130: MMM - New Year's Eve Round-Up 2016

With me, your host, Sally Koering Zimney. Together with some fabulous guests, we will have a casual conversation about the art of public speaking. Because a good talk can move the world. And it'll be fun. Yeah, I would think making alien cows meaningful. That's not a small task. I love your giggle.

Wow.

Oh my gosh, waiting for everybody to figure out the alphabet. Hey movers, it is New Year's Eve. 2016 is finally coming to a close, and I'm just going to say it: thank God. No, really. This has been an interesting moving moments of 2016. 2 years ago, I did the same project to sort of close out 2014. And the Very Personal came out 2 years ago. And some really vulnerable, beautiful things people talked about. And this year, for the most part— for the most part, not totally— it was about the global, the community. A lot of politics. And for myself, as I think about 2016, I can't help but think about the larger world too. Right now there seems to be so much pain and anguish and frustration, and honestly, I watch the news and am aghast too often. But if I can kind of dig into myself and look closely around me, I see so much that has moved me. My kids, gosh, who this year took big risks and proved to themselves they can do hard things and are still doing that. My husband, who took a huge leap of faith riding the roller coaster of entrepreneurship, which, holy cow, Brings you to the edge of yourself like nothing else. Scary and awesome. And truly one of the most moving things about this last year really has been my work. I've had the most amazing coaching moments with people who risked and laughed and failed and got up and tried again. And I love that. I feel so honored to be a part of that. So along with my kiddos and my family, My work is one of the things that is keeping me grounded as I step into 2017. And so right now, in this moment, I'm sitting at my parents' cabin surrounded by my kids. My daughter's working on a puzzle right next to me. My son is, I think, doing Minecraft. And there's the buzz of kids and their bustle and my family and all that comes with a big family when we get together— hilarity and chaos and germs, which is why I have this cold right now. And yet I feel so lucky. So to the chagrin of these people who are stuck with me in this cabin over the last several days, they were my audience. So I asked them to share with me a moving moment from 2016, from about age 6 to age 72. So here's a sampling of what I heard. I hope you enjoy. Well, I just mean something that has like shifted your perspective in some way.

Who did we lose this year?

A lot of people.

We lost a lot of people this year, right?

Mm-hmm. Prince, David Bowie, Leonard Cohen.

Prince was moving.

Yeah, that was kind of amazing, wasn't it?

A little flashback to walking through the pool, the Redwood Pool, along the side of the Redwood Pool in Apple Valley, and when Doves Cry was on. And I'm saying to myself as an almost teenager, ciao, bye-bye. This really good-looking group of teenage girls across the pool. And I'm like, what sort of dance move do you do at Dove's Cry? That's not really moving.

I don't know, it brought you back.

But as I remember Prince passing away, I can't— you think of a lot of moments where music connects you to moments in life.

Yeah, totally, music.

And Prince is a very memorable music connection to moments in life.

Totally. Yeah, I'm asking everybody what's something that moved them in 2016, as today is the last day of 2016. Wait, I don't think I can hear you.

What? I'm thinking.

Oh, okay. High pressure? Okay, go away, Mom, go away.

I don't know.

What's the first thing that jumped to mind?

The commercials with the Syrian refugees.

Oh.

Those were sad.

Really sad. Opened your eyes to something that you didn't know was there? All right, okay, Joss, what about you?

What do you think?

Probably like all the clothing companies that are supporting animals, like Ivory Ella and The Paws Company. Like, it's kind of moving to know that they're like creating a whole clothing company and spending all this time to help raise awareness and save animals. That's kind of really amazing to me.

So what's something that's moving? I would say the When I think about the single biggest thing that I've thought about over this past year that's sort of, let's say, emotionally ignited me, it's conflict. I think 2016 has been a year of conflict. And I work in a profession where I have conflict all the time. And so I'm sort of used to it. But there's really good conflict and bad conflict. And what I've seen in 2016 that's sort of been frustrating is bad conflict, a lot of it. In good conflict, when you're engaged in a conflict situation, good conflict looks like something that makes you clarify your positions, that makes you think about things that are important to you, that if you're intellectually honest, that challenges some of your beliefs and that you, you know, acknowledge and then deal with that challenge. And what I've seen a lot in 2016 is more and more people running away from conflict. People listening to people who agree with them, reading, you know, quote-unquote news websites that echo their opinion and that, you know, they don't— because they echo their opinion, they don't put any intellectual honesty into, you know, do I really think that Senator Joe Biden descended from an alien from the planet Xena? I don't, you know. I don't know, but there's a website out there that says that, and somebody looked at it and said, "Yeah, that's true." They haven't thought it. Because I believe in the clarity of conflict, I believe it's an important thing. I'm really— how it has motivated me is to try and be the kind of person, be the kind of present person in conflict that I expect other people to be. To be. And what that means is that I'm spending a lot of time thinking about and trying to challenge some of my preconceived notions. And I'm trying, you know, sometimes with significant effort, to view other people's points of view as coming from a good place. Because I think— I really do believe that most people's opinions and ideas and positions come from there. And so that's, I guess, what's motivating me is the idea that good conflict requires work and it requires effort and it requires empathy and it requires understanding. And so I'm motivated in 2017 to try and do those things and hopefully to find it in others.

Nice. Good luck with that. As you think back on 2016, what is something that has moved you? And here's what I mean by that, like something that changed your mind or that moved you emotionally, that made you think or cry or pause or reflect or laugh.

Hamilton.

Hamilton? Tell me about it. What do you mean?

Um, 'cause like mostly music, I mean, I liked it, but I didn't really pay attention to the lyrics at all. And Hamilton, like, really changed that. Now I like paying attention to the lyrics, and besides reading the book that starred in the musical, which I got for Christmas, um, just reading the lyrics really tells the story. And I think it's a really cool soundtrack because it's like a story but music all in one. But aside from, like, a normal musical, like, just telling a story in the music, it feels like An actual experience, like you're there, kind of.

Mmm, cool.

I say what Luke said.

You like Hamilton too? Yes. Moment.

Something that made me laugh was this morning, actually. I was going to wake up my brother Nick, and it was pretty dark in the room, and I was actually talking to his feet the whole time. So it kind of taught me that Light brings a lot of things out.

Ooh, there's depth in there. I like it.

Yeah, so that was like something funny that moved me. And then something that's like moved me that was like kind of sad was I've been like— we watch CNN Student News in the morning and like all the fighting that's going on in ISIS and like the Middle Eastern kind of place. Well, it's all like kind of puts other people in havoc. And so it's, it's like good when we can help them. And I'm very grateful for like our military that are there helping protect us. And I like, I pray every night for those people that live there and then like they're just bystanders that can't do anything about it. They're being taken from their homes, separated from their families. And a lot of being tortured by ISIS. And something else that moved me this year was Donald Trump getting elected. I mean, I'm happy for him, but I'm also a little worried about our country. Like, I feel like with his new plans, we're gonna have a lot more wars. So, gotta be prepared for that.

Thanks for sharing, Ryan.

Yep.

Okay, what do you think, Will?

Um, I think that, um, my favorite thing that made me laugh today was like, this morning, like, I actually was like, I woke up and my sister was still asleep. I was like, it felt like it was really like clay, and I felt like I was in the car.

Silly goose.

I think that it started in personal life with my family, that it's hard to keep a good perspective on things, and I feel like I'm just startled at the racism. Startled at it, that people are disregarding it. It's just that I've never seen that happen before so openly. And yet, maybe I'm not looking at their perspective. So that's the part that I'm struggling with, is that these are good people. And why would they do that? Why would they vote for someone who identified themselves with racist talk? So there must be a good reason. So I'm trying harder to respect the other person. But I'm really startled. It's been 2016, and I think it's not been a very good year. But maybe it's a year of lessons. Lessons about how we think and how we do things. In a positive view, it's probably been the best year I probably have had in 10 for my health. That's a good side. But I'm real disappointed in how we are doing things as a country. I really— I'd move to Canada if I could reasonably think it would work. I think they have a much better perspective on life than we do. I think we're selfish as a country right now.

And Justin Trudeau is such a dreamer.

But I'm not sure we are selfish. See, that's the part that I'm struggling with. Are we selfish, or am I just not able to understand the other side. That's what I'm trying to say.

What about you, Nicholas?

Um, well, my fish died.

Oh.

So that changed me a lot.

Yeah. What was your fish's name again?

Crazy.

Crazy. And how long did you have Crazy?

A few years. Like 3 years? 7 or 8 years. Didn't we get him when we were 3?

That is a crazy long time to have a fish. Crazy, good name for Crazy. Oh my gosh, so what did you do when he died?

Uh, well, we put him in a check box and then we, um, buried him in our backyard and put, um, a grave around where we buried him.

You did, to help remember him. Yeah. Oh nice, and And then did you guys have like a little ceremony?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh.

Yeah, he was with you guys for a long time. Pets are very special to us. You're walking out the door.

Oh no.

We're about to say goodbye. What comes to mind when I say something that moved you in 2016? Oh, Sally. What moved you in 2016? I caught you. I caught you. I thought I was gonna sneak out of the cabin. No. Um. Gosh, Sally, I don't know.

I guess—

I don't know. How about your business? I'm kind of moved by the risk and the courage of what you've been doing.

Um.

I am moved by— What being brave and what can happen if you're brave. So there you go.

I love it.

Be brave.

Be brave.

Dare magic. Dare to try something new. Give yourself the chance and it might work out. Look at you. Look at Michelle. MKphotography.com. www.michellekphoto.com.

MichelleKPhoto.com.

Heather's got 95-year-old grandparents. So what moves you about them is, and I think it's 70 years, 73 years of marriage, 75 years of marriage. No, is that right? Yeah, they were 19 and 20. So 75 years of marriage. And they are such a good example of unconditional, lifelong love. And then I was always amazed by Grandpa. Grandpa Ulihan and Koering, but Grandpa Springer is another one from that great generation, World War II veteran, and just the consummate grandfather that you would emulate and say, "I want to be just like him when I'm 95." I'm sitting in the chair and all those people are coming to be with you, and they all tell you how much they have learned to be better men. That was a very moving moment, not only at Thanksgiving, but we just did Christmas with them thinking we weren't going to make it to Christmas. I'm very thankful for that sort of influence in my life. Even though he wasn't my grandpa, I was very moved by watching and learning and seeing how he did it and does it.

So—

Don't know that I'll get back from the cabin and he'll still be alive, so— I say 2016, hats off to doing it right like you did.

So to all of you on this New Year's Eve 2016, good riddance to a year that brought a great deal of anguish to this world. But also brought health to my dad, new opportunities for my kids, moments with grandparents, another chance each and every day to make a difference. So here is to 2017. I am wishing you all that chance to take big risks, continue to move this world of ours to a better, more peaceful, and joyous place for all. Peace out. You wanna say goodbye, Harper? Nicholas, you wanna say peace out 2017?

Peace out 2017!

Dab. Okay, Harper, how about you, honey bun? I have no idea.

You have no idea? Nothing?

No idea? Nothing's moved you? Did anything make you laugh this year?

Yeah.

Oh, how about when I made you pee on the carpet?

Oh!

I made her laugh so hard she peed on the carpet.

Okay.