Episode 389: The Great Battle of the Sexes: Conflict Resolution

No need to whine, it's whiny palooza. Have some wine and join us on the whiny palooza podcast with Rebecca Greene. Welcome to the whiny palooza podcast. I'm your host, Rebecca Greene. I'm a wife, mother of 3, and licensed clinical social worker. I also have 3 fur babies at home too. My passion has always been to help children and their families. I always dreamed of being a wife and a mother. Parents are always learning through their struggles, failures, and successes and joys. I am no stranger to this wild ride of parenting, and I know behind every great parent lies a team of supportive friends and family. I want to be part of your support system. I want you to know that you are not alone. We are in this parenting world together. Join me every week for insightful discussions with experts on parenting and marriage, as well as other parents who have found the secret to successes in parenthood. You'll learn tips and tricks to make life with your family better than ever. I hope you will follow along with me while we dive into what it takes to achieve a happy family. Hello everyone, happy Whiny Palooza Wednesday!

Let's get ready to rumble!

Oh my God, I'm so tired.

Come on now.

He's loud.

What's that like?

Hi everybody, how's everyone doing? Get on here and tell us how your week is. Our topic this week is awesome. It's Battle of the Sexes. And Seth, why don't you tell them how this This topic started.

Okay, so without going into too many details, this topic started because we had a conflict in our house and I realized that men and women resolve conflict, at least in marriage, very, very differently. And this has taken me 19 years of marriage to figure out. But men resolve conflict like a hockey fight, right? You watch a hockey game, the players get into a fight. They get put in the penalty box. And then I have friends who play hockey, like 2 hours later they're at the bar drinking with the guy they just fought with, right? Or it's in a house and somebody throws a remote at somebody and then it's all good.

Nobody's throwing things, but not in our house.

Just type it.

No, I don't know that people actually throw things. Oh, can you keep your hand on my—

I was using an example because the remote example comes in later. But anyway, hockey fight, penalty box, it's over. Women do not resolve conflict that way. See, men think it's like a commercial. Conflict is a commercial break in the long story of our relationship. It's brief, it's over. Women do not work like that. So I think it's a hockey fight and she thinks it is a multi-season episode hook of a drama, right? She thinks it's Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, which I think people only watch for the fights, but she will argue with me on that in a future episode.

Why do I watch it? Tell them why I watch it.

Okay, I think that you watch it for the relationship dynamics and the fabulous trips they go on and the clothes and the jewelry and the cars and the houses. But if all you wanted was clothes, jewelry, cars, and houses, you could watch National Geographic or the Travel Channel and get the same thing with no fights. But nobody watches that. It's— they're Bravo celebrities and they fight. So you say human dynamic, I say fight.

Okay, go back to what we're doing. Go back to, um, Our topic. Our topic.

Okay, so I think there's some yelling and then it's over. And women, this is just when the conflict is getting started, right? You got the first wave of loudness, conflict, emotion out, and you're just getting warmed up. And when you get silent and stop talking, the conflict is not over. See, I've, for years I thought, oh, we're good, we're done now. And you were just getting warmed up. You were just You're shaking your head. You were just getting warmed up because you tell them your take on it.

I'll tell them my take on it. So you— so we have it out. You have it out in quotes the first time, meaning that the conflict happens. Yes.

And express how you feel.

And I was upset. Yeah. And I was upset. And I told you that I was upset.

And I said, okay.

And then you think it's over.

I do.

I think so. Tell them. Tell them what?

It is not true at all.

So tell them what? You have to go read the blog at whiningcloser.com. It's really funny. Because Seth is freaking hilarious. He handed me this paper to read. And oh my God, he makes me laugh. And here's what I want to tell you. I want to tell you, first of all, make your partner laugh. Sometimes they're not going to laugh in the middle of a conflict, but try to make them laugh because it's a great pattern interrupt. And Seth is freaking hysterical. Go read it. You're going to laugh. And write it down. If you're— we're going to talk about me, but if you're having trouble expressing yourself and you're hot or you don't know what to say or you've just shut down, try writing it down. So Seth wrote down this funny hysterical blog that I added to, so go read it. And okay, so where did you leave off?

Okay, so you've had the initial conflict out. You've expressed your negative emotion at me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think it's over. I think we're done. I heard you. I said I was sorry. Won't do it again. Learned the lesson. We're good. But this is the multi-episode saga. So it is not over. You might throw the kitchen sink at me, which comes up later. Anything else I've done wrong recently that you could throw in? Like, we had some things that weekend where I wasn't driving fast enough for you. And then when I drove faster, then you were complaining that I was driving too fast or that I took the turns too hard. It was making your car sick. And then I said, well, screw this, I'll just go outside when we get home and I'll mow the lawn. I'll do something productive. It's a household chore and she'll be happy I did that. But the grass is wet. So now the grass is sticking to everybody's shoes who goes outside and now they're getting green grass clippings all over the house. So that's season 2 of the argument after we've gotten through the eye of the storm. So guys, when you think the conflict is over, that's just where the plot twist is coming in, right? The commercial break, cliffhanger. And the rest is coming back. Women have like layers and layers and layers to the conflict, like they're peeling back a Bloomingdale onion. I got one layer, she's got like 17 more to go. So she's going to tell you about that. But guys, don't make the mistake that I made, that the first time she expresses herself, you heard her, that's enough. It's not over. Even if she's quiet and gives you the silent treatment for a day and a half after that, she's going to say it's not the silent treatment. But if you're not talking to me, it's the same thing.

I was talking to you.

You weren't talking to me about that. You were only talking to me about who gets the kids, who goes where, et cetera.

Okay. So I wanted to tell you that for season 2, when you were driving and mowing the lawn, I think at that point in time, there was nothing that you could have done right at that point in time.

See, I knew it. Thank you for admitting that on camera. I appreciate that. I was trying to do other right things to shift you, but that did not work. And now I know the secret reason why. So, okay, so why is it that there was nothing I could have done right? Because you were too busy still being upset.

Because I was cranky and upset.

Yes.

So Seth is wonderful. Before I throw Seth under the bus, yeah, so Seth is a wonderful husband, he's a wonderful father. I would like to tell you before I throw him under the bus that he took me out for lunch. So we're fine, we got through the conflict, we're fine, we resolved the next night.

24 hours later, which is good for us. Other times you have been that upset with me, it took days. So you've made awesome progress in speeding up our conflict resolution. So the delay is on you. I'm good after the first time you yell at me, but you're going to talk about why you need to yell at me more than once.

Okay, so, um, so Seth took me out for lunch and, um, I never ever in a million years would have thought of this. So my daughter Lily is on 2 cheer teams and we are in major cheer—

Competition season.

Season, like 2 teams, competitions, games, and we are just at cheerleading all the time. Just randomly, Seth got me a cheer mom necklace, which I absolutely love. I never would have thought of this. I was so surprised. He is wonderful. He does so many things right. I mean, I could tell you lists and lists of things that Seth does right. He is a great man. I picked well. However, he does do dumb stuff.

The technical social worker.

I am gonna tell you that he is a guy. And you know what? I do dumb stuff too. Like, when I was writing this blog, I was like, you know, and I'm gonna hear myself when I say this. I am going to learn from this. When I make a mistake, honey, I am sorry. I am going to work on this. When I make a mistake, which I do do, he is so kind. He is so kind. I am so hard on myself that Seth is like, honey, you are human. It is OK. Ella does the same thing. She is like, mom, you are a human. You are going to make mistakes. I'm not perfect. And when I say that Seth does dumb stuff, we all do. I don't think anyone is immune to that. So he did something that I thought was really stupid and was pissed and was floored. Seth was floored that I was pissed. I was floored that he did it.

And I didn't intend to upset you in any way, shape, or form. I thought it had nothing to do with you.

So I think that one of the things that he said that was really helpful during this fight is he sees me pissed. First of all, he feels terrible. So he did that right. He felt bad. He apologized. First, he dismissed my feelings, which don't do that. Like, none of you, anybody listening, when somebody is upset, don't dismiss their feelings. Hear them out because it's their perspective. So even if you think it's not a big deal, that doesn't mean that they don't think it's a big deal. So hear them out on why it matters to them. So, at first he dismissed my feelings, which made me upset, which he apologized for later. He realized he did that. Then he apologized and I could tell that he saw that I was pissed and was like, "Ooh, I messed up." So you could see Seth being like, "Oh, that wasn't a good move on my part." He learned from it. I know he learned from it. I wrote you an apology song. He's so sweet. I mean, he definitely apologized well. He definitely took responsibility. And what was I going to say about it though? There was something I wanted to say about what you were doing in the process. So he did a lot right. I just think that I was floored. Sometimes I'm just floored by things that he does and I want him I love when he throws things by me, like, hey, honey, yeah, like, hey, honey, what do you think about this? Okay, so like work, you know, I'm not going to give you the specifics because it's private information. But he'll be like, hey, honey, I'm thinking about doing this. And I want your thoughts on this. Like, he can't go spend a ton of money at work or at home without talking to me, like vice versa. Like, I wouldn't go— like, I just spent a ton of money on AP exams and called him.

That's education.

No, no, no, let me finish. Sorry. I called him because he was picking up Ella and I was in the middle of paying. And I was like, this is how much Max's is going to be. This is how much Ella's going to be. It's a lot of money. And I wanted approval. I'm not just going to go spend what I spent without running it by him first.

To be fair, you did. We did talk about it yesterday, about ballpark of how much it was going to be. So, and I did say, of course I would do that. It was not a surprise. Point being, you double-checked, which was very nice. Unnecessary.

I don't, but I don't want you or me to spend a lot of money without talking to each other. So that's just an example of like, just run something by the other person.

Yes. And again, I apologize.

I don't always thought it was going to cause any issues whatsoever.

I would have run it by you. I didn't, cause I didn't even fathom that anything could go wrong.

So yes, I made some things clear.

One way to describe how you communicated those things.

So I was really pissed and I definitely was passionate about my reasons why I didn't agree with Seth.

Secret to code orange, loud and intense.

Loud and intense. I don't think that I was I don't think that I was as loud as I have been.

True. I have seen you louder. It was just at a higher decibel level.

I was, you know, okay. So when you're a passionate, happy person, sometimes you're a passionate, not happy person.

Yes, it goes both ways.

So he loves when I'm passionate, happy.

Yes, very much.

He doesn't love when I'm passionate, mad at him.

Nope, definitely not.

So I was mad at him. And told him I was mad at him.

Many ways.

And then what happens to me personally is that when I'm mad at him, my emotions bubble inside of me. So I'm so angry that I get to the point, and this is poor coping skills, I'm not advising this. I get to the point where I just completely shut down. And I'm done. And I, I guess understanding myself more and reading up— I know you don't agree with astrology, Seth. So Cancer the crab, which I am, is known, as you read about it, to go hide in their shell. Yeah. So I'm hurt, I'm upset, I'm angry, so then I retreat into my shell and I'm like done. And I don't even know what to say at that point. Like, I'm just like done with the topic. I'm mad at him. I'm floored by him. And I need space. So as I analyze this pattern that I do, I'm like, okay, what can you do differently? So I think that I'm gonna, I'm gonna ask you what I could do differently, what would help you. Would it help you if I said, "My emotions are too much for me.

I need some space to decompress." Yes, but please don't use the word space.

Okay.

How about, "My emotions are too much for me. I need some time to decompress and I will be back to talk to you when I am in a more resourceful state." That would be really helpful. That would allow me to wait patiently as opposed to being scared of your silence and freaking out internally going, "Oh no, what's—" I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Well, and I think that what you can do, and I'll talk about more what I can do, is you can check in with me and not be—

I know, I thought I had to respect the silence and not talk until you came out.

No, of your show. No, you can be kind and check in with me and say, are you, are you okay? Do you, do you want to talk? Do you want, do you want time?

Like, obviously you're not okay. Obviously you're not talking, and obviously you need time or you'd be talking already. So I, I apologize. I don't think those questions are helpful to ask you when the answers are out.

Okay, so how about, how can I help? What can I do?

How about you just tell me that you need time and I will just wait and not try and keep prodding you or trying to rush you to talk.

Okay, um, I think that I can probably organize my thoughts better if, you know, when Seth handed me a letter that he had written that was hysterical. The writing, when you wrote down like what had happened and how you saw, perceived the conflict, first of all, it was super helpful because I got to see it from your point of view and you really nailed down the pattern and I could see it on paper and that was helpful for me. And I think that you inspired me because I was like, oh, if I sit down with a pen and paper and start writing stuff down, maybe that will make me feel better faster.

That is a good coping skill.

Which I think that what I'm realizing is that when I am mad at Seth, I am not having good coping skills. So then we have to find when we're doing something that's not effective, we have to find better coping strategies, better problem-solving skills, better coping strategies. So if I were to say to Seth, so are you clear on why I'm upset? Are you clear on what I don't want you to do in the future? If Seth is like, yes and yes, we've really kind of resolved that conflict. It's really not something we're going to meet in the middle on. Right. There was no gray area. It wasn't like, this is the problem, how are we going to solve it? It was like, Seth, don't do that shit. It was like obvious. I feel like it was an obvious solution. Am I wrong?

The solution, do what your wife wants or don't do what she doesn't want.

Well, this one was pretty obvious to you. Yes. Yes. I mean, do you disagree? We could talk about that?

Do I? No, I agree the solution is to not do that thing that could cause you to feel that way.

I agree with that 100%. Okay. Um, do you understand where I'm coming from, why I don't want you to do that?

Yes, I totally got that loud and very clear.

So Okay, so I think that what we have nailed down is that there are so many negative ways to handle conflict. Okay, let's go to the negative ways. So if you're doing these things, we want you to fix them, and we're going to tell you more positive ways. Okay, so I told you what Seth did right. He felt bad, and I knew that he felt bad. He learned from this. He apologized many times and he wrote me an apology, which was funny and helpful. I love that you make me laugh because laughter is one of my best medicines and you making me laugh has always worked for me. Like, it always makes things better. I will duly note that. Like, Lily and I will be fighting and she will just burst out laughing and it totally interrupts the pattern. Yes. So negative conflict resolution: name-calling, yelling, stonewalling— stonewalling is like the silent treatment— blaming others, being defensive, overgeneralizing, avoiding, interrupting. So I would say with the Overgeneralizing is like, that's also like bringing in other stuff, like kitchen-sinking it. Like Seth said to me at one point, don't kitchen-sink this. And I was like, oh, I totally— I think that when you're pissed at your partner, you start thinking of all the things that piss you off, and that is not helpful. That's just making the situation worse. That's not good That's not good conflict resolution. So, so what would be the positive conflict resolution? Listening, what you did. I don't think, I don't know that I, I did listen because you were like, I want to explain to you why I did that. Yes.

I don't know that you cared.

I didn't agree. I obviously didn't agree.

Um, empathizing. I empathize with you. You— yeah, I don't think you were giving me any empathy. You didn't. You were busy being mad.

I did empathize with you because I said to you, I totally understand that your intentions were good.

Okay, yes, you absolutely did.

Okay, staying on topic, I didn't do that. I mean, you brought me back. You brought me back. You were good at redirecting me.

Yeah, back to the one thing that you're supposed to be— that you're pissed about, as opposed to the other things you found.

Sharing. I think that keeping it inside is not going to help the situation, so you want to express yourself as calmly as possible. Yep, that'd be good. Taking responsibility for your part.

I did that.

Um, I don't I don't feel like I had any part in this situation.

Your only part was your reaction to what happened.

Yes.

You need to take responsibility for the intensity of your reaction.

I think that I have done much worse. I think I have improved.

True, but still.

I would like to say I agree with you, and I think that what I have to remember is that you hear me, you all hear me better the calmer I am. And I want to be heard. So if I want to be heard, then I turn it down. Turn it down, right? I mean, apologize, evaluating. Let's go back to evaluating.

Um, I think we've gone on a good analysis.

I think conflict— I think we do good. Like, Seth will be like, okay, can we talk about this now? Our postmortem. Yes. You move quicker through the argument. So tell me how you do that.

Well, it's easier to do when it's my fault and I'm trying to move you sooner through the intensity of your emotions to get to the other side, back to where we're good again. It's interesting, you do it to me when it's your fault. It's rare, but when I'm mad at you, you don't— I don't think that you have the same tolerance for me. You're like, are you over it yet? Whereas if I were to try and rush you through your feelings, that does not go very well. I think you expect more patience out of me than I get in return. It's also really rare that I'm mad at you, for the record.

Like, I think that if I have to be honest with that, what you just said, I think it's because I think that I do something a little wrong. She said humbly. So I think when I screw up I'm like, oh, come on. Like, how often? Oh, so you're minimizing my feelings.

I see how you are.

I do screw up sometimes. I do screw up sometimes. I just think I do less dumb shit. Like, men, I don't know. I don't know. Maybe I'm totally wrong here. I don't know. I'll have to get back to you on that.

You're going to have to do an informal survey or something.

You're going to have to tell me the last thing that I did wrong. And I'll have a better answer for you. Okay, I will be more—

So wait, is this the last thing you did wrong? Or, 'cause a lot of, some of them are what I think are overreactions to something I did by mistake, right? Is it something that you actually did wrong or is it me thinking, holy crap, I can't believe she's that upset about that thing? So if you want me to find something that was all you and I'm the one that's upset, it's gonna take me a while to remember 'cause thankfully there are very few.

I think that you're usually upset with me for how I get upset with you.

The reaction to your reaction. That is accurate.

Yes. Oh my gosh. Um, anyways, I really try to, I really try to think what I said to Seth the other day is I really try to think about how he would feel in a situation. So if I think about how Seth would feel, Seth is gonna feel in a situation, then I'm gonna have him angry less.

How did you think I felt in the situation the other day?

I don't think that you thought about my feelings with what you had done.

That's not what I was asking, but thank you for repeating that. That's—

no, that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that I think I think about you before I take actions. Okay, that's not what I'm asking. Okay, what are you asking?

How do you think I felt in your expression of how you felt about what happened?

That's what I meant. Oh, you didn't like how I expressed myself?

Oh, no, I was looking for more specific, like, what was I thinking or feeling or something?

Oh, I told you I could tell that you were floored that I was even upset with you at all. And Seth was like, this is no big deal. This is no big deal. Like, that's why I was like—

I was totally shocked. I had no clue. Like, can't believe this is happening right now. Yup.

No idea any of that was going to happen. And I realized that you were totally clueless. Like, I realized— very clueless. No, and I realized it wasn't intentional. Like, you're not ever— I've never ever tried to. And I think that one of the things that you say that is so helpful when I get mad at you is, "I am never intentionally trying to upset you." Yes. Yes, always accidental. Okay, so apologizing. Seth is so good at apologizing. I could take— I've had practice. I could take so many lessons from Seth of how to apologize. We all— we want to show our kids how important it is to apologize because if we can't apologize, then they don't learn how to apologize. And we want to apologize to each other. We want them to see that. And we want to apologize to them when we screw up. Right? Right. And just being open and honest. Like, I feel like you did a really good job at being honest with me about what was going on and all the details. Yes. And it's all good. It's okay. We're over it. It was days ago. But seeing Seth write down on paper exactly what the pattern is was so helpful. And we can't change anything if we don't identify the pattern. So then I see, okay, you're starting to shut down. So what are you going to do differently this time so that you don't retreat? And then I need to take actions for myself. So you have to figure out for yourself, okay, what are my negative patterns in this conflict? Do I get aloof? Do I walk away? You know, I don't like the whole walking away thing, the whole, you know, there's a pursuer-distancer pattern that happens where one is distancing and one is pursuing, and you want to get out of those patterns and you can't get out of those patterns if you don't identify them. So you have to focus on yourself and what do I do in the pattern? What is my part that I could change? Because when one person changes, the whole dance changes. So we tend to follow each other. Yes. Right? So tell me your best advice for the next time that my feelings are bubbling over and I start to shut down? Just announce it. Well, I don't think that's the solution, but—

Oh, breathe, relax, know it's going to be okay. What do you want to feel in this situation? What's going to help you move forward and get a satisfactory resolution? If you focus on where you're trying to get to, you'll feel differently than if you focus on why you're upset.

Okay. You're fucking feeling upset. Okay, so if I'm upset, so you're like, okay, I'm going to use this example. You've apologized. You feel bad. You said, I won't do that again. Right. Done. Okay, so then if I'm sweet—

when is the second half of the season, by the way?

Second half of what?

What season? Cobra Kai. That's from Karate Kid.

So, okay, so you, you've apologized. Yes. You feel terrible. Yes. I know you feel terrible. And you said that you're not gonna do it again. Aren't we, aren't we solved? So shouldn't I feel resolved? Yes, but I don't know. So I'm pissed that you— I'm still pissed that you did it.

So even though you apologize, but you're choosing to stay focused on what went wrong and you're choosing to stay pissed as opposed to focusing on Oh, my wonderful husband apologized, he's learned, good, we can move on.

And I think that, okay, so go back to you. When I make a mistake, which I've done, you are very kind and helpful and sweet. Way nicer to you. You are. So why is that? So I can learn from you.

Um, it's not that big a deal. Um, I know you're gonna beat yourself up. I know that you beat yourself up more than I ever could. Or would want to. So you've probably already beating yourself up, and I know that you feel bad. So if we just, we just move forward. I think you don't know, even though I've told you that I am also beating myself up about what happened, and therefore sometimes I get asked if I'm being defensive. You just think, well, he doesn't get it enough, he's not upset, and he doesn't feel bad enough, I gotta make him feel worse so he really, really gets this. Because you don't know what's going on in my head. And if you did, you'd be like, oh, okay, we're good. I can leave him alone.

I don't have to make it feel any worse. So if I don't feel bad, if I make a mistake and I'm like, eh, like—

Yeah, that would piss me off more because that's you minimizing my feelings, right?

Okay, so no, let's use the car incident. Um, I had an, um, I don't know, an accident, would you call it? I had like a minor accident in the Wegmans Plaza like years ago. Yes. Was it a couple years ago? It just, it wasn't a good situation in the parking lot. I've had, I've had a few situations in the parking lot and avoided the Wegmans parking lot. Parking lots in general, just be careful, people. People coming from all directions, and I'm trying, and I'm, and I'm trying to avoid one person, hit another person. Let's just say it was a scrape on my car and his car. And I come home and I'm upset that I did this. Like, it's gonna cost us money, and I don't ever want to cost us money for a mistake like this. I mean, I'm glad I'm okay, but anyways, what if I came home— so I was upset and you were so sweet and kind. Yes. What if I came home and I was like, whatever, I hit a car, no big deal? Like, what if I didn't care?

Um, I don't know that that's the best example. I might— I mean, I don't know if you didn't care at all, like, I'm gonna go hit somebody else tomorrow, we'd have a problem.

I mean, it's just a mistake that I made that I— I don't like that.

I don't— I apologize. I don't like that example. To me, doesn't work because it was honestly an accident and it wasn't a big deal. Everybody was okay. Um, but it costs us money. Okay, you need to pick one that was like you did something to me and you don't feel bad about, and then I would be mad that you didn't feel bad.

Okay, so I think that the bottom line, what we got to today— yes, in our therapy session— yes, is that I feel so bad when I mess up. Yes, that is why you are so kind to me. So I need to realize that you feel really bad. Yes, and give you the same kindness in return.

Awesome.

And hopefully that won't be for another long time. Okay, so the next time Seth messes up— so here's what I want to tell everybody. There is supposed to be conflict in your marriage, in your relationship. If you are not having conflict, somebody's stuffing stuff. You're stuffing, you're stuffing, you're avoiding, you're, you're not talking about things, you're not being honest with yourself. Stuff is gonna— I mean, you live together, it's been 20 years, shit's gonna happen. Yes. And as my mom says, stuff happens. It's just part of life. So we know that stuff is gonna happen. And hopefully the next time something happens, I— my goal is to get through it in a quicker manner. And not shut down in the process.

No need to rush, but I love the not shut down part.

And be as kind to you when you mess up as you are to me when I mess up. I would love that. So I'm sorry I'm so hard on you. Seth will say to me, uh, you expect me to be like this perfect person, and I think that I think that what I have said to him is he's so wonderful, that he's such a good husband, that I hold him to that standard.

So what you're saying is I need to lower the bar and screw up a lot more often so it's less of a big deal.

No, absolutely not. You're so wonderful 99% of the time. 1% of the time you do something stupid and your wife gets pissed. That is, it's gonna, it's gonna happen. Yes. So in your marriage, in your conflict, we would love to hear from you. What's the pattern? What are you working on? And did we say anything that's going to help you? We hope so. We hope that we entertain you, and we hope that you— edutainment, entertainment, education, good times, good times.

So You have a podcast.

I have a podcast on Friday. I spoke to Ellen Schutt and the title is What Drives You. So she was very fun and informative to talk to. You're going to love her. And come join me on Facebook in the Wine Inclusive Mom group. And it's just a supportive, wonderful community that I enjoy, that I hope everybody in it is enjoying. And, um, join the newsletter. How do they join the newsletter?

Go to whinyblueser.com, go to the Linktree that has all of Rebecca's resources, including the newsletter that comes out 3 times a week. And make sure you like, share, rate, review, and subscribe. Oh my gosh.

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iTunes, Google Play, Spotify, Stitcher, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Amazon Audible, Pandora—

What is the purple one that I like? Is that Apple? I don't know what it is. I just hit the purple button and listen to podcasts.

I'm sure Apple's very happy about that.

Apple, I love you and all your podcasts. Hit rate and review because the more ratings that you get, the more people that they send your podcast out, and it helps me. And I love when you like and comment on stuff because then Facebook shares it, shares it, it gets out to more people. Yes. And share this with somebody who you think has a relationship, wants a relationship, could use a good laugh and some lessons on conflict resolution. And I just appreciate you joining us. And, uh, good topic, Seth. Thank you very much. Seth started— I'm sorry that we had a fight. Yes. Yes, but I love that you wrote about it and made me laugh. I think that's great. Awesome. Okay, we will be back next week with a new topic. Feel free to send me your topic requests. Happy Winey Palooza Wednesday. Thank you for tuning in to the Winey Palooza podcast. If you like what you heard, please be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode. While you are there, leave a review. I love to hear your feedback. Thank you so much for listening. Until next time. This show has been produced by Market Domination LLC.

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