Keepin' It Real - Q&A Living in Mexico | Episode Seven

So let's just make a little bit of Groovin a part of every conversation. So because, you know, part of what I do here and why I'm doing it is to inspire people to shake their ass. It'll change your whole life. So anyways, this is my Mr. Tripoli. This is Keeping It Real, episode seven, the Jungle Stories. Couple housekeeping. Before we get started, number one, if you're just joining me, this is your first. You can go and watch all the episodes on my highlight reel or on my Keeping it real podcast on YouTube so you can find it either place. You can go back and watch the past episodes and be live for the future episodes. I'm so happy you guys are here. Thanks for coming. Okay, so that. What else did. Oh, I have a present for you. If you go to my link tree on my Instagram, I have now added my Spotify link so you can go there. And I have such great music like this song. This is on my. The classics. This music just to hang with your friends, be alone, sing along. So I've got lots of playlists there for you to start. I'm going to be adding to it constantly. So go there and enjoy the music Link tree. You'll see my Spotify list, it's ready for you. You're welcome, by the way, because great music can shift your energy, hit your soul, change your day. So, yeah, go there and enjoy that. All right. All right, let's get into it. So last week, last episode, we ended with. With the love of my life. Truly the love of my life. I'd never felt love like this before in my life. And I was in a heaven now. I was just like, I get why people are addicted to this because I'd never felt that before. I liked people. I thought it was love, but I didn't. Like, I would sacrifice my whole self for him. I would have died for this man. Like, that kind of love. So picking back up in meeting the love of my life. So like I said, we're living in Playa del Carmen, living our best lives, just the to be loved. Like, that was so euphoric. And it was like the greatest drug I'd ever taken in my life. And I don't take drugs, but I might smoke drugs, but I don't take drugs. Not drugs, medicine. So everything's fabulous. But he keeps telling me that he needs me to be there. And like I said, it ended up after five years of living together there and having just the most delicious life. But again, I wasn't there a lot because I was traveling with Nike, teaching, and he had cheated on me. And how I found out was I got home. I was home for probably about a week. And I'm on Facebook, and we're friends on Facebook. And I saw that he was tagged in a photo. And I went to the photo and. And it was with him and a group of people on the beach. And this girl was kissing him. And she made some sweet comment, like, my new love something. And I was like, huh. So I sent her a message. And I just was straight up. I was like, listen, this is who I am. You know, this person lives with me. He's my boyfriend. From a woman to woman. Like, I don't fault you at all. Like, just know that, like, love to you. You probably had no idea or. But I just need to know for my sake, you know, did you sleep with him? What happened? And if you did have sex, did you have unprotected sex? Like, I need to know these answers. And like I said, just help a woman out because he lives with me, and he's been my boyfriend for the last five years. And she was completely open and honest and apologized, and it was really lovely. And I just said, you know. And she just was like, oh, my God. Like, you know, yes, we had unprotected sex. Oh, my God. And just like, ah. So my world, in that moment came completely crumbling down. Like, I just. I. I didn't know that you could actually feel heartbreak. Like, I felt a pain deep in my chest that was just like a knife was just right in my heart all the time. And, you know, obviously I made him leave. It was really hard because I loved him so much, and I know he loved me, but I. The story in my mind, I couldn't. That was so unacceptable. And how could he do this to me? And we loved each other so much. In the story I was telling myself about it. And, you know, of course I contacted. Eventually I contacted my mom. I was in such a dark place for so long. I think it was about six months now. Keep in mind, around the exact same time, which is another story, probably the next episode is I started to partner with a woman from Canada to help me build the business of groove. Build this world. Groove Movement. Do the business part. While I was out promoting and growing it, that her job would be to build the website, the training systems, all of this stuff. So we agreed, had a partnership, and systematically, she stole the whole business from me. So at the same time, he cheats on me. That happens. This was my year of betrayal. Like, I Trusted everybody. Like, because I'm legal Eagle. Like, I'll. I want to do. Like, I want to do things right and fair. Like, I want to be as fair as I possibly can be all the time. And, yeah, she literally stole my business, copyrighted all of my intellectual property in her name, stole my trademark, stole my website, my Facebook, everything. And that'll be another story, like I said next week. So I'm in this deep, dark night of the soul, and I was on such a high, like, literally a crash into blackness. And I got to this feeling where I wasn't. Like, I didn't want to kill myself or anything. Like, no. But I was just. I. I went into the story of, I'm such a good person. How can these things happen to me? I'm like, why would they? You know? And I didn't yet ask myself why I attracted it and why I needed to go through these experiences. It was just all outside of me. Woe is me. Woe is me. I was in the woe is me Olympics. Let me tell you. Like, oh, oh, whoa. Like, oh, he cheated on me. Oh. You know, And I wasn't. I felt it. But that was my story at the moment. And that's what allowed me to keep this emotional energy running, because even though it was so dark, and this is what I realized about experiencing the full range of what is possible in being a human that to when you're in it, be in it. And I actually got addicted to it, like, as a. As, like, this was now my new norm. Okay. But on the. I now had to start putting on a front because I was still traveling, teaching Groove all around the world, going through this at the same time. So I'm having to now wear a mask again because I can't be that person in front of all these people. But I was very aware of, you know, I'd do my sessions and I'd go home, back to my hotel room and cry my eyes out and scream and woe is me. And life was awful and why me? And how could they do this to me? And all this. And a couple things happened in this deep, deep darkness. Now we're about five, six months in now of just black and not knowing what I'm going to do. Don't know what I'm going to do about my business. I'm not traveling the world promoting Groove, but now I don't even. I can't even associate my name with the word groove. Like, I didn't know. I just. So I had to. I didn't Know what to do. And I literally didn't know what to do. And so my two faces, I knew they were two faces. I remembered the work of Byron Katie because I had been messing with her stuff before. I knew I needed to do the work. Her stuff is called the work. I knew I needed to do the work on this because this darkness, even though I was addicted to it, I was done with it. Like, I needed a way out, but I couldn't get out of my loop. And yep, Byron Katie, the work. And I resisted it. And I resisted it. And it was my ego that was resisting it. Because a huge part like her book is called who would you be without your story? Like, exactly. Who would Misty be in that moment without this story? He cheated on me. She stole from me. Everyone. Like, oh, I've been so betrayed. What if I didn't have that story? Who would. Who would Misty be? And so telling yourself the truth, because so many of us feel stuck in our lives because we don't know who we would be without the story we tell ourselves about the excuses why we can't do it or the so and so and the pointing the fingers. And they did this to me, and I'm this way because of them. And. And what if you just went, who would I be without all that? Like, it's some powerful stuff. So finally, eventually, I did the work on my lover and my broken heart and that, you know, he cheated on me. How could he do that? That meant he, like, he didn't love me, you know, I'm not beautiful. Like, all of these things. And I had to ask myself if those things were true. And I came to the understanding that he didn't cheat on me. He loved me so much. And I knew it gonna make me cry. And I loved him. It was so beautiful. It's so lovely to be able to experience that in your life, you know? And what a beautiful blessing he was. And I got to tell myself the truth that he did not try. He never wanted to hurt me. He just was in his 20s and needed to be in his. I had to tell myself the truth. Like, get real with myself. And that's what Byron Katie did, is she got me to tell myself the truth, which was that had nothing to do with how much he loved me. He's in his 20s. He needs to go out and have fun. I'm never here. He's implied Del Carmen. Everyone's. He's a diver. He's with naked women all day. Mostly naked women all day. They're flirting and having Fun. And he needs to have a social life. Misty, tell yourself the truth. And he and I are. I'm so glad I did because I learned I. I was able to contact him and said, listen, we aren't meant to be. We don't fit in each other's lives at this time. But I know I don't want you. I don't ever not want you. Part of my life. And he said the same. I want you, like. But we're at two different parts in our life, and we have to both live our life. You need this, and I want this. And we're still friends to this day, 17 years later. Like, he's one of my best friends. Like, I know I could call him and he would hold the space for me to communicate and share everything that I feel. So. So that's what's awesome about this. The work with Byron, Katie, and changing the way that I framed everything and told myself the truth. The other betrayal thing was a whole other thing. Like I said, that's going to be next week. And how I got through that. But what actually shifted everything for me again to get out of the darkness is, I was told again, deep in my gut, that thing when the groove came to me like a download. This was like another download. And I was home from one of my trips, and I was in Mexico and I had stopped dancing. I stopped. Like, when I was home, I wouldn't do anything. I would just sit and cry. And I used to go to the beach every day and dance and swim in the ocean and just my. I didn't have a desire to do any of that. And this download that came to me said, you better fucking dance. And I was like, I know. Fuck. And I was just, all right, whatever. And I finally was just like, okay, I'll do it. And I put my ipod on, went down to the beach, and when the music hit me, gone. I entered into the no thought, just right back into the deliciousness of why I dance and why I created groove and what groove is all about. And I was just grooving to just in my groove, in my flow, and in this moment, all of the answers came. It was like relief, relief, relief, clarity. Oh, yes. That's what I need to do. Yes. And every. I just got. By the time I left that beach, I felt like I had wings and I could fly. I was like, I. I know exactly what I have to do to get my business back. To heal my broken heart. Like, I know what I have to do. That first step was telling myself the truth. The second step was this. A powerful awakening in that moment when I was dancing on the beach that I was told, you need to love yourself the way you loved him, which meant you were willing to sacrifice for him. You would cater to his every need. You would do anything he wanted to make him happy. You praised him constantly. You told him what a wonderful man he was and how much like, the things he did for you, how much you appreciated him. You need to do that to yourself. And do not even consider entering into another relationship until you have done that. And I was like, well, God damn, okay, that's what I got to do. Like. And from that moment, I knew I was going to. I then I was like, I'm marrying myself. That's it. I'm going marry myself. And holy, that was. I had a full on ceremony, full on the ring, the vows. You want to have a powerful assignment for yourself, Write wedding vows to yourself. What would you say to yourself? Like, that's some powerful shit I had to write. Like, till death do us part. I will honor you. I will respect you. I will love you. I will take care of you in sickness and in health. I will. You're the most beautiful thing I've ever. Like, I'm so lucky I get to marry you and be with you and have a relationship with you. Those were my vows to myself. And then, whoo. Mama was having so much fun, my heart was healed. I had my beautiful love in my life in the appropriate way he was supposed to be in my life. I got to still enjoy moments with him that were not sexual at all. Just the way that we love to sit and have conversation and just share ideas and that mental, you know, stimulation, spiritual stimulation. Dancing on the beach every day, taking myself out dancing every night. Like, just like, bam. I. I was dating myself, taking myself out to dinner, spoiling myself. But you know what? The one thing I wasn't doing, which I never did and I never allowed myself to do, was to have true pleasure, sensual and sexual pleasure. Because I had been so disconnected from my body with bulimia and all of that over exercise and always hating myself and judging myself and being so critical of my body and every part of it and never loving it. I never gave it permission to have, like, true pleasure and like, sex was whatever a man gave me. I never asked for what I wanted. I never. I didn't know the sensual misty. Even though I was aware of so many things now in my life, that was a. That was a wall for me. So I'm loving my life. Dating Myself, but I'm not going home and myself, I'm just going home and going to bed and I'm in my 40s, my hormones are on fire because that's when those last eggs are going boom and they're pumping and you're hormones are like impregnate this body. That's why I understand the cougar thing. I was a cougar. Hell yeah. Because you, I'm. I've got the hormones of a 20 year old boy. That's what it felt like. Like. But I was, but I wasn't doing anything about it like that. I just, I just ignored that whole part of myself, literally. And so I told you this was going to be like a two, three part series on just this part of my life. So that is how I learned to really just enjoy my own company, Heal myself from a broken heart and know that I have everything inside of me, that it all exists inside of me and that my happiness is critical and it's my responsibility. Just like your happiness is. Do not put anything on anyone. You have to take responsibility for your life and your happiness. And it's not something you pursue. It's just something that you can be in the moment and create in the moment. Don't pursue it. Find a way to be it. So you fill your life with the shit that makes you so happy. It makes your nipples hard. Like literally. And that's your job, that's your responsibility. But that's how abundance got even more for me because I was, I was loving my life. I was letting life love me. And that's one of my mantras. Life Loves me. That's the name of my company in Mexico. Life loves me because it does. So anyways, we're going to end it here because I think we've been talking for. Oh yeah, like 23 minutes. I told you 20 to 30 minutes. So you're just going to have to come back next week and I'll share the next phase of all of this, which is I knew I had to learn to make love to myself. Like make love to myself. Like really go there. And that scared the out of me. So that's we're gonna pick up next week. I'm so thanks for hanging in there and listening to the story. I love telling it and I hope it gives you some insight. If whatever you're going through in your life to tell yourself the truth, get out of your story, go make do the things that make you happy, like it's your full time job. Yeah, do that. Have a great rest of your day. Next week we are picking back up right here and it's going to be all about how I did that. I started making sweet, sweet love to this body and, oh, the magic. So stay tuned. See you next week. This was Keeping It Real, episode seven, I believe. Have a great day, guys. Love you. Thanks. Sunflowers Take Linda. Nurse Ken, Laura. Thanks for being here, you guys. Singer Designs. I appreciate you listening. Share with your friends and I'll see you next week. And if you want the behind the scenes of my life, make sure you check my story every day because that's where I post the real shit behind the scenes. Okay, I love you. Bye for now.