In this episode of the "We Rise" podcast, host Neetu interviews Payal Sultania, an educator turned parenting coach, child counselor, and NLP practitioner. Payal shares how her early work teaching young children revealed the uniqueness of each child's learning style, leading her to train with the Madras Dyslexia Association and later obtain a DEEP (Developmental Parental Coaching) certification. She discusses the growing openness of parents to coaching, emphasizing that parenting is a skill that can be learned. When counseling children, Payal highlights that listening and sharing are the primary tools, noting children’s pure, non‑judgmental nature. The conversation then shifts to systemic shortcomings in mainstream education—over‑reliance on grades, large class sizes, and a lack of individualized learning assessments. Payal advocates for assessing each child’s learning style and tailoring instruction accordingly. The dialogue also touches on homeschooling, the impact of social media and smartphones on parent‑child connection, and practical parenting strategies: connect before correcting, focus on positive behaviors, and practice mindful presence. The episode concludes with Payal’s core message to parents: honor and respect each child’s individuality, which will enable them to flourish.
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Hello, hello everyone and welcome to yet another podcast of We Rise. We Rise by lifting others. And today we have Payal Sultania with us. She is an educator, she is an NLP coach, a parent coach, and a children counselor. So welcome, Payal Sultania, and please introduce yourself and let us know about your journey.
Thank you so much, Neetu, for calling me on the VRISE platform. I'm so happy and grateful to you to have you— have been with you here. So, uh, I am Payal Sultania and I'm a parenting coach and a child counselor as well. So basically what I do is, um, my fascination— actually, I follow my passion and fascination, that is like bringing the children and the parents together on the same page so that they have a beautiful and a very sound relationship. That actually is my work, and I love my work. That is how it's been.
Superb. So I mean, uh, being an educator, how did you find out, you know, that you need to be a parent coach? And then finally you started, you know, this whole thing. I'm sure you must have gone through some kind of trainings for this. So I mean, what is it that clicked you to get into this coaching thing?
Actually, I was, I was an educator. I used to teach small kids, and I used to enjoy that journey a lot when I was teaching children. And when then I started teaching, I felt that every, every child is unique, and they have different learning abilities, and they learn in a different way. So I just wanted to explore more about this. And then what happened is an opportunity which I got through Madras Dyslexia Association, where I got trained, teacher training for teaching and knowing about dyslexia. And then I came across actually that I am fascinated and I have a passion towards identifying those kids and making them to learn how they want. It's not like, you know, what we want them to learn. It's basically about kids, how they want to learn. So that is what it persuaded me to have a very good relationship with children, teach them in the way they like. And then when I actually was teaching these kind of children, I came across many parents who were like confused how to, you know, parent children, how to understand and how to, uh, you know, have an emotional balance with the kids and how to relate with them. That's when I came across, I mean, a certification journey from DEEP, that is Development Parental Coaching, wherein I got, I just got to learn about parenting. And I was really very, very fascinated and happy to know that there are tools and there are, you know, management skills by which if we apply to our kids, to ourselves as parents, and to know who we are actually as parents, it has given me such a lot of, you know, enlightenment, I would say, that there are a lot many things as a parent and coach I can actually— and we should all learn it for sure.
Great, great. So tell me one thing, I mean, uh, are parents open to coaching? Because what I have understood is that people think that, you know, when I am a parent, I know everything, and they do not want to take an advice from someone else. So what has been your experience with these parents?
Yeah, yeah, that's absolutely true, Neetu. That's really very true. Uh, we as parents, we always think that we know everything. Once a child, a baby comes to our hand, we know that we know everything. We are mothers, we know everything. But actually, you know, I'll tell you one fact. Parent is not only the biological parent. Did you know about it? Did you know biological is not the only parent of a child. A child, by the, you know, the whole entire family who, who are actually totally, and I would say like practically involved in growing up the children. That would be grandparents if they are staying with the child at home. That can be the caretaker who is staying with the child at home. So it's a proper, you know, it's a balance of all the unit in the family, or even the outsourced person who are taking care of the children at home. They are basically the parents. And now, uh, yes, coming to your question, you said that whether the, you know, parents are open to coaching or not. It's, it is actually coming into, uh, you know, platform nowadays. The parent are, parents are understanding that it is an art. And I recently came across a client who said that I, I didn't know that parenting was an art, and no one ever told us that, you know, that we should be learning parenting. Parenting is a skill which has to be learned. If we learn it the way it has to be done, then this world will be definitely a beautiful place to live in for all of us. And yes, people are being open to coaching nowadays.
Wow, that's great. And in general, because I've been speaking to a lot of coaches these days, and I believe that yes, people are opening up to coaching and mentoring because they have realized, especially the millennials, that, you know, there is a problem, uh, that needs to be addressed, and they're willing to, you know, address that problem. And you know, instead of hiding it or putting it under the carpet. So that's, that's one big change that we are seeing and really happy to see that. Uh, and if you are also experiencing the same, then that also adds to, you know, uh, my validation of that people are opening up to coaching, which is great. So when you are handling children, you know, for their counseling, I mean, they're just too small. I don't know. Uh, what does it take to, you know, counsel children? Uh, I mean, what kind of emotional intelligence one would need to even understand what's going through on their mind? Because they're not very open all the time. So how do you manage that?
Yeah, that's a very good question. People might have that question in mind always, that how do you counsel children? To tell you the fact, Neetu, actually I would let you know Whenever I counsel the children, it's the easiest thing to do. You know why?
Because they are pure souls.
They don't just say something, and even they are not judgmental as, you know, we grown-ups are. So it's, it's a, you know, kind of clean field, and they speak their heart out. So it's very easy for us. You don't need to do anything. You don't need to manage them. You just need to listen to them. You just need to share with them. When you start listening and sharing, everything comes into play.
You—
we did not manage the kids, as you said, like counseling easy is the easiest job we can do because we just need to listen to them, we just need to share with them, and we just need to communicate well. That is how I do, and it's really very amazing.
Great. So do you see that there is any kind of gap in the current education system where, you know, because, uh, the child is, uh, sitting in a class of 25-30 people and the teacher does not have the time also to connect, and they spend a lot of time with the teachers. So do you think there is a disconnect somewhere in— and, and that is causing some kind of problem in children? And that could be— I mean, what could be the easiest way to fix it, if at all there is a problem in the education system right now?
Uh, yes, uh, definitely, I agree to that. There is gap in the education system where everyone is not on the same page. The children needs to have much more more hands-on experience in learning and learning the life skills, which exactly is, you know, missing in the education department as a whole. They just focus on the marks, the grades, and they do not understand the learning abilities of the child. Actually, every one of us should know that every child is unique and they have their own learning abilities and they have their own learning styles. Some child may learn it by visualizing, Some child may learn by, you know, only listening. Some children learn by dancing or using their, you know, their gross motor skills and their fine motor skills, and they learn. Some may, you know, just connect with some people and connect, you know, the learnings with the learning style of the child. It will become much more easier for the educational background also to make the children learn. But now the situation is such, I mean, the education system is such that they are teaching 40 children in a row in a class in the same pattern. They don't know what a child wants. We are just keep on giving them what we want them. We have never focused on the need of the child. That is actually totally missing in our education system. But if we find a way out, what I would suggest is every child should be assessed, their learning ability, their learning styles, and according to that, if we mold them Rather than grading them and to make them learn in their own way, in the which— in the area which they want to do, they will excel like anything. And even all of us, this world will be a beautiful place to stay in.
Absolutely, absolutely. So I have two children. One of them goes to school and one of them homeschools, but this is something that they have chosen for themselves. We do not, you know, pressurize them, them to, you know, either go to school or don't. It's, it's an individual choice, a choice the children have made, and we completely respect the choice. And I think, uh, I understand because, you know, being a homeschooling parent, uh, I am also very focused on their learnings the way they want it to be. So yeah, totally agree with you on that. Absolutely agree with you on that. And then, um, you know, what, what do you think that, you know, can be done to maintain a better healthy relationship between the parent and the child? Because these days everybody is on social media, right? So parent is also spending a lot of time on social media. Even children 13, 14 years of children are getting, uh, you know, smartphones to themselves and they're spending a lot of time there. So I mean, it seems like there is a disconnect between them. And if— is there a healthy way to bring them back together on a platform and, you know, make them communicate more? What are your views on that?
Yeah, definitely, uh, there is a way to communicate. But before that, I would, I would like to acknowledge that the way you have been homeschooling your kid And, you know, honoring her choice, that's a very good thing to do. Many of the parents don't do that. They just find, find the conventional way, right, and keep on doing it. So kudos to you, Nitu. Just keep, I mean, doing it the best you are doing for your kids. And now coming back to your question, I would like to say that yes, uh, the good healthy relationship between a parent and a child can be maintained First and foremost thing is effective— effectively communicate with your child. When you try to know what your child wants rather than imposing your ideas on what you want with a child, that connection will definitely happen. Secondly, I would say that connect to the child before you correct them. That is very important. Once you start connecting with your child, correction will happen automatically. Third is always try. What we do is, as a parent, we all— we always keep focusing on the things which they are not doing. But once we start focusing and accentuating the positive behavior of the child, they get motivated and they do better. And last is the most important thing is we have to be mindfulness. We have to be mindful and conscious in our parenting that is very, very important. So these are the main key rules I would say every parent should follow to have a beautiful relationship with their children.
Superb, superb. Thank you so much for the insights, very, very valuable. Uh, what, you know, what would be your final words before we bring this to a close? I mean, what message do you want to pass on to the parents and the children who are watching this program?
Okay, though my first and foremost, my foremost message to the parents would be that honor and respect your child for who they are. That is very important because once you start respecting them, you get it back from them in a very larger manner which you would not even believe. And always believe that every child is Everyone has their own quality, qualities in their abilities if you show them the way. So that is how I would like to end. Please respect them and honor them for who they are. They will flourish like a bloom in a garden for sure.
Superb, superb. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for coming today and giving the insights. Um, lovely having you today on the program. And anybody who wants a parent Advice, I mean, Payal is a person to go to. Uh, yeah, so, uh, I think I'll put on her credentials of LinkedIn over here, and anybody who wants to reach out can reach out to her. And I think that brings us to a close, and thank you once again.
