In a Mix 102.5 radio segment titled Mental Wellness Wednesday, host Big Papa (Speaker A) discusses an upcoming family reunion fraught with tension: his mother’s side of the family has lost two members, leaving five relatives, and one member is estranged from several others. Seeking advice on how to handle the situation without wasting precious time on grudges, he turns to Rebeccah Silence, a love and emotional healing coach. Rebeccah frames the conflict as a common family dynamic where individuals often hold onto "funkalicious" grudges and mistakenly try to fix others. She emphasizes that emotions experienced at the reunion are the listener’s own work, urging the host not to take on others’ feelings or attempt to heal them. Instead, she advises setting clear boundaries, staying relaxed and genuinely joyful, and using compassionate language such as “I love you too much to fight” or offering an alternative like taking an aunt for ice cream. She suggests offering a later, private conversation (coffee, Zoom) if deeper issues arise, and stresses the power of being the most relaxed person in the room. The segment concludes with a promotion of Rebeccah’s free masterclass—"3 Must‑Know Secrets to Heal and Save Your Family"—and an invitation to DM her on Instagram (@rebeccahsilence) for further support.
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We're live and local. It's Mix 102.5, Big Papa in the Morning on a Mental Wellness Wednesday. With the world's leading love and emotional healing coach. Her name is Rebeccah Silence, online at theunsilentwoman.com. Rebeccah, good morning. How are you?
Hey everybody, I'm so happy to be here. Let's go.
Let's talk about family drama. Oh good. Well, and here's, here's why, here's why I bring it up, because, uh, the Spado family reunion is this weekend, okay? Which is my mom's side of the family, okay? Okay, and my mom is one of 7, and we lost— unfortunately, we lost 2 of the 7 last year, so now we're down to 5. Okay, and one of the 5 isn't talking to like 3 or 4 of the other ones. Like, it's, it's like, first, for one reason or another, I don't get into it, you know, it's their thing, but It is concerning considering— and this is, this was how I was thinking about it last night. Unfortunately, you know, time, everyone's time is limited, and to, to waste that time being in like mad at somebody and holding a grudge and not talking to somebody, I, I don't know, is there a way to, to handle it? Is Like, part of me wants to, like, take my one aunt for a ride and for ice cream and be like, what is wrong with you? You know what I'm saying? So how can we navigate this this weekend?
Oh, thank you for bringing this up, because so many families go through this and just pretend like they're fine. Nobody needs to know. And it's heartbreaking. So you're so correct that there's too much precious time to spend what I call lovingly funkalicious, right? Like when, when you are— you're the one being funky when you're the one holding the grudge, right? You're the one being funky when you're pretending like you're angry because of somebody else. Now notice what I just said— pretending to be angry because of somebody else. I'm not giving jerks free passes, but if you're the one funkalicious with fumes coming out of your ears and nose and other places They didn't do it. They activated in you what you haven't dealt with yet, boo. And until you deal with it, nothing's gonna make it go away. So Wayne Dyer talks about we're all oranges, and what comes out of us when we're squeezed, that's already there. They didn't put the juice in you. So how you feel at this family function, or in bed laying at night when you're thinking about your family, That is your work. Now here's also what your work is. Please don't take on what's coming out of the other person like you caused it, or you somehow magically have the ability to heal them, cure them, make them peaceful, because you don't.
You can't.
I know, right?
No, that's a fatal flaw of mine forever. I feel like I'm a fixer and I can't fix everything. And people have to deal with their own stuff.
What, what you can do is be brave enough to stand for, which you already started talking about, here's what I'm gonna do to have a great time, here's what I'm gonna do to be careful with the hearts of everybody at this reunion. This is an art, and most coaches and therapists, and I'm both, don't teach it. Be careful with people's hearts whether or not they deserve it. Now that doesn't mean take crap. I'm not inviting you to stand in the middle of the road and hope you don't get run over by a car. But you can say something like, yeah, this isn't how I do things.
Mhm.
If you want to have a loving, respectful moment with me, yes, I'm here for it. If not, I'm taking Aunt Kim and we're going to get some ice cream. Like, literally do that. Do you know the most powerful person in the room is the most relaxed and the most joyful. Not fake joyful or inebriated joyful, like genuinely joyful, right?
Right.
I want you to get, you don't have to participate in the crazy, in the nonsense, in the drama. Your job is to stay you, to stay loving, to keep your heart open and to not take crap and to not take it personally and be the example for the family. My other great one-liner is, I love you too much to have this fight with you. I'm not gonna go here. I love you too much. If you want to have a real conversation, if you want to get close, let me know. And that's the last thing I'll leave us with today, is please know you can get closer in the face of any conflict. You literally can. But most people don't lean in, they lean out, so they never have that experience. So, do you want to get closer to me? Let's, let's work on this. Let's figure out a solution that works for us both moving forward if you want that. Because these are the moments where when you haven't talked in 5, 10, 20 years, people want to hash it all out. And you can also say, I'm not available for this here, but I am available for coffee tomorrow after everybody's gone, or for a phone call or a Zoom call next week when we're home. You don't have to be at the effect of the drama. Go and DM me @rebeccahsilence on Instagram, family, and we will send you the free masterclass, the 3 Must-Know Secrets to Heal and Save Your Family. And thank you.
Absolutely incredible. Absolutely incredible. It is the world's leading love and emotional healing coach. She is Rebeccah Silence. Online, theunsilentwoman.com. Mental Wellness Wednesday. Rebeccah Silence, great stuff as always.
