Local radio segment (Confession Tuesday) featuring life coach Rebeccah (Rebeccah) Silence discussing coping strategies during flooding and a state of emergency in Herkimer County (early July 2013). The conversation covers: recognizing what you can control vs. others' actions vs. 'God's business' (framework inspired by Byron Katie); practical self-care (sleep, eating, breathing); asking for and offering support vs. seeking rescue; using crisis as opportunity for growth and leadership; and a community call-to-action (help others, contact info for the coach and station).
If you're down in Herkimer county, obviously there's flooding all over the place. Because of yesterday's storm, last night's storm, Herkimer county has been in a state of emergency. There was a travel ban in Herkimer county, according to WKTV's Facebook, that has been lifted. However, they ask that for no unnecessary travel and to please be careful. And here's the deal. Just because the ban is lifted doesn't mean that all the roads are open, because that's definitely not the case. So there are some people that just can't get to where they want to go today. That's just. That is the deal. Some, some people are just stuck because they just, they just can't get out. So just know that. Don't go anywhere if you don't have to. I know there are a lot of people without power. A big thank you to, you know, everyone who's been working the overtime, everyone who's been, you know, doing, just volunteering their time and helping to sub pump people out and trying to help with the cleanup and trying to keep a handle on everything because it just feel, especially last night, it just had to have felt like it wasn't going to end. And you know, the fact that it's going to rain again today, just. So with that being said, it is a confession. Tuesday, local life coach Rebecca Silence is in studio. And. And Rebecca is a life coach. It is all about helping you getting out of your way. And Rebecca, good morning.
Good morning.
Kind of unusual circumstances with everything that's going on, weather wise and whatnot. When it comes to times like this and if you are in this situation, it's very easy to freak out. Yeah, I mean, that's the best way I could put it. It's very easy to. It's a very easy thing to, to freak out and think that it's never going to end. And it's very hard to keep a straight head and to keep focused on, okay, how can we just get, you know, kind of plow through, whatever. And I use the. I'm struggling for words right now, but how you plow through. Okay, this is the situation. Here's what we have to do to get everything cleaned up and da da da da da da da da da da. Especially when there's situations where you have to rely on other people. You have to rely on the power getting turned back on. You have to rely on people, you know, having dumpsters and stuff to put the garbage in and stuff. It's gotta be tough to maintain Levelheadedness at certain points.
Yeah. So you're talking about how do you deal with a crisis?
Yeah.
And Byron, Katie does work that I think is really helpful in cases of crisis. She says that there are three types of business. There's my business, which is what I actually have control over. And in a crisis, it's easy to forget that there's still a lot I have control over. So we do, even in a crisis, still have control over quite a bit. We have control over our thinking, we have control over our communication. We have control over. Over whether or not we're eating well, sleeping well, taking deep breaths, you know, doing what we need to decompress. Even in a crisis, it is absolutely easy to just freak out, hit drama and go into a tailspin. However, Byron, Katie always ask the question, is what you're doing bringing you more peace or stress? So if you're ever doing anything that's bringing you stress, there's something in your control over. You can do. The other business is other people's business. So you might be around people in a crisis who are handling the situation in a way you don't agree with. It's not my business.
Right.
You can just focus on you. So other people's business is how they react, how they communicate their opinions, their strategies for dealing. Totally not on anybody but them. Right. So then she calls it God's business. I'm not preaching religion, but what that implies is that there's just something bigger than us, like the reason for the floods and, you know, something makes the sunrise and sunset. There's something bigger than us out there. So the way I look at situations like this is it falls under the God's business category when things like this happen. So, you know, there are messages in everything. And what I mean by a message, it's like a sign so I can find a message for me. And if I don't, if I don't see, what's the lesson here? What's the message? It can become a problem. If I don't get the problem level of the message, then I can get a crisis. So there's always something to learn and some way I can grow in these situations.
Sure.
This is not the conventional way to look at this. I realize that it doesn't say that the situation is good or awesome, but it is what it is. So I can either make myself smaller and suffer my way through a crisis, or I have an opportunity to step into leadership, to see a stronger side of myself than maybe I even knew was there. It absolutely is A time. I love what you were saying about how in these situations, we do need support. We absolutely need support. You can't go through it alone. So that can be a message in and of itself that, all right, I don't like asking for support. Now I'm forced to, so that's awesome. If you need support, use it. Absolutely. And the difference between support and a rescue is when I'm using support or asking for support, I'm giving you permission to come have my back.
You know, it's. There's a lot of pride in.
Right.
There's a lot. The central New York is very giving, and there's also a lot of pride, which is funny, because sometimes you need to get out of your comfort zone a little bit. There are people that are willing to help right here.
Yeah.
Right now, don't have to work today. And, you know, what can I do? And don't know where to go and what to do and how to help.
And if you don't ask for support, if you don't say you need it, no one's gonna know.
Right.
Right. So it's important to put it out there, and it isn't something that makes you weak. Asking for support, in my experience, means that I'm strong enough to know where I need a little help.
Yeah.
It isn't weak at all in my experience. It's actually weak to stick your hand in the head, in the sand, pretend you're okay if you're not.
No, everything's good. I got this. No, it's. It's fine.
It takes a lot of courage and a lot of strength to ask for support, as well as to be there offering support. You know, I know you've got something really great going on tomorrow night to try to be supportive to all the flood victims. I love that. And, you know, it's a time where people can come together and remember that it really is all about connection. It really is all about relationships. So you have an opportunity to ask for support, to be support, to really appreciate the people in your life that you love. When situations like this happen, you know, it all comes back to what is the priority. We have an opportunity to make a difference every day. It's unfortunate that sometimes it takes a situation like this to remind us of that, but I'll take it. You know, if we need stuff like this, just to remember that we're a community and we can love each other and support each other, great. Let's. Let's use that. Let's use this experience as an opportunity for all of us to grow and come together versus an opportunity for all of us to, you know, complain and fall apart.
You realize some there's a couple people that are cussing you out right now, being like, yeah, uses it come. You know, yeah, my basement's flooded. And I can completely sympathize and understand that because there's a lot of people going through a lot of stuff.
But what can you do? You could say, yes, my basement's flooded. Poor me, and it's still flooded. So do you want to benefit from this experience or do you want to just feel sorry for yourself? You can cuss me out all you want. I just want to give you something to think about, you know? And I've had tragedies. I was assaulted in the middle of the night once by a manager of a hotel. And that tragedy, that crisis, I swear to God, it saved my life. If that hadn't have happened to me, I would have never woken up to this work. I would have never stepped into leadership in my life. So I embrace these situations because I've been through crisis and it saved me. So I'm not saying that anyone out there needs to be saved, but what I'm saying is that you're stronger than you know. So instead of wanting a rescue from your situation, what. What if you took on leadership in your own life and grew from your circumstance?
This microphone, I'm gonna. I swear to God. And there is a. There is a difference between being rescued and being strong enough to know that you need help. There is a difference, right?
We can be in leadership asking for support, or we can be victims fishing for a rescue.
Local life coach Rebecca Silence it is inspired results coach.com so here's homework. Yes.
Help somebody today that you have permission to help. You know, you can. You can ask, you can say, how can I support you? But do something to make a difference in someone's life today. Why not? And then we would love your emails to tell us what happened.
Bigpapacnykiss.com Local life coach Rebecca Silence inspired results coach.com More on a Confession Tuesday coming up next here on KISS fm.
