team leader, you need to understand how can you serve everyone on the team to help them be successful. Because if all of your team members are successful, then what happens is the team is successful and then you are by default.

Oh, absolutely. And you know, I can remember when I was younger, I coached. I was a high school coach and did some club coaching. And I can remember myself as a younger coach. There were a lot of things I did well, but the one thing when I look back on that I struggled with at times were people who did not jump in with the team atmosphere, with the team experience. And I struggled with that. And what I need, looking back, I could, I can ask myself, and I have, what could I have done differently to, to connect with that individual, to help them understand? Now, I at the time thought I did, but I do wonder, hmm, could I have done more? There are times where it's just not a match. But there are times where we could have done more. And so we all have to look in the mirror as leaders and say, hey, instead of thinking this situation, this person is a challenge, how about looking at, well, what could I do so it's not a challenge? What could I do to make this more supportive for this person?

Well, and a lot of times, people on teams are, if there's a disruptive member, it can be traced back to they're not getting the information they need to be able to make the decision they need to be able to make. And so, Some people need to know what. Some people need to know why. Some people need to know how. What are we supposed to be doing? Why are we doing it? How are we supposed to go about doing it? And if you're a what person, you need the what, and that's all you need to go. If you're a why person, you need the why. If you're a how person, you need the how. If you're a why person, you get the what and the why, but you don't get the how. And you're a how person, then you're dead in the water. Now, there's some people, and we call those troublemakers, But they're really what, why, how people. And what happens is they need the what, the why, and the how. And without all that information, they're bogged down. As a team leader, it's our responsibility to make sure that we're proactively communicating that information to the members of the team so that they can thrive. If they have to come to us and ask us for that information, then it almost looks like we're holding back, Mike. And it looks like we're, we're trying to hide something.

Yeah. And in that process, we got to watch for toxicity. Now, what I'm referring to there is you could be a great leader giving them all 3 elements they need, and somebody's over here trying to give different versions of those 3 things, causing trouble. And as a leader, you have to address that. You cannot think as a leader, well, you know what, they're just them. They're going to do what they do. No, because now that leaves everybody getting 2 different messages. Yours, which is clear, which is succinct, and this toxic one over here, maybe. So you've got to cut out the toxicity so that everybody's getting the consistency.

Well, and where I'm, you know where I'm going to go now. As soon as you bring that up, the question I'm bringing up is what are the values of the organization? Because if we're allowing someone to stay in an organization that's toxic, I'm guessing either the values have not been identified, they have not been modeled, they have not been taught. And we are not saying that if you're going to stay in this organization, you have to live our organizational values. The leader, it's, again, it goes back to the leader is not making sure that everyone understands and lives those values because a toxic person will never align with a quality set of values.

Oh, absolutely. So we've got to do what it takes to really understand when we hire, right? When we hire so that that toxicity doesn't enter in the first place. Now, if we come along and they're already there, We've got to be willing to make cuts because, like you said, if you have values, you have to live by them. I'm amazed when CEOs will say, but we can't fire them. Oh, so values don't apply to everybody?

No, exactly. Oh no, she's our number one salesperson. We can't let go of her. We'd never be able to survive. Well, then it's all bets are off. The corporate culture is anything goes and everyone can act however they want to act as long as they produce on the bottom line. And guess what? Over time, no one wants to work in that environment. You lose your best people, and you do not attract the best people. So a short— you're worried about a short-term loss, and all you're doing in that moment is you're guaranteeing long-term lack of sustainability.

And there's another great example of what can kill teamwork: lack of long-term vision. Right? A lot of people on teams want to win today. But they forget what it takes to win the championship, right? So you have lots of games along the season to win the championship. You're gonna— you might even take some losses along those games to get you more prepared for the championship. And that's what so many people don't understand. When I was coaching, yes, we wanted to win conference, but if we hadn't and we won state, that's what mattered. We're, we're shooting to win the state championship. That's what mattered. Now, when you really build well and you have the right people, you can win both. You got to decide, though, which are we focused on right now?

Why are you there? If you don't know why you're there, you're going to be— you're going to struggle. My brother is an amazing softball coach, and he coaches at all different levels. And quite frankly, he would, during league play of his rec league team, he would let anyone play any position that they wanted to play. Even if it wasn't something they were particularly good at. And there were a few of the parents, it drove them nuts because they would lose a game because they didn't have their best people in their best position. But when it came time for the tournament and when it came time for the championship, he put the best people in the best spots. And so what he allowed the girls to do is to experiment, to learn about themselves, to enjoy the play, and He also allowed him and his assistant coaches to figure out who could play what position, who had the potential. And so, he was able to take someone, lead them to their potential, have the best players in the best position. And year after year after year, he won the championship, not because he had the best players, but because he got his players ready by allowing them to do what was important during the season so they could do what was important at the end of the season. And that made for an amazing team. They had clarity in what they were trying to accomplish, accomplish. And in the end, they accomplished it.

I love that. Love that, Sam. So we've talked about you need clarity. You need to be succinct with your values. You want to make sure that as a leader, both you're role modeling and you're supporting. It's both. It's not one or the other. You're doing both. These are keys to avoiding the pitfalls, the failure of lack of teamwork that can occur. And then being willing to remove the people from difficult situations, being able to remove toxicity. That's really important. That sometimes is the most painful part. Then sometimes, by the way, by what you described in coaching, that can be parents. Like you need to let a family leave. Like they need to leave the team. And that's okay. It's going to be better for the health of the team. Right?

Exactly.

So those were great examples. Sam, anything you want to add on here?

No, I think we're good. I think when people understand that, then what happens is they're going to build more effective teams. They're going to lead more effective teams. And they're going to achieve the goals that they want to achieve. And that's great. You know what? We just had someone. Let's see. Robert just said, wow, that's really good. Have the team try new things. But when it comes time, put them in their best positions. Exactly. And you know what, Robert? When, when you allow them to try new things, what happens is they realize that you want them to grow to be their best. And when they see you as a leader want them to grow to be their best, then that inspires them to want to be their best. And that's how you build an amazing team. You have people that want to be their best for each other, for their leader. And then what happens is you achieve those goals that you've set out for yourself. Yeah, wrap this up, Mike.

Yeah, I was. I was going to add to this because what's beautiful about that that we didn't discuss: when you put people in positions that are not their normal positions, they also gain a much greater respect for their fellow teammates. They understand what that person does that they don't do well by doing it, and it makes a huge difference. I used to be a swimming coach. We used to have sprinters swim a long-distance race. They, some of them. Hated it. They're like, "How could you do this to me?" Well, well, you're gonna understand have appreciation for that person. But at the same time, you'd have the distance person do sprint, right? So they tried different things, so they get appreciation also. And that is a valuable asset to a team: understanding each other's roles.

Well, listen, this has been a great conversation. And for everyone that's listening, either live or online afterwards, feel free to subscribe to our YouTube channels at Center for Respect YouTube slash Center for Respect. youtube.com/SamSilverstein. Subscribe, click on the bell so you get the notifications, and iTunes for the podcast. If you have thoughts or questions or ideas that you want us to talk about on a future show, leave it in the comments. We love being here with you. We'll see you next week.

Bye.