Achieving Your Dreams and Creating the Life You Want

People are want to achieve something. People want to achieve their chase their dream. A lot of times people are going through life and in their late teens, early 20s, they have an idea, they want to do this, they want to do that. But then the real world kicks in and they always put their dreams on the back burner. Let's talk about being able to put the dreams on the front burner but still be able to handle your adult responsibilities.

You've got to stay committed through the moments that nobody else understands what you're doing or why you're doing it, through the moments where you no longer understand why you're doing what you're doing. And just know that if you have the dream, you have what it takes to create it.

Mix with a 2.5 the best mix from the 90s to now. Big pop in the afternoon on a mental wellness Wednesday with life Coach Rebecca Silence. RebeccaSilence.com and a published author Coming back to life. Let's see if we can get that right up on there. I don't want to get the. There it is. Yeah. Coming back to life.

You have your copy?

A roadmap to healing from pain to create the life that you want. Right here. Congratulations on this. How's the response been since it's been out for the week?

Wild. I mean it feels surreal. The book is out there. There's no turning back. It's, it's actually right now, this week getting pitched at the international Frankfurt Germany Book Festival. This is beyond a dream come true. And everyone that has let me know that they have the book and they're reading it, the response is that it's so moving, it's so vulnerable, it's so touching and it's helping them connect dots that they didn't even know weren't connected or needing to be connected. You know, my mother in law that I love so much in her 80s is saying, Rebecca, I had so many stories that I thought were put to bed and apparently they're not. But this book is going to help me put them to bed. Like that is music to my ears. And I'm getting equally moved responses from men and women, which also touches me. A friend of ours, this sweet man that's a neighbor is reading the book and said just how emotional it's been for him but in the best way. And that's what I want. I want people to have a new non threatening experience of their past, of their story, of their emotions. And I want people free.

You have somebody pitching it at the Frankfurt Germany Book Festival. Is that what you said.

Right. So I am so grateful to have an amazing publisher backing me. And because I have a traditional publishing deal, the publisher is responsible for the public relations and the marketing and the press, and they are just doing an extraordinary job. And, man, am I grateful to you and all of our years on radio because I'm doing multiple interviews a day, and it's just a breeze and it's a blast. At least that isn't new to me.

Well, if it makes you feel any better, back home, I pitched it to the Frankfurt New York Book Club. If you want details. Of course, Coming Back to Life is available wherever you get your books and details. Rebecca. Silence.com. so we're talking a lot about a goal and something very cool that's going on in your world. So I want to transition that into if people are. Want to achieve something, people want to achieve their chase their dream. A lot of times people are going through life and in their late teens, early 20s, they have an idea, they want to do this, they want to do that. But then the real world kicks in, and they always put their dreams on the back burner. Let's talk about being able to put the dreams on the front burner, but still be able to handle your adult responsibilities.

I love this conversation. So the first thing I want to say is let's switch the narrative from chase your dreams to create the reality you want, right? Because these dreams are realities that we want to be our everyday experience. That's the point, right, of having a dream. It's how we want our life to be. It's what we want to be a part of our life. And commitment. It's a really interesting conversation, right? Because the way to no longer have it be a dream and now have it be your reality, whatever it is, the salary you want, the career you want, the relationship you want, whatever it is the book you want to write. It's about knowing how to stay committed through the moments where you want to quit or give up or it doesn't seem worth it. And my book definitely gives people a new way to commit to themselves into what honestly sets their soul on fire, right? So, you know, you've got to stay committed through the moments that nobody else understands what you're doing or why you're doing it, through the moments where you no longer understand why you're doing what you're doing. And just know that if you have the dream, you have what it takes to create it. This book took me four years. This book took everything in me. I just listened to the Two minute audio sample. There's also an audiobook, and I got to pick the narrator. She immediately, immediately wrote to me how moved she was by the book. I had no idea how emotional it would be for me hearing my words through someone else's voice. All I heard was two minutes. And I just. I was breathless and I was moved beyond words. And I thought about everything it took to stay committed, to risk putting my heart in my hands and giving it to all of you. To risk the reactions from family that would much rather, I noticed, be so public or loud about who I am and where I come from. The list goes on. But the point is, do it for you, not for the reaction you hope to get from other people. I wrote this book for me. This book brought me back to life. As much as I hope it brings you back to life, this book allowed me to leave shame and guilt and the fears about who I am. Because of what I have faced completely in my past and in my dust, I am free in a way I didn't even know was was possible because I made my dream come true and I didn't settle. That's the other thing I want to say here, right? Like, it's easy to cut corners and to create an experience of almost having what we want isn't almost enough. Well, I'm going to say no. You know, go for it until your dream is what you imagined it could be. And the way I think about it is commitment is a whatever it take, as long as it takes process. And if you're not committed to something that you're willing to go all in, whatever it takes, as long as it takes, pick something else to pursue. Right? I mean, my marriage isn't as long as it's still convenient, I'm in the game. We've been through the loss of my husband's company, bankruptcies, cancer, so much. And if we were just as long as it feels good and easy and convenient, we'll stay committed. We'd be divorced. I mean, period, end of story. If I, every time I got confronted or triggered or nervous about my book, gave that power and energy, I wouldn't have finished the book. And I was told, even by mentors of mine, you're not a writer. Nobody does well on their first book, things like that. And I had to decide, just like when my doctors were telling me, you're dying of cancer and your chances aren't good and if you quit chemo, you're definitely going to die. I had to listen to me. So my book will help you Uncover the truth about who you really are and what you really want. And it will give you my tried and true methods. And the methods that have worked for hundreds, if not at least a thousand clients at this point to help them create exactly what they wanted. And I've never had a client in my private practice not get what they came to me for. Never once in 15 years. And it's about changing the mindset from this is a dream that's far away or outside of me to I have everything it takes in me. And it's just about whether or not I'm going to have the courage to commit until I cross the finish line. And we all have the courage in us already. It's not a new. It's not a new skill to learn. It's just about learning how to connect to your courage again, learning how to relax into your power so you're not afraid of it. And that's the biggest thing that I think stops people from their dreams that we don't talk about. It makes us powerful when we create our dreams. And a lot of the time we don't want to be seen as too powerful because we don't know what that will mean for our life or our relationship. But I want us having our power turned all the way on and our courage. And that's how we begin to enjoy life. Which is the point. The point of healing isn't to re traumatize you. It's to get to the place where nothing hurts anymore and you're not threatened and you're free.

So one of the things that I want to bring to light is it's not like you have created what you wanted overnight. It's been, it's been, it's been a long process and I've been lucky enough to be a part of that with you throughout the, throughout the entire process from before, you know, as you started the business all the way up until now. I want to talk about the day to day because trying to achieve something, and you're going to achieve something, but you also have to live your life and take care of your responsibilities, take care of your kids. You still have to, you know, hold down, you know, still have to make money and take care of, you know, the household while still pursuing this and that for the long game. It, you know, in the short term, it gets really, really, it can get frustrating. And so what, what's a good way to kind of help in the short term go towards these long term goals? Does that make sense?

Absolutely. And I'm glad you brought this back around because it isn't either or. Either your dreams or your responsibilities. Your responsibilities are the foundation. But again, if we think about it like this is what I have to do, that can put a lot of pressure on you as you want to pursue your dreams. So it isn't either or. And you get to be the person that is capable because you are capable of meeting the responsibilities while you build the life you want. That's the secret magic sauce formula to be meeting your responsibilities, pursuing your responsibilities while you pursue your dreams, because that's the life you deserve. It is more than survival that we are destined for. In my book and my course the Emotional Survival Kit, they're about learning how to break up with survival and the day to day grind and just managing our way through our lives because of our past. What is also available is a life where you're fulfilled in everything you do. It's because you powerfully choose it and it's because you want it. You know, I'm cleaning up the kitchen this morning. I get to do that. I'm, you know, working out. Right before this segment I was having a parenting conversation with my husband. These are responsibilities that are a joy and a gift and that I am blessed to be able to experience and be the person that handles. But I also get to have my dreams. So I am a big, big, big proponent of blocking out your time. And that's maybe another show in the future in and of itself. But I pick the five to six big priorities, big ways I like to spend my time, Self care, interviews, content creation, coaching, friends, family, family, social life, whatever your big priorities are. Are you looking at the week ahead in your calendar and blocking out time to make it all happen? If you're reinventing the wheel every single day, trying to wing it, you are just going to be scrambling and operating reactively which will drain you. But if you know what your priorities are and you build your life around making sure those priorities get nurtured and you have time for them, there's nothing that can stop you and that is available to you. And remember, you're living how you're living and you get to live how you want to be living. So if those two things are different, it's time to close the gap.

The Emotional Survival Kit is available right now@rebeccasilence.com the book coming Back to Life is available wherever you get your books. Even the audio version is there as well. Life coach Rebecca Silence, Always a pleasure. Congratulations on the book and we'll talk.

To you next week. Love you all. Thanks for listening. Enjoy coming back to life. I can't wait for you to read or listen to it.