162: MMM - On Getting Over Content-Creation Overwhelm

Hey everybody, and welcome to This Moved Me, a podcast about creating talks that move the world. With me, your host, Sally Koering Zimney. Together with some fabulous guests, we will have a casual conversation about the art of public speaking, because a good talk can move the world, and it'll be fun. Yeah, I would think making alien cows meaningful. That's not a small task. I love your giggle. Wow. Oh my gosh, so we're waiting for everybody to figure out the alphabet. Hey movers, it's Sally here on This Moved Me. See, you're a mover, it's This Moved Me, and here I am talking to you because you are people who are creating talks that you want to move the world with them. And how cool is that? I'm a presentation coach, and I'm so thrilled to have these conversations with you and to help you on the journey, to walk with you on the journey, and to give you hopefully some more insight and guidance, because it can be a really isolating experience creating talks. Because unless you can afford to bring in a coach and walk with you on the journey, it's really all up to you. Even when you've got a communications team helping you out, you're the one standing up there. And so I— my goal here is to bring you insightful conversations with people who are doing the work, but also to share with you some of my insight and expertise as somebody who has been coaching people for 20 years or so, thereabouts. So today what I want to talk with you about on this week Sally Koering Zimney moved me, is about the overwhelm that I am feeling right now. Because I know I'm not alone. And when I work with the speakers, we are in a creative process, and I am kind of meta-experiencing it. Even though the content creation I'm working on right now isn't a new talk, it is content creation nonetheless. And so, I am just— Feeling overwhelmed. And you might, uh, you might know if you are one of my subscribers over, like, you get my emails and you kind of get the inside scoop on things. I, I've been really quiet on the email front, and that's mostly because I'm so busy doing other things. Uh, that's part of it, but the other part of it is, as I've been saying, I'm just kind of off my game and I can't find I can't get my groove on. Stella, talk to me about how you got your groove back because I'm not there right now. So I just want to share with you really vulnerably that I'm struggling a little bit, and I know that that is an experience that many of you have again and again too. You might be like cruising along, things are going well, you're just— things are clicking, and then all of a sudden it just feels like I hit a brick wall. Wall. And the truth is, I'm not any more or less busier than I have been before. It's just right now I'm feeling stuck and, uh, overwhelmed, right? And my husband happens to help people when they're stuck, so we've had lots of conversations about this. He's a leadership consultant and blah blah, does all that good stuff. And we're very different. Our brains are totally different on this stuff. As he has often told me when I've felt overwhelmed, that, uh, you just need to make some decisions about what you are going to do and of course what you're not going to do. So I want to share with you what my plan is for getting myself out of this drowning, overwhelming kind of feeling where I'm at right now, and with the hopes that if you are also feeling overwhelmed or if you're in the midst of your own content creation right now and are kind of up to your eyeballs falls, and it's hard to know what to do next or how to pull ourselves out of this, that maybe there's some little nuggets in here for you. So, the first thing that I'm going to do is recommit to producing weekly content. So, if you've been listening to the show for a long time, you know that for a while I was— a show came out every Wednesday like clockwork. There was, you know, I didn't really take breaks or, you know, things got a little quieter in the summer, but for 10, 11 months of the year, it was every Wednesday a show came out. And even for a while, I was doing 2 shows a week, and it was madness, people, madness. And people were like, how do you do that? How are you producing that much content? Well, it wasn't that I wasn't busier then with my coaching clients. I was. I was just incredibly committed and disciplined about it. I did not negotiate that away. It was higher on my priority list than other things, and that is what has, has changed. So I am committing back to weekly content, and I, I'm hoping that just making that commitment will help sort of snap in some of these other pieces that help pull you out of the rut and out of the stuck. So that is the first thing that I'm going to do is I'm going to ship something every week. Thinking of it as sort of a mini goal. For me, that's going to be a podcast every week. I'm going to do it between now and the end of May because summer, I have 3 kids, they come home, it's insane. I can't— I'm not going to promise anything for this summer. But between now and the end of May, I'm gonna publish something every Wednesday, and I really want you guys to hold me to this, okay? But more importantly than that, I want you to join me on some kind of mini goal, some commitment, a weekly commitment for yourself to share something, to put something out into the world. And it could be, you know, something simple and small, like some writing that you're working on. It could be you're gonna do some Facebook Lives to help get your message out there more and just commit to that. Maybe you are like finding that you need to do meditation to help bring some quiet and peace to your life, and you're gonna do that every week. You're gonna commit to it, although you probably should do it more than that, FYI, if you want to get something out of it, as far as I understand. I don't meditate myself. I probably should. That would help me. But anyway, yep. It is about commitment. It's about a decision that you make, and so that is the decision that I made. Committing to creating something weekly, getting it out into the world. No more excuses, just commit and do. The mantra I'm bringing to mind, of course, is Yoda: Do or do not, there is no try. Okay, so either do it or I won't, but I'm gonna do it. Okay, we're gonna Yoda our way through this. That's number 1. The second thing that we're gonna do is I'm gonna get more selfish with my time. Now this is something I've talked about before, and I know that I need to do this, but I'm not good at doing that because I have, I mean, I've got all the reasons in the world why it's hard for me to be selfish with my time. I have 3 kids. That right there, that should be enough, don't you think? But I'm also building this business and I work full-time and I'm volunteering at school and I, I want to say yes to every request for coffee and I want to help out friends and I want to be there for people. And by the way, I'm married and, and you want to be present for the people that you love in your life. Well, you end up giving a lot of yourself away. I'm giving a lot of myself away. And though there's part of that that is exactly how I want to live my life, especially right now when my kids are young. I wanna, I wanna be there for them, but I also need to start saying no to other people so I can say yes to myself, which sounds a little cheesy, but that is it. And I'm a people-pleasing, Minnesota nice, Middle America gal, and I haven't been good at that. So it's got to happen, and I'm going to do that. So I'm— what I'm wondering is if there any of you out there that want to also join me in saying no more yes. All right, I mean, say yes to no, saying no, right? Unless it is a hell yes, and then we say no. That makes sense? You guys follow me there? If it is a hell yes thing where, like, this is in line with who you are and how you want to live your life, not doing it for other people, but doing it because it aligns with your values and it aligns with your goals, and, uh, really being strict and a little more selfish. I went to this talk once that was sort of about women in leadership and how we in particular have a hard time being selfish with our time, and that in order for us to actually make good on our purpose, we have to be more selfish. And unless it feels a little selfish, we're probably not doing enough of that kind of work. Like, creating space in our lives. And that really helped me to think of it as selfish, and that— I would never want to be called selfish. Like, that would feel terrible. And yet, that's probably the arena that I need to move towards, is just be a little more selfish with my time so I can make good on this purpose that I have that I feel really passionately about. So, I hope you will join me in saying no unless it's hell yes. Let's do that. Okay, so we're gonna channel Yoda, we're gonna get more selfish, and then we are going for more raw and real and battle back this perfection thing, which if you've heard me on the show, I talk a lot about how the goal for us as speakers is connection rather than perfection. And I absolutely believe that. That is what I go for in my life. I'm not always great at it, but that is my goal, and it is what I want for my speakers and what I am pushing them to create more of in their talks and in their lives. Because if it's in our life, it's in our talks. And As much as this is in my lifeblood, I am having the darndest time with getting myself out there right now and not really being held back by this fear about the result or how people will respond to it. I mean, I spend way too long writing my email newsletters, but there's some fear right, about will people unsubscribe, right? Oh gosh, it happens! But that's okay, and I know that's okay, but it can feel really vulnerable because I spend a lot of time creating them, and I really put a lot of love in it because I want it to be meaty and valuable for you. And it's slowing me down. I've got this online course coming down the pipeline. I'm spending a lot of time preparing for it and thinking about it, and it's, it's slowing me down, this, this wanting it to be, uh, this beautiful picture in my mind. And I think I need to lower my expectations and be a little raw— not just real, of course I want to be real, but the raw bit— and just letting it be messier, letting it be what it is. So I listened to this podcast episode the other day from Marie Forleo and Amy Porterfield, and my hope is that you've heard of them, right? Marie is this amazing business coach, and I've done B-School with her. She's incredible. And Amy Porterfield, who's this online marketing expert, and I have like a bajillion things to learn from her. And the two of them came together And Marie Forleo is this like really sassy— she's from New Jersey and she swears a lot, but she's kind of an ass kicker, and that was what I needed that day. And she said to me— she, she— not to me, it felt like she was talking to me, but she was saying to everybody on the podcast, like, quit worrying about how people are going to respond to what you do because people already do not like you. And it— I was like, oh my gosh, you're absolutely right. People already don't like me. And the people who do like me are the people who should like me. Or like, that makes sense. And if they don't like me, that is totally cool. It was kind of— I've never really heard it put that way. It just was this wonderful release. People don't like you already, Sally Koering Zimney, right? But, but for me, there was always this extra weight in this idea of people liking you or not liking you, because what people have always told me was my strength was that I was likable, that people liked me. So, oh my gosh, if people don't like me, have I done something wrong? Like, the pressure that that put on me to make sure that people liked me, because if that's my strength, then that should be happening, when in reality that is just absolutely the wrong way to go about life, because those are meaningless connections. If I am being me and they don't like me, then that's a good thing. That's a good thing that we're getting clearer to who our people really are. I don't want everybody to like me, so I need to just remind myself of that. My guess is that a lot of you out there also need to remind yourselves of that. Too. Because the wonderful thing about focusing on raw and real is that it will weed out the people who don't like you, and that's a good thing! And the other bonus to that is raw and real takes less time. Gosh, we can just like lower expectations a little bit and get our butts out there. So Yoda, I'm gonna commit. I'm gonna get more selfish, and I'm gonna keep it raw and real. And I hope that if you are struggling like I am, maybe there's something in here that's helpful for you. But I also invite you to hold me accountable to this. And if it's Wednesday and you're not seeing an episode out there, you feel free to poke me about it and be like, "Sally, you said you were committing to it, weekly content. Get your butt out there." Alright, that's it for me. Oh, but I will say, you guys, if you haven't listened to last week's show, right, how to jumpstart starting your talk, that's another great way to get started. Go check that out. There's a really great download on there with the guide, the 5-point outline guide that is super helpful. I use with all my clients. And Taylor Kroonquist from a few weeks ago, Presenting online, Taylor is just a genius and kind of blows my mind again and again. Next week, next week, Jillian Farabee is gonna be on the show. I love Jillian. I met Jillian at the Story Conference. She is a— she used to be a talent scout for Cirque du Soleil. She's an actor, she's done clowning, she's done improv. I mean, she is a performer. So skilled. But what's wonderful is when she gets up on stage to present for herself, it doesn't feel like a performance. She is truly— like, one of my favorite things about her is it didn't feel like a performance. She was absolutely herself. That it was like there was no barrier between she and me, her audience. It felt so one-on-one and so grounded. And so in her body, which is what she talks a lot about. So I can't wait for you to check it out. That'll be next week. All right, until then, Movers, thanks for joining in with me. I would love to hear from you. Are you feeling overwhelmed right now? What are you gonna do to help crawl out of the overwhelm and get back into the groove? That's what I'm gonna Maybe we can do it together. That'd be great. So if you hear something in the background, screaming perhaps, or laughter and joy, because really that's what's happening in my house all the time, of course. So, um, I don't remember what I was gonna say. What was I gonna say? Oh my God, I seriously have no idea.