New Book! "REAL TALK: No Bullsh*t Life Advice for Young Men"

Okay, if you're a frequent listener of the Dad Starting Over podcast and you find yourself saying, "Yeah, that sounds like me," well, you don't need another podcast episode. What you need is support. The Help for Men Brotherhood is where men go when they're done pretending that they got it all handled. You know, your dead bedrooms, your divorce, your loneliness, your rebuilding life. We have private forums, frequent live Zoom meetings, one-on-one coaching, courses, all my books at no additional charge. And yes, we get together in person. Real men and real conversations. So stop doing this alone and join the Help for Men Brotherhood today at help4men.com/join. I look forward to seeing you in the next member meeting. Hey everyone, D.S. Hill here from dadstartingover.com, and I have a big announcement for those that don't know, that don't follow me on the Facebook, or you're on the email newsletter, or Instagram, or whatever have you. I have a new book out, and it is called Real Talk: No Bullshit Life Advice for Young Men. Just like the title sounds like, this book is aimed at young dudes. This book is basically— the genesis of the book is, um, I've been doing the one-on-one coaching thing for years now. I've spoken to well over 1,000 dudes by now. And, um, you know, after about hearing for the 843rd time, how come nobody taught us this shit when we were kids? Um, finally it dawned on me, maybe I should write a a book aimed at the kids, saying the things that I and so many other men have noticed or have thought over the years when it comes to this stuff about relationships, about girls/women, about being a man in today's world, all that fun stuff. And so I did. And the book, again, it's called Real Talk No Bullshit Life Advice for Young Men. You can go to realtalkbook.co. That's realtalkbook.co or go to dadstartingover.com and scroll down and you'll see the Real Talk book cover. You can click on that. You can order the book on Amazon in the Kindle format, in print format. It is now available on Apple Books for download if you're an iPhone user. Um, we also have a PDF that you can download, a mobile-friendly PDF, uh, directly from the, uh, Dad Starting Over site or the Real Talk site. Audiobook format is coming soon. It has been submitted. We're at the mercy of Audible and all the others as far as how quickly they have to review the book and they have to make sure audio quality is up to snuff and all that fun stuff. And that can sometimes unfortunately take months. So just be patient, but that is coming, the audiobook version. Some of the stuff that is in the book, or some— let's talk about first of all, some caveats, some warnings here. Yes, there is foul language in the book. The reason being, and I address that right up front in the book, is that I tell the reader, who is presumably a young man— may not be, could be an older dude. I think some older men may get something out of this as well. But, um, I tell right up front that I write the book as if I'm talking to a man, because that is who the reader is now. If you're a teenage boy in the pubertal phase or post-puberty phase and going into young adulthood, you're a man now. And that's how I talk to you. I give you no bullshit advice. No bullshit perspective on this whole life thing, coming from a dude who's almost 50 years of age. Uh, I do get a little graphic when it comes to topics such as puberty and sex. These are not issues that you need to kind of, you know, tiptoe around and talk in a nuanced way. You have to be very blunt. Um, this is puberty. This is what puberty means. This is what your body's going through during puberty. Um, you're gonna have, you know, a lot of urges to have sexual intercourse with girls. Here's why that is not such a good idea, and here is why you need to wait. Here's why sex is a complicated thing. Talk about the use of condoms. If you decide, you know, you're going to cave into the pressures, your own internal pressure and desire and needs, and go for it, then you need to protect yourself. We talk about the importance of looking at things from the girl's perspective on Why girls are so damn picky and how it's important when we're playing this little mating game, so to speak, of, you know, girls and boys saying, look at me, look at me, pay attention to me. Um, what's going on with that and what it is that you need to focus on as a kid and how your looks— yeah, they do matter. You need to take care of yourself physically and the way you dress, the way you present yourself. You need to take care of your brain and the way you, uh, the way you approach life in terms of seeing things with abundance as opposed to this toxic scarcity that is just so infectious. Um, how it's very important that you don't worship girls to an unhealthy degree. That yes, bad girls do exist, and it's important that you put up boundaries. It's important you be a vulnerable person, but not to the point of being a weirdo, um, vulnerable person, somebody takes things a little bit too far. How it's important to be social. The concept of nice guys, and yes, nice guys finish last, and what I mean by that. How it's important to hang out with other men. The, uh, I Get Real. This will be of interest to a lot of parents, I think. Um, I Get Real when talking about pornography and how that is— it's a fantasy land— and how it is not so good, and how I recommend to the young men to give it a break for a while. Because it is, um, yes, you're— if you're a parent, you have a teenage boy, they're looking at pornography. We just, we just know this. They have that little supercomputer phone in their pocket, probably, if they're like 90% of the kids out there. Then yeah, they're looking at pornography. So we talk about, hey, this is what you're seeing, this is why it's real, this is why it's not the best thing in the world for you. I talk about the concept of being a gentleman, what it is and what it isn't, um, and how that ties into this abundance mentality. And, um, and then I talk about what, uh, chapter 3, I talk about what's the ugly truth and how things— life isn't fair. And, uh, yes, in a way girls have it easier than boys, but boys have our advantages too. Um, how in the process of, uh, improving yourself, you're going to lose friends. It's just one of the ugly parts of life. Um, if you have a girlfriend, how she is not necessarily the one. You just have so much more maturing to do. Uh, it's tough to find a girl these days that doesn't have a lot of red flags. And I go into the concept of red flags and why winning at life and all the stuff we're talking about is, is really, really difficult. And how it's, it's tough. In Chapter 4, I talk about tying it all together and how it's really difficult to do all these things. And it's important not to do all these things at once. One thing at a time. For guys that listen to my stuff quite a bit on the podcast, read my articles, and read the books, it is a lot like a lot of the other stuff that I've already written, but I put it all together in a very quick form specifically for young men. This is— when I envisioned this book, it's the, the guy pulling a young man aside and saying, have a seat, sit down. I'm just gonna tell you everything I wish somebody had told me. That's what this is. The book is not overly long, which is a good thing for young men. A young man, if I put a 300-page book in front of him, is gonna go, "Ugh, I don't know, man." If I put a 150-page book in front of him, he may be like, "Yeah, I'll read a little bit at a time." That mobile-friendly PDF or the Kindle version is probably even more convenient. It's on his phone, which is something he's on all the time. He can flip over to it, read a few pages, go away from it because a lot of kids tend to show some kind of ADHD-type symptoms. Not a lot of, um, not a lot of attention span in the youngsters these days. So the book is written with that in mind. Let's keep it simple, let's get to the point. Boom boom boom. The audio version, once it is out, I believe comes in at just under 3 hours total of audio. So it's not that long of a book, so just 3 hours of audio total. Read at a pretty good pace. And again, the book is called Real Talk, Real Talk, No Bullshit Life Advice for Young Men. Please check it out on Amazon. You go directly to the website at dadstartingover.com or to realtalkbook.co, realtalkbook.co. Do me a favor, if you read it and you like it, please leave a review on Amazon. That is the big driver for, as far as Google is concerned,, you know, search engine optimization and getting my name out there, what it is. Amazon is— they are the, the biggest game in town. So even if you didn't buy it from Amazon, please leave a review there. That helps me out a great deal. Again, real talk, no bullshit life advice for young men. Give it a listen— or give it a read, rather— later on. Give it a listen. Um, for you parents that are buying it for your kiddos, man, I greatly appreciate it. I appreciate you trusting me with your uh, with your kid and, uh, giving them some, uh, real talk, some real life advice. I appreciate that. And for some men out there, you may want to give it a read yourself, and you may come away with a few little nuggets of wisdom. Nothing wrong with that. All right guys, thank you so much for listening, and we'll have, uh, here pretty soon, I would say by, um, at November the latest, I have another book coming out. But I won't tease anymore beyond that. Just keep keep your eyes and ears open for yet another book. It's going to be a big, big ending to 2022 for the DSO world. All right, guys, thank you for listening.