How a Moment of Ecstasy Transformed My Life

It was the first time I got down into my body, and I was like, what the fuck is this? And it was literally orgasmic. Not saying I had an orgasm or any of that crazy stuff, but it was, like, spiritually, like my whole body was just in pure ecstasy. It was amazing. It was like, what is happening to me? Hey, badass. Welcome to Keeping It Real, the podcast where we ditch the nonsense, say it like it is, and redefine what it means. Means to feel good in your body and your life. I'm Misty Tripoli, creator of the Groove Method, and I'm here to help you move, dance, and live authentically and unapologetically. So if you're ready to break free from the societal expectations, embrace your truth, and find your own unique groove, you are in the right place. So let's keep it real, let's keep it wild, and let's keep it moving. Okay? So if you're still listening, you better fucking be following me. Yeah, like, support this, and I'll keep it coming. All right, we're gonna go a little bit deeper into what happened to me after this lowest point of my life, where I just wanted to end it. And I was done. And what shifted and what transformed over a very short period of time after this happened? This voice inside of me, this. I can't call it a voice. It's weird because it's like it's not really a voice. It was just like this kind of, like, calling this thing. Like, I needed to sit down and pay attention, and I didn't know really what that meant, and I was busy. I didn't have time for my intuition. I had shit to do, but it just kept calling. So after several days, I was like, okay, I don't know what this means, but in the morning, what I did is I would just sit in this chair, and I would close my eyes and just breathe for a moment. And it didn't last very long. I could barely get through a minute before I needed to get up. And I was. My mind was going a thousand miles a minute and whatever, but I continued to do it. So it was day after day. After about seven days, it was growing. You know, I was going a little bit more time and a little bit more time. And then, you know, I told you that I was a complete cunt to my boyfriend. Like, I was such a bitch. And my boyfriend at the time, I was actually a little bit in awe of him, even though I wanted to fucking kill him, because he happened to be one of the smartest people I'd Ever known. And it turned me on. He's a deep intellectual, and he had really deep thoughts and ideas about things. He was super connected to nature. He loved history. He studied so much of history and what had happened in the world and world history and just. He just was. He was fascinating to me because I was none of that. I was. You work and you make money. You work, you make money, you pay the bills. That was my whole life. I mean, I was literally a dude. In fact, one of my girlfriends said, mister, you have a bigger dick than your boyfriend. And my boyfriend had a huge dick. And that was quite. That was a reality check because I was so in my masculine, like, survival mode. Gotta pay the bills, gotta make the money. I was supporting him even though I was fascinated by him. I was supporting him like he didn't believe in the system. He was just like, money's a construct, blah, blah, blah, all of this stuff. And I just thought he was, you know, a conspiracy wacko job. But I was enthralled by it because he actually, like, thought about shit. Thought about shit. I never thought about or questioned. So I was like, that's kind of why I was with him, because he kind of turned me on at this intellectual level. I didn't realize I was an intellectual until I was with him. Then I was like, I like deep thoughts. They're delicious. They're kind of orgasmic. So anyways, back to the story. He was also a heavy pot smoker. He smoked a lot of weed. And I judged the fuck out of him. I criticized him constantly. I was made sure that he knew that I was disappointed in that behavior and that was not okay with me. And that I was better than him because I did not smoke weed and that I didn't need those things. And that I'm better than you. I'm going to judge you. And, you know, because he wasn't making money, so I judged it all based off of his ability to make money, which was really interesting. The conditioning we've been through. Dear God. Anyways, so I'd always been mean to him about this. Through our relationship, the eye rolls, the. All the shit that we do as women to make sure that the men in our lives know that we're disappointed in what they're doing. And I had no idea that the power of what that does to a man like you totally emasculate them with the roll of your eye, your disappointments, your whatever. And that we don't really tend to build men up. We tear them down. And I think that's sad. But that's another whole keeping it real conversation. Okay, so stay tuned for that one. Anyways, I judged him. I had a really hard time with it. I was completely against it. To me, marijuana was a drug. You don't do it, you shouldn't do it. And so one day, kind of all. At the midst of all of this happening, he said to me, he goes. He finally, like, stood up to me, which was. Pissed me off. And it was awesome. In the same moment, he was like, listen, you really need to shut the fuck up, because you don't know what you're talking about. You've never smoked weed. You have no idea what you're even talking about. So you need to be quiet until you actually have some information about it or you have some experience with it, and then we can have a conversation about it. And I was so fucking pissed. I was so mad at him because he was right and I was wrong, and my ego got punched, and I was like, I love to be right, and I wasn't. So after a couple of weeks, you know, after me, like, now sitting with myself, things are starting to just evolve a little bit. Like, I'm really starting to question some things. And so I had to admit that he was right. Like, fucking A, he's right. So I finally said, okay, you're right. I want to try it. Teach me what it is, what this is that you do, okay? And I was still in complete judgment. Yeah, teach me. But I'm going to show you that it's wrong. And so we're in the kitchen. So he lights up the bong. I take a hit, like, Because I was a control freak, and so I couldn't control it. I couldn't control what was happening to me. And so I just started to get nauseous, and I thought I was gonna throw up. And the room started to spin, and I was like, oh, fuck. Like, I'm going down. And he instantly was like, you need to dance. And he put music on, and the music hit me, and I started to dance, and I came alive in a way that I'd never experienced myself before. It was like I was the dance. I was the music and the mu. I couldn't control. Like, my body just started just. And I was in awe of myself. And it felt so good. It felt so real. It felt so alive. It felt so free. Cause I'd always controlled everything, even my movement, my dance. I was, you know, fitness instructor. Everything was, like, the structure and the fitness, and you have to do 10 reps and blah blah, blah, choreograph. There's a 5, 6, 7, 8. And there's a structure to it, right? And in that moment, what marijuana did for me is it allowed the mind, my mind, to completely shut off. And I actually got into my body for the first time. Even though I was a dancer, even though I was a fitness professional, I still lived from here up. It was all about what I was thinking about, my world. And so I actually, it was the first time I got down into my body and I was like, what the fuck is this? And it was literally orgasmic. Not saying I had an orgasm or any of that crazy stuff, but it was like spiritually, like my whole body was just in pure ecstasy. It was amazing. It was like, what is happening to me? And I want to have a little side note right now. I say this and I share this story because I don't think marijuana is for everyone. And I'm not advocating it. I'm not saying go do it. I'm not saying this is your answer. I'm not saying any of those things because it does affect everyone differently. It affects you. Depending on where your mind is at. It also affects the chemistry of your body. Your chemistry might not work with it. It is not for everyone. Let's just get that straight. For those of you who know, I'm taught, like, you know who I'm talking to and you've had the same experience where you're like, yeah, my creativity goes off the rails. I'm like, oh my God. I get into the flow when I'm on, like, you know who I'm talking to. So this is what happened to me. And I had been in my head my whole life, not in my body. I was at war with my body. I hated my body. You know, a bulimic, like, just. I was at complete war. Every day was a judgment of the size of my fucking thighs. Like, ah, the scale, the calories, the dis. I was a slave to it. And in this moment, I was free. And I had never felt so good in my body. And I didn't realize how my body actually really wanted to move because I always controlled it. And I could move well, but it was always controlled movement. And this was such a fucking turning point for me, this one moment. So in this moment of me smoking marijuana for the first time was like doing ayahuasca. And anyone knows what ayahuasca is? It's what all, like many indigenous cultures use. The shamans and the medicine people of these cultures use to be able to transcend into the spirit world and actually get out of this third dimensional hard construct that keeps us so, like, in the grind and in these loops and not in our spirit. And so it allows them to. It opens up the mind. It actually literally, like, even scientifically opens up the mind so that you can see. Like, this inner eye literally opens. And it's like, what? Hello? That's what marijuana did for me. And I was like, what the fuck? Like, in that moment, I knew I'd been lied to. Since the moment I was born, I believed everything I like, who God was, what God was, what life was, what. The right government, the best country, the way things are supposed to be. Like, I just realized I had been programmed like, that fast. It was just like, everything I think is a program. I don't even know what I believe. I believe everything fucking well. Like, I was just like, I was beyond myself after this. I almost could not speak for two weeks because I was like, what are even words? What are even words? Like, what are these sounds coming through my mouth and my lips and my throat and there's words. And then you understand, like, just crumbled, like the matrix melted. And I was like, what the. How is this even possible? Like, we're in a construct. Like, I just. And from that moment, everything changed. So stay tuned, because in the next episode, I'm gonna give you the next chapter of how things like, bam. The decisions I made, the leaps of faith that I took. So join me in episode three. Mm. Keeping it real. Getting out of this shit, and living your best fucking life. All right, fierce ones, that's a wrap for today. Thanks for keeping it and grooving with me. If you're loving this vibe, be sure to subscribe, share, and leave a review so that we can keep this movement alive. Remember, this journey is all about you. You, owning your own truth, trusting your instincts, and living boldly. Stay true, stay wild, and most importantly, keep being unapologetically you. So until next time, let's keep it real. Sat.