The host compares porn's appeal to fast food: instant gratification with negative consequences. He identifies three things women can learn from its popularity: men want spontaneous sexual interest requiring minimal effort, they're drawn to youthfulness maintained through appearance and energy, and lasting attraction comes from playful demeanor rather than perfection.
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I've been open about my opinion that habitual watching of pornography is a pretty bad thing for men. Why is it so bad? Because it is the nutrient-deficient fast food version of the real thing. Instead of a meal made with real ingredients cooked carefully by your own hands, It's just a Big Mac, large fries, and a milkshake handed to you immediately at the McDonald's drive-through. Instead of providing you with the calories and the nutrients needed to sustain and repair your body, it's just a quick tasty meal that gives you explosive diarrhea 30 minutes later. And we all know this, yet people line up for porn and fast food all day, every day. We all know it's not the best thing for us, yet both industries rake in billions of dollars year after year. Why? Well, both fast food and porn are engineered to skip right to the pleasure-seeking parts of our brain and give us a lot of exactly what we want and give it to us quickly and efficiently. As human beings, we tend to love salty and fatty foods. We love sweet stuff too. The fast food industry looks at our desires and literally creates food items in a laboratory that check all of the boxes. Crunchy, salty, fatty. It's all carefully crafted to set off signals in your brain that say, "This is awesome, and I can't wait to come back for more." Porn? Well, it's the exact same thing. It's one thing to say that porn is not great for you and watching it too much leads to bad things for men, but it doesn't get at the why it's so good in the moment. Why do millions of men come back for more and more. As I often say, there is so much free porn out there that I could attempt to watch new porn video clips every single day, and I will not run out of porn from now until the day I die. They just keep making new clips all day, every day. It's insane. What's more insane is that even with the near infinite amount of free porn, there are still millions of men dishing out millions of dollars to pay for what they deem to be special porn that's a cut above the free stuff that is so readily available. As with everything else in a capitalistic society, the population of potential customers exhibit a particular set of needs, and then the market responds accordingly. You know, it's not like a bunch of guys just got together in a conference room one day and they all decided to invent this thing called porn, and they took a gamble and they put out in the market and they just got lucky. No, they saw a need and they filled it. That's it. So let's try and analyze the why and how porn is so damn successful. Exactly what need is it filling? Can women learn something from porn? Is porn an unfiltered look into what really makes a man tick? Let's start off with item number 1. Spontaneous desire. Much like the healthy meal versus the fast food analogy, porn is a shortcut. It allows you to experience, albeit in an admittedly substandard way, the end goal of naked woman doing sexual things for me without having to go through all the trouble of approaching the pretty girl, risking the rejection, which by the way is one of the most hurtful things any man can endure, getting to know her, paying for a date or two or three, being attractive, making her feel safe, etc., etc. So it's way easier to get to the goal line with porn. But let's be honest, the goal you attain with porn doesn't in any way, shape, or form compete with the real thing. But for many men, the work needed to attain the real thing outweighs the reward. With porn, zero work is involved. So there's something to be learned here. What do men want? A man wants a woman who desires him so much that next to no work is needed to get her to take her clothes off and get busy. In other words, we want true spontaneous desire. It's every man's dream to walk into a room See a hot chick, talk to her for a minute, and leave with her and have a raunchy night of fun. That is extremely validating and intoxicating to a man. He naturally has what it takes to quickly turn a woman into a ravenous sex machine, next to no work whatsoever on his part. Yet she's crazy about him and ready to go. So what can women learn from this? Just know that anything that veers from the path of true spontaneous, genuine lustful desire is, in fact, it's a bit of a turnoff. To be madly in love with your wife only to hear, "I just can't get in the mood for that right now. You know, the kids, the work. I just need time to decompress. I'm tired. I'm stressed." Well, the old sexier version of the wife would simply look across the room at her husband and be ready to go. And the man is engineered to respond to this spontaneous desire in an extremely positive way. Many seemingly good men have dropped their frumpy wife for a young spunky thing at the office who validates the hell out of him. Do you know how those affairs start? It starts with, "Your wife is so lucky to have a guy like you." All this dude had to do was show up at the office, Sip his coffee, go to some pointless meetings, and the sexy office blonde assures him that he's amazing and rewards him with some over-the-top flirting. Next to zero effort, and Mother Nature rewards him. That is extremely appealing, if not completely addictive to men. The last item, youthfulness. This is a tough one because the insinuation is that, quote, young gals are more attractive than older gals. For the most part, yes, that is true. Sorry, us men, we just can't help it. As I've mentioned before in other articles and podcasts, there are plenty of studies and internet data available that prove again and again that men just prefer younger gals over older ones. Porn reflects this uncomfortable fact as well. A quick glance at Pornhub's front page And you can safely say that the average age of the quote models seems to be early 20s. I actually know a porn star. I went to high school with her. I didn't know about her career until I was in my early 30s and an old high school friend of mine clued me in on it. Of course, I had to go look her up online only to find a bunch of MILF and sexy stepmom videos. Due to her ripe old age of 31, she was relegated to a special section of the site set aside for those men whose tastes differ from the majority. It would seem that her age put her in a category akin to a fetish. If you are looking for a 30-something-year-old to jerk off to, well, then you must have a mommy fetish, according to these websites. And that is not nice, and it's certainly not fair to awesome older women out there. But not all is lost. What can we learn from this? Other than, you know, men are pigs and we like young, fertile women. We learned that youthfulness and femininity are not limited to the young. You can be energetic, you can be playful, fun, cute, well into your old age. You can continue to wear cute dresses that you used to wear. You can take care of yourself physically. Perfection Contrary to popular belief is not the answer. Sure, men look at a hot 20-year-old the same way we look at a pretty sunset. We admire the beauty, we gawk a little too long, but we don't mentally jump into relationship thoughts. That's just silly. That's not realistic. What is realistic is seeing your 40-something wife wearing a cute little outfit with a big smile on her face, dancing around the kitchen to her favorite song. That's insanely attractive. Because it's youthful. The opposite of that is a wife who repeatedly points out her shortcomings, complains about the kids, complains about work, complains about her husband, sits on the couch all day, taps away at her phone for hours on end, wears only sweatpants and hoodies, cuts her hair super short. She's just a blob bag of negativity that just seems to inexplicably scream, "I know that youthfulness is attractive to you, husband." 'But here, let me do the exact opposite.' Well, what does that tell the man? He is not worthy of the effort. You can't plead ignorance either, ladies, because the popularity of cosmetic surgery, photo filters, makeup, lying about your age in your online dating profiles— it all goes to prove that women are well aware of the importance of youthfulness. But for some reason, that tends to go out the window for many women when it comes to the man who matters the most, their husband.
