Mike DomitrzPresident, Author, and Speaker on Respect, The Center for Respect, Inc. · Author & Speaker on Respect for Schools, Corporations, & the Military since 1990 (has reached

You never owe anyone your body.

30 Jun 2025 · 1 min

Watch on YouTube

1:00

In this single‑speaker YouTube talk, the presenter (Mike Domitrz) asserts that no one ever owes another person sexual activity, images, or videos, regardless of relationship status, age differences, or past intimacy. He explains why many people feel guilty about refusing sexual requests: the desire to avoid disappointing the other person. He then challenges that mindset by arguing that disappointing others is inevitable and actually a sign of living one’s own life rather than living for others. The speaker reframes disappointment as a healthy indicator of personal autonomy, encouraging listeners to prioritize their own boundaries and choices over the expectations of others.

Chapters

Do you ever owe sexual activity, sexual imagery, sexual videos, photos? Do you ever owe? Yes or no? No. Never. Never. I don't care how popular they are. I don't care how long you two have been together. I don't care how far you've gone previously sexually that night or other nights before. You don't owe. I don't care if they're a senior and you're a freshman. You don't owe. But then some students go, Mike, I know I don't owe. I know, I get that. But I still feel bad saying no. Why do people feel bad saying no? The number one answer people say yes when they want to say no. I don't want to disappoint the other person. By the way, are you going to disappoint people in your life? Yes. Yes. In fact, I'm going to tell you something people don't normally say. If you're not disappointing people in life, you're probably having a miserable life. If you're not disappointing— let me explain why. If I'm doing what everybody else wants to keep them happy, whose life am I living? Theirs or mine? Theirs. Theirs. When you disappoint people, it means you're living your life. That's actually healthy.