Why Recruiting Leaders Unknowingly Settle

Hey, it's Richard Milligan here, Forsee Recruiting, and we're about to cut episode 33. I think about that, episode 33 for our podcast Recruiting Conversations. So glad to have you today. If you see any of these videos, you know that we do a little intro and a little outro at the end as an extra. For this, but we are gonna go live in a second. We're gonna talk today about this concept of settling. You know, I do believe that a lot of people unintentionally settle when they are, you know, trying to accomplish big things. And a lot of my audience is recruiting leaders, so the recruiting leaders trying to build a team, trying to grow multiple teams, a lot of times trying to build a market or multiple markets. One of the things I know is that that individual typically doesn't see themselves as settling because their work ethic, their commitment in terms of time and energy is not settling. When I think of settling, I think of something completely different than what most people think of. We're going to talk about that today on the podcast. I did an interview a couple days ago for an article that's being written. And got asked a good question. So we're going to share that in Recruiting Conversations. We're going to go live now here in three, in two, and in one. Hey everybody, it's Richard Melligan, your host of Recruiting Conversations. Welcome back to another episode. It is episode thirty-three, and it's pretty crazy to think just a few months ago—I say a few months ago—but just I don't know what. 9 months ago we started this, and now here we are at episode 33, and it's a growing audience. So thank you to every one of you that's actually shared this with someone, because, um, you know, I'm passionate about it. And if you listen to this, you know that I'm passionate about it. Sometimes I get a little too wound up in my podcast talking to myself, and, um, and that's a little bit odd. If you've ever gotten wound up talking to yourself, I think there's medication for that. I'm just not on any of it. I am really excited about recruiting, and I'm really passionate about this idea of sharing ideas with people that are in the recruiting leader space. And of course, that recruiting leader is someone who actually manages a team but then is also responsible for building recruiting to that team. And so I'm extremely passionate about That audience and helping that audience win. And the reason why is because I spent well over 15 years in that space in 2 different industries and know that there's very little training in this area that would actually help the individuals that are trying their darndest to build something to go win. And so because of that, we give away a ton of free resources. We're going to give away this podcast as one of those resources. And as part of this, there's actually going to be— from time to time, we share an extra value add, which is an additional link that you can go to to get more information that will bring value to you. So we're going to share another one of those pieces with you today. And I'm going to jump right into this. This last week— this week, not last week— over the last couple of days, I actually did an interview. For an article that's being written. Got asked a really good question. And my— as I was answering the question, one of the things I realized is that, man, I think everyone needs to hear my response to this if they're a recruiting leader, because I think there's value here. I think there's some aha moments to be had in what's being said. And so I'm blessed in that I get to simply think about recruiting and I get to talk about recruiting all day long. And if you're a recruiting leader, you may spend 30, 45 minutes a day in this particular space. That may be it. Now, you may spend more, but I have found that about 15 to 30 minutes a day, especially in a busy season, is about all that a recruiting leader can carve out. Now, if you're a recruiter, a straight-up recruiter, that is your life and it's what you do. But if you're leading a team, this is one of the maybe 15 hats that you wear in a day. And so if you'll carve out 30 minutes, that seems like you're maxing out. And so I get that. And because of that, we get really excited about sharing some things with you that allow you to actually get better in that 30 minutes a day that you actually spend recruiting. And so we're going to talk about that and some of the ideas that I shared in an article a couple days ago. So here's the question that I got asked. Why do you think people settle? And the other question, the follow-up question to that is, how can recruiting leaders know if they're settling? Now, I know that when I got asked this question, why do you think it is that people settle? There was something that rose up in me because I don't— the people that I deal with, I don't think that they do believe they're settling. When you look at their energy, When you look at the amount of effort that they're putting into this, the amount of passion that they're putting into what they do, I would be offended if I was that individual and someone said, "Look, you're settling. You're just settling," right? I mean, when when I think of settling, and I don't know, you can't see this unless you're watching the video version of this. And if you want to check that out, I do have a YouTube channel, a Vimeo channel. You can check those out. But I'm laughing right now, and that my I'm smiling ear to ear. And the reason why I'm smiling ear to ear. As I say this is that when I think of someone settling, I think of a middle-aged man with a beer in his hand, his feet up in a La-Z-Boy, waiting for his welfare check to show up while he's watching daytime television. Okay? So, there's a visual for you. When I think of settling, I think of that. Look, over the last 23 months or however long I've been doing this, What I know is that the 400+ people that I've actually met with one-on-one, I've coached, I've never had anyone come in that wasn't all in, that wasn't putting forth their best effort. Now, was some of it misdirected? Absolutely. Was there a lack of really knowledge and education that led them to a place where they could apply the things that actually would actually help them win? Absolutely. So in context, I want to establish just at a foundational level, when we say, why do you think it is that people settle? I believe that most don't believe they're settling because of the amount of effort they put into something. But in truth, there's more available, which means that they are settling. If there's more available to them where they're putting forth the same amount of energy, And the same amount of effort to get something in terms of a different result, then it's a knowledge issue. You don't know what you don't know until you know it. Now, there's a really intelligent— go tweet that one. You don't know what you don't know until you know it. Now, here's what I'm hopeful is that you know it before it's too late. Okay, like, this is the reason why we do this podcast, because we really want to help people know what they don't know, and we really want to help people have these aha moments before it is too late. And I've worked with leaders that have shown up and have said, I got 90 days to build on this team, right? I lost 3 people last month, I lost half of my team, and so now I got to go recruit and recruit quickly or I'm in trouble. So I've seen that, and that can happen with people. So let's talk about this thing of how do we know if someone's settling? Clarity is the first thing I'm going to actually talk about here. Do you have clarity in why you're doing what you're doing? Not having clarity around your calling, not having clarity of your vision of what you actually want to build in the market or markets that you're in, actually leads to settling. And the reason why is that everyone ends up somewhere, but few people end up somewhere on purpose. And that's very true. Like, we all end up in a place, but few of us are really intentional about that place that we end up. And so we just end up somewhere. And look, if you're a decent leader, you should actually see some organic growth in your market. But is that actually maximizing the opportunity that you have, or is it to some degree settling? And what I would say is that where people are really clear in why they're doing what they're doing, and then also clear on what they want to actually achieve, what they want to build by having a vision, then those people don't settle. One of the things that happened to me is 2007, I was actually in the mortgage industry, and I was actually beginning of 2007, in significant growth mode in my business. And I really, to make that statement, I didn't know what I didn't know until it was too late. Man, if you were in the mortgage industry in 2007, you are shaking your head right now. You're like, yeah, like I know what that, you know, 3rd and 4th quarter and going into '08 and '09, what that looked like. You know, in that season, I actually came to some clarity as to my calling, some clarity around what was most important to me. One of the things that happened to me was, look, I failed miserably in 2007 because I didn't know what was going to happen and I wasn't prepared for what took place. I get into Q3, Q4 2007 and I'm failing miserably and I really don't— I know I'm going to have to recreate myself, but I really have no idea how I'm going to recreate myself. I was in a window personally and professionally where I just struggled. It got me into the place where getting out of bed in the mornings was a feat. Just waking up every single day and knowing I'm going to have to have hard conversations, that I'm going to deal with a lot of conflict, that I'm in the middle of recreating myself and have no idea how to recreate myself. I woke up every single day just saying, I'm not sure this is worth it. I'm not sure I want to actually go into the office and deal with my people and make the hard decision that I was going to have to make. In that season, I go back. Now, I've got 4 kids, and if you listen to this, I may have brought that up a couple of times, but my oldest today is 17. But when I map that back to 2007, Ethan was 5 years old. Gavin's my 12-year-old today. Gavin was a newborn in 2007. Leah and I had been married for 8 years at the time. If you know my full story, you know that I actually grew up extremely poor. I mean, some part of my story is that I remember duct taping my tennis shoes. I remember actually eating saltine crackers and milk for breakfast. I remember being evicted from homes. That's part of my story. Because of that, when 2007 rolled around and I began to struggle and have this enormous loss, it took me back to a time and a place where I said, I'm never going to live like this. I remember waking up every single day and seeing the faces of my wife and my 2 young sons. And saying, you made a promise to yourself that if you had a family, they wouldn't live like this. And so in those moments, one of the things that became very clear to me is that one of my largest motivators was them. I was putting my feet on the floor every single morning for Ethan and Gavin and Leah. It wasn't for me. It wasn't for more money or a better title or for building a new home or— Creating financial freedom. I literally woke up every single day, and what got me out of bed and what got me moving forward was clarity around who I was doing this for and why I was doing it for them. And so I know in that season, I actually did, in about a 6-month window, recreate myself and get back to a place where I was having a lot of success in the mortgage industry simply because I had that clarity. I think that people settle in terms of not even knowing they're settling because they just simply lack clarity around why they're doing what they're doing and they're unclear what vision— what their vision is for their market and what the vision is for their life. The second thing that came up as part of this question as I answered it was this: I think people settle from a lack of accountability. Look, here's one of the things I know about me. This is just about me. For those of you that don't need accountability in your life, that you're just like, you wake up every single morning and you're at 110% of your own capacity and you don't struggle with things like wanting to move towards the path of least resistance, if that's you, then this doesn't represent you. For the other 99.9% of you— You need accountability. We all have limitations around what we can do on our own. What I found is that by creating accountability, we increase our capacity to do things. I'll give you an example in my own life because I do think that it's relative to sharing your own story so that people can connect and have some ideas around this. Every Tuesday, I meet with 3 people that I'm aligned with in terms of my beliefs and my values that are where I'm at or ahead of me. They might say, look, I'm where you're at, not ahead of you. But I look at them and these are 3 men that I aspire to be like, that are great husbands, great fathers, that are entrepreneurs, that have built successful businesses, that that are also growing those businesses today significantly. I look at them and I say, I need that accountability because it actually stretches me. Iron sharpens iron. By having a Tuesday morning meeting, there's a level of accountability that comes from that. By meeting every single Tuesday with those 3 guys, Clay, Shane, and Jay, what happens is that I actually stretch my capacity to be more. I stretch my capacity to do more. Because of the accountability that this small group creates for me. Outside of that, I actually have a lot of other areas where there's accountability. I encourage people to create accountability because what that means is that we won't settle on things that we know we shouldn't be settling for. As an example, one of my core values is that my family comes first. My family comes before my business. My family comes before my personal interest. And so I need accountability in that. So my wife, Leah, becomes the accountability in that. I have given her permission to say things like, working 80 hours a week is too much, Richard. And I need the tension that she creates in that. And I've given her permission to speak to that so that I can actually increase my capacity to be a better father and to be a better husband. So I've created accountability there. Now, outside of that, one of the things that I know is that when I have specific things I need to accomplish, I gotta go create accountability around those. Let me give you a very simple— a couple of simple examples. This podcast only takes place because I've created accountability. If I don't deliver the podcast at a specific time, then I write a check anyways to the individual that's helped me get this podcast on all the platforms and getting it prepared with an intro and an outro and getting it promoted. I write that check whether I deliver the podcast or not. There's accountability there. I go back to the beginning of 2017. At the beginning of 2017, one of the things that I realized is that my leadership brand needs to be strengthened. So I made a promise to myself and said that in 2017, I'm going to post on LinkedIn Monday through Friday every week for the entire year. What I realized, knowing me, is that just making that statement or writing it down on paper or saying I'm going to hold myself accountable to it wasn't enough. That I needed more accountability and by creating more accountability, I was going to increase my capacity and I would do it. So inside that, I asked somebody to hold me accountable and I actually said, look, if you'll hold me accountable to doing this, if I don't post just even one day and you catch me not posting one day within a 24-hour window, then I will write you a $2,500 check. If you can catch me not posting one day on a Monday through Friday. And I knew that by just even making that statement, or at least I hoped that by making that statement, there would be enough tension there that I would be held accountable to it. So, I intentionally created additional accountability by actually involving somebody else in that space. And guess what? I did it. I actually wrote Every single day, Monday through Friday, for all of 2017. Since then, when I look back at 2017, '18, and now here in '19, I've had less than a handful of days, I would say 3 or 4 days max, where I haven't posted in protecting my leadership brand and delivering content in that window of time. Now, of course, my wife thought I was nuts. She's like, you're doing what? I'm like, no, no, understand. This is making sure that this is going to take place. It's not going to happen. But here's part of that story. I love that story. It was like Friday night. Now, I have a habit journal and if you're on the video, you'll see the little habit journal, how I'm holding it up. But I have a little habit journal that I use and the things I say I'm going to do, I write in the habit journal every single day. As I'm going to bed, I put a checkmark in the category, did I accomplish that? So, whatever it is, it's in my habit journal. If I want to do it consistently and then I actually put a checkmark, it's actually an X that I put in that column, did I do it for the day? So in 2017, I'm going to bed on a Friday night. It's like, and I mean, it's like 11:55. So we're going to bed, I reach over for my habit journal, I open it up and I'm like, oh darn, I have not posted on LinkedIn today. And you know what I did? I picked up my phone, okay? I created some content and I dropped it on the platform and I barely beat the midnight cutoff to make that happen. Otherwise I would've written that $2,500 check. The only reason why that took place was because I created accountability. Now, here's the other part of that. I hadn't thought about this. When you post at 11:55 or whatever time it was on Friday night, bumping up against midnight, no one else posts on LinkedIn over the weekend, or most people don't deliver content on the weekend. And so I was blown away by how much engagement I had on that content piece simply because there was no other content for people to engage with. And you think you fast forward even Monday morning, not many people deliver content on LinkedIn early Monday morning. So I created like a 30-hour window of time where if you jumped on the platform, I was the content that showed up in your newsfeed. And so inadvertently, I hacked a little bit of a system there, a little bit of a strategy there, simply because of that idea that I had accountability around that. The second part of this is, when you look at those first 2 answers, do I have clarity? If you answer, I don't have clarity in my vision, I don't have clarity of why I'm doing what I'm doing, then you're settling. The second part of that is, if you look around you and you say, I don't have accountability, guess what? Then you're settling. The third part of this is, as I answered this question for the article, was people settle Unbeknowingly because they don't have a system. The system is another component that stretches you. The system is a component that allows you in a same window of time to accomplish more. I actually mapped out a couple weeks ago, I mapped out 32 minutes of recruiting efforts in the system that I teach. When I mapped this out, like literally mapped it out minute by minute, I mapped out 2 days. One was a 32-minute day and the other was a 28-minute day because someone said, you can't really accomplish anything in 30 minutes of recruiting. And I said, it's because you don't have a system. Let me prove that to you. And I mapped this out through 2 documents minute by minute. What could I accomplish because I understand the system that I teach in 32 minutes or 28 minutes? And I accomplished more In 32 minutes than most people do in 2 days. And the reason why is because I have a system. Look, there's a way that the universe is wired to work. There's a reason why we know that the sun's going to come up every single morning and it's going to set every single night. We know that spring, summer, fall, and winter, they come, unless you're in Florida and you just have summer. Right? There's a way the universe works, and the way the universe works, We have to pay attention to it because the universe works very systematically. We know when the moon's going to be out, when there's going to be a full moon, when there's going to be a harvest moon. We know when that's going to happen. There's a way the universe works and it's all systematic. One of the things that we also know is that successful people always have a system. Now, most people that I've come across, and I would say 99+ 99+% of people that I've come across that I've coached have very little system in their recruiting efforts. So this statement holds true: extreme systems or extreme structure equals extreme success. So how do you know if you're settling? Do you have a system? Do you have an extreme system? Do you have extreme structure around recruiting efforts? If you don't have that, then the answer to the question is you are settling. Now, go through these 3 things. Give yourself a 1 to 10. How much clarity do I have around why I'm doing what I'm doing? How much clarity do I have around my vision for my team and my market? What is it, a 1 to 10? Do I have accountability? Have I created accountability so that I can increase my capacity to do things, to stretch myself? 1 out of 10. Do I have a system? Do I have an extreme system? Rate yourself 1 to 10. And what you will find is that in several of these areas, there are areas that you need to go focus on. How do you get clarity? How do you create accountability? How do you improve your system? Identify an area that you're going to focus on, an area that you're going to work on. Work on that area and move forward. By doing that, what you will be saying to yourself is that, I realize that I am settling and that I'm going to stretch myself and refuse to settle. I hope those answers that I gave in that article bring value to you today. You have to understand that by answering these 3 questions in itself, you're creating tension. That's it. By answering these 3 questions, you're creating tension. I'm here a lot of times just to insert some tension. By inserting tension, what I know is that your eyes will open up a little bit more, your energy will go up a little bit more, and you'll move towards something that will be one change that might change everything for you. That's really what we're about, is we're about About that one change. So we started out the podcast talking about changing one thing per week for 52 weeks. What does that look like? Here we are. What is the one change that you'll move towards? I know that if you'll focus on these 3 areas, what you'll realize is that if over a window of time you change in the clarity, accountability, and system arena, you'll look back and you'll realize, I was settling. We don't want to do that. We've all been created to do something great, and I believe that. You've been created for a purpose, just like I've been created for a purpose. And when we're clear on that and we're clear in our calling, you and I have the ability to change things dramatically. I think great leaders— this is one of the things I know— great leaders change more than just a single transaction. They change more than just a single person on their team. Great leaders impact people beyond the office. They're impacting husbands and wives. They're impacting fathers and mothers. They're impacting grandfathers and grandmothers. We're impacting the communities that we're in. I could tell you stories about individual people in my life today that impacted me in such a way that I still remember it, and it still are things that I apply to my life and I apply to my business that were with me for a very short window of time. What they left with me carries on. What they left with me is part of their legacy and I passed it on to someone else. This one change that you make can actually impact someone at a level that actually impacts a generation. When you understand that, it should drive you to want to reach for more. It should have you wanting to stretch and increase your capacity for the things that you're doing. Because you have, as a leader, more impact in one pinky than you actually realize. And so I hope this inspires you to make some change today. If this has brought value to you, I'd love it if you would share it. This is actually on a website, recruitingconversations.com. I'm gonna share a link here, and I should have talked about this earlier, but I'm gonna share a link. There's an extra value add for you as part of this. And I want you to go to recruitingconversations.com/leadershipbranding. There's an extra nugget there for you that you can actually download as part of this podcast. And I would share that recruitingconversations.com/leadershipbranding. There's a nugget there that you can share with the people that you are aligned with, other leaders in your organization. And until we actually Meet again on the next podcast here at Recruiting Conversations. Have a blessed week, everybody, and we will talk to you then. There you have it, another podcast in the books. Don't settle. Okay, that's my advice to you today. Don't settle. There's more available than we realize. And what I realize when I get clarity and when I create accountability, when I improve my systems, what I do is I I stretch myself. And every single time I stretch myself, it's like a rubber band. The rubber band, if you hold it out long enough, what will happen is it no longer goes back. And so I continuously stretch myself. And as I stretch myself, I look back at the me 5 years ago, 10 years ago, I don't even recognize that guy. And the reason why I don't recognize him is that it's been a journey for me of incremental improvement. And over a longer window of time, as we grow and as we improve, our impact actually grows and our impact actually improves. And so it's willing to consider, am I settling as part of this? Look forward to seeing you again on another video soon. This brought value to you. I'd love it if you'd share the link. You can go directly to my podcast page, Recruiting Conversations, if you want to just share the podcast itself. But until we actually see each other again on another video, Have a great week, everybody. Bye.