Life coach Rebeccah Silence (podcast/YouTube segment) offers parents practical strategies for reducing kids' screen-time during vacation by prioritizing emotional connection over rules. Core advice: ask each child three questions — (1) what do you want to happen this week, (2) how are you doing, and (3) how do you feel about our relationship — to surface priorities and invite honest communication. She emphasizes partnering with kids (share parents' availability and requests), using quality time and simple, budget-friendly activities to engage children, and reminds parents to resist social-media comparisons by choosing meaningful, affordable weekly highlights and modeling fun and vulnerability.
It's the week of vacation for the kids. I don't know if it's the same out in Colorado, but it is here. What I want to talk about is strategies for parents to help with the kids not be stuck in their room on their tablets the entire week.
I can't recommend enough using that as a time to ask your kids three questions. The first is what's important to you now? So. So when it comes to vacation, what's one thing each child wants to have happen that week?
Mix order 2.5. The best mix from the 90s to now. Big Papa in the afternoon. It is a mental wellness Wednesday. Life coach Rebecca Silence Tougher Together a breakthrough podcast. RebeccaSilence.com Rebecca, how are you?
Very well. So happy to be here. Hi, everybody.
So it's the week of vacation for the kids. I don't know if it's the same out in Colorado, but it. But it is here. What I want to talk about is strategies for parents to help with the kids not be stuck in their room on their tablets the entire week. Because that's something that a lot of parents are battling right now for sure.
I mean, this is same old Rebecca silence advice, but I don't think it hurts to hear it again, even if you've heard it before and maybe, maybe you haven't heard it yet at all. But every break vacation transition opportunity, I can't recommend enough using that as a time to ask your kids three questions. The first is what's important to you now? So when it comes to vacation, what's one thing each child wants to have happen that week? Obviously, you know, if they're saying like a trip to Disney or something crazy, we're talking reasonable, doable. But what's something we locally or in the budget that's important to you this week? Ask them that. First, that they want to do. What's something important that you want to do? Second thing is just what's important to you in general, like, how are you doing? Use the opportunity to create connection, to understand where your child is. Because especially for kids, whether they're elementary school, I have a first grader or high school, I also have a junior. Their priorities shift so fast, what's important to them shifts so fast. What friends they have, you know, relationships with significant, you know, others in whatever grade they're in. It all happens so fast. So what's one thing that's important to you to do this week? Just how are you and what's important to you now? And then, I swear, this is maybe a Challenging question, but ask anyway and just see how it goes. How are you feeling about our relationship? Ask your child to answer honestly and say you're not going to get in trouble. Whatever you say. I really want to know your world, your experience. How are you feeling about our relationship right now? What do you think is working? What could make it better for you? You know, my oldest, 17, spent the night at Friends last night, called me at six o' clock in the morning to pick her up. She's like, mom, my friends aren't going to school today. I want to go to school today. Can you please come and get me? I was so glad for the communication, you know, and we don't want our kids afraid to get in trouble with us. We want our kids communicating. And then let them know once you've done all that, what's important to you for the week because that matters too. Like, here's when I'm working, here are the things that I want to make sure happen this week. Can we partner on this? Can you work with me? Let's be a team. That is my absolute best that I can give you to have a great experience. And I'm not as worried about screen time as I am about, are you connecting? Is there open, honest communication? Are you paying attention to what's important to your kids in their emotional world? Are you paying attention to what's important to your kids in your relationship? And are you paying attention to what's important to them in terms of things you could be doing together? And you can never go wrong with quality time. You know, sometimes it's confronting if you're not used to it. If you just watch dinner in front of the TV and you're not talking that much, it can feel awkward at first. But have fun with it. Have fun with it.
So now that we've talked about, now that we talked about the kids and how to deal with the kids. Yeah, let's, let's talk about the vacation week from the parents because parents, because parents are looking at their social media and they're seeing other families on vacation for the week. And there is a whole lot of comparison right now being like, how, how do they get to do that and I can't and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Let's talk about that because I know a lot of, a lot of adults are dealing with that right now.
No, I think that's great that you're bringing this up. And I do also think it goes back to what is important to you for that week and life comparison games never feel Good. It always feels like crap, and we never really know what's going on. People can be overextended, maxing out their credit cards, making it look good on social media, and they're really shooting themselves in the foot financially or, you know, who knows how they're doing what they're doing. But you're resourceful. So what's important to you? That's the first question to be asking yourself. And I always say, there's no right way or wrong way to live your life. There's no right way or wrong way to heal. There's no right way or wrong way to do the kids vacation week. It's just what works for you. But often we're not checking in with ourselves around. Well, what would work for me? We're thinking about what should I be focusing on, what should I be doing or spending money on or not? So I absolutely think you should have at least one highlight for yourself every week of your life. Like, what are you doing in a week that you're looking forward to? And you can do it in a way where it doesn't cost money. All right. Vulnerable share. Can I tell you? Okay, so my last date with Mark, we just. He blindfolded me. We do this adventure challenge. So he blindfolded me, and we made a pie, and he was, like, moving my hands and figuring it all out. And this is, like, 20 bucks. And we had a whole kit show up at our door. And I'm in an apron and I'm blindfolded, and I am, like, making a pie blindfolded. I will post pictures later. Hysterical. My blindfold was. The blindfold was soaking wet because I was laughing so hard. I was crying. It was hysterical. So my point is, you don't need to spend a ton of money to have a good time to get creative, to enjoy your life. And I never would have thought of that date, like, just in my kitchen. And we literally. We both work from home. So at lunchtime, we made a pie that was the middle of just a random workday. So it can be fun and exciting your life, your week off with the kids. Just get creative. I remember. I remember when I was a single mom with my oldest, we used to go to pet stores to just look at the puppies because it was free. I had no money. So we would go and we would play with puppies, and we would meet puppies, and we would go to multiple pet shops in a day, and that is what we did. And then we would swing in the park. So whatever it is that is important to you. What I know for sure is you can find a way to do it and don't pressure yourself. And if it is out of your budget or out of scope now, commit to and plan for it for some day soon. And don't decide it's so far away or it's so out of reach that it's not worth it. Baby steps. Chip away. Make it happen. And make sure that you definitely, whether it's vacation week or not, have things that you're looking forward to and have fun, because we're supposed to, you know. And I think it's also really important to let your kids experience that side of you. Not just you're working, you're tired, you're stressed, you're working, you're tired, you're stressed. But you're fun and you're a person, too. So experience your kids as the best of you as much as you can, and yourself is the best of you as much as you can.
It is a mental wellness. Wednesday Life coach Rebecca Silence Tougher Together a breakthrough podcast rebeccasilence.com always a pleasure. Thank you so much. We'll talk to you next week.
Bye, everyone. I can't recommend enough using that as a time to ask your kids three questions. The first is, what's important to you now? So when it comes to vacation, what's one thing each child wants to have happen that week?
