Rebeccah Silence answers a parent worried that taking personal time makes them selfish. She says good parenting and self-care go together, then gives one concrete tool: list 50 things that inspire you and do one each day, even for five minutes.
Questions this video answers
Make a list of 50 things that inspire you, and on a daily basis do one of them (even for five minutes).
inspiredresultscoach.com (and Inspired Results LLC on Facebook).
cnykiss.com
Welcome to the song that's gonna be stuck in your head for the rest of the day.
Yeah.
For real, though, It's Kyle, I spy 9791055 Kiss FM. Big Papa and Liz.
And in studio, it's a Tuesday, which means it's Confession Tuesday. Local life coach Rebecca Silence is in.
Hello.
Good morning.
So inspiredresultscoach.com is the website and how we roll on a confession Tuesdays. You can go to cnykiss.com There's a backlog of. Of past segments of Rebecca helping listeners. Just like you get through whatever is going on in your world, it sometimes has you at a loss and not quite sure how to handle things. Are you ready for this week's. This week's question?
Yes.
All right, here we go. Dear Rebecca, how do they do it? How do parents do so much and still have time to actually be parents? I have two beautiful, amazing little girls under the age of four and. And I see all these people who have kids on Facebook and Instagram doing all these cool things and enjoying their life and going to concerts and vacations. Hell, just going to happy hour on a Friday would be amazing, but I just don't know how I can and still be a good mommy. Please help.
Oh, my goodness. Yeah. I'm sure that you have so many people right now turning up the volume on the radio because they can relate to what you're going through. I am a parent myself, and it's really important to think about, you know, when we become parents, what do we think that's going to mean? It's really easy to unconsciously think that being a parent is gonna go a certain way or marriage is gonna go a certain way or being an adult is gonna go a certain way without checking in with yourself to see whether or not the way you think it's gonna go is. Is what you want.
Okay.
Right. So just because you're a parent does not mean that your needs have to come last now for the rest of your adult life. Just because you're a parent doesn't mean it's a bad thing if you take care of yourself and have some fun. But somewhere along the line, maybe you saw that modeled for you or decided that being a parent meant you're not going to have fun anymore as an individual. And what if that doesn't have to be the case? So my recommendation to all parents is that you make sure that you are fulfilled and happy and solid in your life, number one priority. That's the best parenting that you can do. It doesn't mean you won't take out time to nurture your relationship with your kids or be their mommy. But if they just see you going through the day to day grind exhausted and unhappy, that's not making adulthood or parenting look very attractive.
Right.
So it's super important for you to look at. Okay. How is my life set up right now? And where could I build in room for more fun? Right. We build time into our schedules for exercise. We build time into our schedules for work and making money. Why not also prioritize building time into our schedules for making sure that we're doing things that inspire us?
What is the best way to kind of do that? It sounds like that's where, you know what, that's where the speed bump is with this.
Yeah. So, you know, consider the possibility that you're allowed to have some me time and a great homework assignment that I would recommend that you do is make a list of 50 things that inspire you.
Okay.
And then on a daily basis do one of them. So you're gonna make a list of 50 things that inspire you. And you know, I mean, before you had kids, when you were younger, when what did you enjoy? And I really think, yeah, but a nap, A good nap. I mean, why not? Why not? It's so important to give yourself permission to recharge your batteries. And I will say this, that when people hit it in conflict, you can pretty much guarantee that they wouldn't be fighting if their needs were taken care of. And if they were solid, it's because we get to the point where we're running on fumes and depleted and exhausted and. And then we're more available for fighting because we're tired of being sick and tired. So why not?
In other words, take care of yourself. And if you're able to do something that you want to do, you'll actually be a better parent on the back end because you're in a better place.
Right.
And is what you're saying, I'm also.
Suggesting be careful what you want to be right about. Right. Like, why be right about the fact that, you know, because of a mom. I'm a mom. I don't have time for me. And here's the thing. You're already farther along than you believe because you're seeing that it's possible for other people.
Right.
So that's what you said in your letter, that I see other people doing these things. Why can't I? Number one first step to creating inspired results is being aware that it's a possibility. So you're already there, you see that it's possible for somebody else. So the good news is that we all have access to the same abundance and possibility. If other people can have it, so can you. So there's just some beliefs or blocks in the way of you manifesting this possibility for yourself. So that's good news. And then I would just highly encourage you to start by making A list of 50 things that excite you or that you enjoy or that inspire you. And then just every day, try to do one, even if it's five minutes of yoga at sunrise, you know? But if you're not making it a priority for you to have fun and fulfillment, the world won't either. So you get in charge of that. You do not need permission to enjoy your life. And your kids deserve to have a mom who really loves her life and has time for herself and is fulfilled so that she models that for her kids as well.
Life coach Rebecca Silence Inspired Results. Coach.com is the website Inspired Results LLC on Facebook. If you would like Rebecca to answer your question next week, all you have to do is go to cnykiss.com or shoot her a message on Facebook or on her website and we'll handle it here confidentially. On the air.
Yeah.
Have a great day.
It's so important to when you're in a funk, find something that inspires you.
And if it's a funk, it may be George Clinton to get you out of that funk. Cause we want the funk dancing? We got the funk? We got the funk Confession Tuesday.
