Rebeccah Silence, Liz, and Big Papa discuss how new business owners with social anxiety can network without draining themselves. They explore introversion, extroversion, and ways to build a business while respecting your own energy limits.
9, 7 9, 1055 Kiss FM. It's Liz and big Papa. It's a confession Tuesday. And in studio we have local life coach Rebecca. Silence.
Good morning. So here's how we roll on a confession Tuesday. Of course, Rebecca. The best way to get a hold of her is inspired results coach.com whether it be individual couple, family, children, business, your organization, or. Or the highly coveted escape weekends that are just absolutely incredible. They're all highlighted and detailed atinspired results coach.com but what we do here on Tuesday mornings, we take your emails and Rebecca handles them live on air and does coaching right here on air. We do it confidentially, but just with her helping someone, it ends up helping so many more. So are you ready for this week's question?
I am. What do we have?
All right. Dear Rebecca, I hate social situations. I hate going out. I hate small talk. I get anxiety about all of that. Yes, here's my problem. I'm in the process of starting and building my own business, and I know that networking is very important to the success of my business. Is there a way to network without doing all that social stuff? And if there isn't, do you have any tips to not make the social stuff not be as terrible?
Oh, my goodness. I love this question. And I laughing because Liz is acting like she agrees with it. It's a mayor's ball. I saw you minkling your sweet little face off.
Her social interaction was powered by Utica Club. Yeah.
She saw that too.
So here's my point. There's, I think, freedom in being at choice, in the decision. Right. Like you chose to get dressed up and go to the mayor's ball.
Yes.
Right. So there's some freedom in that. They can hopefully relieve some of the anxiety. But here's the deal. I've actually had several clients over the years that are introverts that have come into the office feeling like that is a fault. And I'm telling them, go research, introvert. It's just about understanding more who you are. So here's my quick differentiation between extrovert and introvert.
Okay.
Introverts basically recharge their batteries and get themselves filled back up to 100% capacity alone.
Okay.
Extroverts recharge their baddies, their batteries, their bodies by being in a group. So introverts recharge alone. Extroverts recharge with other people. So it's like energizing for the extrovert to be in a group, whereas an introvert, it's energetically depleting.
Okay.
So that's just who you are. There's nothing wrong with that. I'm somebody, believe it or not, that is introverted. So I would much rather do one on one with people. And I need quality time to myself to recharge. I used to think I was an extrovert just because I could mingle, but then I'd be tired and I'd need to recharge. So it doesn't matter whether or not you're an introvert or an extrovert. And then as far as your business goes, just pick things that you really want to be a part of. Never from a place of, this is what I have to do. And that goes for all of us in any area of our lives. If we're doing something because we should or because we have to and we're gonna resent it and it's gonna exhaust us. It'll just blow up later, and you'll have cleanup work to do.
Okay?
So go to the events that you want to, and then consider that maybe the face of your business doesn't have to be you.
Oh, that's true, though, right?
Because in all teams, there's that performer type personality, and then there's like, the leader from behind that takes on the details. There's the person that's kind of coming up with the vision. And then in really good teams, there's somebody doing quality assurance and be paying attention to which of those are your strengths. Are you the performer? Are you the detail person? Are you more the visionary? Are you the one wanting to do quality assurance? And with me and my small group, I am definitely more the visionary in the performer. So I only hire people that do the details and the quality assurance. The opposite of me. Right? So the yin to the yang. Right? All teams need that balance. And then maybe you're not the performer. Maybe you're the brains behind the operation, and you put somebody else out front to represent the company and be the one that is now the face of the organization and at the networking events.
So maybe you're the brain and you need to find your pinky. Pinky and the brain.
Oh, my goodness. I was like, what is he talking about? Right?
The cartoon?
Yes. Yeah.
Okay.
All right.
I get what you mean.
Now. I just want to talk about running a new business on another level because it is something that a lot of people want to do. And I tell people when they come into my office, I hate my job. I need to quit and start my own thing. Starting your own thing won't be easier. It will not be easier. By any stretch of the imagination. Because there is no calling in sick. There is no, you know, I don't feel like it today.
It's something you have to have a passion for, otherwise it's going to consume you.
So here's the thing. I just want to say to this person writing in. You obviously care about and are passionate about what you're doing or you wouldn't have written us this email. And just know that there are days that are going to be harder than others. But get yourself supported and not necessarily with the people you think should support you. I've talked about how when I first started inspired results, my friends and family, including my husband, had a lot of questions about that. Do we really think this is.
You got a lot of static because you had a full time job and when you quit that full time job for inspired results, you got a lot of static.
I sure did. But I saw it. I could see it, I could taste it. I knew that this business was gonna make a difference in the community. And so I want you to have people in your inner circle. Gary was instrumental in mine. Just kind of cheering you on and going, you know what? I'm here with you. I see it too. Good job. You need that type of support when you have the hard days. I surround myself with entrepreneurs and we have great conversations about how one day it feels like everything is going great and then another day, oh my God, you know, is everything falling apart? And that's just part of the deal. But know your strengths. Know that you don't have to do anything. Google introvert versus extrovert. Either way, there's nothing wrong with you. And I really think the anxiety comes from fear that it's not gonna work out. Fear about putting yourself out there, putting yourself in positions that you don't actually wanna be in, and all of those things are optional.
Life coach Rebecca. Silence.
And congratulations on your business. Go get it.
InspiredResultsCoach.com here's what I've learned today.
What?
Okay. I've learned that I am an introvert with an extrovert's job.
Yeah.
You know what I mean. You're an introvert. No way.
Absolutely. I totally see that about him.
I don't think so.
Remember, Liz, it's about, where do you recharge?
I guess it's true.
I recharge by not answering anybody, turning off my phone and sleeping for a day and a half. That's my recharge. That's so introvert with an extrovert's job.
Same.
Oh, what did I do.
Geez.
Free 5-Day Live Online Bootcamp for Mothers, August 24–28 4 PM EST. Replays available #shorts
