How to Not Panic When You Don’t Have the Answers or Clarity, Yet - Guidance & Tools to Help

And we shake things up. It gets hot, it gets sticky. And we address healing and what's in the way of healing. The Hot Seat is brought to you by my incredible team and by rebeccasilence.com where you can go for anywhere from free to premium services to support you in your individual or your relationships healing journey. Today we are taking on the in between. We all have moments where it almost feels like a purgatory, where it almost feels like the energy isn't ever going to shift and change and we're just held hostage. So what do you do in those in between moments where you don't have answers yet and you don't have clarity yet and you want to do better than that default of fear or the ego taking over, or worse, you actually attacking yourself or other people. So I brought in an expert to have this conversation with today. Jennifer Norton is back with us and back and better than ever in the hot seat to talk about energy and healing and how we can move through these in between moments. Jennifer, welcome.

Thank you so much.

It's great to be back.

Oh, it's such an honor and privilege every time we get to talk. And there is Mercury retrograde happening right now. There are a lot of just energies collectively that are bigger than all of us, that are, that are real and happening. Talk to us about what do we need to know about these in between moments?

Yeah, well, with so many planets retrograde at the moment, it's always about a time to kind of reflect and maybe go back to reviewing certain aspects of our lives. A lot of the times, memories from our past will surface or a previous relationship, like an old lover or friend, somebody we haven't spoken to in a long time, they'll just suddenly make an appearance. Right. They'll reach out in some way, or we'll think of them and we may have a heavy reaction to that. So it's always an opportunity for us to kind of choose again. Right. Like maybe in the past we may have made a poor choice with that person, that relationship, that, that situation where we maybe attacked them or ourselves. And here we are again being given these opportunities. And if those aren't coming up, that's fine. But what can also happen during this time is it may almost feel like nothing is happening or that you're seething inside where you've got all this energy and things coming up, but you're not really sure how to express those things. So there's. It's very dynamic and it may not look that way or seem that way on the outside. But inside, there can be so much going on that can make us feel really uncomfortable or out of sorts of. And kind of lost or trying to figure out, like, how do I navigate this? What do I do about it? Because we're, you know, we're doers, whether we want. Want to admit it or not. I mean, that. That's more of an egoic part of us that wants to always do, do, do, do something about feeling. Not feeling comfortable. Right. And the, and the thing is, if we can just not do something about feeling uncomfortable and allow ourselves to feel that discomfort, to feel that awkwardness, knowing that that's actually what wants to leave. And it's really about not focusing so much on it, like we have to do something. I guess we're just so used to wanting to feel good all the time. And there's nothing wrong with feeling good all the time, but it's also not natural. There's going to be times when we don't feel good or we don't feel comfortable. And we have to be able to navigate that without trying to change what's here. Because when we try to change what's actually here and what's happening, we're just in resistance. And the greater we go into resistance, the worse we're going to feel. So it's kind of a slippery slope and a lot going on all at once right now.

Yeah. And if we can just back up. You're saying so much that's so good that I want to piggyback off of. But first, let's just back up what is happening with the collective energy and the planets and Mercury retrograde. For anybody, that's like, what on earth are they even talking about?

Well, it's just when a planet appears to be slowing down and going in reverse motion, it doesn't actually do it, but it's sort of, it's, it's symbolically doing it. And so that's why I was saying in the beginning, it's, it's, it can. It's usually a period of review, a time of review in our lives where the past may reappear in some form. And then it's sort of like, how are we going to handle this now with where we're at now? And hopefully we've moved along in our consciousness and in our ascension process where we may make a. A better choice for ourselves, for someone else. So that's sort of what's happening, but that's sort of a small piece. I mean, there's just so much more going on. I think collectively There's a lot of unrest. I'm feeling it as an empath. There's a lot of unrest happening on the planet. And so people are unhappy. There's just a lot of control stuff going on from government agencies. And then we've got the people that are, you know, they've got this awakening happening where they're feeling all of this burning passion and freedom coming up and that desire for more of that and then trying to figure out how to channel those energies in, in the right way. I mean, we're just going through massive change on the planet. And so actually we're seeing it also in the forms of volcanoes erupting, fires breaking out. There's a lot of fire energy happening right now. That is a way to gauge what is happening on the planet within people, internally. Our external world does represent what is going on internally, especially on the collective, if we're starting to see a lot of fire and destruction. And that's just an indicator of kind of where we're at collectively.

Yeah. And I think it is so important, it doesn't matter if it's a global pandemic or if it's Mercury retrograde or what. There are all of us that are going to experience moments of it's time to reflect and review and renew and reinvent. And a lot of people in my experience, in my work, they don't know how necessarily to reinvent and they're thinking that the situation outside of them are causing that internal experience. And I see it as a spiral. I hear this every single day in my practice, that I thought I was through this one already, or I thought I had dealt with this issue, or I thought that this was behind me. And the thing is, it's all a spiral, right. Life just keeps going. And I love what you're saying about resistance. And I think we should dive more into resistance. Jennifer, if we resist, okay, this is life giving me another opportunity to check out where I'm at. And again, back to what you said about we are here to do. But in these moments of reflection, there really isn't anything to do. It's about who are you going to be? So when that spiral comes back around, now I get a chance to see, well, how healed am I actually, how much have I ascended here or not and who am I going to be now? Because we don't get to escape the past, we don't get to escape the difficulty, but we can be that most inspired, highest version of ourselves. And we can keep practicing as life keeps coming back around.

Yeah, absolutely. And the more we go into resistance with what is like if just because we're not liking what's happening. And of course there's a lot not to like right now.

Yeah.

So. And the more we fight against that with either internally or externally, the worse we're going to feel. But it's not about suppressing our feelings, it's just noticing where am I resistance to the way things are right now. And then it doesn't mean you're supposed to check out and not do anything. That's the time where you go, hmm, what do I need? You know, and then going, taking that time to do some self reflection is really important and whatever way works for you because there's so many ways to do it and you know, there's no one size fits all. But finding some way to get in, to go within, to do some inner reflection, like where am I feeling out of sorts with myself? Right. Where am I in resistance to what's happening and what, what do I just need from me? And then being able to just let go of trying to figure it out, figuring, trying to figure it out is just a terrible place to be because it's just going to get us all spun up. So as we let go of trying to figure anything out and surrender to I don't need to know in this moment, it really, when we go to that place, I don't need to know in this moment, we are liberated from whatever we're in resistance to, whatever we're struggling with, whatever we're trying to figure out. Because when we don't need to know, it actually opens that door up within us to allow our inner source, the divine, the universe, whatever you want to call it, to rush in. And, and then you're either going to know or you're just going to be in, just continue to be in that silent space. But you're going to feel nurtured, supported. You know, it'll, it'll just, it'll create a shift in your frequency. And that's what we're talking about.

Well, and it can be this simple. What am I noticing and what am I needing and who am I going to be now? While the in between is the in between, the clarity will come again. Your next right step in your knowing of. Okay, now this makes sense. It's idealistic, but it's available to you to believe in the possibility that those answers, they are coming in this season that we're in, it won't last forever. And it is real that people are shaken up, our lives have gotten turned upside down and we're all looking at all of the pieces that got dumped out and deciding what we're going to do with them and who we're going to be. And it's okay not to rush ourselves and it's okay to not run from the uncomfortable, you know, and you said something earlier, Jennifer, about, you know, we want to feel good, and I think we do, but I also think we're addicted to not thinking we get to feel good. You know, I think it's both ways. Like, there are people that just won't let themselves have the joy and won't let themselves have the moments of feeling good. And we can't surrender into that either. And it's all going to right itself. And then we can experience what we want to experience and feel how we want to feel, even in the. In between when we get out of resistance. So let's talk more about resistance and how that can look like attack and what we can do about that.

Yeah, well, resistance can come up in so many ways. We can resist something as simple as the weather, like just not liking that it's raining or not liking that it's too hot and then. Or just not liking what someone has said to us and. And then taking that and letting it and really letting it have its way when it's getting, in other words, giving it way more power than we need to. Right. It's like, you don't need to let the rain ruin your day. It's just a rainy day. You just go on doing what you're here to do. And you don't need to let what someone said, especially on social media, ruin your day. You know, you can get you. You've got to choose. Where do you want to put your attention and your energy and where do you want. Because that's going to also affect your frequency. Right. When we get all spun up and spun out about something that's really bothering us, it's kind of taking us on a course that it's like, you have to ask yourself, do I really want to go down that road right now? How is that helpful? It's like, how do I want to feel? And bringing it back to, we are the ones who get to decide how we want to feel. You know, how we. How we want to choose to act, what we want to say and how we want to feel in any moment.

So.

But it takes presence of mind to go there. Because if we checked out, if we're spun up and spun out and stressed out and angry and upset, we're Just caught. We're just. Just stuck in emotion. And that emotion is going to have its way with us, and we're never going to really. You know, that can just wash you out. Right. Unless you have the presence of mind to go, whoa, I'm caught in a lot of heavy emotion right now. Let me just take a step back. Observe this.

Breathe.

Like, what can I do to just chill out, let this go without shutting.

Down or numbing out? Right. That's the trick. And then again, that point you made earlier about the external world is a reflection of our internal world. What I like to do is play a game with, like, okay, this person said this or didn't do this, and now I'm feeling some kind of way. Well, whatever that is, it's already going on in you. So they just gave you access to a wound that gives you an opportunity to release an emotion that, like Jennifer said, if. If it doesn't get released in a healthy way, it stays stuck and it has us spin out. So if we can go, okay, this is happening like the pandemic. This is really happening. And how I'm experiencing it, if it's feeling in a way that I don't want to feel, I get an opportunity now to look at it, to get curious about it, to address it, to sit with it without necessarily having to do anything except feel the emotion I'm having.

Yes, exactly, because this is how we move through it, how we purify it and burn it up. That is our actual superpower as beings of love and light. This is what we came here to do. And the old way of healing was, like, thinking it took, I don't know, something outside of us to do it, to fix it, but it's really all coming from within us. It's an internal combustion. But it won't happen if we don't give ourselves the time and space to. To sit with it and to be with it. And it doesn't take a long time. All you need is six seconds. Six seconds of pure stillness, sitting with that. That feeling of emotion or fear, whatever it is. And I had a perfect example of something that happened to me a few days ago where I got triggered. I don't even know why I got triggered. I just did. And I felt devastated. I felt this sense of, like, missing, a fear of missing out. I felt just awful inside, like, oh, my gosh, you know, I didn't get to do that thing that I really wanted to do. And then I just started to feel awful, and. And I found myself feeling like, okay, I want to do something to get rid of this. I want to do something to get rid of this. I'm like, no, no, no, actually that's the wrong thing. I'm like, why don't I just sit with this horrible feeling and see what happens? And I got really still. I went outside, I sat on my back step and I'm like, I am just gonna breathe into this feeling of just devastation and missing out. Because it wasn't making sense. It was like elevated to an extreme anyway. So the more I just did that, sat with it, I spent well more than six seconds with it. I just said, okay, I'm gonna give this whatever time I need. I spent at least five minutes with it. And then all of a sudden I felt incredible. It was like, it felt like this thing just burned up. It just disintegrated. And I couldn't even figure out why I had that feeling. It didn't matter. And then I was like, now, okay, I felt like I'm just going to go do something else now because I felt like I could. I wasn't paralyzed by the feeling anymore.

Yeah. And when you were talking about we get to decide what we give our power to, I think it has a lot to do with being willing to face what seems unacceptable. And that's where I think the attack energy can take over within ourselves and with other people. When we decide this isn't okay, this person, the situation, this way I am, this way I am not. When we decide something should be different, that something isn't okay or unacceptable, we are going to start attacking. And that is, that is a fear based vibration. That is not who we really are. It perpetuates the chaos, the madness energetically that's going on. I mean, again, I recognize really idealistic, but if I can learn how to not attack myself for having cancer, cancer for being cancer, my body for taking as long as it's taken to heal, we can all get better at putting ourselves in check. When we want to attack, attack. And when we want to be defensive, it's another form of attack. And when we're wanting to put people in their place, put ourselves down, put others down, we're hurting each other and humanity.

Yeah.

What would you say about attack?

Well, it's a choice.

And some people, it can feel unconscious because it comes up so quickly and they're taking it's. It takes them over so fast. Right. But for those of us who are working our spiritual path and saying, I don't want that part of me to run the show, anymore. I don't want that part of me to be in charge. So we're taking a more conscious approach and going, wow, I just really want to like sound off on that person or myself about this thing, the situation and then going but okay, what am I attacking? What am I upset about and what is this triggering in me and how is that going to be helpful? Because really we're always kind of reacting to someone's patterns, the truth of who and what we are being pure love, that is what we are and we're uncovering more of that. And as we're uncovering it, what we're doing is uncovering the patterns. We're burning them up, we're purifying them and they're being healed and, and what's being revealed is more and more the truth of our multi dimensional selves, the who and what we really are underneath the facade. And it's really that, that false self, that ego itself, that is the one getting reactive, that is upset, that is attacking. And you know, you just got to do the best you can in every moment. And if you're having an off day, if you lose your, your crap over something and you attack somebody verbally or yourself, you just have to go, okay. Usually later on it's like, let me review this because you're not going to feel good. That's the number one indicator where you know you've gone off track is you don't feel good.

Right.

You feel bad and then you want to blame the other person for why you feel bad, but it's nothing to do with them, it's all you. And so if you're not feeling good after a situation like that, that's the time to come and go, okay, you know, where was this coming from? Was this just a call for love and I missed it? You know.

Yeah.

And that's, and that's the whole nature of forgiveness like with the course in miracles is what are we forgiving? It's we're just forgiving ourselves, forgetting the truth of who we are.

Yeah. And I think it's about, you know, that facade that, that fear based ego based self. It's really just our survival personality that doesn't know that it will survive without defensiveness and that being ready to attack at any moment but, but we will survive and we can be contributing. If you're here and if you're watching this, you have the ability to lead in being more love and light for the world. I believe that. And we all, it is a decision are going to do our Best. And this, this thing about feeling good, I mean, we, I think also need to evaluate what does feeling good mean to us. To me, it's neutral. It isn't about like orgasmic bliss. It's about I'm not charged one way or the other. Right. Then I'm fully in power and in control of what I have over when I'm neutral. Right. So at the very least we could all recognize when we're not neutral, there's healing to do. And whatever happened outside of us, it's access to whatever healing inside is available in that moment. We don't have to do anything with it, but we get to. And once we've become aware, our best is enough and we just need to keep doing our best to be. It's that golden rule, you know, do unto others as you would have them do unto you. If you don't want to be attacked, let's put perspective in place. How are you being for the world?

Yeah, absolutely.

Will you take us through a little guidance and possibly a meditation of some kind to get us to neutral and still and just being with the moment without doing anything about it? Jennifer?

Sure.

Thank you.

Yeah. So just taking a moment to get comfortable.

Close your eyes and feeling into your.

Body.

And the feeling of you.

And whatever's here for you now, whatever surfacing.

Whatever emotions are present or opinions or.

Judgments, it's okay because those, those aren't really who you.

But we're just going to let them be here.

And as we allow ourselves to observe.

The thoughts and the feelings and the emotions.

We'Re not trying to do anything with them, we're just observing them. Neither accepting nor rejecting any of it. Even our anger, maybe our anger at what.

Somebody said or an opinion that.

Was expressed or what's happening with mandates, whatever it is, we're not bypassing the.

Feeling, we're including it without judging it or reacting to it. And as we include it, we just want to be still. And just from this place of stillness, noticing everything without trying to control anything.

And this allows your own self healing.

Ability to switch on and burn up or incinerate anything that is not really.

You.

That'S not really yours.

It.

And we tell ourselves and our bodies to just undo, undo what's here or what's standing in the way. Good. And now we shift to transmute.

Good.

And now from here we just move to generate.

You don't have to worry about what these words mean. It's your body knows exactly what to do. Yeah.

And you'll start to feel a deeper Stillness as these things transmute and leave your personal space. And you will start to feel more at peace and you'll know what to do from that place or not to do. You'll just know how to be.

Good.

So just bringing your attention and awareness back to where you are and back to this moment.

Thank you, Jennifer. And you can take five minutes and do that guided exercise anytime, anytime. If it feels like it's too challenging on your own to get still and just be. There are so many different opportunities for you to be supported through meditation, through coaching, through therapy. But it's just about like lacing up your sneakers before you exercise, taking that time to commit to that first six seconds, you know, and we all get to let go of what doesn't serve us. We do not need to carry it, hold onto it, have it define us, or just decide it is what it is. And you know something's not serving you when it is causing stress on any level. And if you go, this thing is causing me stress so I need to run from it. You didn't transmute the stress. So if you can lean into it, even if you don't know what to do and just be with it, it does start to lose its power over you and it starts to break down and more clarity is inevitable. You don't know when it's going to come, but just know it's going to come. I think today's conversation in the hot seat is so important. Jennifer, final thoughts and homework.

Just relax as much as you can right now and notice what triggers you, but don't let it overtake you, you know, because it's tempting. We get real tempted. The ego is very tempted to get triggered and react and do something.

It thinks it's got to do something about it.

And if you can just say, wait a minute, I need to pause and reflect on how I feel and how.

I want to respond instead of react.

Yeah, I think that's great coaching. And if you would like to get in touch with Jennifer, Jennifer, how do they get in touch with you?

Through my website, jennifernortonhealing.com you can click on the appointments tab and you can book a free consultation with me. I'm happy to discuss whatever's going on before you decide to work with me.

Awesome. Yeah. Thank you so much again for being here. Thank you all as always for joining us for the healing is possible hot seat and for your courage and commitment to healing for yourself and humanity. Again, the hot seat is brought to you by rebeccasilence.com if you're ready for some real kick ass support so that you can get the results that you want. Get in touch with me rebeccasilence.com and we will be back next Tuesday 10am Mountain every week for another episode of the Healing as possible hot seat. Bye everybody.